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B.B.M
01-05-10, 20:37
I have been suffering from Depression for about five years now.

It all began back during the last year I was in boarding school. I stayed on the extra year, to do a course up the college near there. I went there to do ICT, and was sent to do Life Skills, which I quit after a few weeks. I was mostly alone during this time, except I knew one person, but he would go off, and hang out with someone else. Spending Lunchtimes alone, wasn't the best. I would arrive back early to the ICT room, but always had to wait an hour or so. I ended up getting a Distinction for ICT.

After the year ended, I went home, to start college down there. Now...the big blow to being in Boarding school, is that your friends will forget about you....well, maybe not for some, but in my case, yes. So I had six weeks to wait, until I started college again...oh what to do. Oh yes...screw up my life by looking at crap on the internet. You know all those End Of The World predictions that are all over the Internet...yeah, I believed one. It was going to be a huge nuclear bomb, dropped by Russia, in septemeber 2006. As you can tell, nothing happened, but it got to me, and I was scared, but didn't do nothing big...Yet. Because I knew no-one at the college, apart from some old friends, who didn't care, Didn't say welcome back or anything. I would end up eating lunch alone...but not in a Cafeteria, no...outside...near a path...by a stoney carpark...what a great place to have lunch. I was afraid I would be judged if I went into the Cafeteria, heck...even if it was raining, I would still eat outside. That doesn't sound bad thought....but add three hours of waiting before the next lesson, and it gets to you. My mother didn't help things, because I was now home, I would have to get a Job. She would constantly pushed for me to get a Job. With all this stress, I would skip college, and would pretend to be at college, by leaving the house, and just stand around some area, for a few hours. Because I can't lie for long, I told my father, who said he will help me...my mother on the other hand...will never believe anything I say, ever again. Oh yeah, that will come back into play in a bit. So I was giving some Anti-depressants to help me, which they did, and I managed to get through the first year of college.

And then another summer holiday, with no friends and a bragging mother...what to do....TIME TO RETURN TO THE INTERNET....and that's where it all went wrong. I've seen stuff that would make someone stab their eyes. Oh yeah, and the end of the world fears had returned...this time, it's 2012. I became obsessed with the topic, searching about it for hours and hours. Summer finished, I bought myself a Laptop, and back to college....for three days. Due to being warn off, I quit college, and retired back to my room...and that's when we come to today.

Three years with the Internet..what could possibility go wrong....

I've got a HUGE fear of cancer, and a massive Hypochondriac. I still abit scared of 2012, even after proving how stupid it is, myself. I think people are judging me. I'm afraid to make friends. I have no Motivation. I have no self-esteem. I'm afraid of dying. and worse of all...I went back to the antidepressants, and haven't helped me one bit.

And only one person is helping me....kind of. And that's my father. He's doing his best, but he's only one person. Also, he takes over everything. Every Idea I have, Every Job Idea I come up with, He takes over. It's like he doesn't trust. I thought he would, since my mother doesn't.

Remember what I said above, When I told my mother I was skipping college...yeah, she still hasn't gotten over it. She thinks I'm faking all of this, so I don't have to get a Job. OH YEAH, ALL THOSE DOCTORS APPOINTMENTS, AND TABLETS ARE JUST TO STOP ME FROM WORKING. I can't talk to her about my depression, because if I do, she'll just go "Meh" and them mock me, by joking about hugs, and being scared about working.

It's come to the point now, where I hate my mother, and blaming her, for what I've become. I don't want to. But she can't see that.

She doesn't know what it's like to be lonely, scared, and trapped in a small square bedroom. It's amazing I'm sharing all of this, with the Internet, but not with my own mother, because she won't and will never understand.

I'm getting sick and tired, I feel like killing myself (Which I attempted twice) so I can escape this hellhole, I call my life.

After seeing this website, I realise, I'm not alone, and there are people going though the same thing. A place I can find help without being judged, and also help those like me. Hopefully with the help of this website I should overcome this.

Luna
01-05-10, 20:56
I'm sorry you've been through so much. It sounds like you've been suffering a lot with loneliness and depression.

Welcome to the forum.

PixieL
02-05-10, 00:56
Hi BBM, im sorry your feeling so low right now, yes your right this is a great site for meeting people who are in the same boat as you. Many i'm sure have had some of the same kind of experiences in life as you have, myself included with regards the mother thing. I hope you feel in time that there is a way out even if things look a bit bleak right now. The support here is awesome :)

unspoken
03-05-10, 21:50
Hi BBM, I know what you mean about boarding school. I went to boarding school for about 5 years, about 50 miles from here. I wasn't exactly unpopular but I didn't manage to make many real friends there. In the holidays, I never saw anyone. I've been through uni and I have friends but they are a long way away. I don't hear anything from some of them and some of them are travelling around South America at the moment. Anyway I know exactly how lonely it is to only have your parents around you and not to see anyone.

I don't know how exactly to help you with your depression and anxiety. I haven't worked for 5 months now because of depression and anxiety. I started going to the gym in February and in March I started doing a little bit of volunteering in a charity shop. Combined with antidepressants kicking in, I think these have helped me to recover. Try to break down your fears and problems into manageable chunks that you can attempt to address one by one. It is easy to feel overwhelmed when you look at everything all at once, the 'bigger picture'. If you can, try to spend more time out in the open air, just walking around. Set very small, achievable goals, to try to get some self esteem back. Going out and doing volunteering has helped me to build up some self esteem again, even though I don't really manage to talk to anyone. Feel free to PM me if you want to talk more.

PUGLETMUM
04-05-10, 09:51
:welcome:B.B.M - hope you are feeling okay - im sorry you are feeling like this, and have done for so long - i know how you feel totally - when i was ill, alot of my irrational fears centred around catastophic things happening in the world - i had a terrible time after 9/11 and i was obsessed for a time about the world ending on the millenium - i didnt look on the internet - i wouldnt use it for a long time even though we had it coz i was scared of it! - but i think when these things dont happen you feel better. i also relate to not being taken seriously or helped by the ppl closest to you - and it does make you feel bitter - but in time you can get over all of these feelings and build a life for yourself and be happy and fulfilled - why dont you look at a site called livinglifetothefull, where you can start to get some advice about depression, or look into getting some books about the illness - maybe go to the library - i know how lonely you are coz im in the same situation,and it hurts - be kind to yourself:hugs:

B.B.M
04-05-10, 15:05
I'm sorry you've been through so much. It sounds like you've been suffering a lot with loneliness and depression.

Welcome to the forum.
It also doesn't help that my loneliness is due to not being keen of my Generation. I blame my boarding school for opening up my Horizons.

Thanks for the welcome


Hi BBM, im sorry your feeling so low right now, yes your right this is a great site for meeting people who are in the same boat as you. Many i'm sure have had some of the same kind of experiences in life as you have, myself included with regards the mother thing. I hope you feel in time that there is a way out even if things look a bit bleak right now. The support here is awesome :)
My father is looking for a place, for me to live, but I'm not quite sure about moving out, and living on my own. And yes, the support here is Awesome, as I can see from the posts.


Hi BBM, I know what you mean about boarding school. I went to boarding school for about 5 years, about 50 miles from here. I wasn't exactly unpopular but I didn't manage to make many real friends there. In the holidays, I never saw anyone. I've been through uni and I have friends but they are a long way away. I don't hear anything from some of them and some of them are travelling around South America at the moment. Anyway I know exactly how lonely it is to only have your parents around you and not to see anyone.

I don't know how exactly to help you with your depression and anxiety. I haven't worked for 5 months now because of depression and anxiety. I started going to the gym in February and in March I started doing a little bit of volunteering in a charity shop. Combined with antidepressants kicking in, I think these have helped me to recover. Try to break down your fears and problems into manageable chunks that you can attempt to address one by one. It is easy to feel overwhelmed when you look at everything all at once, the 'bigger picture'. If you can, try to spend more time out in the open air, just walking around. Set very small, achievable goals, to try to get some self esteem back. Going out and doing volunteering has helped me to build up some self esteem again, even though I don't really manage to talk to anyone. Feel free to PM me if you want to talk more.
Thanks for the advice, very helpful. I'm planning on joining the Gym with my father, since he wanted to join, but didn't want to go by himself. I've wanted to do some things for charity, so I might look into the Charity Shop Volunteering.


:welcome:B.B.M - hope you are feeling okay - im sorry you are feeling like this, and have done for so long - i know how you feel totally - when i was ill, alot of my irrational fears centred around catastophic things happening in the world - i had a terrible time after 9/11 and i was obsessed for a time about the world ending on the millenium - i didnt look on the internet - i wouldnt use it for a long time even though we had it coz i was scared of it! - but i think when these things dont happen you feel better. i also relate to not being taken seriously or helped by the ppl closest to you - and it does make you feel bitter - but in time you can get over all of these feelings and build a life for yourself and be happy and fulfilled - why dont you look at a site called livinglifetothefull, where you can start to get some advice about depression, or look into getting some books about the illness - maybe go to the library - i know how lonely you are coz im in the same situation,and it hurts - be kind to yourself:hugs:
Thank you for the advice as well. I'll check out that website. I've been recommended some books, but I have a feeling that I will be judged if I buy a one, or borrow one from the library.

PUGLETMUM
05-05-10, 09:49
:)hi, yes i think as depression sufferers we are constantly worried that will will be judged - but at the end of the day you cant prove whether someone isthinking negatively about you - unless they outright say - like your mum has - so why not take it that unless ppl say mean things they probably arent judging you as much as you imagine or they have other things on thier mind, they arent thinking about you. so go ge tthe book or do wha tyou feel will help, like go to the gym with your dad, and look into doing th echarity shop thing - i did it for a while and it was really good -also you may be surprised about how supportive some ppl can be - some are horrible about it and others are very kind - give it a go!:yesyes:

unspoken
05-05-10, 12:14
I'd say with the charity shop volunteering, no one's actually asked me "so how come you haven't got a proper job?" They don't tend to ask many personal questions. It really helped my self esteem to be out there doing something, I was spending my days completely alone before and thinking far too much. So you shouldn't have to tell them your life story. I find it helpful just to have something to get up for and to go out and have light conversation with other people.

My GP prescribed me a book called Overcoming Low Self Esteem, which I got from my local library. I didn't feel that anyone was judging me when I got it out. I also got a book about depression. I wouldn't feel comfortable reading them in a public place but I read them at home and it helped me to understand more about myself and why I feel the way that I do. If you don't feel comfortable getting books yourself, perhaps ask your father if he could get them for you, or look for them online, there are some good places you can get quite cheap second hand books.