marissa
05-02-06, 09:10
Hi,
I am new to this kind of thing and don't know where to begin. Don't want to use this forum as a form of distraction to make myself feel better. If I'm honest with myself, I have always suffered with feelings of 'out of control, dwell on the what ifs and have an overwhelming irrational 'fear' about going to work. I have quite a responsible job as Marketing Manager and a boss who thinks I am running his company and fundamentally, I'm not sure I want any of it, but don't know what it is i do want... I have a very loving 'helpless' husband and generally life is most definitely good, but having been off work for 2 weeks, one for a holiday and last week with a virus and having had a terrible night last night doing the classic 'what's wrong with me and tears as I write this and the impending doom of work tomorrow, I feel extremely lost, I suppose. I have been to the doctors before and was referred for counselling last year and when the letter came, felt like I didn't need it nor want to to 'waste' precious NHS resource.
Feel like I want to resign tomorrow and my husband says he can't bear to see me like I am and nothing is worth me being like this. I think it's just his way of helping, because although we'd survive, life would change! Also is this a good idea, won't doing nothing perpetuate the 'now what'?
I tell myself go there tomorrow - it won't be nearly as bad as I imagine (whatever that is) and it will be fine. Means to an end. Yet I really don't act let alone think like that..
Can anyone else empathise?
Riss
I am new to this kind of thing and don't know where to begin. Don't want to use this forum as a form of distraction to make myself feel better. If I'm honest with myself, I have always suffered with feelings of 'out of control, dwell on the what ifs and have an overwhelming irrational 'fear' about going to work. I have quite a responsible job as Marketing Manager and a boss who thinks I am running his company and fundamentally, I'm not sure I want any of it, but don't know what it is i do want... I have a very loving 'helpless' husband and generally life is most definitely good, but having been off work for 2 weeks, one for a holiday and last week with a virus and having had a terrible night last night doing the classic 'what's wrong with me and tears as I write this and the impending doom of work tomorrow, I feel extremely lost, I suppose. I have been to the doctors before and was referred for counselling last year and when the letter came, felt like I didn't need it nor want to to 'waste' precious NHS resource.
Feel like I want to resign tomorrow and my husband says he can't bear to see me like I am and nothing is worth me being like this. I think it's just his way of helping, because although we'd survive, life would change! Also is this a good idea, won't doing nothing perpetuate the 'now what'?
I tell myself go there tomorrow - it won't be nearly as bad as I imagine (whatever that is) and it will be fine. Means to an end. Yet I really don't act let alone think like that..
Can anyone else empathise?
Riss