Open (closed?) minds

[Zingara]

I finally got an appointment to speak to someone at a place called Open Minds - it's a sort of all-purpose mental health drop-in centre. The appointment was a disaster. I spoke to a mental health nurse who seemed both bored and combative. I got the feeling that she 'took against' me, and during the half-hour conversation I kept feeling hot and dizzy. She didn't listen properly, kept looking down at her notes while I was talking, and interrupting me to ask trivial questions. At one point she asked me 'What do you do with your days?' 'Well,' I said, 'I write quite a lot, in fact, I've just finished a novel.' She gave me a cold, blank look and said, unsmiling, 'No, I meant things that take some effort, some get up and go, like playing squash or something.'
She ushered me out while I was almost still in mid-sentence, and close to tears, saying that there was nothing that could be done for me because my problem did not meet any specific criteria and so could not be categorised, and would not respond to CBT (that seems to be the only therapy they can conceive of).
Oh well...

[MidnightCalm]

She sounds awful.
Don't take one bad experience as what it'll be like on a whole, try again with somebody else, maybe go somewhere else?
People on this forum seem to have someone they go and see who's really helpful, you just need to go to the right place I guess.

[Vixxy]

I had a very very similar experience about 2 months ago. I was referred to see a CBT therapist and when I spoke to her she told me that she couldnt treat my phobia (of being sick) as it didnt come under the boundries for anxiety and depression. I pointed out that it did. Then she told me I was anorexic, which Im not. Im not eating because im worried about being sick not fat! She made me feel embaressed for my problems and it was as if she didnt really care.
She made me feel like I was alone and would get no help at all. I was on the way up before I saw her and she made all my confidence crash down and I became very ill again.
Luckily for me she referred me to another therapist when she decided she couldnt help me and hes been really good so far.
So the moral is that if at first you dont succeed, fire the first one and get a new one! Im sure there will be another nurse at the centre and you should ring up and ask to speak to them or the centres manager and lodge a complaint.
I am sorry to hear you went through this, it really hurts and makes you feel even more alone. Youre not!

[Danath]

aw that sucks hun, as a fairly angry person i would probably gone quite ballistic at her. Indeed I had a similar experience with a consultant psychiatrist, I accepted his diagnosis, sionce he was obviously qualified to give it, but what I didnt accept was him saying 'theres nothing myself or anyone can do for you', thats what caused me to insult him on my way out of the room. I also filed a complaint about the guy, but his position as a consultant protects him sadly.

Like the other guys say, don't let it knock you back, there are some excellent mental healthcare folks out there who are very caring and excellent.

I never understood people in the medical trade who were crappy to just about everyone.

[Zingara]

Thank you all very much for your replies - good to know that I'm not alone, though of course I'm sorry you've also had bad experiences. I thought of complaining, but I just feel too demoralised, really. I just think it's weird that 'emotional issues' - which is what she described my problem as - is something that apparently isn't treated. She kept saying that their policy was not to allow 'clients' to discuss the past - apparently it's 'all about now' - but what are you supposed to do if your problems relate to things that happened in the past? Just stop whinging and live with it, apparently...!!!
I'll keep trying - I'll wait for the dust to settle and then go and tell my GP what happened and see if he has anything to suggest - though he can sometimes be a bit dismissive as well. It is hard to take - I had invested a lot of hope in this Open Minds thing, and it really is hard to feel, well, almost rejected. She made me feel as though I was some sort of freak.
Anyway, thanks to all of you for replying. Danath, I wish I had stood up for myself like you did - i think I was actually too nice, and didn't challenge her enough.

[Bill]

It sounds to me that sadly, 10 years on, things still haven't changed because that's how I was treated. I don't know the full picture but speaking generally, it always seemed to me that anxiety sufferers often fall outside the boundaries because anxiety isn't regarded as an actual mental illness because anxiety is created by fear, stress and worry based on our past experiences combined with our personalities.

I think for us the therapies that help most are provided by psychologists, counsellors and CBT therapists whereas CPN's and psychiatrists appear to be more interested in actual mental illnesses hence their attitude that they can't help.

what are you supposed to do if your problems relate to things that happened in the past?

What I would suggest is that you seek out a counsellor but you need not pay as often they can be found through churches and charities if the surgery can't offer one. As I say, I don't know your issues but I'd also consider telling your doctor that you really want to see a therapist or psychologist as I think they would help you much more.:hugs:

[daybyday]

It can be frustrating and increase anxiety trying to find someone who is a good fit to help us. I am still looking outside of my psychiatrist, but am limited with money and insurance acceptance of only certain people.

[marie1974]

Hi Matey, thats terrible, my god, I had a slightly similar experience some time ago when i went to gp and got to speak to a mental helath nurse about my anxiety etx, i said i wanted some sort of counselling, even if it was group counselling and all she could offer me was counselling over the phone, which to me was totally waste of my time going there.

I know places like samaritons etc are great if u suffering, but when u got alot going on and u want regualr support, its nice to have face to face contact, well i do anyway, so i came away feeling alittle saddened by it all.

Im sorry u had such a bad experience, but dont give up, there r some very nice people out there who will point u in the right direction of people that can help. xx