randomworry
05-07-10, 12:31
Well ill keep it short and sweet!
I am at rock bottom! no way did i think my life would turn out this way no way did i think i would end up at 26 years old a virgin, unemployed, crippled by fear of having undiagnosed cancer and living at home with few friends and the few i do have i avoid because im so darn depressed.
i guess the upside to this is that once you are so low the only way is up. I hang on to that belief.
And i am living proof that reassurance and checking only makes things worse so i hope to god that the rest of you stop before you end up like me. a wreck no good for myself or others.
Ive gone from thinking that i will get cancer in the future to thinking that i have undetected cancer and this has all come about through checking and reassurance.
I also feel bad because i blame myself and am angry for not following the therapy fully. No one understands how i feel and arguments with my mum are frequent because of my fears so the vicious cycle is huge.........it effects everyone!
anyway just had to do that bit of venting because if i do recover from this hell then at least i can remember where i am coming from.
Anyway ive booked an appointment with the shrink to start back on medication as it is clearly needed when im feeling like this.
I am at rock bottom! no way did i think my life would turn out this way no way did i think i would end up at 26 years old a virgin, unemployed, crippled by fear of having undiagnosed cancer and living at home with few friends and the few i do have i avoid because im so darn depressed.
i guess the upside to this is that once you are so low the only way is up. I hang on to that belief.
And i am living proof that reassurance and checking only makes things worse so i hope to god that the rest of you stop before you end up like me. a wreck no good for myself or others.
Ive gone from thinking that i will get cancer in the future to thinking that i have undetected cancer and this has all come about through checking and reassurance.
I also feel bad because i blame myself and am angry for not following the therapy fully. No one understands how i feel and arguments with my mum are frequent because of my fears so the vicious cycle is huge.........it effects everyone!
anyway just had to do that bit of venting because if i do recover from this hell then at least i can remember where i am coming from.
Anyway ive booked an appointment with the shrink to start back on medication as it is clearly needed when im feeling like this.