Severe heart attack fear and phobia

[Chronic911]

I have a severe fear (phobia) of dying of a heart attack. It developed when I experienced my first panic attack over 20 years ago and it has haunted me to this day. Can anyone else here relate to this intense fear that I have? My main sx is chest pressure :weep:. I feel this inner pressure and tension 24/7 during every waking moment. It is horrible and difficult to explain really. I also feel it in the center of my back where my heart would be located and also right below my sternum in the stomach area...the same damn stuff I read about 20 years ago in a public library about sx's of heart disease and angina. I have somehow internalized these fears and they are now present all the time. I did ok for a number of years on benzos until the drugs would always stop working and then end up in hell again plus having to go thru benzo w/d which is in itself hell on earth.

I have been thru 3 benzo detoxes over a timespan of 20 years...xanax, klonopin, and valium. The klonopin nearly killed me literally. I am surprised I am actually still alive today to talk about it. The valium was bad but nothing like the hell you go thru from xanax or klonopin w/d. Now, I am only on lexapro but it does very little to help my anxiety. It is not much better than a sugar pill IMO. I finally lost my job of 20 years and now trying to get on SSDI here in the USA. My life had been literally ripped apart from the anxiety and all the other associated stuff over the years. I feel like I am slowly losing the desire to live. Each day is nothing but fear, tension, heart palps, thinking about dying, never feeling well, insomnia, worry,fatigue...just no zest for living anymore, nada! Can anyone relate to what I have written? I try to meditate daily but nothing seems to relieve this damn pressure I feel in my belly and chest. I feel like I am living in hell daily now.http://t2.gstatic.com/images?q=tbn:t-ZKICtyuzFshM:http://debbiekaufman.files.wordpress.com/2009/07/hell2.jpg

[Granny Primark]

Ive always had this fear.
My mums sisters died of strokes at the age of 25 and 42 then my mum went to bed one night and never woke up. She had just celebrated her 60th birthday. She died of a heart attack.
I havent lost the will to live but when my anxiety gets so high and I cant think of nothing else I just want to sleep.
I wish I could help you.:hugs::hugs::hugs::hugs:

[sjs]

Don't know if this will help but it's quite inspiring. My dad has had 2 heart attacks 20 years apart and is still going strong! Changed his lifestyle to a more healthy one and also has no fear about it! :) Hearts are stronger than we think:cool: My dads in his 70's!

Your physical symptoms are anxiety related IMHO and although youv'e been anxious about having a heart attack for 20 years you have never had one so you can be very confident that your heart is strong and healthy. Ensuring your lifestyle is great will help enormously with that confidence. Small steps, one day at a time etc....

All the best :hugs:

[Chronic911]

Don't know if this will help but it's quite inspiring. My dad has had 2 heart attacks 20 years apart and is still going strong! Changed his lifestyle to a more healthy one and also has no fear about it! :) Hearts are stronger than we think:cool: My dads in his 70's!

Your physical symptoms are anxiety related IMHO and although youv'e been anxious about having a heart attack for 20 years you have never had one so you can be very confident that your heart is strong and healthy. Ensuring your lifestyle is great will help enormously with that confidence. Small steps, one day at a time etc....

All the best :hugs:Thanks SJS and Lynn for your replies. I only wish there was a way I could erase this fear (memory) from my brain. I think about it when i am not really thinking about it. It is like my brain and body are on automatic pilot. I am just so sick of having my life revolve around panic and anxiety and fears about death and dying from having a heart attack.

[Dazza]

Hi,

I totally know what you are going through. I 've had this very fear since having my first panic attack 2 years ago (there is a history of heart disease in my family). I was doing fine for a while, but it's all come back recently, and I don't have a day where I worry that I'm going to have a heart attack several times a day.

I get so many smyptoms, mostly numbness, pain and burning sensations in arms (mostly left) chest pressures and pains. had endless ECGs, CT and MRI and always comes back clear.

I get so frustrated at my obsession with it. I really feel for you.

I have coped without meds for most of the time, althought when I'm SUPEr tense and in a frenzy of anxiety I sometimes use tranquillizers to put me to sleep for a few hours.

[Typer]

Forever tense...Sounds like you are just tired of dealing with it all. But you have dealt with it for a long time. Have you ever tried hypnotherapy or any other type of help other than meds? (if you don't mind me asking).

I feel as though there is much to try.

I met someone last year who had suffered from anxiety for 40 years...yep 40 and you know what, he cured himself with buddist mediation. He goes to a buddist place not sure what they did, but he is really calm and together.

What I am saying is, never say never. I know its tough and tiring and just so disabling at times, but hope never dies.

[Chronic911]

Darren wrote>>>I have coped without meds for most of the time, althought when I'm SUPEr tense and in a frenzy of anxiety I sometimes use tranquillizers to put me to sleep for a few hours. What meds do you use to put you to sleep sometimes Darren? I absolutely abhor this fear but can't get it out of my mind. It haunts me daily.

[Chronic911]

Typer wrote>>>>Forever tense...Sounds like you are just tired of dealing with it all. But you have dealt with it for a long time. Have you ever tried hypnotherapy or any other type of help other than meds? (if you don't mind me asking).
I do meditate daily Typer but it is not enough. I also try to exercise daily unless I feel really, really bad. I used to be an avid exerciser until all this panic, anxiety, on meds, off meds, benzo withdrawal, heart attack fears and phobias, severe GAD...crap came in and ripped my life to shreds. There is not one day that goes by where I feel normal or well in my mind. I have felt sick everyday for the last two years. I am just so tired of living in this hell daily.:weep:

[Dazza]

What meds do you use to put you to sleep sometimes Darren? I absolutely abhor this fear but can't get it out of my mind. It haunts me daily.

Hi,

I use something called Lexomil (bromazepam). It works like valium really. I only use it when I'm super, super anxious.

I try to calm myself with positive thoughts normally (or visits to the Dr for reassurance).

I really sympathise with you. I also feel haunted by it a lot of the time, despite having had endless heart tests.

[Chronic911]

Hi,

I use something called Lexomil (bromazepam). It works like valium really. I only use it when I'm super, super anxious.

I try to calm myself with positive thoughts normally (or visits to the Dr for reassurance).

I really sympathise with you. I also feel haunted by it a lot of the time, despite having had endless heart tests.Yeah I know Darren. I also have had endless heart tests and many trips to the ER over the years thinking that I was dying. How old are you btw now and how old were you when all this stuff started happening in your life? I was 28 years old when I had my first panic attack.

[Dazza]

Yeah I know Darren. I also have had endless heart tests and many trips to the ER over the years thinking that I was dying. How old are you btw now and how old were you when all this stuff started happening in your life? I was 28 years old when I had my first panic attack.

Hi,

I'm 37. This all started 2 years ago, after my first ever panic attack, which happened just 10 days before I was due to move here to Vietnam. I've had problems ever since, and have spent lots of time and money visiting doctors / hospitals.

I sometimes get really frustrated with the symptoms, as it's the symptoms that get the better of my and then feed the cycle of anxiety. I have good days and bad days. The Dr keeps reassuring me it's nothing cardiac, but the doubt is always there, and as soon as I feel anything in my arms or chest, my mind stars going into panic mode.

I've tried hypnotherapy before, which worked with some success, but I seem to have slipped somewhat recently into unhealthy though patterns again. Will work my way out of it again with time (and probably some more health tests along the way!).

[Chronic911]

Hi,

I'm 37. This all started 2 years ago, after my first ever panic attack, which happened just 10 days before I was due to move here to Vietnam. I've had problems ever since, and have spent lots of time and money visiting doctors / hospitals.

I sometimes get really frustrated with the symptoms, as it's the symptoms that get the better of my and then feed the cycle of anxiety. I have good days and bad days. The Dr keeps reassuring me it's nothing cardiac, but the doubt is always there, and as soon as I feel anything in my arms or chest, my mind stars going into panic mode.

I've tried hypnotherapy before, which worked with some success, but I seem to have slipped somewhat recently into unhealthy though patterns again. Will work my way out of it again with time (and probably some more health tests along the way!).Wow Darren! They say if panic disorder strikes, it usually hits you in your 20's or late teens. Have you always had anxiety? I have always been anxious my whole life but I never required medication or anything like that before the panic started happening to me. How long have you been in Vietnam now? I am in the USA. Where are you from originally? Before you had your first panic attack, how were things going in your life? Were you overly concerned about your heart before you ever had your first panic attack? My name is Carl btw.

[dw2121]

Heart fear is very common with anxiety sufferers, the heart muscle is the strongest muscle in the human body and loves nothing more than a work out, it is very very hard to damage. Its the aretery walls that cause most heart attacks due to blockages and wear and tear. Try eating heart/artery protecting foods such as fish, Nuts (brazil, almond) and plenty of fibre, this may give you the confidence knowing your doing more to protect it, theres a millon ways to die but you dont fear all of them ? so dont fear your heart, let it do its job its been designed to last a along time. we are not put here to live as long as possible thats not the measure of life , were here for a journey so dont fret live day by day and what will be will be :)

[Nattyburt]

My live is ruled by heart attack worries. My dad died suddenly playing badmington - heart attack at 49. There isn't a day that goes by that i don't think something is wrong with my own heart. I get all the symptoms but no actual heart attack. My doctor says my heart is completely healthy and happy - my mind just won't listen (it never does at it's told!) I know in my sane mind that there is nothing wrong, but when the symptoms start my overactive mind jumps me into a frenzied panic. If only there was a drug that could erase memories, now that would be a happy day!!!

[skippy66]

My 2 main worries are stroke and heart attack.

Last week a cardiologist told me my heart is fine. It reassured me for all of 3 days. Then I googled palpitations, read that hypertrophic cardiomyopathy can cause pvcs (which I get every day) - now I'm thinking has the cardiologist hidden this from me coz he knows I'm anxious??

It's a stupid stupid way to think, I'm well aware of this, but I can't stop thinking like this. Every day, my pvcs and palpitations reinforce those thoughts.

It's a vicious circle that I'm struggling to escape from, although some days are better than others.