Need to move house.

[Vixxy]

Hi all.
I'm really hoping someone can offer me their experiences or maybe some advise so that I can finally move in to my new home. The house is in Basingstoke and Im in Southampton at the moment.(about a 45 minute drive)

Last october my new husband and I bought our first home together. It took a while for all the paperwork to go through and unfortunately in that time my anxiety shot through the roof!
It got so bad that I could barely leave the house anymore.

So this was 6 months ago and Im still living in my parents house whilst my husband lives in our new home. I dearly want to move house, but my anxiety levels just havent stabalised in that time.

Since christmas my anxiety has been a rollercoaster. Just as I start to get better again it comes back and pulls the rug out from under me. I begin to wonder if thats because when Im better I'll be moving, so the stress knocks me back down again.

Anyways, this leads me to wonder if this move is forever on the horizon, will i ever get better?
What do you guys think? Should i just bite the bullet and move and live with the anxiety or should i stay here and try and get myself to a level where im not going up and down with anxiety?

Bit of background info on my anxiety. Whenever I get bad I find it hard to leave the house. Im also having alot of problems eating because of the anxiety, so im losing weight with not much left to lose before im a twiglet. so im kinda scared if i move ill just stop eating again ><

Sorry its a long winded post. I'm just hoping someone can help me as all I want to do is be with my husband.

Thanks
V

[mumble]

This is a very similar situation to mine a while ago.
I got engaged and was living on my own when my anxiety got dreadful. I became agoraphobic and stopped eating also. I lost two stone over a few weeks.
It took a few goes to move out, down to Bournemouth (from near Basingstoke oddly enough!) and on the final go I took some diazepam and managed to get there as I felt it'd be more productive to be with my fiance and get on a certain track.

Since I've moved I'm struggling with going out but finding it slowly easier and some days eating more, it varies day by day.

Think about how you see yourself feeling in the new place. Would it be nice to go out there and work on the anxiety there?

Not sure if it helps, just thought I'd share a similar experience.

[Vixxy]

That really does help thankyou!
My dad suffers with depression, so hes very negative about my problems. Always thinks im not trying hard enough etc when I really am. So I know when I move out ill be going to be with my husband who totally supports me and would do anything I asked.
Did you get the diazepam because you were moving or were they prescribed before hand? I wonder if something like that would help me.

[mumble]

That's a shame about your father - but certainly positive about your husband - it sounds like what you need right now.
I was given the diazepam just for the move. I literally couldn't get in the car without panicking.

[Vixxy]

Hmm I might ask my doctor about that then. They dont know I want to move away.

[sb001f8994]

Hi,
I moved eight years ago, Id not been out of my road for years previous to the move and surprised myself at even considering puttiing the house up for sale. It sold on the first veiwing and we were off! My nerves were in tatters. What made the situation worse was having to put all our furniture in storage and move into my parents while work was done on our new house. Four weeks turned into 17 and then we were rearing to go. To make the move easier I got my brother to video the journey so I could familiarise myslef with it. And we left at six in the morning to avoid heavy traffic. My journey was five minutes long (would have been 50 mins in bad traffic!). This was the best move I have ever made, not only is the house everything I could wish for but Im getting out more, not like in the old house where the furthest I went was my mums seven doors away.
Getting diazapam from the doctor is a great idea, it will take the edge of it. I hope you move soon, there's no time like the present! Often the anticipation is far worse than the event.
Good luck and take care,

[Vixxy]

Hi Carol. Thanks for the advise. I'm totally not a morning person, but I was thinking that the evening would be best, so that I can avoid most of the other cars on the road!
Did the film of the journey help you?

[jothenurse]

I think I would go ahead and move. I am on the Ativan, that I have to take every day, but just 1 mg., twice a day. I can't take the SSRI's (med phobia). I have lost a lot of weight (20 pounds), because the anxiety makes me so gaggy and I am afraid to throw up. How much is two stones?
I think it would be nice for you to work on your anxiety at the place where you will be living, and with your supportive husband.

[Vixxy]

Hi Jo.
2 stone is about 24lbs.
For me Ive lost about 15lbs since Xmas. Still having trouble trying to put a halt to it.
Ive also got a fear of medication in case it makes me sick. Im going to bite the bullet and try seroxat this week as I know I have to do something to get me eating again.

[curlybird]

I would try to move in with your husband Vixxy. He sounds really supportive and will help you to overcome your anxiety. I think you need that right now.

If you think you need diazepam to help with the move, then go with it. that's what its there for.

I wish you the best of luck with whatever you choose to do! :)

Hugs :hugs:
Curly xx

[pussy cat]

hi there
i totally agree with curly - the sooner you move the better,try the tabs to relax you a little & go for it-the fact that you are not with your husband is making things worse,also the longer that you allow this senario to carry on the more of a big thing the move will be. just try & think right i,m going to do this-plan a time,evening if you feel more comfortable with that & think right in 1hrs time it will be over & i will be in my new home,new things to do & see & a fresh start-your not going to be any worse than you are now & i,m sure you,ll be loads better-the fact that you,ve acomplished the task will make you feel good & you,ve got a supportive husband,plenty to do etc.etc - go for it girl & good luck xx:yesyes:

[micheal88]

oooooooooooo i no what you are going through... i had a nice lil bedroom at my sisters house where i got though anxiety and learned to live with it... just had to move into a flat on my own with my girlfriend... my anxietyyy was really bad i wanted to go home... but trust me perservere i did.. i just kept going.. im still ill now but i am used to living here and i love it.... its bad at first but ull get there beleive me

[diane07]

I actually could have written this thread myself, if its any concellation i am moving next weekend, same distance as you will be, so maybe you can pm me and we'll help each other, i am dealing with agoraphobia, so the chances are the move is going to knock me back a bit.

But i know it can be overcome and beaten, i also know that it will effect my eating so i know i have to deal with that too.

The journey, i couldn't do this 2 years ago as i found it so difficult, there was no way i could be a passenger in the car with my partner.................... but now i do that journey every weekend as we have been moving our stuff to our house every weekend, funnily enough i have to go back there later and won't be back here till sunday, once a journey i used to dread, doesn't phase me anymore at all, so believe in yourself that you can do it.

Even if it knocks you back a bit, i'm sure between us we will get through it, support each other and look back on it one day and wander why we worried so much about it.

di xx