JustBenn
28-06-10, 22:30
Fears and Symptoms I have experienced since age 14 onwards?
SORRY THIS IS SOO LONG!
HIV/AIDS/STD/ CHLAMYDIA/HARPIES
Paedophilia / Gay / Bisexual / Incest / Rape - Unwanted Perverted sexual thoughts
Schizophrenia Thoughts/ Fear of hearing voices / Hallucinating – fear of seeing and communicating with imaginary human
Bi Polar Disorder
Anal Cancer – because of Blood in stool
Scared about getting stomach ulcer
Breast Cancer – because of being fat and having man boobs.
Brain Tumour - because of headaches on the top, back and temple of my head.
I forget UN important things during the day.
Hernia
Hypochondria – health fear
Obsessive/Repeated Thinking or fear of my own thoughts – 2009 onwards
Repeated Checking and counting
Washing hands for at least 5 minutes or over. - Germs
Intrusive and Evil Thoughts
Anorexia - Obsessive about gaining more weight – Fear of eating too much – look bigger when looking in mirror – obsess about what I ate during the day, and have repeated thoughts on counting how many things I ate during the day. Often do this every day and think this like 6 times in 2 hours and the thought stays with me for 3 minutes at least. I stand in front of the mirror for about 6 minutes at least because I’m not sure if I look smaller. Even though that my clothes are now bigger because of exercise and diet.
Fear of losing my mind - getting mentally ill or losing control – going insane
Shaking, Trembling and facial twitching/ finger fiddling
Feeling hot then cold
Shortness and difficulty of breathing / Feeling restless/ panic makes me sweat lots and hot feeling around body.
Fear of watching scary videos incase of triggering schizophrenia.
Fear of keeping my eyes open in the dark. – My Room
Obsessive about my family’s welfare
Fear of not having children
Fear of my testicles not working
Fear and obsessing about having blood in my semen
Fear of blood clot in leg
Fear about low sperm amount
Fear of testicular problems – cancer- Tangled
Fear of Bladder Problems and kidney stones – because of Cloudy/Foamy Urination
Fear of going to sleep at night – because of hearing things just before drifting off to sleep and just before waking up. Random Mind Chatter – hypnagogia auditory (hypnagogic) hallucinations
Numb in areas of my body
Fear of being mentally immature – mental age of 10
Worrying about health and hygiene
'Electric shock' feelings (anywhere in the body)
Distorted vision
Suicidal feelings
Eye or brain tricks - Seeing Spots/Light Flashes/Black Things and seeing unknown things from the corner of my eyes.
Movements from the corner of my eyes
Optical Illusion – movements
Fear of being in a mental home – Fear of going to the doctors
Hard to concentrate on something when having anxiety
Sometimes it is hard to get hold of my thoughts. – I can’t think well when I am constantly worrying over and over about the same thing.
I can’t trust what I see because I don’t know if it’s real or not.
I need a lot of reassurance to get me through the worries
Fear and obsess about sleep eating disorder
Fear of torturing people
Fear of becoming a child abuser
Difficulty swallowing
Change in appetite
Startled very easily
Tired all the time
I Google my symptoms online which triggers even more worrying. I spend most times researching symptoms online/books and dictionaries
I joined loads of online forums and found that other people’s experiences help me get rid of the fears and phobias for a while. And often need reassurance
I am very aware of all my symptoms and I think there is something wrong with me. And I am not normal.
When in a panic mode, I often reassure myself I am normal in my head, I also sometimes whisper the word, “I’m Normal” Or tell myself not to worry e.g. “Don’t Worry” which sometimes helps.
Fear of puberty going wrong or fear of something abnormal stopping it.
Wet dreams - I used to have wet dreams and obsessed about it until i was told it was normal for teenagers. Before i knew it was normal for them to stop I used to go through some rituals.
Numbers – on the TV volume, I like even numbers and I usually like numbers from multiples of 5
Sensation – that i am falling of the bed or somone is pulling me backwords when i am asleep.
Hope my expirences help others :)
SORRY THIS IS SOO LONG!
HIV/AIDS/STD/ CHLAMYDIA/HARPIES
Paedophilia / Gay / Bisexual / Incest / Rape - Unwanted Perverted sexual thoughts
Schizophrenia Thoughts/ Fear of hearing voices / Hallucinating – fear of seeing and communicating with imaginary human
Bi Polar Disorder
Anal Cancer – because of Blood in stool
Scared about getting stomach ulcer
Breast Cancer – because of being fat and having man boobs.
Brain Tumour - because of headaches on the top, back and temple of my head.
I forget UN important things during the day.
Hernia
Hypochondria – health fear
Obsessive/Repeated Thinking or fear of my own thoughts – 2009 onwards
Repeated Checking and counting
Washing hands for at least 5 minutes or over. - Germs
Intrusive and Evil Thoughts
Anorexia - Obsessive about gaining more weight – Fear of eating too much – look bigger when looking in mirror – obsess about what I ate during the day, and have repeated thoughts on counting how many things I ate during the day. Often do this every day and think this like 6 times in 2 hours and the thought stays with me for 3 minutes at least. I stand in front of the mirror for about 6 minutes at least because I’m not sure if I look smaller. Even though that my clothes are now bigger because of exercise and diet.
Fear of losing my mind - getting mentally ill or losing control – going insane
Shaking, Trembling and facial twitching/ finger fiddling
Feeling hot then cold
Shortness and difficulty of breathing / Feeling restless/ panic makes me sweat lots and hot feeling around body.
Fear of watching scary videos incase of triggering schizophrenia.
Fear of keeping my eyes open in the dark. – My Room
Obsessive about my family’s welfare
Fear of not having children
Fear of my testicles not working
Fear and obsessing about having blood in my semen
Fear of blood clot in leg
Fear about low sperm amount
Fear of testicular problems – cancer- Tangled
Fear of Bladder Problems and kidney stones – because of Cloudy/Foamy Urination
Fear of going to sleep at night – because of hearing things just before drifting off to sleep and just before waking up. Random Mind Chatter – hypnagogia auditory (hypnagogic) hallucinations
Numb in areas of my body
Fear of being mentally immature – mental age of 10
Worrying about health and hygiene
'Electric shock' feelings (anywhere in the body)
Distorted vision
Suicidal feelings
Eye or brain tricks - Seeing Spots/Light Flashes/Black Things and seeing unknown things from the corner of my eyes.
Movements from the corner of my eyes
Optical Illusion – movements
Fear of being in a mental home – Fear of going to the doctors
Hard to concentrate on something when having anxiety
Sometimes it is hard to get hold of my thoughts. – I can’t think well when I am constantly worrying over and over about the same thing.
I can’t trust what I see because I don’t know if it’s real or not.
I need a lot of reassurance to get me through the worries
Fear and obsess about sleep eating disorder
Fear of torturing people
Fear of becoming a child abuser
Difficulty swallowing
Change in appetite
Startled very easily
Tired all the time
I Google my symptoms online which triggers even more worrying. I spend most times researching symptoms online/books and dictionaries
I joined loads of online forums and found that other people’s experiences help me get rid of the fears and phobias for a while. And often need reassurance
I am very aware of all my symptoms and I think there is something wrong with me. And I am not normal.
When in a panic mode, I often reassure myself I am normal in my head, I also sometimes whisper the word, “I’m Normal” Or tell myself not to worry e.g. “Don’t Worry” which sometimes helps.
Fear of puberty going wrong or fear of something abnormal stopping it.
Wet dreams - I used to have wet dreams and obsessed about it until i was told it was normal for teenagers. Before i knew it was normal for them to stop I used to go through some rituals.
Numbers – on the TV volume, I like even numbers and I usually like numbers from multiples of 5
Sensation – that i am falling of the bed or somone is pulling me backwords when i am asleep.
Hope my expirences help others :)