Raa
22-06-10, 22:18
Hi Everone,
I have suffered from panic attacks since I was a child, can't remember when I had my first one. The used to be a reason for them at first like the war, abusive parents, arguments, high levels of stress, constant demand to preform beyond my ability.
However now they just come for no reason at all. Last one was 2 days ago and it was the worst I've ever had. My legs started twitching on their own like I was having a seizure and than my whole body started shaking along with my jaw, it was like I was having hyperthermia except I wasn't cold. But the worst isn't the panic attacks themselves, no, the worst is the absolutely horrific morbid thought that go hand in hand with the panic attacks. Like the one 2 days ago when it started with nausea laying in bed, than I felt the sudden need for everything to stop moving at which point my brain realized that nothing will ever stop moving because the earth is spinning and constantly moving. Just that thought right there; The planet is spinning and will never stand still. Sent me into a full blown horrific panic attack where I was so convinced I was going to go insane if I wasn't already so (I mean who has a panic attack because the earth is spinning). It's positively laughable right now! But when it was all happening it was so funny. I have real morbid thoughts as well, but those are too personal for me and in any case best too wanna save some for later..:blush:
I found this website while I was researching panic attacks and found that morbid thoughts where common according to one of the members on this site. All the pages on panic attacks never addressed the morbid thoughts part, so I thought maybe something something else was wrong with me than, like schizophrenia or bipolar, since in the morning a panic episode feels totally unreal, like I was not me and my thoughts were not my own.
In any case I am relived to hear some ones elses voice in the darkness!
I have suffered from panic attacks since I was a child, can't remember when I had my first one. The used to be a reason for them at first like the war, abusive parents, arguments, high levels of stress, constant demand to preform beyond my ability.
However now they just come for no reason at all. Last one was 2 days ago and it was the worst I've ever had. My legs started twitching on their own like I was having a seizure and than my whole body started shaking along with my jaw, it was like I was having hyperthermia except I wasn't cold. But the worst isn't the panic attacks themselves, no, the worst is the absolutely horrific morbid thought that go hand in hand with the panic attacks. Like the one 2 days ago when it started with nausea laying in bed, than I felt the sudden need for everything to stop moving at which point my brain realized that nothing will ever stop moving because the earth is spinning and constantly moving. Just that thought right there; The planet is spinning and will never stand still. Sent me into a full blown horrific panic attack where I was so convinced I was going to go insane if I wasn't already so (I mean who has a panic attack because the earth is spinning). It's positively laughable right now! But when it was all happening it was so funny. I have real morbid thoughts as well, but those are too personal for me and in any case best too wanna save some for later..:blush:
I found this website while I was researching panic attacks and found that morbid thoughts where common according to one of the members on this site. All the pages on panic attacks never addressed the morbid thoughts part, so I thought maybe something something else was wrong with me than, like schizophrenia or bipolar, since in the morning a panic episode feels totally unreal, like I was not me and my thoughts were not my own.
In any case I am relived to hear some ones elses voice in the darkness!