To blip or not

[jaded jean]

Hello all.
I thought yesterday as I was feeling much better I was coming out of my blip that was going on for 4 days .This morning however I feel anxious and fuzzy headed does or can this happen with the blips?? I am on day35 of cit.
Thanks Jean

[JT69]

Hi Jean,

Sorry to hear that you are feeling anxious again...join the club!!! I think its still early days for you and the cit and what you are experiencing is quite normal, I used to get blips even after being on it for quite a long time, but it will pass. If it remains there and becomes troublesome then thats the time to talk to your GP about an increase in dose until it settles down again. I do hope the rest of your day turns out o.k. My day thankfully is alot better than the dreadful one I had yesterday.

Take care hun.
JO.xx

[jaded jean]

Hi Jo good to hear you are feeling better.
I did my 'push the boundaries' thing today -I went to visit my dad who lives 30 miles away, this timeI did not get over anxious and cry -no panicking. so, so far so good. When I got home tho I started to feel really dizzy as if I was going to fall over- pass out what ever. I was scared initially . sitting down for long periods is helping but I wonder has this happened because I didnt panic. I had a headache as well/. I probably am expecting too much maybe.
Jean

[JT69]

Hi Jean,

Well done for doing that...you should be proud of yourself. Not sure what caused the dizziness, not nice for you, maybe it was because of what you did and subconciously you expected to panic??? Not really sure, but then the release was the headache. Yes, dont expect too much...little steps...but you are doing so well hun. And I think I read one of your post re going back to work yesterday?? (I was a bit out of it yesterday as you know) but what I would say to you with regards to that is you will know when you are ready to go back as I did, twice I tried to go back and it was too soon and I knew I was pushing myself but when I did go back the 3rd time it was the right time and I went back on reduced hours and slowly built myself up. Remember I was off for 5 months!!! Dont let it become a hurdle for you, you will know and until then take the time you need as we all know time is a healer.

Take care.
JO.xx

[jaded jean]

Jo.
I am beginnig to wonder maybe the suggestion of going back was a catalyst- like auto suggestion. I thought the headache was the 'comedown' I am feeling a bit better, I dont want to start thinking someting else is wrong with me!!
I do have a level of fear about returning back to work . what makes it worse when you get people say 'you know what will happen Jean, if you are off too long you wont want to go back, that does not help the situation eh?
Like you said you start to push yourself, is this to appease others? I think it is sometimes because I feel an element of guilt, did you?
Jean xx

[Jannie2948]

Hello Jean

Well done for getting out and going to your Dad's. Did you go on your own? The dizzy feeling is something that I had for some time in the first couple of months on citalopram, I still occasionally have dizzy lightheaded days now. I had my mg increased after 3 months so maybe give your 20mg a bit longer to really get into your system. I think Jo has said on other threads that it can take months to really feel the full benefit of cit. Now on 40mg I definitely feel better than on 20mg but still had the odd blip, headache, anxcious day so I think it is just an ongoing thing and we learn to deal with these blips as and when they blooming decide to rear their ugly head!! When I went back to work, and I only took 2 weeks off and some of that was holiday!! I used to go in late and finish early, but my bosses are really good with me, even now if I ever have a bad day or don't feel too good they always tell me to go home but I usually get through it, but I at least know I can go home if I need to. I'm sure, as Jo says, you will know when you feel ok to go back to work and just do it one day at a time and see how you go.

I'm just in the middle of a really bad hot flush, oh aint it lovely being a woman!!!

Jannie x x

[jaded jean]

:DJannie
does the cit not calm your flushes I use to get the lying on the BBq type from my bottom to my neck!! I only get a neck sweat if thats a description!! I asked the doc that yesterday about raising the dosage but he said well lets give it another two weeks . he could see a notable difference in me I looked and sounded more relaxed and blow me if I didnt 'come down' today. so .. I will ask for 30mg Iknow you are on 40mg but even reading that scares me:ohmy: Going back to hot flushes etc I cannot seem to differentiate between the two areas of anxiety/ depression or the menopause or do I just say JOB LOT! :winks:
JEAN:hugs:

[JT69]

Hi Jean,

I totally understand what you mean...blooming people and what they say, it so annoys me because they havent got a clue how you are feeling and what you have been through. All I would say is that yes people said to me "will you ever come back" and "how will you cope after being off so long" and "if you dont come back soon you never will" etc etc. I used to get fed up of hearing it. I just shut it all out and knew that when that time came I would be ready and would know I was and would cope. I promise you I felt like you and I was o.k and you will be too, but only when that time is right. You just concentrate on getting well again and sod the lot of them!!! I did it Jean, and I know you will, yes I had dates to go back etc and a couple of times those dates became a couple of weeks later but in the end I did it.

Just think about getting through each day and getting stronger before you even consider the "work" thing.

Jo.xx

[Jannie2948]

Same here, never know if I'm having a flush cos I'm anxious or if I'm still having menopausal hot flushes!! I seem to have been having them for years, although they are not as often as they used to be they are still blooming horrible, duvet on, duvet off, fan on fan off, drives me mad!! Love them on the train and I can always see other women who are having them, melting!! I think they all just blend into one - hot flushes/anxiety/panic all give me hot flushes!! Aint we so lucky :D
Jannie x x

[jaded jean]

JO. I will get there eventually Iknow as I am not the type to sit on my laurels and watch the world go by. I am far too curious/nosey. Itry to keep the work subject out of my mind but I cant... I am thinking about it most of the day every day. I wish I could just freeze it out but cant. but like you say I will know.

Jannie.
ITS GREAT BEING A WOMAN!!!!!!!!
THE GUYS JUST DONT KNOW WHAT THEY ARE MISSING EH:D??
We can cut the fuel bills down when we have the flushes.No one would dare cross us when we are 'having a moment!!! We eventually dont have to shave our legs as we end up having to shave our chins so that will save on razors for a start:winks:.
Jeanxxx

[jaded jean]

I still feel like poo this morning. I think it was the 'work' word that has done this. When I was at the doctors it was mentioned and I was really upbeat about it. fast forward 48hrs I am dizzy shakey -is it the blip or issues with the job??
Any ideas really welcome I do not like being out of work as I love my work with the elderly and they soon forget you when you have been away for long periods of time and I can see that happening.
Jean

[Jannie2948]

Morning Jean, sorry you are still feeling yuk. I know exactly what you mean about the work thing though. I too love my job and I was only really off for a couple of weeks but I was scared of going back but I was so lucky in that my colleagues really were great with me. Only a few knew and those that did were so good with me, my bosses let me go in late and finish early, but whilst I was there I was still very nervous that I was going to have a major panic attack, which I'd had before and then had to get myself home thinking I was dying because I didn't know it was a panic attack!!

Do you work full-time? Maybe just start back slowly, can you work the odd day here and there to make sure you are ready for it? The thing is, once you are there it takes your mind off your 'illness' and it is nice to have your mind busy with other things beside how you are feeling. I know it is hard in the beginning, and you've only been on the meds for about a month, but the only way you will find out is to give it a go, but only if you really feel that you are ready for it. I too was worried that if I was away too long I would be not needed, that someone else would do my job and as redundancies had already been made in other offices I was worried about that! My bosses sent me emails reassuring me that I was 'safe' in my job but I still wanted to get back there.

Hopefully you will start to feel better soon, I know you've thought about increasing the dosage, maybe that is what you need, although it does take some time before you feel the full benefit of the meds.

I hope you have a good day and that you start to feel better real soon.

Jannie x x

[jaded jean]

Hi Jannie and good morning!!
The work issue does affect me greatly, I have al thru my life due to various family issues wanting to please /get everyone to like me. Long story there.. Regarding contact with work itself -it seems the onus has been left on me to contact tem. Itake my fit to work cert. up and 9 time out of ten there is no one there ?? so I leave it on the desk for my team leader wo is by the way a 24 year old BOY!! The tell me they will of course keep me in the loop regarding meeting minutes and anything regarding the scheme managers. Have I received anything have I Bugger? sorry HAD TO SAY THAT:mad: So it feels a bit 1 sided. my 2 community warden friends meet up with me for lunch every so often so I am thankfull for that and their support. But I do think the whole setup is wrong. Am I being too negative here??
Jean

[JT69]

Hi Jean,

Sorry to hear you are still feeling shaky etc and crappy. I think that it may be the work thing as I can relate to feeling like that around that subject when I was off.

I agree with Jannie, you may need an increase in cit. When I took it over the years I often went up to 30mg before settling down and then when I had been settled for a long period I went back to 20mg. We are all different and it may be you need 40mg like Jannie takes, you will only know by trying to increase slowly and seeing how you go. If this is the case then the work thing may not seem such a hurdle and you will find you will cope easier. Just suggestions.

I know for me that even though I know I am not out of the woods especially since this last "blip" I have had, work is a distraction. I wake up feeling horrible but some days yes that lingers and gets me down but other days I go to work and after a couple of hours feel so much better.

I have to work today as its my Sunday in, so am hoping that happens today.

Hope your day gets better hun, you will get there, but you need to be enjoying the things you enjoy doing before thinking of going back to work. Do you work full-time?

Catch you later.
JO.xx

[jaded jean]

Hi Jo yes it is full time. the doctor and the occupationa therapist have both said 2-4 hours a day 3 days a week over a period of 6 weeks or so. I might just be feeling impatient as well. patience is not a word in my vocabulary sometimes.. You are right about the morning thing after about an hour or so the crappy feeling does disappear.:) oh life!!!
Jean