depression & anxiety

[supporter]

Can anyone please offer me some advice?

My BF was diagnosed with anxiety & mild/moderate depression in July 09, his GP gave him 5mg Cipralex, these were upped to 10mg in Oct 09, and 20mg in may 10.

We lived together until 2 months ago, then the depression and anxiety became too much and he could not cope so moved back to his parents where he felt 'safe'.
Is this a normal reaction with depression?
He no longer feels able to talk to me and wants to be alone, he feels its not fair on me. No matter what I say to reassure him he will not listen to me.

Will Cipralex 20mg help his depression before the anxiety? Will he have side effects again? They hit him pretty hard for the first time and the insomnia/tiredness never really went away.

Any ideas on a time frame for the increased dosage to kick in?

Hoping someone out there can offer me a glimmer of hope:)

Sorry for all the questions but just trying to make sense of this situation!

Thanks... supporter

[fishman65]

Hi Supporter,sounds like your BF has been going through the grinder lately.His decision to move back in with his parents might seem like a rejection of you,but try not to take it as this.I'm sure he loves you just the same.However,this is indeed a classic symptom of depression AND anxiety to try to look for a safe haven.He grew up with his parents (I'm assuming) and sees his childhood home as the best place to try to deal with his problems.

I think the not wanting to talk to you about it is a guy thing,though of course that's not to say that ladies find anxiety/depression easy to talk about.The 'being alone' is also a typical depression symptom.Depressed people often find conversation a huge effort,as if their thinking feels like wading through treacle,so try not to take it personally....its how he's feeling right now.

I have no personal experience of cipralex but I was on cipramil for seven years and it eased my depression and anxiety simultaneously,so I should think cipralex should have a similar effect.Others here may be able to elaborate,but I see anxiety and depression as two sides of the same coin anyway,they have a tendency to fuel each other.

As for the time frame for the drug kicking in,most of the SSRIs tend to become effective somewhere between 2 and 6 weeks as a general rule,allowing for differentials between certain drugs for certain people.I hope this helps a little and that your BF shows some signs of improvement....in the meantime just try to be there for him if he decides he wants to talk.

Take care, Fishy

[supporter]

Thanks fishy,

your thoughts and advice have helped me to understand why my BF has acted in this way.. although it is still hard to be pushed away!

I'm hoping the new 20mg kicks in soon to help him feel and see things a bit clearer.

Supporter

[fishman65]

No problem Supporter,and yes I understand its hard for you,it feels like rejection doesn't it.With anti depressants though,patience is crucial.I'm sure your relationship will get back on track once he starts to feel the benefit of them. :)

Fishy

[supporter]

Another question for you if you dont mind?

Since moving back to his parents 2 months ago he has refused to communicate with me in any way, however he is still able to function enough to go to work and communicate there.

Is this a normal reaction to anxiety/depression? I have now stopped trying to contact him as he got angry with me and told me i caused 'hassle'. I think its because I maybe pushed him a little too much into dealing with things.. in hindsight he obviously was not in the right place mentally to deal with it all.

My thoughts are that once the medication is doing its stuff he may feel in a better place to 'cope' with me and our relationship.

He has been on 20mg of cipralex/Lexapro for 3 weeks now, how long will it be before this takes some affect?

Thanks in advance for any advice you may be able to offer
Supporter

[JT69]

Hi Supporter,

Hope you dont mind me joining in here.

Have read your posts and totally understand what your BF is going through and how you must be feeling.

The fact that he is still going to work is something that he probably feels he must do to keep some kind of normality, plus it is a distraction, and health experts reccommend if you can when suffering from depression/anxiety it is best to carry on going to work as if you take time off it is often then very difficult to get back to work again, so dont let that worry you.

With regards the meds I agree with Fishy, they usually take 4-6 weeks before any benefit is felt, so it is early days at the moment.

I am sure when he begins to feel better he will then want to communicate with you etc and hopefully everything will become normal again. This may take some time though so you may need to be patient.

I think it is brilliant that you want to support him and understand what he is going through as alot of people just walk away and dont want to know!!

I wish you look and hope he is feeling better soon.

Take care.
Jo.xx

[supporter]

Thanks for your input JT69, I appreciate any advice.

The anxiety and depression was diagnosed in July 09 when he suffered from multiple panic attacks out of the blue, his medication has only recently been lifted to 20mg (3 weeks ago) but it has never been changed, so he is still on Lexapro/Cipralex.

Will he suffer side effects again due to the increase in dosage as he did when starting his AD's? How long will these last?

I have read that any change in medication is like starting the process again? so will it take 4-6 weeks to get the 20mg level into his system, before hopefully any improvement is seen?

Sorry to ask basic questions!! Hope you can help again?

Thanks again for any advice given!
Supporter

[fishman65]

Hi Supporter,it IS possible that he may suffer a repeat of side effects after an increase in dosage.However,my own personal experience suggests (and my GP agreed on this) that increases in dosage of the same drug tend to be a smoother ride than starting afresh on an entirely new one.After all,his body will have some degree of tolerance if it has been introduced to the drug previously.As to the time scale in seeing an improvement via the increase,it is likely to be similar to the original introduction,judging from my own personal experience.Incidentally,once again my GP appeared to concur with my own thoughts on this subject and told me he had seen similar outcomes in other patients he was treating.

Hope this helps, Fishy

[supporter]

Hi Fishy,

thanks for that... helps me to understand things a bit clearer!

I guess I'll just have to sit and wait for a few more weeks and hope to see an improvement.

Hope you are feeling well and things are working out for you:)
Supporter