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montana
25-06-10, 22:31
hey
Just joined up and really looking for help/reassurance and talking through my issues.
I suffer from health anxiety - and have suffered from it for the last 3 years. It all started in 2007 when i watched my husbands 9 year old son die from cancer and then his mother. i was pregnant with our son at the time following 5 years of IVF treatment so my ability to deal with emotional trauma was severely compromised.
The first time HA reared its ugly head was following hospitalization in 2008 with extreme stomach cramps which turned out to be - you guessed it - nothing. I was astounded that my mind could produce such physical pain - prescribed Dosulepin. After 6 months i decided enough was enough and stopped taking them. Over the next couple of years i decided i had throat cancer - then lung cancer - stomach cancer - bowel cancer - always ending in my biggest fear of cancer. i have paid £100's in private tests etc over the years. For the past week i have had really really bad stomach cramps again and have been in a real state again, which resulted in me swallowing my pride and going back to the docs again! today. she thinks its anxiety and prescribed Citalopram and counselling - again.
I am at a loss to explain how my mind can be so powerful - if it is that - and getting so fed up with it - i mean it took me 5 years to concieve my son - he is nearly 3 now and i just want to enjoy raising him but instead i have had the most awful 3 years.

the stomach cramps is anxiety isnt it? but its so painful........

Sorry to ramble
Montana x

sjr1969
25-06-10, 22:34
hi, you poor thing, you have seen a lot and experienced alot of pain, no wonder you feel the way you do. i think stomach cramps can be an anxiety symptom yes. but why dont you get some reassurance from your doctor just make your mind settle?

sarah x

ScaredCaz
25-06-10, 22:38
Hi Montana

Welcome to NMP :hugs:sorry you are having such a hard time but hopefully with a little help from some of the people here you can start to see the wood for the trees

I know how confusing this all can feel because you really don,t want to be ill yet your mind makes you feel these pains and that contradicts your thoughts believe me i know exactly how that feels also when i am anxious my stomach is the first to suffer in my mind i try to view it like a bit of a battle i accept i have pain or feel unwell and then tell my self ALOT that i know this is anxiety i have felt like this before and it will pass and it does eventually

It is all to easy for someone to say that but a little harder to put in practise when you feel this way i know dont be a stranger to these forums there are some really nice kind helpful people on here always happy to help and listen

i hope you feel better soon best wishes

Caz

montana
25-06-10, 22:54
Hi Caz and Sarah - thanks. Joining this forum is something i should have done a long time ago!

Hope i can get it all under control and start living properly

xx

bexy1970
25-06-10, 22:57
big hugs and a hello, my worst fear is cancer! as is most HA anx on here!!! so your soooo not on your own! honest tho keep on here and youll soon realise it is a mind thing and learn to cope!!! xx:hugs:

montana
25-06-10, 23:07
hi Bexy - thanks for your reply. Yes i am sure cancer is most peoples biggest fear. I just keep trying to tell myself that its anxiety and my husband is incredibly supportive. It just feels so real tho....
Thanks for your welcome

janni
25-06-10, 23:27
Hi Montana and welcome to the site. Sorry to hear you have had a struggle with health anxiety but you have support here and understanding.

randomworry
26-06-10, 11:22
hi montana it feels real because it is ............you are having pain but the pain is very likely to be due to stress and anxiety and nothing more. It like if someone was anxious and they started sweating would they think oh i have cancer why am i sweating?! they would just think im sweating because im scared/anxious.

Vixxy
26-06-10, 13:57
Anxiety plays havoc with the digestive system. A lot of us will suffer from IBS or stomach problems.
Does the pain feel like its coming on in waves? almost like childbirth contractions?
Is it worse at a particular time of day? After a meal, before bed, when you need to go to the toilet?
Have you changed your eating habits or eaten something that could have made you ill?

montana
26-06-10, 19:56
Thanks all for you welcome - yep just like contractions, Vixxy. Doc says its like a tension headache..............i dont know wot to think anymore but thanks for your kind support

x