Many worrying symptoms :(

[John_Daryl]

Hi, ill go through the basics.
1. Small red dots on my skin, not many, like 2-3 on each arm and one on knee.
2. Palpable lymph nodes almost everywhere on my body.
3. Bit of leg weakness (think that might be my anxiety).
4. Stress induced IBS
5. Random tingling feeling in my fingers of my right hand

Im convinced I have lymphoma since checking my symptoms on the internet, and when I looked it suggested that the red dots on my skin, albeit not many of them, is internal bleeding :(.

I sit there for hours reading my symptoms up on the internet, and they all point to lymphoma :'(. I can't live like this its really wearing me down and I dont know what to do. I had blood tests for my swollen lymph nodes and they all came back clear, some have been their for 5 years and some for as little as 8 months :(

[John_Daryl]

Guess you guys dont know:unsure:

[ItWillPass]

I cant tell you what you do have... but I can tell you that it is NOT lymphoma or something of the like. I have been having very similar symptoms. I really think that it HAS to be anxiety symptoms. My lymph nodes are totally swollen also. I also have weird rashes all the time, that kinda just come and go. If you are really worried though, I would go to a doctor and get some blood work done just to check that all your levels are normal.

[John_Daryl]

Yes I went about 8 months ago for liver, white count, full blood count etc and they came back fine, and recently had a full blood count one done and they were fine, but im actually sat in my room crying over it all now because im convinced im dying :'(. I can't live like this much longer its really wearing me out, the NHS don't help at all, iv tried pushing my appointment forward but they dont even try

[randomworry]

hi daryl
please try not to stress too much..........do you have friends that you can talk to about your fears.
because the doctors are not concerned you should hold on to that fact. Im sure if you had lymphoma blood tests would have a discrepancy.

[randomworry]

also think back to others times you may have been convinced of something awful daryl and it was not what you thought, that may help

[John_Daryl]

I try, but my mind is so convincing :'(, and with all my friends going off to university soon, and the pressure of me finding a job and losing all my friends and then the health anxiety is just too much for me to cope with :'( sometimes I genuinely feel like harming myself, but I can rationalise those thoughts and tell myself not to, but the thoughts of losing friends and the possibility of cancer.. Its so frightening, my sleeping pattern is all over the place, iv stopped doing hobbies such as seeing friends, going to the gym, gaming, drinking with friends all because of some ****ing lymph nodes, sorry for cursing. Its just all getting to me and the doctor I had offered me no advice for my anxiety or depression only medication.

I just feel like im zoned out and everyone is moving on in life and im stuck in a hole where ill be for the rest of my life, convincing myself iv barely got a year to live because im suffering from late stages of cancer because iv left it so long.

[randomworry]

hey daryl i truly understand where you are coming from........im guessing your quite young........im 25 and it is hard because we are at an age where its all about fun and everyone else seems to have no problems.

trust me you will get through this. Instead of researching lymphoma try just letting the thoughts about illness come and go through your mind without engaging with it. this will help you to be less preoccupied.

do you wanna go in the chatroom. as it would be easier in real time to speak!

[John_Daryl]

I would but i cant, only been signed up for 2 days and your required to be signed up for 5 I think? I can give you my E-mail if you have MSN

[randomworry]

my msn messanger is not working on this computer unfortunately!

[randomworry]

have you had any other health worries before this one daryl?

[John_Daryl]

ok :(
Thanks for your time anyway, every little helps in a way i suppose :'( although its torture every single minute for me atm

[John_Daryl]

Another thing that makes me worry that much more, my grandma died of cancer, but she spotted it so late it had already spread all across her body before they could do anything about it. My mother didn't tell me about it, I found out by looking through her phone because I knew something more was wrong with her but I wasn't quite sure what it was.

It makes me think to myself "have they missed something on the blood tests and now its spreading across my body?" and "are they going to catch it too late?".

I know it's wrong to think like that but I honestly can't help doing it. My mum knows about my problems, and so does my girlfriend and a select few of friends that I can trust with the issue. But they don't support me too well, its like they don't understand what it is i'm going through. They all just say "stop thinking like that, its just stupid" and "your an idiot" and "you need to do more and get it off your mind". They don't realise its really not that simple. I really cant cope any more with it all :(.

Im not even interested in the big build up to the world cup and im a huge football fan. All because of my anxiety and I hate it!

[randomworry]

yeah what you need to do daryl is 'crowd the worry out of your mind' what i mean by this is get really busy and involved in something you love to do. While you do the activity or whatever you will be getting the thoughts such as 'but i have cancer!' but ignore them and continue eventually they will fade away.

[shell24]

Hi Daryl, i really feel for you. i think firstly you need to see a GP for reassurance. Secondly, the full blood count you had would have shown up deranged if you had lymphoma. Im not a doctor but i am a nurse who has experience in haematology. please dont worry you will be fine.

[John_Daryl]

I also have 2 lumps at the back of my head, havnt grown in size and I dont know how long they have been their for.
I dont recall every bringing them up to a doctor either. They arnt the glands because they are at the back near the top, kind of next to the crown.
It might be the shape of my skull and im exaggerating or its lumps. They are symmetrical.

[heather xx]

I know what you you mean about family/friends not being so supportive. I told my boss about my anxitey and he just laughed when he left for the evening he said oh ive got a headache must be a brain tumor!!! My husband gets angry with me after a while it even left him to think about leaving me until i started CBT. Just expain that you cant help it and try and make them understand. You'll be fine. The lumps in your head is just your head our heads are lumpy and bumpy nothing to worry about :)

[John_Daryl]

Also, i know this is off topic, but my doctor said iv got IBS, and whenever i miss taking my mebeverine tablets, my faeces passes straight through me and its green :O. Is this because of the IBS or is the green faeces something more to worry about.

It only does it when im a bit worked up and worrying and miss my tablets.

[Zee]

I had full blood count done about 7 weeks ago Daryl and like Shell says above, my GP told me that there would have been markers on the tests if there was a sign of any problem. Thankfully all was ok with mine but blood tests are a good test for overall general health.

[John_Daryl]

I know, I need to trust in my doctors and believe they know what they are doing, rather than going on the internet looking for the worst possible outcome.

Its amazing how when you suffer from anxiety you link everything small to one major cause. Like a small rash somewhere, or a little red dot on your skin.

Its a horrible feeling going through this and I wouldn't wish it upon anyone.