View Full Version : middle of the night...
Hi all
I have been woken from my sleep by this dreadful itching, but it's in one particlar place, on my left inside forearm.
Once I woke I went into full on sweating and shaking and complete 9 out of 10 panic attack, dizzy, bad stomach, the whole works... flushing all over. I am so worried that my mouth is going to swell up and I'm going to choke. I feel like I am having a full on allergic reaction to something and might have anaphylactic shock.
I went to sleep feeling pretty calm and positive. How does anxiety do this to you in your sleep? I'm so frightened. I know I pushed myself today, but why does it come out in me like this - if that's what it is?
Why is there no-one to talk to in the middle of the night for people like us? This is when we need reassurance but who can you call?
The more I tried to stay in bed and do my relaxation exercises and visualisations the worse I got. I had even taken a little bit of a sleeping tablet, and hardly ever in my life remember waking up once I have done that. My stomach is horrendous. Pure acid and the big D.
I am so fed up with dealing with weird symptoms like this, not feeling sure they are anxiety, always wondering if there is some physical cause. Anyone without anxiety who woke up like this would just assume there was something wrong and call a doctor. But doctors don't come out anyway any more do they....
Roll on the morning and a little normality.
:(:(:(
fee
xx
ItWillPass
20-02-06, 03:42
I get that arm itching thing a lot also. And of course, I also get scared that I am having some sort of allergic reaction. It all makes sense... you had the itch, then panicked. Panic attacks at night are the hardest to handle. They seem so intense... They feel like how I would imagine dying to feel. I dont have any wise words of wisdom... other than just to let you know you are not alone... Try to put hydracordisone on your arm... it will help with the itching.
__________________________________________________ __________________________________
"I hope you never fear those mountains in the distance, never settle for the path of least resistance... When you get the chance to sit it out or dance, I hope you dance"
"This too shall pass..."
Thanks Iwp!
I was just starting to think (having been up for 2 hours now and reading every post on every bit of the site!) that no-one else in the world had ever manifested the itching thing!! I've been struggling with the itching for a few weeks, but it wasn't panicking me... it's so hard to get a grip in the middle of the night and believe it really isn't anything serious going on!
Health anxiety is so exhausting!
Thanks for answering me!
fee
xx
Hi Fee
Sounds like a pretty horrible night for you. It is true that it can be pretty isolating being awake at night with no one to call or to talk to. I used to regularly be up at that time of night but I have to force myself to go to bed earlier now I have to get up for the clinic.
How are you feeling this morning?
If you are desperate to talk to someone The Samaritans (http://www.samaritans.org) are available 24 hours and are not just there for people who are feeling suicidal.
I had some weird dreams last night and am feeling a bit down this morning, but maybe that's related to going to the clinic this morning. Anyway, I hope you have a better day. It's pouring of rain again here today.
Karen xx
Morning Karen
I still feel lousy and just don't understand it... I had managed to convince myself that the rash had been made worse by getting cold yesterday but honestly in the night it was dreadful - well it still is, little itchy spots all over my legs, bright red....
I can't believe people have to put up with it but apparently 'hives' which can be caused by all sorts of things, from allergies to stress to infections are really really common. I just have to learn to cope with it i expect. I didn't know you could itch that much though!!!
If it weren't for that I would be ok - it's just the fear of it spreading or affecting my throat that worries me.
I have counselling this morning - maybe she can advise me what i can do. Just feel like I want to be put in a white rooms, all cotton, with nothing except mineral water and organic fruit and veg to eat so i can find out if something in particular is causing it!!
Exhausted and tormented of Brighton:(
Hope you are ok hun xxxxxxxx
fee
xx
fee you are sooo right health anxiety is soooo exausting, ended up in casualty yesterday i was so afraid of the symtoms. still not convinced they havent missed something or not tested me because they always put it down to anxiety.
you are not alone god i wish it would end
jackie
Aww hun - everything seems worse in the dark doesn't it (except agoraphobia in my case - if we were nearer we could go out for midnight walks and deal with all our problems at the same time)!!
Do you feel any better this morning??
Piglet xx
"Supposing a tree fell down, Pooh, when we were underneath it?" said Piglet.
"Supposing it didn't," said Pooh after careful thought.
Hi Jackie
I have been to A&E with the heart palps/pains etc several times, although not for years now - I hope that's a comfort to you! In my 30s it happened loads, I would be up all night... It's very frightening but it does pass and all the exercises you can find on here really do work eventually - although I do take beta-blockers which stopped the ectopic beats.
I hope you are feeling a little better - you are definitely not alone with those symptoms!
Take care xxxx
fee
xx
Hi Piglet
I feel a little better than I did in the night of course, but i just wish I could work out why this is happening or what I can do about it. Who knew itching could be so awful... I think it's the trying to work out what might be causing it that is sending me potty as well....
I hope this counsellor this morning knows her onions!!!
How are you today? Yes it would be nice to live nearby - that hippy commune is starting sound pretty good to me! lol
xxxxxx
fee
xx
hippy comun, first i heard of it. count me in, hope you all like kids!
jackie
Hi Fee,
I have experienced some scary nights with all sorts of symptoms from cold sweats to bright flashing lights, although not the itching or spots.
But Karen, is right, ring the Samaritans on 08457 90 90 90 just to help calm you down. I have done that in the past, as well as ringing NHS Direct! Both 24/7 services.
Did you ever get to the bottom of these spots - was it scabies or not and what treatment are you having?
Ray xx
Ray
And when you get the choice to sit it out or dance, I hope you dance.
~Mark Sanders and Tia Sillers
fee with the scrtching do you have sweating before it?
jackie
Hi Fee,
Big hugs mate, aww poor you, sounds like you had a horrible night. Night panics are awful.
I hope you're feeling better now and that your counselling goes ok today.
Thinking of you.
Lisa x
Hi everyone and thanks for the messages!
I am still terribly itchy and anxious, the counselling session was just an initial one with the Community Health Nurse - but it was good to have someone to offload on and she is going to try and find out my status in relation to getting CBT and low cost support - I will see her again next Monday. I had a good old sob, which was probably good - I am full of grief about sarah and anger about waiting for this biopsy and fear about the future... It's not surprising I'm in such a state - I can feel this bad normally lol!!!
Ray - thanks for that - the Doc said that as the treatment didn't work it wasn't a scabies related allergy - although I remember you said your brother took ages to get rid of it, so it's one more thing I am still wondering about - whether to try another treatment - but the Doc says no.... and I'm trying to trust the Doc (hard as it is!!!). I have phoned the samaritans in the past but to be honest coming on here and offloading works better for me - thank goodness I have this site! You are all so wonderful and there is usually at least one person around!
Jackie - the rash does seem to come with sweating I must admit... there are so many things (including stress) that can cause urticaria/hives I just don't know what to think! I know it will pass eventually but I'm so stressed out at the moment it's hard to relax...
Lucy - I'm afraid of all medications including Piriton - I kept looking at it in the night but couldn't get myself to risk it lol! How stupid is that!! I had taken a little bit of a sleeper and was afraid they would react, but I have taken a little bit now... Hopefully I will sleep this afternoon!!
I think we definitely need to set up a home for worn out panickers! We could skip the hippy bit!! The middle of the night is so lonely....
Thanks Lisa - counselling went ok as far as it went - I'm just gonna pop over to see how you are doing hun xxxxx
I am a right old mess at the moment, but maybe I need to fall apart so I can put myself back together better than I was?!!!
Thank you all for caring xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx:D:D
fee
xx
Hi Fee,
I'm glad the counselling went ok, a good sob often helps. I hope you can get some CBT it does really help. It cured me totally the first time I had it, this time is proving harder mind you.
You're not a mess, just struggling with alot of things, but I do believe one day you will be better than you ever were before.
I hope you feel better after a nap.
Love and hugs,
Lisa x
Hi Fee, I woke up one morning with a rash on my inside forearm, where I'd been scratching. Turned out I had a touch of high blood pressure, the day after it was back to normal again. I have a habit of getting high blood pressure & temperature when I have panic attacks. I've got used to it now. There's nothing they can give me because it only seems to happen when I have panic attacks, its nothing life-threatening that I need medication for. If you are worried, go see your GP. I have a nurse at my GP's & she's really reassuring & checks little things out for me like that when I'm worried.
Hi Fee
The counselling session sounds positive and it would be good to get some CBT going sooner rather than later. The system is so frustrating at times.
<b id="quote">quote:</b id="quote"><table border="0" id="quote"><tr id="quote"><td class="quote" id="quote">I am a right old mess at the moment, but maybe I need to fall apart so I can put myself back together better than I was?!!!
<div align="right">Originally posted by feege - 20 February 2006 : 15:21:31</div id="right">
</td id="quote"></tr id="quote"></table id="quote">
I often think that about myself. Maybe I needed to hit rock bottom before I could start to drag myself back up again. I certainly had hit rock bottom.
Hope you manage to have a good nap this afternoon.
Karen xx
Thanks lisa and karen!
I think the antihistamines really knocked me out for an hour!!!! Still feel a bit itchy but no bad reaction so will try and take a bit more and regularly which is what the doctor told me to do 2 weeks ago ([:I][:I]).
I do feel really dopey though - and that's on a kiddie dose!!
Thanks Lesley - fortunately my BP has been pretty good lately, but I do get very hot a lot (it's me age love lol!!!).
hugs xxxxx
fee
xx
Hi fee,
Glad you got some sleep and are ok with the antihistamines.
I only take the ones that are non drowsy thankfully - oh and I have to remember to avoid grapefruit while on the damn things.
Hope you have a good evening, I have to go and make hubby a steak and kidney pie now (yuk - the things I do even though I don't eat meat!).
Lisa x
Hi Fee
Wow! I could do with those antihistamines if they knock you out :D. Which ones did you use? I found it difficult to sleep last night having taken 2 sleeping pills (I know I'm only meant to take one [:O]).
Karen xx
lol karen - don't reckon it would work on you - was only piriton!!!
I'm just very sensitive!
[|)][|)]
fee
xx
Oh that's a shame [Duh!]. I think I'm addicted to the sleeping pills but it is the least of my worries at present.
One day I know I'll need to get myself off them.
Karen xx
hi everyone
I didn't know which thread to post on tonight lol!! I didn't recognise the board since Lisa and I are not at the top - very confusing!
I still feel a bit dopey but have done some more ironing and been writing the home page for the website... it's very hard to do - the site is about to go up with not very good basically just test info on...
I'm really really hot and itchy again and somebody mentioned about sweating so I thought about hot flushes and googled menopause and, guess what? Every single solitary smptom I have could be down to the menopause (obviously exacerbated by all the stress and the ME etc...).
I found that a great comfort - because hopefully one day it will end!! However it doesn't help me get through tonight, which I am dreading.... but who knows maybe I'll sleep - I wasn't worried last night and I didn't...
Humph - I can honestly say turning 50 was the worst thing I ever did (better than the alternatives obviously ;)).
My mum has offered to buy me a new duvet, cos we bought one for her and I think I'll let her do it - mine is 21 years old (oh no I think I'm repeating myself!!!!). It might help...
I think I need to get non-drowsy antihistamines, this is ridiculous, I'm so tired I can hardly think....
I hope you are all ok tonight xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx
fee
xx
Hi Fee,
I hope your evening has been ok and that you're feeling better than you were earlier.
I hope you sleep well tonight, you must be pretty tired.
Thinking of you.
Night night,
Lisa x
Hi Fee,
I didn't see your post there, we were posting at the same time!
Well done for the ironing and doing the website.
The menopuase doesn't sound like much fun [}:)] Lol.
I hope you feel better Fee and have a better night.
Night,
Love Lisa x
he he he rofl rofl
we've all come on at the exact same time haven't we - how confusing for my tired mid-life brain cell lol
xxxxxxx
fee
xx
Hi Fee
I know what you mean about being confused when your thread is not top of the section lol! I was the only one posting in Depression for months and when there was a new thread it seemed very strange [^].
Well done for getting the info for the website done. When will it go online? Are the others you mentioned before adding material to it too?
I can understand your relief at believing the symptoms could partly be due to the menopause. There are natural remedies etc that could help with this but I don't want to send you off Googling again :D.
Agree that it would be good to let your mum buy you a new duvet.
<b id="quote">quote:</b id="quote"><table border="0" id="quote"><tr id="quote"><td class="quote" id="quote">I think I need to get non-drowsy antihistamines, this is ridiculous, I'm so tired I can hardly think....</td id="quote"></tr id="quote"></table id="quote">
I get like that with my sleeping pills, the only difference being they are meant to make me sleep and often I don't feel sleepy. However, after writing a couple of very embarrassing and cringe-worthy messages whilst under the influence of the pills I've decided it is best to avoid writing anything once I've taken the pills!
I hope you do sleep well tonight.
Karen xx
Hee hee. I tried to just sneak on and say goodnight, that will teach me. Only joking :D Once I'm on though I kind of feel I have to reply to everyones post to make it fair and then wait for replies if poeple are online and in the process of replying and then say night, it's mad really! Well I am mad.
Seriously though, I hope you feel better soon Fee and have a good nights sleep [|)].
Night,
Lisa x
nomorepanic
20-02-06, 22:00
The best way of seeing all posts is using "active topics" and then use the pull-down menu to select a time frame.
You won't miss any then.
Nicola
Oh thanks Nic!!!
I never use websites properly - too busy rabbiting[:I]
Hope you are ok xxxx
fee
xx
Thanks Nic,
I already do that. What I meant was Fee and I were posting on this thread at the same time and I didn't realise she was posting as I wasn't logged on [Oops!].
Lisa x
Night all x
nomorepanic
20-02-06, 22:24
Ha ha - I see. What are you all like eh?
Too eager to post and over-lapping each other.
It is fab that you are all supporting each other and I love reading all the replies.
Nicola
Yes Nic, what are we all like indeed! No don't answer that Lol.
It's funny although it's a public forum you don't realise people actually read the stuff we waffle on about here [Duh!] - but it seems we keep the troops entertained at times [:o)]. I agree that we are all a great support to each other, I have made some very good friends here who I hope will be friends for a long long time - aww I feel another group hug coming on.
Thanks for your part in all this Nic, without you none of us would have made such good friends here :)
Love Lisa x - who really is going to bed very soon x
Morning all..
Hoorah - I slept ok!! Don't feel quite so bad today and I'm reading Allan Carr's Easyway to Stop Smoking....
I am very interested in the relationship between smoking and anxiety. Not enough effort has gone into the fact that anxiety sufferers so often smoke. I have read his book before (2 years ago) and it worked for 3 months. I think he has got it right. Not sure if I can do it though - I reckon if I could I would also be able to beat all my other anxieties....
Off to make loads of phone calls xxxxxxxxxxxx
fee
xx
Hiya hun :D
Love Piglet xx
Hi Fee,
Glad you slept well and feel better today. I hope the smoking book can help you.
Thinking of you.
Lisa x
Hi everyone!
I haven't been able to get on the site all afternoon, tried quite a few times but piglet informed me that Nic's story was in the Mail today!
I was going to post a success story, but I'll just put it here for now....
I went swimming!! Chris has membership of a gym and kept trying to persuade me to go and so I did today - he can take a guest free this week.
I drove there on my own which was scary enough, then he had an appt and just said - well off you go - there's the changing rooms! So I wandered around for a bit aimlessly nearly panicking and then went to the reception and they were so so nice! Everyone was really friendly, and there were lots of wrinklies around (wrinklier than me even!!) and a nice girl showed me round. I explained I have panic/anxiety/ME and she offered to come down to the changing rooms with me so I could just try the pool/jacuzzi - but I went on my own!! Had a little swim and jacuzzi and came out (got a little tense as I started to breathe hard and was tired).
Then I sat and had a drink in the cafe/bar and everyone spoke to me and encouraged me - it was fantastic!!
I talked to them about joining and the gym manager came and had a word and said we could work out a programme of very gentle graded exercise together - he was really nice and very knowledgeable!
I'm going to try and go again this week. It's a bit expensive but I think it would be absolutely fantastic for me to go there regularly.
I'm really exhausted tonight of course. I will have to see how it affects me - but my skin has been fine, and my ear/dizziness is the same too so that's brillian! I must be tired though cos my throat hurts (tension hurting I think not sore hopefully).
I can't believe I did it!
I hope you are all ok - will try and have a look but I am flopping on my laptop now lol!!!
love to everyone xxxx
fee
xx
WOW FEE! WELL DONE:D
You did brilliantly and I am soo proud of you. I'd love to be able to swim and maybe one day I will take swimming classes or something but I am not brave enough to go alone. I think you are so brave.
I'm so glad you've had a good day. Is the gym near you? It would be good to go regularly if you could.
Karen xx
Thanks Karen!
The gym is quite near - and easy to park and I think I am going again tomorrow if my throat is ok![:O][8D]
I'm not a very good swimmer - i can't cope with big pools, I just like splashing about really and love the jacuzzi! I used to like saunas but now panic sometimes (how boring!)...
My mum has offered to pay for me to join which is so lovely of her... but I don't want to waste her money by joining and not going so I can't make my mind up... I can't get over how friendly everyone was and how unintimidating (once I got in there!).
You will have to come and learn here!!!
Feel a little sore throatish tho.... fingers crossed its nothing.
Will be off to bed in a minute i think! Nite all xxxxxxxx
fee
xx
Hi Fee,
Well done for the swimming, that's brilliant and does deserve a success story! I'm not being negative but be careful on the ME front and don't do too much too soon and don't increase what you do for a while even then, I'm sure you know all this Lol. I really miss swimming but no chance with my breathing, have to build up my walking first anyway.
I love the jacuzzi too, I don't like saunas as the heat is dry but love steam rooms, although I'm not meant to use them because of the lymphodema. Ooh I need a day at a health spa I think - a nice jacuzzi and then a massage.
I hope you sleep well, clever Aunty Fee [8D],
Night,
Lisa x
Hi Fee
It would be great for you to go again tomorrow if you feel up to it. I quite like splashing about in the pool and can just about manage with a float of some kind [^].
I too love the jacuzzi! Not into saunas though, not because I panic but I just don't like them.
How generous of your mum to offer to pay for you to join. Is it very expensive? Perhaps you could go a couple of times and then decide. It does sound friendly and welcoming. I've found some gyms to be a bit intimidating in the past. It is a shame it is not a bit nearer.
<b id="quote">quote:</b id="quote"><table border="0" id="quote"><tr id="quote"><td class="quote" id="quote">You will have to come and learn here!!!</td id="quote"></tr id="quote"></table id="quote">
I'd love to but it is quite a journey for me and depends on cost etc whether it would be worthwhile. It's ok if it is possible to pay for individual sessions. We could possibly meet up some time!
Hope you sleep well Fee.
How is the smoking book going? I think it is great that you are giving it a try.
Karen xx
Morning Fee
I hope you are ok this morning and that you are able to get to the gym today.
Good luck for the dentist later.
Speak to you when I get home later.
Karen xx
morning guys
I slept the sleep of the dead! I do feel very tired so i think i'd better not do the swimming thing again till tomorrow! What with the dentist and all! Thanks Lisa - I do need reminding it's true, this is my problem!
Throat is still a bit sore too, so I'm going to take it very easy....
Hope you are all ok xxxxxxxxxxxxxx
fee
xx
Yesterday was a brilliant day but like you say best not to overdo it and build it up gradually. Such good exercise!!!!
Catch ya later.
Piglet xxxx
"Supposing a tree fell down, Pooh, when we were underneath it?" said Piglet.
"Supposing it didn't," said Pooh after careful thought.
Hi Fee,
I'm glad you slept well, no doubt the exercise helped there. I'm glad you're going to take it sensibly and not go again today.
I hope the dentist (hygeinest wasn't it?) went ok.
If this forum goes any slower I may stop using it for a while as it can take me half an hour to do one post, and my back isn't thanking me for sitting here that long at once. Seems ok at the moment though touch wood, although earlier I couldn't get on at all.
Thinking of you.
Lisa x
Hi Lisa - thanks hun!
I am a stress head today... Got my endoscopy appt on 9th March[:O][:O] I know I want it but I don't WANT it lol!!!!
Going to the hygienist was an ordeal too, drove there on my own and i hate it - the noise, the open mouth for 40 mins (yes my teeth are that disgusting[V]). Feel exhausted now and a bit tearful...
Mum is feeling ill again so I had to go round with a few bits for her on the way back, her chest is awful.
The cold is really getting to me too, it really hurts. I'm longing for the summer.
The website is up like2like.com (well i think it is - or will be over the next 24 hours) and i still haven't re-written the home page and am not happy with it.
I think I need more sleep - although I slept so well last night! How on earth did I ever go to work? That's all I think every day!
Hope you're ok - will go look now xxxxxxxxxx
fee
xx
Hi Fee,
Sorry you're feeling stressed today. I know what you mean about wanting appts and not wanting them at the same time. At least you've had an endoscopy before and know what to expect, although I know that doesn't always help but I personally think it's better that way than the complete unknown.
Well done for getting to the hygeinest too, I've never seen one of those but I hate even the dentist cleaning my teeth.
Is it cold today then, I haven't been out yet. The cold can make my hands hurt a bit but I'd rather have cold any day, I hate summer! Lol.
Great news about the website!
Hope you feel better later, big hugs.
Lisa x
Hi Fee
Well done with coping with the hygienist. It is not a pleasant experience.
I know what you mean about the endosopy appointment. It is like my op - I want to get it over and done with but am not looking forward to it. I haven't got a date yet though. At least you know when it will be now and there is not too long to wait.
I think it was probably wise to give the gym a miss today. I have a sore throat too and keep thinking I might have caught this cold that's going around.
Great that the site is up and running. You've done so well to get that done.
Karen xx
Morning all...
I was quite proud of myself yesterday. I think it was all very stressful! The rash came back up in the evening and my tummy was upset in the night (no kidding it really is catching on-line lol) and still doesn't feel right this morning at all...
I'm going back to bed for a while, I feel very achey and tired..
I hope you guys are ok xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx
fee
xx
Paddington
23-02-06, 11:50
hi,fee.gosh reading about your night panics,itching etc and other peoples messages to you is astounding.i get them too!wake up feeling as tho i'm drowning ,gasping 4 air and the pins and needles start and my vision goes weird,IT IS TERRIFYING!I have to take valium,but i'm so convinced i'm dying that i almost dont care and you know what,that is what helps me!i think ok i'm dying it will be quick[i am by now crying out 4 help etc]but giving in to it stops it.mary weeks said in the book i had,once a panic attack has reached it's worst point it cant get any worse[didn't paraphrase that very well,sorry]i do feel 4 you i really do,at least sharing our tales of terror to each other helps a wee bit,and as others have said pick up a phone.there should be a phone service 4 panic attack sufferers,i agree.What a help that would be.take care.Mary-Rose.x
Hi Fee,
I hope you're feeling better later mate, thinking of you.
You were right to be proud of yourself for yesterday. The website looks great, I had a good read. It made me shiver reading Mark's words, it was so beautiful and clear how much they love each other. The picture of them is lovely too, Sarah is so beautiful. I really hope this campaign will find a suitable donor, she deserves it so much.
Love and hugs,
Lisa x
Hi Mary - thanks for that! It is an enormous help to share with other people and not feel so isolated! I used to use nitrazapam years ago (occasionally have again just recently because of the enormous stress of my current situation) but usually I manage to ride it out, but it is exhausting and I agree an anxiety helpline would be fantastic - maybe one day it will happen (the Samaritans are wonderful but more geared to depression). Just offloading my feelings on here in the night, and reading other people's posts reminds me that I can get through it and there is usually someone else around (even if they are in America and it is the middle of the day for them lol!). I hope you find the site helps you as much!
Hi Lisa hun - I'm glad you liked the site - it is still a work in progress as i said, i think the homepage could be better and we will be developing it. Our 'launch' has not been confirmed yet which is a bit disappointing, but we have some time before we need a donor...
Hi Karen - thanks for your post too - I did right not to go to the gym I really don't feel very well today, sore throat and stuff. I went back to sleep today and woke at 11.45 which is absolutely unheard of!!! It'll be time for my siesta in a minute lol!!! My tummy is not right either. I'm just going to take it easy today - so so glad to be off work, especially looking at the snow falling.
I feel like this is doing me good today. Sitting in bed with my laptop - all warm and cosy! I don't know how I am going to get back to work, but I have to hope that after the endoscopy and coming off gluten I will actually feel a bit better. I feel like I am unwinding at last so maybe I will feel better even if I'm not Coeliac.
Thank you all again for being here for me!
xxxx
fee
xx
Fee I just went and had a look on www.like2like.com and I think you have done a super job with it.
Sarah and Mark are two very very fine people!
The very best of luck with it all.
Love Piglet xx
Hi Fee,
I hope you feel better later mate, thinking of you.
Love and a big hug,
Lisa x
Thanks lisa - you too xxxxxxxxxxxx
Thanks Piglet - I have put something on the Misc board - let me know what you think?
hugs xxxxxxxxx
fee
xx
We think it's great and are so proud of you for all your hard work towards this even though you are struggling too. Go Fee! :D
Lisa x
Fee regarding the post :D:D:D:D:D
Big squeeze.
Love Piglet xx
Thanks so much lisa and piglet xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx
Thanks for helping me do it piglet xxxxxxx
Fee xxxxxx
www.like2like.com
Hi Fee
Must be something catching with us feeling under the weather today! I too have been in bed most of the day and feel like I am coming down with something. Just feeling really tired, headachy and like I have cold symptoms starting. There was no snow to watch here though - not that I saw anyway :D.
I did manage to get up and have a bath eventually this afternoon, and then nip out to the supermarket for some veg for dinner.
I agree with what others have said - the site is great and reading about Mark and Sarah was so heartrending. I hope it generates a lot of interest. Something like this would persuade me to consider joining the register but I don't think I would be accepted at present. My weight is (I think) now above the minimum but I am still recovering. Maybe it is something I'd look at when I am better.
Haven't seen your other post yet but I think what you are doing is brilliant.
I think a day chilling out and resting is just what you need. I hope you are feeling better this evening.
Karen xx
Thanks Karen hun..
Sorry to hear you're under the weather too (how appropriate does that feel!!) - it's especially frustrating when things have been going so well - I really feel much more positive at the moment than I have for ages and all the positive vibes from the website are so uplifting!!
I have been receiving messages all day, from the site and from the email i sent out and I'm shattered and really do feel a bit fluish, but hopefully I'll fight it off by tomorrow, fingers crossed....
I STILL haven't got my stickers for my journal and I really want them but keep forgetting... I have written so much in there and would love to pretty it up!!
Hope you are ok this evening hun xxxxxxxxxxxxx
Fee xxxxxx
www.like2like.com
Hi Fee
There are so many bugs etc going around at the moment and one of them just causes tiredness and a loss of energy so it could partly be that. I think it is more likely though that you are just worn out from everything you have been doing and hopefully today's rest has helped.
I'm still tired but this could be the migraine and the medication I take for it.
I meant to mention in my last post that there is a No Panic helpline (http://www.nopanic.org.uk/menu.htm) as well as The Samaritans. It isn't a 24 hours helpline but is another source of support.
Am so glad you are getting such positive support for the website and the campaign. I hope a match can be found from people coming forward because of it.
Karen xx
Hi Karen
Thanks hon - I didn't know about the nopanic helpline - I must have missed that - there's still so much available here that I haven't had time to look at!
Sounds like we're in pretty much the same boat tonight - i feel really grotty... I hope we both feel better tomorrow!
Speak later (Chris is here atm reading my easyway to give up smoking book!)
xxxxx
Fee xxxxxx
www.like2like.com
Hi Fee
Sorry you're feeling grotty too. It is so cold out too and I'm now huddled in bed with a hot water bottle lol! Mind you, I didn't have the heating on and so have just turned it on which will probably help.
How is the stopping smoking going? I think it is brilliant that you are giving this a go.
Karen xx
Hi Fee,
I just posted on my thread to say I couldn't get on yours and suddenly I can get in and it's gone quick again.
I hope you're feeling better this evening, thinking of you.
I used the No Panic helpline about three years ago (That's no panic not to be confused with no more panic Lol). I used to be a memeber of theirs aswell and used to get their newsletters in the post. The helpline was very useful in the early days of understanding panic. They also have an emergency recorded message after 10pm that tells you how to cope.
I hope you sleep well Fee and feel better tomorrow.
Night night,
Love and hugs,
Lisa x
Hi Fee
How are you feeling this morning?
I hope you slept well.
Karen xx
Just saying hello mate.
Love Piglet xx:)
Hi Fee,
Just to say I'm thinking of you. I know you're feeling sad today.
Big (((hug))),
Love Lisa x
Hi all
Glad to see the site up and running. I'm not very chatty just really sad on finding out my beardie, annie, was put to sleep this morning.
Have a friend coming round shortly. All I want to do is sleep at the moment and my tummy is still upset anyway.
Hope you are all ok xxxxxxx
Fee xxxxxx
www.like2like.com
Hi Fee,
I'm so sorry about Annie, I won't go on about it here as I said it all in an email earlier but I do know what you're going through and how you're feeling.
I hope you feel better later and that seeing your friend helps a bit.
Thinking of you,
Love and hugs,
Lisa x
Aww (((Big Hug))) Fee.
I was so sorry to hear about Annie and it is natural to go through a period of grief. Annie will be with you forever in your heart.
Hope your friend is a comfort to you this evening.
Love
Karen xx
Fee
Just wanted to add that it might help to read My dog Rocky...RIP (http://www.nomorepanic.co.uk/showthread.php?t=7357).
Thinking of you tonight.
Karen xx
Still thinking of you Fee.
Night night, I hope you are ok and sleep well.
Love and hugs,
Lisa x
Thank you so much for your kind words and thoughts.
I am feeling very very sad still and flat. I have been out this evening with a friend who had two beardies and we used to walk together every day for years and who loved annie.
I have got a bit drunk so I probably won't say much else right now. I just hope I can sleep ok!!
I hope you are all ok....
love n hugs xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx
Fee xxxxxx
www.like2like.com
Night Fee.
I hope you sleep well.
Thinking of you.
Karen xx
Hi fee-
I read your post and then your profile. I'm the same age as you, and for a while was getting mega hot flashes and night sweats. But surprisingly to me they were accompanied by severe anxiety. That was just too much, and after exhausting every herbal and natural remedy available I caved and went on hormone replacement therapy. It's been much much better since.
I have also suffered from itchiness and finally found out that itchiness is also a symptom of menopause (or perimenopause). Another thing they don't tell you! For a while I had skin issues all over - face (rosacea), eyes, arms, knees. Dermatologist didn't help. I went to an accupuncturist here in NY who specializes in skin issues and he prescribed these Chinese herbs - took a few weeks but it worked. Who knows, it might have gone away by itself but we'll never know, will we?
I hope you're feeling better.
-Michelle
michelle
Hi Michelle
Yes, I have in the last week or two just discovered it is yet another peri-menopausal symptom - hey what isn't!!! Trouble is with anxiety and ME and all the stress I am under at the moment I never know what's what!
Morning to everyone...
I am more than a little delicate this morning having had a couple of drinks last night - had a kind of wake with my friend last night - but i did manage to sleep more or less. I may have to go back to bed though! [:I]
Hope you are all well xxxxxxxxxxxxxxx
Fee xxxxxx
www.like2like.com
Glad you are not suffering too many effects from last night! It's fine to have a restful day to recover lol!
Karen xx
Hi Karen
Yes, considering what happened I don't feel too bad - I am supposed to be going out today to buy a swimming costume so I can swim again this week (do NOT want to have to do it in a bikini again[:I] but not sure where to go!
I'm gonna log off and try and get another hour's sleep...
See you later xxxx
Fee xxxxxx
www.like2like.com
Hi Fee
Are you going into the town centre? Some of the supermarkets do some good swimwear. Or perhaps M&S or BHS. I could do with a new costume too if I ever go swimming. In fact, by the time summer comes I'll need a whole new wardrobe because none of my clothes from last year will fit anymore. Not sure that is too good though.
Hope you manage to get some further sleep. Speak again later.
Karen xx
Fee big hug about yesterday - so sorry!
You could try sports shops for a cossie or I always get mine from Next as they do some nice ones.
Love Piglet xx
How are you today Piglet?
Karen xx
Hi Fee,
I hope you're feeling ok now and not too delicate.
Good luck if you go cossie shopping.
Thinking of you.
Lisa x
Hi all
got up eventually...[:I] and took mum shopping with me - no costumes anywhere at all... Should have gone to a bigger store I think. But mum bought me a new duvet like the one she got cos she said it was so fantastic! I don't know what's going on everyone keeps being so nice to me lately - I'm not used to it!
Found a lovely little tea room in Hove (called Serenity!) and they do gluten free cakes - which will be fab if I get diagnosed wih Coeliac's!
I think I'm gonna flake out again. I'm liking this life of leisure!!!
Hope you are all ok xxxxxxxxxxx
Fee xxxxxx
www.like2like.com
Hi Fee,
Well done for managing shopping, it was nice of your Mum to buy you a new duvet. My new duvet is going on the bed tonight too.
People are being nice to you because you're a lovely person and you deserve pampering :).
The tea room sounds lovely.
I hope you're having a nice rest now.
Lisa x
Hi Fee
Sounds like a good day for you. I think a lot of the big Department stores now have swimming costumes in stock so maybe you might need to try one of those.
Have you decided to join the gym?
The coffee shop sounds lovely too.
Don't know what's wrong with us all tonight. I've just been for a nap too.
Karen xx
Hi Fee,
Hope you're ok.
Night, sleep well.
Lisa x
hello!
I just watched Captain Corelli's Mandolin... aaaah[8D]
I don't know what's going on I just keep falling asleep lol! Don't feel ill [:O] just so sleepy, although throat is a little sore.... oh well I'm just going with it!
Thanks lisa[:I] but i don't know what i've done to deserve people fussing over me lately... but it's very nice!
Karen - i haven't decided to join the gym yet, I'm really not sure... I'm going to go there on Monday and discuss a month's trial - well providing I can stay awake long enough to buy a costume! I know I'll have to go to M&S or something but I hate department stores...
Crikey I'm going to nod off again in a minute![8D]
Will pop in to your places to see the latest - hope you're ok xxxxxx
Fee xxxxxx
www.like2like.com
Hi Fee,
Captain who? Lol. Sorry but never heard of that! Lol. Think I must have led a sheltered life as I haven't hear of Piglets giddy goat either.
Anyway just saying nighty night. I hope you sleep well and feel less tired tomorrow.
Lisa x
Ah well I've heard of the film but not seen it!
Fee - I have the opposite problem in that I feel exhausted but can't sleep, even with my sleeping pills. I do feel very tired though.
I didn't realise you had a problem with big department stores. I am fine with things like that as long as they are not really crowded - like at Christmas etc.
Hope you a feeling a bit better and less tired tomorrow.
Karen xx
:D:D:D:D:D:D:D:D:D:D
I slept in a fairy bed of goose down![8D][8D]
My new duvet is heavenly - it was reduced from £199 to £90 which I still thought was a lot but my goodness it was worth every penny!
I feel really ok today![:O][:O][8D]
I think I have made some kind of breakthrough in my thinking, thanks to this site and the support I have had from friends lately. I don't think in my whole life I have ever stopped bullying myself and punishing myself. I have never let myself rest without mentally saying "you should do this you should do that, what's the matter with you, why don't you do more etc" which has led to "so what is wrong with you, why are you so tired, is it this is it that" which is exhausting..... and DAH DAH.... exhaustion and health anxiety!
I don't know what, if any, difference this will make, but I am fed up with trying to be superwoman and am going to be lazywoman instead for a while!!! I actually really have enjoyed just resting this last couple of days and I needed it so much!
I can't thank you all enough for all the support I have had here! I think I'll go back to bed again now!!!:D:D:D
Lisa - not a Nick Cage fan then? I really like him - it was a lovely soppy story!
Piglet - been meaning to say - I was always called a giddy goat as a kid too - perhaps it is more of a northern thing eh?!! How are you hun?
Karen - I'm not sure I have a problem as such with big stores, I just never have liked them. But my anxiety is quite generalised and can happen anywhere pretty much - I like to be able to get out of places quickly!! I'm not really surprised you can't sleep at the moment you are making so many changes and our bodies do like routine! It will probably take some time for regular sleep patterns to settle in!
Hope you are all ok today xxxxxxxxxx
Fee xxxxxx
www.like2like.com
Hi Fee,
Glad you slept well. My new duvet was lovely too, although I can't have feathers in mine.
I'm glad you feel ok today.
Well done with the thinking breakthrough, that's great. I think most women feel guilty for resting too much, it's natural. I rest more than I used to but I find resting boring Lol. Not only that my ME docs keep telling me too much rest is as bad as too much activity. I'm glad the resting is helping you though.
I don't even know who Nick Cage is, well I've heard of him and know he's an actor but I couldn't picture him. I'm not into films at all though.
Hope you have a good day fee - a nice lazy sunday afternoon.
Lisa x
Morning Fee,
Ooh the duvet sounds heavenly - I have a single one upstairs on one of the kids beds and when me and the youngest had our sleepover week in half term I had that one. I had forgotten how comfy they are because they seem to wrap softly around you.
My mum had two old fashioned eiderdowns coverted into this duvet somewhere about 10 years ago. Infact I almost wish she had kept them as the old paisly covered eiderdowns as that is a lovely look for bedrooms, all Cath Kidston ish. If you haven't heard of Cath Kidston have a look at her website - its delicious nostalgia gone mad and certainly along the lines of how I like interiors too - mind you I have always had a bit of an eclectic taste and tarted up old furniture on the cheap. :D
www.cathkidston.co.uk or it may be .com
Well better go and do some chores. :D
Love Piglet xx
Afternoon Fee
I'm so glad you are feeling better today. I am still feeling rather under the weather but still no cold as such. It's really weird.
<b id="quote">quote:</b id="quote"><table border="0" id="quote"><tr id="quote"><td class="quote" id="quote">I think I have made some kind of breakthrough in my thinking, thanks to this site and the support I have had from friends lately. I don't think in my whole life I have ever stopped bullying myself and punishing myself...
I don't know what, if any, difference this will make, but I am fed up with trying to be superwoman and am going to be lazywoman instead for a while!!! I actually really have enjoyed just resting this last couple of days and I needed it so much!</td id="quote"></tr id="quote"></table id="quote">
WOW Fee :D:D:DIt sounds like you've had a breakthrough moment like I had the other week. I am so pleased and proud of you Fee.
The Nick Cage film I like is The Family Man.
Well I'm feeling cold and tired so going for a lie down I think.
Karen xx
Hi everyone...
I went out for my lunch, the usual cronies club in the local lol! But just before I went I had a quick word with Mark who was so distressed about having to take Sarah back to the hospital this evening. Bang - I was feeling dreadful again. Managed my lunch but came home and sobbed myself to sleep about Sarah and about Annie...
I've woken up sneezing for England and feel as ropey as :(
Lol Lisa - I'm no film buff either but with having more channels I have started watching more films on tv! The resting thing is a dilemma, I think it's resting without feeling guilty that is so good, or worrying about when you're going to feel better - I have always found that so hard and have never slept very much. I have thought it boring too, but now am starting to quite like it!! My ME doctor years ago kept telling me to rest and only do what I really felt good about for a few months, but I could never do it and kept working and pushing the whole time - I just didn't get it!!! I will pop over to see how you're doing in a min hun xxx
Piglet - I looked at that site - it was lovely! My taste runs to the slightly more minimalist, kinda thing but with a deconstructed french country feel lol!!!! French oak and exposed bricks, natural colours and fabrics with a hint of the traditional... In my dreams eh?!!! I live in one room lol! My mum did that too with eiderdowns - how weird! Those old eiderdowns were lovely weren't they! She also did something like that for mark taking a zip off a sleeping bag and making a cover for it lol!! He had it for years! Hope you are ok today hun xxx
Karen - this 'not a cold' is doing my bloomin head in! Unfortunately I don't think my breakthrough is quite as clear cut as yours, but I'm hopeful - I have so many years of bad habits to get out of in my thought processes - I think I have been 'proving myself' since I got pregnant so young 32 years ago.... also with all the stress that's around me I doubt the change in me will be dramatic, but I will keep plugging away at it (with you as my inspiration!!). Off to look at your place now xxx
Fee xxxxxx
www.like2like.com
Big hug Fee. It is not surprising you felt upset after that. This is a very difficult time for you, and for Mark and Sarah. I am glad you still went out for lunch and had some company for a while.
Do you have Sky? I do but not the movie channels. I am still amazed that at times there is still nothing to watch [:P].
Yes, I know what you mean about the 'non cold'. I almost wish it would develop into the proper sneezing etc just so it would go more quickly. I felt terrible when I got up this morning but this evening the sneezing has stopped again. Maybe this is a different virus that's going round?
I don't think it is helpful to compare progress or breakthroughs because ANY change and move in the right direction is good and worth being proud of yourself for.
I too have many years of negative thinking and unhelpful behaviours to turn around. I am also aware that it is not even quite 2 weeks yet since my turn around and so I do have niggling doubts that it won't last but I am giving it my best shot and doing everything I can to help myself. I think it is the first time ever that I have done this.
Keep going and you can get there. It doesn't matter how quickly or when. Each small step will help you get to where you want to be.
Karen xx
Thanks Karen...
You're right of course I shouldn't try to compare! And I am proud of myself at the moment, I think I am learning and making some progress!
I know what you mean about this cold thing - it just keeps coming and going it would be easier in some ways just to have it and be done with it!
I don't have sky, just top-up but that seems to mean I see a few films I wouldn't otherwise, but yet there is still often absolutely nothing on! Especially when you really want it.
I'm all hot and bothered this evening and my rash is doing weird and wonderful things again! I got a derm appt - in April, which apparently is quite quick!
hope you're relaxing this evening xxx
Fee xxxxxx
www.like2like.com
Hi Fee,
Well done for going out. Sorry you got upset again but it's only natural and we all know a good cry helps. It must be so hard for Mark to have to take Sarah back to hospital though, I'm thinking of you all.
I hope you're tucked up in bed resting and getting over that "non cold" cold.
My taste in furniture sounds just like yours Fee, just the sort of things I like too. My current cottage is very Cotswold farmhouse but quite minimal too. I had a really good clear out of loads of stuff a few years back.
The rest thing is a dilemma, When I was first diagnosed I was told to give up work for a month and then work part time. I was advised to rest during that month but not too much, but it's hard to find the right balance. Anyway me being me I left my job and started another the week after, albeit only 8-12 hours a week! Lol.
It's great that you are able to rest without feeling guilty though, really good.
Anyway I hope you feel better tomorrow and have a good sleep.
Night,
Lisa
PS I hope the counselling goes well tomorrow fee, I just saw that mentioned over at Karen's place.
Night,
Lisa x
Thanks Lisa
Just off to bed now but feel tired, sad, itchy and kind of hot and bothered....
I hope I feel better in the morning..
Nite all xxxx
Fee xxxxxx
www.like2like.com
<b id="quote">quote:</b id="quote"><table border="0" id="quote"><tr id="quote"><td class="quote" id="quote">
I hope I feel better in the morning..
<div align="right">Originally posted by feege - 26 February 2006 : 23:08:42</div id="right">
</td id="quote"></tr id="quote"></table id="quote">
I hope you do too :),
Night,
Lisa x
Hi Fee
I'm so glad you are feeling proud of yourself and recognising the progress you are making. We are all on a learning journey and travel at different speeds. No one way is better or worse than another. We will all get there in the end! :)
Good luck for the counselling appointment tomorrow. We have lunch around 12.30 and then a 'rest period' until about 2pm so feel free to text if you want. I have to switch my phone to silent mode so won't be able to answer if you call.
Hope you have a restful night tonight.
Karen xx
Hi Fee
Good luck for the counselling this morning. I hope you get some benefit from it.
Hope too the 'non cold' is better.
See you later.
Karen
Morning all..
Thanks Karen. I am getting so lazy that it's a rush to get anywhere for 11am these days!
Don't feel too bad this morning but having some very positive thoughts which is unusual lol!
Will talk more later - hope you are all ok xxx
Fee xxxxxx
www.like2like.com
Hi Fee,
Hope you're feeling ok, the positive thoughts sound great.
I hope the counselling went ok.
Thinking of you,
Lisa x
Hi all
Thanks Lisa and Karen! The counsellor was really useful. Actually she is not exactly a counsellor but someone (with some fancy title) that helps people work out what they need and get it... Obviously I want CBT and she had chased up my referral which was made last April apparently, and they are saying another 3 years+ which is really no good to me (although I'll stay on the list). So she researched low-cost CBT in the area and found someone who charges £20-25 a session (better than £65!) and I have an appt in 2 weeks!!! This is excellent news!:D:D
I am also (apparently!!) on a waiting list for an anxiety management course, the waiting list for which is only six months which is brilliant! She is also arranging for me to see the practice counsellor asap just for someone to talk to in the meantime. It was really helpful! She was very nice and I felt more in control and grounded about my physicaly and mental problems than I ever have before. I think that is definitely down to this site, which has helped me to see myself in context. I told her about it too, so she could recommend it to people which felt good.
Then I went to M&S to buy a costume. [:I][Sigh...]. That was bloomin hard work and I don't want to do it ever again if possible!! I didn't realise they had all round mirrors in there [:I][Ugh]. I took about 10 in and dragged them on and off with disgust lol!! But I bought 2 (to avoid doing it again for a good while) and they will do!! I have made an appt to join the Gym tomorrow at 1pm. Fingers crossed!!!
I have had such a clarity about myself this last couple of days and my thoughts (which I have put on the bottom now) really sum it up. I don't know why I live my life anticipating the worst things... it doesn't help at all. I find it so hard to stop the negative thought flalshing through my mind (i.e. what if sarah dies? or is that a lump?). I only think it for a second and then have to spend ages talking myself out of the thought as if it seizes hold of me against my will.
Why do some of us have this problem? Can enough CBT and hard work really stop it happening? Wouldn't it be wonderful not to do it? I'm really beginning to feel like it's possible.... but I havea long long way to go....
I hope you are all ok and am off to look at your places now!
:)
Fee xxxxxx
www.like2like.com
Why live life anticipating the bad things when you could be anticipating the good?
Good and bad things WILL happen!
Hi Fee,
I'm glad your appt today helped so much and I am so pleased you will be getting some CBT, that's great.
Well done for getting a cossie too, a very successful day. I hate all round mirrors too and the light in changing rooms is never flattering, but you are slim, imagine what it's like if you're a bit overweight like me - I want to bring back victorian costumes with long legs! I have real trouble with cossie as standard ones never fit me, I always need the long body ones.
I often anticipate the worst happening too. On the few occasions I have anticipated the best happening it's gone horribly wrong. I tend to think of the worst and then I'm prepared for it and pleasantly suprised if it goes well, whereas it's a shock if I'm being positive and something goes wrong. I do know this isn't the right way to think though. I just feel like I'm tempting fate if I think too positive but then it depends on the subject too.
CBT can really help, it won't stop you having negative thoughts (although they will lesson as positive thoughts become more second nature) but it will give you tools to deal with them much quicker and without them causing distress. Everyone has the odd negative though fleeting into their mind, even non anxious people, but it's all how we interprete things.
Lisa x
Hi Fee
Well what a positive day for you! I am so glad the counsellor was so helpful and had done the research prior to seeing you. It shows she is really on the ball.
It is fantastic news about the CBT and this really could make all the difference. It is hard work but well worth it. I think the cost is pretty good for Brighton as Jill (my hypnotherapist) usually charges £80.
The anxiety management course will be good too.
Well done for getting a costume AND arranging to join the gym [Wow!]. I don't bother trying things on in shops if I can help it because those mirrors are awful. So well done for doing it.
The CBT will, I think, help with the negative thoughts. In the past couple of weeks I have found that I still get negative thoughts and I feel pessimistic about things but I am now making the effort to challenge these thoughts and find the positives. It is not always easy and takes a lot of practise. I am sure we can both get there though.
I am very proud of all you've done today Fee.
Karen xx
Thanks lisa and karen...
I'm so tired I'm just saying goodnight xxxxxxxxxxxxxxx
Fee xxxxxx
www.like2like.com
Why live life anticipating the bad things when you could be anticipating the good?
Good and bad things WILL happen!
Night Fee,
Sleep well [|)],
Love Lisa x
Night Fee. Hope you have a good night's rest.
Karen xx
Hi Fee,
I just wanted to add that I hope things went ok for Sarah at the hospital too, thinking of you all.
I hope the gym goes well tomorrow too.
Night,
Lisa x
Morning Fee.
Hope you feel rested this morning and I hope it goes well at the gym
See you later.
Karen xx
I feel really fed up this morning. I woke up with a horrible stiff neck on the other side from the one I have been having and a bit of a sore throat and headache. I have horrible strange feelings all over my face etc. M eyes feel infected again. I suppose it's mainly tesion and muscle but I'm just fed up with it. I feel so tired, even though I am not working. I guess, true to form, I am expecting to suddenly be completely better because I have had a couple of weeks of work, done some nice things, been more positive... but it just won't be that easy. I don't feel particularly anxious or depressed just physically lousy. I still have the rash, plus an assortment of boils. I seem to have lost confidence in the idea that giving up gluten will make me feel better, and yet I was so sure of it a month ago.
Sorry to be so whingey.
Hope you are all ok today xxxxxxxxxxx
Fee xxxxxx
www.like2like.com
Why live life anticipating the bad things when you could be anticipating the good?
Good and bad things WILL happen!
Hi Fee,
Here's a big (((hug))) for you today, you sound like you need one :D.
Sorry you're feeling fed up, it's understandable. I know what you mean.
It's horribe when we don't know what symptoms we're going to wake with. Alot of it sounds like the "non-cold" maybe. The boils don't sound nice though.
I know sometimes we think more positive etc and think everything should suddenly be ok and then become frustrated when it's not. Even symptoms that are stress/anxiety can take a while to go even if we're constantly positive. Of course any symptoms that are due to ME just linger if they want to, and being positive doesn't help them much it seems. I know you haven't been at work but you've been quite busy still most days, maybe the swimming set you back a bit? especially if you had a non cold brewing. It sounds like you need a restful day and to spend some time snuggled in that new duvet.
Thinking of you and I hope you feel better later.
Lisa x
P.S You are NOT being whingey, I should know too as I whinge enough, I could make it an olympic sport, although I only whinge on here! Lol.
Hi Lisa
Thanks hun i did need a hug! It's just such a constant battle/juggling act, trying to keep your mood upbeat, rest enough, challenge the anxiety lol!!!
I haven't been swimming yet - I'm going to talk to them again about joining and might just get in the pool and jacuzzi - but nothing more! Just something cheerful to do!
I realise that actually a big part of my feeling bad is because sarah is back in hospital and mark can't even talk to me at the moment, he is in complete shut down and I hate that - I think I mentioned before that I have a bit of an attachment issue with him - although I know it's understandable at this time.
I just wish he would speak to me:( I don't know how he is, but I know that means he's not good.
It's just all so hard.
But the website is good - some nice messages have been left and that is cheering us up (thanks Piglet :D) - it was a good idea to have a comments page. My mum put one on at her friends - not bad for an 85 year old eh?!!!
I haven't done a thing this morning so am off to get ready for a swim.... maybe ;)
Fee xxxxxx
www.like2like.com
Why live life anticipating the bad things when you could be anticipating the good?
Good and bad things WILL happen!
Hi Fee,
I understand about the juggling act - maybe we could both join a circus! Lol. Seriously though it is hard, rest for the ME - but not too much, keep busy for the anxiety, etc etc. It's tiring just planning it all! Lol.
I think maybe just the jacuzzi and being in the pool will be enough today, especially as you may have a cold and don't feel great, don't push it too soon - I know you know all this Lol.
It must be really hard for you where Mark is concerned, especially when he won't talk. He obviously deals with it that way. The way you feel and the attachment is normal. I hope Sarah is doing ok. I left a message for the like2like site last night too but don't think it's been put on their yet.
Hope your day gets better, enjoy the swim if you go.
Lisa x
Hi Fee,
I always order cossies from my catalogue, then I can quietly try them on and assess the damage, before I then throw myself on the bed weeping and wailing and flinging my arms and legs about, at the 40+ body that has produced 3 kids and eaten a few too many pringles in its time, which now has to be pushed into a costume with bits that could fling out again at any time.
To counteract this amazing act of shallowness I then get out my affirmation cards about loving your body and give myself a little squeeze, remembering my absolute favourite auntie who used to be stuffed into her blouses and cardigans, every button straining. I loved that woman with all my heart and what she looked like in a costume I couldn't have cared any less about.
As I age I am really beginning to see that beautiful people start from the inside out not the other way around.
That was a bit deep and pompous wasn't it - but I can be deep and I can be pompous [}:)][:I]:D:D:D
Big hugs.
Oh and I had a lovely e-mail from Laura about the comments bit - love and luck to you all xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx
lol piglet - well you saved me from D&P! Having now used the swimsuit in a jacuzzi full of proper wrinklies who were absolutely delightful i feel chastened!!![8D][8D]
It was fantastic to be in the pool too, just did a little.:D:D
don't think I can even check anyone else's place till I've had a nap though[|)][|)][|)][|)]
Hope you're all ok xxxxxxxxxxxx
Fee xxxxxx
www.like2like.com
Why live life anticipating the bad things when you could be anticipating the good?
Good and bad things WILL happen!
Hi Fee,
Well done for going, I'm glad you enjoyed it. Hope you have a nice nap.
Lol Piglet, I know all about bits that want to fling themselves out of costumes.
You're so right that beauty comes from within, so true. Sadly though most men will still be attracted to the slim gorgeous girl rather than the one whose large figure is straining through her buttons! Lol. No offence to any guys reading.
My Gran was a larger lady and I couldn't have loved her more than I did, I never even thought of her size she was just my lovely Granny.
Size is a funny thing though. I am only slightly overweight now really but about 6 years ago I had a hormone problem and I put on 4 stone in weight and was pretty huge (just my boobs alone could wipe out whole villages back then). A friend of mine always used to say I looked fine, yet when I lost all the weight and got thin again she then told me exactly how huge I had looked. Lol.
Love Lisa x
hi guys!
Well I'm awake - just about!!!
Yes the whole weight thing affects us all - but to be honest the best thing about getting older (for me anyway) is that I care about looks less and less.... which is just as well because the effects of ageing are far worse than a bit of lovely young healthy fat!!!! Mind you I have always been more obsessed with being healthy than being thin - looking healthy I mean - I think people can look fantastic at any age and size if they glow with health!! I wish..... There were some wonderfully healthy looking older people there really enjoying it!
I'm rather pleased with my discreet rather tasteful black halter neck costume for the more mature laydee lol - I can see myself falling over the edge of middle age and into senility imminently lol
Anyway I think the little paddle in the pool was good for me anyway and I went in the steam room (for probably less than a minute lol) and it seemed to do something to my ears which I hope might have been good - I want to try and do that again! It was nice too to go with Chris who is a very good looking 32 year old but his psoriasis draws the attention from me lol (he told me that was his mission for the week lol!!).
It's so much lighter in the evenings too which is cheering me up a bit.
Will pop over to your places now xxxxxxxxxxxxxx
Fee xxxxxx
www.like2like.com
Why live life anticipating the bad things when you could be anticipating the good?
Good and bad things WILL happen!
Hi Fee
A (((BIG HUG))) because you were feeling low earlier and for the way you have been so amazing in turning your day around. I think you've done brilliantly!
Well done for getting to the pool and even going in the steam room.
I think I best stay out of the weight discussion because I agree with all of you except when it comes to myself, but my thoughts on this are really just a manifestation of other issues really.
Piglet - that was a brilliant post and it is so true that it is the person inside that matters, even if I have trouble believing it about myself.
Fee, I understand about the attachment issue as you know. I think it is natural too to be worried and feel upset when you know your son is suffering. I'm sure he knows you are there for him though and you are doing what he needs and respecting his need to withdraw for a while. He will be in touch and talk again when he is ready.
Hope you are ok this evening.
Karen xx
I haven't got time to catch up now as my tea is ready but will come by later and catch up.
Lisa x
You know me and mum think Judi Dench is gorgeous with her little elfin features.
I agree Fee a healthy glowing face is a very attractive thing and much more preferable to these peculiar faces of women who just keep chasing their age with face lifts and tons of slap. [Ugh]
......and there endeth todays lesson, Piglet:chapter 2, verse 1, in the book of pompousness!!
Nighty nights peeps :)
Love Piglet xxx
Thanks Karen - I am pleased with myself although I feel a bit low and lonely tonight - probably cos I enjoyed Chris's company today but I know he is wooing a young lady tonight!! Sometimes it would be nice to have someone for me.... not that I could probably cope anyway lol! That and not talking to Mark hardly, although he did call briefly today.
I'm also very itchy again - I just wish I could understand what aggravates it - it's not the swimming cos last time I was fine..
No worries Lisa - I often feel like that too!!
Piglet you have a wonderful way with words - you make me smile so much!! You always sound so positive! Hope you are feeling ok tonight xxx
Another day tomorrow[Sigh...]
Fee xxxxxx
www.like2like.com
Why live life anticipating the bad things when you could be anticipating the good?
Good and bad things WILL happen!
Hi Fee,
Sorry I didn't catch up earlier, I felt so guilty posting on just my post and having to disappear! I always feel I have to visit all our places and I want to of course.
Well done for going swimming, I'm glad you enjoyed it. Sounds like you had a nice afternoon with Chris.
I agree being healthy is the most important thing definitiely but I do know that where men are concerned I get alot of attention when I'm a size 12, a bit when I'm a 14 and none if I'm a 16 plus! Hubby thankfully doesn't care what size I am if he even notices. Lol.
I often get told I look really well and healthy, shame I don't feel it. It must be my make up that makes me glow - all the parabens! Lol.
I don't care what I look like quite as much now I'm older although I rarely go anywhere without make-up on, I always have some on but I'm so pale I get told I look ill without it. When we first moved onto a farm years ago there was me in my stilettos! I now own a pair of wellies and no stilettos! Lol.
I hope you're feeling ok Fee, I am thinking of you. Big hugs.
Love Lisa x
<b id="quote">quote:</b id="quote"><table border="0" id="quote"><tr id="quote"><td class="quote" id="quote">......and there endeth todays lesson, Piglet:chapter 2, verse 1, in the book of pompousness!!
<div align="right">Originally posted by Piglet - 28 February 2006 : 22:04:02</div id="right">
</td id="quote"></tr id="quote"></table id="quote">
Lol Piglet :D. Where would we be without your funny and cheerful posts to brighten our days lol!
Hope you are feeling ok.
Karen xx
Aww sorry you've been feeling lonely Fee. I would've been on MSN tonight but my wrists are causing me a lot of pain at the moment and typing is aggravating the problem. I still can't tear myself away from here though [8)].
I hope you sleep well. I'll probably be around tomorrow if you want to catch up at some point.
Karen xx
Thanks karen
I really do feel pants tonight - I have a couple of huge itchy spots on my wrist, slightly more bite like than the rest of the rash has been and they are making my arm ache.
It's so stupid - I can't even think of anything to be frightened of in relation to itchy spots but it is making me really anxious. I am just so fed up of these weird things I get.....
I hope I can sleep but I reckon I'm in for one of those nights :(
Fee xxxxxx
www.like2like.com
Why live life anticipating the bad things when you could be anticipating the good?
Good and bad things WILL happen!
Hugs Fee :).
I hope you are managing to sleep now.
Karen xx
Hi Fee,
I hope you're feeling better today and managed to get a good night's sleep.
Love and hugs,
Lisa x
Morning gang,
How is everyone today - feel a little lost now this assignment is done and hope they hurry up with the next one as I would quite like this module done and dusted by the end of March, then I can get on to concentrating soley (d'ya get it - solely) on squeezing feet!!:D
Love Piglet xx
Wow Piglet, you're soaring ahead with this!! How are you today?
Fee - Hope you had a good night's rest.
Karen xx
Hi everyone
I don't know why but I seem to have fallen into a self-pitying low... Got no energy at all to post positively and don't want to listen to myself whingeing any more.... No idea why I feel so pants.
I've been out to take my lodger to the station (going away for a couple of days) and my friend and I went for coffee and picked up a chair my mum wanted and took it round. All very pleasant... but I feel like I'm dragging a couple of tons of rocks everywhere with me, I have an awful sinking feeling in my tummy and can't find the positive in anything although I keep chanting them all, how well I've been doing, all the things I have put in place etc. But I'm just sick and tired of being me today. I want to have fun again, plan to see people and manage it, book a holiday, flirt with a man (rofl! fat chance). I feel insecure, unlikeable, rejected, left out, lonely, paranoid.... the whole kit and kaboodle and I just don't understand why.
Well I'm off to weep a bit more. Sorry if I don't post on your places today, don't want to bring anyone down. I'll probably be ok later an wonder what this was all about but for now I'm off to weep a bit more and wallow in self-pity....:(
I do hope you guys are ok xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx
Fee xxxxxx
www.like2like.com
Why live life anticipating the bad things when you could be anticipating the good?
Good and bad things WILL happen!
Hi Fee,
Aww big (((hugs))) mate.
Sorry you are feeling so down and low. I wish I could say something to help you. It's natural to feel low sometimes especially if you have a cold or something aswell as the ME and other symptoms. I know it's hard but this will pass and you'll come out the other side. You have alot to deal with right now aswell so don't be too hard on yourself. Let yourself cry if you need to and listen to your body.
You did well to go out and do things even though you feel like this.
I do know how you feel to some extent, at least as far as just wanting to be able to plan a normal life. Just remember you are already doing some of the things you listed: you do have fun sometimes and you do plan to see people and do it etc.
You're not bringing anyone down today and no need to post anywhere other than right here.
Thinking of you, lots of big hugs,
Love Lisa x
Hi petal,
Unlikeable - are you quite quite mad????[:O]
I think I can put my hand on my heart and say I doubt anyone in your whole life has ever said that about you let alone thought it.
Fee you are a very funky lady who has thus far had a very interesting life with lots more interesting chapters coming up. I think I am a bit lonely too, so I identify with you there - my kids are growing up fast and doing their own things right left and centre and only piglet no. 3 seems to need me now :(. I get scared I am gonna be sat at home with only my face creams to keep me company[:I][:O]:D
You know we are not a million miles apart and soon when we are both feeling a tad more adventerous I think a get together would be fab.
We are rapidly coming to new stages in our lives and I am happy to be around to be your friend while we adjust to them if you like:D:D
Piglet xxx
Aww Fee. Must be something in the air tonight.
I agree completely with Piglet. You are very likeable and you are not getting away from us that easily! We are your friends and are here to stay :).
Have a good cry to let the emotion out as it might help you feel better. Well done for getting out when you are feeling so low.
I hope you are feeling better tonight.
Karen xx
Hi you lovely people!
I have been sobbing for England and a friend came round and she got a shower!! I have no idea why this is coming out like this today - I can only hope it's therapeutic.. it's exhausting!
I still feel awful but in a more sleepy way, a bit drained and odd...
I don't know what I'd do without you guys - thank you for being here.... I'm not sure I can talk any more - but I'll be back!
Love you all loads xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx
Fee xxxxxx
www.like2like.com
Why live life anticipating the bad things when you could be anticipating the good?
Good and bad things WILL happen!
Hi Fee,
Another big (((hug))) mate, you deserve it.
Sometimes we just need to let all our emotions out, it is good but I know it's exhausting.
I'm glad you had a friend round and had some company and a shoulder to cry on.
We're here for you as and when you need us.
Try and get an early night, I hope you sleep well and that tomorrow is a better day for you.
Night night,
Lisa x
Just to say Good morning.
Good morning :D
Love Piglet xx
Hi Fee,
I'm saying good morning too :).
I hope you're feeling better today. Thinking of you.
Love and hugs,
Lisa x
Hi everyone - thanks for the messages..
I'm still feeling pants - not quite so weepy but so tired and woozy and faint....
Went to Doc am and he was really supportive, can't check anything out atm until after biopsy really but I hope gluten is to blame for how rubbish i feel although I think I have cystitis as well now lol!!!
So I have antibiotics and cranberry juice and just keep falling asleep. I have so little energy for anything even reading, proper ME. Brainfog. I found the foggy friends website the other day which is really lively (how weird!) but been too tired to use it!!!!
I hope you're all ok - will go and look now xxxxxxxxxxxxx
Fee xxxxxx
www.like2like.com
Why live life anticipating the bad things when you could be anticipating the good?
Good and bad things WILL happen!
Hi Fee,
Sorry you're feeling rough still. Well done for making it to the docs. I hope the antibiotics help, I'm sure having cystitis aswell could be making you feel rough.
Thankfully I don't really get the brainfog part of ME, touch wood as I don't want to jinx myself!
Look after yourself,
love and hugs
Thinking of you.
Lisa x
HUGS Fee.
I hope you are feeling a little better this evening. I too feel extemely tired still and think it could well be due to some sort of virus.
Having cystitis won't help either. At least you have some antibiotics now and hopefully these will help.
Karen xx
Hope you are having a nice time with your friend - keep taking the bananas :D
Night night :)
Piglet xx
Hi Fee,
Just to say I'm still thinking of you. I hope you feel better soon.
Love and hugs,
Night night,
Lisa x
Thanks for your messages everyone.
I'm having a bad patch at the moment, both exhausted and anxious (great combo!).
Am off to bed and hoping for a better day tomorrow....
Night all xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx
Fee xxxxxx
www.like2like.com
Why live life anticipating the bad things when you could be anticipating the good?
Good and bad things WILL happen!
Aww Fee.
I hope tomorrow is a better day for you.
Karen xx
<center>GOOD MORNIING!!</center>
:D:D
Love Piglet xx
Hee hee would have been even nicer if I could spell!!!!
Good morning
I'm so diappointed I still feel so rotten and I'm just not sure what's going on. My legs are very itchy and I have a couple of these very itchy bite like spots on my face and arms. I feel hot and clammy, very dizzy and faint again....:(
I'm trying not to get anxious about it all but I just don't know what's going on. I don't feel like I really have cystitis although maybe I have so I'm equivocating about the antibiotics. The dizziness feels different from my vertigo, more faint like.
I'm just so fed up with feeling ill all the time. I guess I'll just have to sit it out and hope for the best. But this is when I get twisted into questioning, is it this, is it that, how can I be this ill and nobody be able to help. Well, there you go, I guess that's what ME is all about and how it leads to anxiety and health anxiety in particular. Although how it can be causing a rash I don't know!!!
6 more days to biopsy. I'm not looking forward to it obviously but I'm more concerned that if coming off gluten doesn't make me feel better then nothing ever will, although I know I have felt this bad before and suddenly it lifts... I'm too tired to read which is one of the most typical symptoms of ME, brain fatigue, and the hardest for people to understand.
I just don't want ME any more. I have been dealing with this for best part of 20 years, periods of complete inability to function on any meaningful level. I have so much I want to do, such a passion for life and capacity for fun and it's just squashed out of me.
Sorry for the negativity, but there is just nothing I can do except rest until it passes again... When I was first ill it went on for over a year but since then it has never lasted more than a couple of weeks and usually just a couple of days recently but every time I live in terror of it lasting for a long time or even for ever... It's not living, it's just existing, hanging by a thread.
Sorry again I didn't realise all this was going to come out of me.
Oddly I know I might feel better later, it sometimes just lifts like that, for no apparent reason.
I hope you are all ok - off to have a look xxxxxxxxxxxxx
Fee xxxxxx
www.like2like.com
Why live life anticipating the bad things when you could be anticipating the good?
Good and bad things WILL happen!
LOL Piglet you posted that while I was droning on - and made me smile and laugh at my miserable groaning!
Thanks hun! :D:D
Fee xxxxxx
www.like2like.com
Why live life anticipating the bad things when you could be anticipating the good?
Good and bad things WILL happen!
When we have alot of stuff inside that we have been hanging onto then eventually it needs to come out.
By nature you are a positive, jolly person who doesn't do this enough.
So every now and again a bl**dy good purge is called for and if you do it on here you are in the right place.
Big hugs hun - lets deal with one medical issue at a time ie: the gluten thing and then when the results are through it may or maynot address some of the other issues. Your state of mind is mixed up with the state of your health and it will really help to be able to know one way or the other about the gluten.
Why don't you see how you feel for the rest of today about the cystitis and if it's not better tomorrow morning get started on the antibiotics.
I know when I had my indigestion thing and then 6 months later the ibs thing I just began to feel I wasn't lots of little issues but one enormous issue. Gradually though as I looked after myself big time they got sorted out.
You will too :)
Piglet xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx xx
Oh piglet hun thanks so much... you are so right, i know you are but this seems to have been one of the longest pantsest weeks i've had for years...
I wish i could just be sedated now and get on with the next stage!
Your post really helped, you really got inside the situation, when you are so tired, poorly and overwhelmed you just roll everything into one big bleugh!
Thank goodness for this site!!!
loads of love xxxxxxxxxxxxxxx
Fee xxxxxx
www.like2like.com
Why live life anticipating the bad things when you could be anticipating the good?
Good and bad things WILL happen!
Hi Fee
Aww hon, I am sorry you are feeling so ill and low today, and I hope things have lifted for you a bit now.
I agree completely with Piglet about all these issues merging into one problem which then seems to huge and overwhelming. Let us help you through the biopsy appointment first and then see where you go from there. You did say you felt better when you avoided gluten before so this may well help.
<b id="quote">quote:</b id="quote"><table border="0" id="quote"><tr id="quote"><td class="quote" id="quote">I'm too tired to read which is one of the most typical symptoms of ME, brain fatigue, and the hardest for people to understand.</td id="quote"></tr id="quote"></table id="quote">
Well, I don't have ME and I get this too. It is why I find it so difficult to get far with studying and doing courses etc. I am too tired to read or to retain information even if I do read.
<b id="quote">quote:</b id="quote"><table border="0" id="quote"><tr id="quote"><td class="quote" id="quote">I live in terror of it lasting for a long time or even for ever... It's not living, it's just existing, hanging by a thread.</td id="quote"></tr id="quote"></table id="quote">
I've felt like this too Fee, particularly at the worst times with depression. I have wished I could be out of it just to avoid dealing with each day when I felt like I was merely existing. All I can say really is that it does lift and you will get to a time when the days are enjoyable again. This is a blip and feeling so ill does not help.
The virus type illness is probably contributing too because I still like I am suffering from this too.
Keep finding little things to help you get through the day. Treat yourself kindly, maybe with a nice soak in a bubble bath, or watching a favourite film, or whatever might help a little.
I am holding your hand and willing you to come through this :).
Karen xx
Thanks karen hun...
It really does help to remember people without ME etc feel like this too sometimes!!
I have barely lifted myself off the sofa today, struggling to make a cup of tea or read or anything but after dozing off (again!) this afternoon I have felt a smidgen better! It would be easier to cope if I had a cold or something, but it's all so vague and woolly! Maybe it is this non-cold thing still.
I am sure getting the biopsy over with will help - at the very least it won't be hanging over me! And maybe I'm more upset than I thought by Annie going - who knows. Whatever's going on I know it will pass eventually!
I'm hanging in!!
love n hugs xxxxxxxxxxxxxxx
Fee xxxxxx
www.like2like.com
Why live life anticipating the bad things when you could be anticipating the good?
Good and bad things WILL happen!
Good on you Fee for hanging on in there.
I think this is a combination of a number of things that are happening in your life at present, physically and emotionally.
We are here to help you through it :).
Karen xx
Night night Fee mate:)
Love Piglet xx
"Supposing a tree fell down, Pooh, when we were underneath it?" said Piglet.
"Supposing it didn't," said Pooh after careful thought.
Hi Fee,
Sorry you're still having a tough time, I am glad to see you were feeling more positive in your last post. As you told me when I was feeling like this last week, things can and will improve.
I know you have so many issues going on right now and it is difficult to know what is what sometimes. I really know what you mean about the ME too, although I'm so lucky I don't really get the brain fog.
I was talking to my ME lady about setbacks today and how to manage them. She said to me again that resting alot more than usual is not good, she said too much resting can cause negative changes in the body and that resting and withdrawing from activity increases anxiety and feeling fed up and being inactive makes it harder to be active again long term. She said when we rest the body adjusts to the lower level of activity and weakens further, then it becomes more sensitive to activity which makes symptoms worse, therefore during a setback it's good to maintain as much normal daily activity as it possible. Of course she also thinks rest periods are good, in fact essential, if paced properly through the day. She stressed that day time sleep wasn't good too, other than a short nap. She said during a severe setback it's ok to reduce activity a bit and build back up gradually. Also if the setback is due to a cold, virus or other non ME related illness it's sensible to rest of course and then build back slowly rather than rushing back to normal. She said this approach is the way most ME specialists now think and there is lots of research to show that it works. Certainly all the ME people I've ever seen have said this as have all the books I've read. Just thought I'd share with you anyway. It makes sense to me and seems to work for me to some extent too. It's all such a balancing act isn't it! Of course we all have to do and find what workes best for us.
I had a lovely email from Sarah's sister Laura and she has put my message on the site now. I hope Sarah is doing ok and Mark too of course.
I do hope things get better for you soon, I really do, but I know they will in time.
Right better leave it there as even typing for the last 15 mins has set my back off a bit again.
Thinking of you, sleep well,
Love and hugs,
Lisa x
Hi everyone and thanks for all your encouragement. I am feeling significantly better this evening HOORAH!!!!
I know all I need is to rest more and it will pass again. For me it is not resting enough that causes all the anxiety, fighting against what my body is telling me which is my natural instinct but I am learning!!
Hi lisa - thanks for putting the message on! She is doing really well at the moment, the chemo hasn't affected her too badly yet, thankfully.
Too tired to read any posts tonight so I'm off to bed!
Nite Nite - love and hugs xxxxxxxxxxxxx
Fee xxxxxx
www.like2like.com
Why live life anticipating the bad things when you could be anticipating the good?
Good and bad things WILL happen!
Well, bizarre.....
I woke up this morning feeling quite significantly better and thought, well there you go - just a good day's proper resting. Then I thought, maybe it had all been the non-cold.
Then I realised - I didn't eat any gluten yesterday at all!!! Could that really really be what's wrong with me?
Anyway I'm going to try not to dwell on why I feel better lol and just enjoy it - cos my first two thoughts might have been right. But 5 days to biopsy and counting!!!
My head is clear, nothing hurts and I haven't got that dragging exhaustion and it's a bright sunny day - I think I'll drive somewhere nice for a quiet lunch - I have barely been out of the house this week!
Hope you are all ok xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx
Fee xxxxxx
www.like2like.com
Why live life anticipating the bad things when you could be anticipating the good?
Good and bad things WILL happen!
Morning matey:D
Feel sure there is a link with whole gluten thing - we are so affected by what we eat aren't we. Look at me with caffiene!!!!
Big hugs and have a lovely day - its all sunshiney isn't it, makes all the difference.
Love Piglet xx
Hi Fee
I am so pleased you are feeling better today. Sounds like it could well be gluten related and once the tests are finished hopefully you can avoid gluten which seems to make a huge difference to you.
Hope you enjoy your lunch :).
Karen xx
Hi Karen and Piglet
Well it must be Gluten at least in part!! What a fantastic day - I picked mum up and drove out to Steyning to look at the countryside and we had a wander round the shops and lunch - it was gorgeous!
But of course I have to eat gluten and had Welsh Rarebit for lunch (and a bit of mum's cake mmmmmm) and promptly felt a bit dizzy again - how weird!
Had a nap and woke up with the thumb on the throat thing which I haven't had for yonks, but I hope it will pass fairly quickly.
Hope you are all ok xxxxxxxxxxxxxxx
Fee xxxxxx
www.like2like.com
Why live life anticipating the bad things when you could be anticipating the good?
Good and bad things WILL happen!
Hi Fee,
I'm so pleased that you're feeling so much better today, great news :D.
Well done for going out, it's a lovely day here too.
Lisa x
Hi Fee
Sounds like you have had a lovely day and I am glad you have been feeling so much better.
It does seem that the gluten is affecting you quite badly and hopefully it will help after you've had the tests and can start cutting it out of your diet again.
Hope you are having a good evening.
Karen xx
Hi Fee,
Just saying night night and I'm thinking of you. Hope you're feeling ok tonight.
Love and hugs,
Lisa x
Afteroon Fee.
I hope you are having a good day and enjoying the nice weather.
Karen xx
Hi Fee,
Hope you're ok and having another good day.
Thinking of you.
Lisa x
Hi everyone and thanks again for the messages.
I am feeling too awful for words, faint, dizzy, shaking, bad stomach, I've had massive palipitations and have barely been out of bed.
I'm too tired even to come on here properly. I cannot believe gluten can do this to me, I've been eating it all my life but nothing else makes sense either... one day off and I felt better, one day back on and here I am back at square one.
If this is anxiety then I'm demented.... I guess I just won't know for sure until after Thursday.
Sorry not to be keeping up - I miss the contact but just can't stay awake today...
Hope you are all ok xxxxxxxxxxxxx
Fee xxxxxx
www.like2like.com
Why live life anticipating the bad things when you could be anticipating the good?
Good and bad things WILL happen!
Hi Fee
Sorry you are feeling so rotten today. If it is gluten then you will feel a whole lot better once you can cut it out completely. It does seem like it is at least contributing to your symptoms.
Perhaps there is an element of anxiety too about Thursday and I think you will feel more settled once that it over with.
No need to apologise for not posting. You have my mobile number if you need to talk.
Just rest tonight and I hope you are soon feeling better.
Karen xx
Thanks Karen. I seem to be reviving a little now but could happily got to bed again - all I've done all day is get up and dressed!
I'm going to go look at your places I think - see how I go!
love n hugs xxxxxxxxxxx
Fee xxxxxx
www.like2like.com
Why live life anticipating the bad things when you could be anticipating the good?
Good and bad things WILL happen!
Aww sorry you felt so rough earlier.
I have certainly had days like that over the past 6 years and obviously still do here and there.
I did my bp today as I had a dream last night that it was really high and it made me soooo angry in my sleep :D:D:D I nearly kicked the hell out of poor ted (new members that is not my husband it really is my ted). Anyway it was fine and I felt rather stupid [:I]. Still it makes a change from the fish finger dreams.
I am sure you will feel better after the test this week - if only because it helps to get nearer to some answers one way or the other.
Big hugs.
Love Piglet xxx
Thanks Piglet!
It's weird isn't it, in the middle of it all it's so hard to believe anyone else has ever felt so awful!!!
I hope you're having a nice day today after taking it out on poor Ted - did you you have to take him to teddy hospital? lol!!! I've had dreams like that before, how strange....
Have eaten gluten free organic tin of rice pud and feel vaguely human now! I feel I need to do something before I go back to bed but can't think of anything. I'm a bit worried that I'm not eating enough gluten for the test to be conclusive, but I just can't eat any today....
3.5 days to go.......
love n hugs xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx
Fee xxxxxx
www.like2like.com
Why live life anticipating the bad things when you could be anticipating the good?
Good and bad things WILL happen!
Hi Fee
Glad you are feeling a bit better tonight. I think getting up and dressed is an achievement when you are not feeling too good. I've spent many a day in bed and not moving at all.
Perhaps give the gluten a rest tonight and see how you are tomorrow. Do you have to eat a set amount prior to having the test?
Piglet: Poor ted [B)]. I hope you gave him a cuddle after kicking him lol!!
<b id="quote">quote:</b id="quote"><table border="0" id="quote"><tr id="quote"><td class="quote" id="quote">I did my bp today as I had a dream last night that it was really high... Anyway it was fine and I felt rather stupid [:I].
<div align="right">Originally posted by Piglet - 05 March 2006 : 18:49:35</div id="right">
</td id="quote"></tr id="quote"></table id="quote">
No need to feel stupid. We all revert to checking behaviour like this at times.
Hope you are feeling better tomorrow Fee.
Karen xx
Hi Fee,
Glad you're feeling a bit better this evening. Sleep well tonight, I'm still thinking of you.
Sorry I'm not saying much I'm trying to keep off here a bit for my back mostly but it's doing me good not to be here so much. I've given up totally trying to keep up with the rest of the forum other than our posts and Karen's as there seem to be 50 new posts every few hours now!
I am still here for you though so if I can help in any way just yell.
Lol Piglet - at least you didn't dream that your hand fell off onto the floor!
Night all,
Lisa x
Poor Ted I am going to settle him really comfortably tonight - IN ANOTHER ROOM!!!
He is too old for all these shenanigans, he has hardly any fur left and is very creaky and half of one eye is missing (something to do with being thrown in the air when his owner choked on a stolen boiled sweet).
I love him to bits and he has been the best man in my life apart from my dad, who comes in slightly ahead owing to some payment of debts for the teenage piglet needing clubbing clothes, who used a store card in a silly manner [:I] cough cough, which is all forgotten now!!!
Night night.
Love Piglet xx
Thanks Karen, Lisa and Piglet!
Karen you're right getting up and dressed has been an achievement today! I just ironed a couple of things so I didn't feel the day had been entirely wasted too - totally wiped out again now, but all the other symptoms are receeding thanks goodness!
Lisa hun don't apologise - I think you're being really really wise to stay off the pc as much as possible - it's a wonderful comfort but definitely has it's down sides!
I know how you feel about your teddy Piglet - I too have my teddy by me every night - he has been very loyal, never answers back and understands simple facts like I am always right..... no man could ever compete!!
I hope you all sleep well tonight,
love n hugs xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx
Fee xxxxxx
www.like2like.com
Why live life anticipating the bad things when you could be anticipating the good?
Good and bad things WILL happen!
Piglet - LOL!! I think Ted will be safer in another room - being kicked and thrown up into the air :D.
It's quite ironic talking about childhood toys, as I had this discussion with K recently - something to do with rescuing the inner child. I'd cleared out everything that reminded me of my childhood when I moved as that was the bad space I was in at the time.
Fee: Glad you are feeling better. Hope you have a good night's sleep and tomorrow is better for you.
Night all.
Karen xx
Hi Fee,
Hope you're ok today. It's a lovely sunny one here.
Lisa x
How are you today Fee?
I hope you are feeling better.
Karen xx
Hi Lisa and Karen!
I am much better today, I didn't eat Gluten yesterday - it's all too weird...
Anyway I decided just to get up and do things and so I did the housework, Went for a walk and a coffee with a friend, went for a swim (very very gently paddle and jacuzzi) and just got in. Freel great atm.
While I was out I popped into pharmacist for some mouth wash cos since I felt so rough on Sat I have had an awful taste in my mouth and strange sensations... he looked at my tongue and said I have an infection and need antipbiotics!! Where else can I get infections!! Yet again, I was trying to ignore it cost I thought it was anxiety! So now I have to got to the Doc AGAIN!!!!
I must be sooooo run down. Roll on Thursday!
Have some food cooking - will check your places later - hope you are both ok..and Piglet of course!!
loads of love xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx
Fee xxxxxx
www.like2like.com
Why live life anticipating the bad things when you could be anticipating the good?
Good and bad things WILL happen!
Hi Fee,
Glad you are doing so well, can't stop either hubby is just about to walk in the door. I'm so pleased you had a good day.
Lisa x
Hi Fee
Glad you are feeling so much better today.
<b id="quote">quote:</b id="quote"><table border="0" id="quote"><tr id="quote"><td class="quote" id="quote">I didn't eat Gluten yesterday - it's all too weird...
</td id="quote"></tr id="quote"></table id="quote">
It does seem too much of a coincidence not to be related. Hopefully the tests on Thursday will prove this one way or another.
Well done for all you have done today. You are doing great. Did you enjoy the swim?
Karen xx
Hi you two!
Thanks Lisa!! (HMV??!!!)
Thanks Karen - I really enjoyed the 'swim' (thats a bit of an exagerration!!).
Fee xxxxxx
www.like2like.com
Why live life anticipating the bad things when you could be anticipating the good?
Good and bad things WILL happen!
Hi Fee,
HMV??? Sorry but have no idea what that means? Maybe I'm being blonde but really have no idea.
I'm so glad you had a good day and enjoyed the swim.
I hope you sleep well,
Lisa x
lol Lisa - HMV is a record label (His Master's Voice!!)!
Yet again I've been having waves of panic - this time about the 'mouth infection' which of course is mouth cancer which I deserve because I smoke:(.
I haven't googled about it thankfully and am doing as much positive thinking as I can but I am basically hanging out for after the biopsy to get my general anxiety levels back under control.
I think when you have ME and you feel generally unwell so much of the time it is so easy to think there is another underlying cause for anything that you get wrong with you because that would make more sense than ME which is so hard to accept. The symptoms of ME and anxiety, particularly if you are run down, are so all-encompassing it is just too easy to slip into thinking there is something else going on. I don't know how anyone manages not to do this to be honest.
The bottom line though is that worrying about it and thinking about it just doesn't help and if something else is going on it'll happen or it won't so why worry now? Hah! easier said than done!! I try to enjoy whatever time I have that I do feel ok as much as possible and I am so looking forward to next week when maybe with having the biopsy over I can feel more positive, come off gluten, see the CBT person on the Thursday and get my anxiety levels down.
I'm so up and down at the moment and all these infections are symptomatic of how run down I am with everything that is going on, but I have had a really good day today (up until about half an hour ago when the mouth thing started to play on my mind!!!).
Well I might take a bit of a sleeper again tonight and hope for another good day tomorrow....
love n hugs to you all, nite nite xxxxxxxxxxxxxxx
Fee xxxxxx
www.like2like.com
Why live life anticipating the bad things when you could be anticipating the good?
Good and bad things WILL happen!
Hi Fee,
Now first no googling ok! Lol. I'm sure the mouth problem is because you are run down - you should see my tongue, I get geographic tongue occasionally, it's harmless but looks very odd.
I know how you feel about the ME and anxiety, it can be very hard some days to know what is what. I was reading my ME magazine today and it includes patients stories of how they cope and what their lives are like etc, even the ones that never have anxiety feel like we do at times which is reassuring. It alse made me realise how many suffer far worse than I do. It really is a frustrating illness.
I really think that as things start to progress and get sorted, you will see alot more gradual improvement in all areas. It will get better, just keep believing it - I know how hard that is too!
Try and relax and hope you sleep well. Right I am off to bed now.
Lisa x (yes I do obey the masters voice! Lol, well sometimes when it suits me too Lol)
Hi Fee
I think you are probably thinking along the right lines with rationalising that this mouth infection is because you are a bit run down, particularly with the gluten symptoms too.
We all do let the anxiety get to us at times but maybe in different ways. The physical symptoms have never worried me as much as fears of people noticing, or making a fool of myself. These thoughts are just as irrational as health worries and in fact I can appear to be quite calm even when I am very anxious!
Hopefully once the tests are over with on Thursday and you can also start some CBT this will help. Can you cut gluten out once you've had the biopsy taken? It does seem to help you feel so much better.
I hope you get a good night's rest and well done again for all you achieved today. It is even more significant to do so much when you are not feeling great.
Karen xx
Morning everyone
I don't feel too bad this morning (what 2 days in a row? [:O]).
I managed to stay calm last night, rinsed mouth with Corsodyl and also salt (and remembered I have had this before!).
It's such a struggle keeping out the negative thoughts but I am managing it most of the time!
Hi Lisa - reading about ME is so depressing isn't it... it helps to know all the symptoms that can be attributed to ME and that you're not alone but as you know I didn't read about it for over 10 years and I must say the way it is presented these days is much more scary!! And the diversity of approaches to treatment is difficult to cope with too - I don't feel like anyone is helping me with that side of things at all, although my GP is doing his best. Anyway I didn't google - progress for me lol! xxx
Thanks Karen - I did seem to do quite well yesterday thank goodness. It's so hard on your own...I can see how similar your fears/thoughts are - it's a struggle but we're getting there!! xxx
Hi Lucy - thanks for those good suggestions - yes oral thrush is a possibility - I'll have to check with GP. I wish I could stop smoking it would be such a positive thing but I'm so anxious at the moment :(. I am getting very nervous about the endoscopy now, but so glad it will soon be over - not long for you either! Hope you are feeling ok xxx
Not got much to do except get in a gluten free shop today!!
Fee xxxxxx
www.like2like.com
Why live life anticipating the bad things when you could be anticipating the good?
Good and bad things WILL happen!
Hi Lucy
Thanks for the links! Will have a proper look later - am off to Doc's in a min! I've been relying on the GF Forum and CUK for all my advice for the last 6 months, if I get a diagnosis you get prescription foods and the GF bible which lists all the things you can eat!
I'm having the sedation because I have real swallowing problems but really am dreading it - like you anything like that knocks me out for ages... but at least I won't be panicking until it wears off!!!
I think going without is better if you think you can manage it, no point in having unneccessary drugs imho - I just couldn't face it!
I will let you know how it goes!
Hope you're having a good day!
love n hugs xxxxxxxxx
Fee xxxxxx
www.like2like.com
Why live life anticipating the bad things when you could be anticipating the good?
Good and bad things WILL happen!
Hi Fee,
I'm glad you're feeling ok again today, that's great.
Well done for staying calm last night and not googling.
I was treated for oral thrush once too, my gp wasn't sure if it was thrush or my usual geographic tongue so we treated it anyway, it only involved sucking a pastille of some sort.
I don't really find reading about ME that depressing (I must be odd!). Of course some stories are bleak like when someone only has 2 good days per year and has been ill for 30 + years but the success stories are quite inspiring to read. I like reading about the new research they are doing too, and the magazine gives lots of tip on how to cope and the tips can be from other sufferers and the medical profession. I do feel lucky to be getting so much help with my ME from the trial. I also have a brilliant specialist I can see if I need to and my gp really understands it too. I think approaches to treatment do still vary but most specialists and ME societies seem to be taking the same approach nowadays which is along the lines of what I am being told at my ME trial. Prof Pinches (didn't you see him?) often now writes articles in my ME magazine and he advocates this approach now too. I think in recent years they have alot more data on what works and it's not as vague as it was years ago. The main things are still pacing, graded exercise and CBT though and all help if done properly with expert input in my experience so far. I thought I was pacing well in the early days until I was told otherwise, I seem to have the hang of it now though - most of the time!
Hope the rest of your day is good.
Lisa x
Lucy,
I have used the goodness direct site before, it was good although I can't remember what I ordered.
Gluten is mostly found in wheat but can also be found in smaller quantities in other grains such as rye and barley. Other grains like oats contain gluten in a different form to that found in wheat but if you are sensitive to the wheat type you may need to see if you can eat barley, rye and even oats. Most people only need to avoid wheat though it seems but some can be sensitive to all.
Gluten is a special type of protein called gliadin and is found in many cereals/grains but mostly wheat and in smaller quantities rye and barley.
Thre gluten found in other grains has a different name which I can't remember off hand.
Just adding my sciency bit (but expect you both know all this), I used to work as a scientist in a flour mill about 8 years ago and worked alot with wheat and other grains, one test I used to do was to see if the wheat contained enough gluten to make the bread elastic.
Hope the doctors goes well Fee.
Lisa x
Hi Fee
How did you get on at the doctor's?
I am glad you have been feeling ok again today. I think it is good to accept the good days and just take things one day at a time.
<b id="quote">quote:</b id="quote"><table border="0" id="quote"><tr id="quote"><td class="quote" id="quote">It's such a struggle keeping out the negative thoughts but I am managing it most of the time!</td id="quote"></tr id="quote"></table id="quote">
You could've done with being at our CBT group today! We were discussing negative thoughts and how to start challenging the thoughts. It isn't actually possible to prevent the thought - just like if I asked you not to think of a pink elephant - what do you immediately think of??? However, it is possible to change the way we react to these thoughts and that's what I am trying to do now. Good job I have been practising because this is our 'homework' this week :D.
You are right - we are getting there and we will get through this. I bought a 'Finding Nemo' float today ready for going swimming at some point. I have more issues with this than facing being unable to swim though at present - like putting on a swimming costume [:I].
Hope you are ok tonight.
Karen xx
Hi lisa and karen and lucy!
Well the Doc said it was fungal so I have some vile mouthwash stuff! I do hope all this is going to turn out to be gluten related, it's getting a bit silly - although he did also mention the possibility of systemic Candida, which the medical profession are not really embracing but is very popular on the alternative health front! So I suppose if I don't have Coeliac's I could pursue that, the diet is very similar.. it is something that has been suggested to me over the years but again I've avoided as it's not mainstream and reinforces my image of myself as just basically neurotic!!!
Anyway I have been fine today, did my food shopping and met Chris for tea and GF cake in that lovely cafe called Serenity in Hove - oh it's so cute, proper china, lovely teas - I just love it!!
Only one more day to get through. I will be so glad to get it over with, I am very very nervous now [:O]
Lisa - I used to see Professor Pinching - is that him? That was at Bart's in 1990-92. He was very nice but didn't help me much!!! The local ME Association seems to be torn in half between two camps here - and has been for years which is one of the reasons I have avoided the whole issue and tried to just get on with it. I have 3 friends here with ME, who have all reacted very differently, on who was diagnosed 10 years ago and ended up in a wheelchair for 2 years and is now completely recovered, one who is just very tired all the time but has no other symptoms and manages pretty well, and one who like me goes through phases of being pretty well with relapses of indeterminate length and unclear causes! I find it difficult to accept we all have the same thing sometimes.... I think that's been my problem, historically. I think the latest research is fascinating and I believe that if they can identify something new it will explain a proportion of the people who are ill, the rest will still be searching! After all at the moment it is a clinical diagnosis, based on subjective descriptions of sets of symptoms (as are other more commonly accepted syndromes) - but all that may be about to change!
What I want to know is why you only got a pastille Lisa and I get a week's worth of vile mouth wash lol!![:P]
Karen that sounds JUST what I need and I can't wait to get started on CBT! So just how DO you change the way you respond lol... only joking don't try and answer me I know it's a long old process:D. Lol at the Nemo-float!!! I look forward to you coming over one day and we can have a swim and a cup of tea!!! I'll have to get a guest pass so you can come to the place I go where it's really quiety and not intimidating. There was a guy trying to learn the other day and there was just me and him in the pool. I swim like a drowning spider by the way - no style or class lol!!![:I] And I know what you mean about getting in a costume! I told Chris about my trip to M&S and he said - well just buy some black all in one thing and of course that's exactly what I did (except I bought 2, the second actually being 2 pieces although you wouldn't notice lol!!!). Just getting there and parking was part of the challenge for me, so I'm just trying to get used to doing that regularly!!!
Hope you are all ok - off to have a look!
Is this my longest yet?!!!!!!!!!!!
Fee xxxxxx
www.like2like.com
Why live life anticipating the bad things when you could be anticipating the good?
Good and bad things WILL happen!
Just to say Fee and Lucy try not to worry about your hosp appts - I had my second one done 18 months ago and I did choose not to have the sedation as this meant I could go home quicker.
Loved the fact I stayed in my own clothes as when I was 18 you had to change into a gown. I did have a little cry/tear at first cos I was soooo scared but they reassured me no end and a nice nurse let me hold her hand.
Yes on balance I would rather get my hair done but figured if I panicked I was in the right hands (more so than I would be at the hairdressers):D:D.
Was goin to say something about having worse things put down my throat but realised that sounded rather vulgar, so we'll leave it there[:I][:I]
Love Piglet xx
"Supposing a tree fell down, Pooh, when we were underneath it?" said Piglet.
"Supposing it didn't," said Pooh after careful thought.
lol piglet - what DO you mean[:O]
I think this bloomin mouthwash is almost as bad lol!!
Thanks hun... I have had one before but can't remember much about it - must have been a good sedative!!! It was a couple of decades ago though lol!
Soon be over is what I'm holding onto.... How are you hun?
xxxxxxxxxxx
Fee xxxxxx
www.like2like.com
Why live life anticipating the bad things when you could be anticipating the good?
Good and bad things WILL happen!
Hi Fee
Glad it went well at the doctor's. At least it is likely that a change of diet (and the vile mouthwash lol!) will help with the symptoms you are experiencing.
Sounds like you had a good day. The tea shop sounds lovely, not that I could see myself eating any kind of cake without feeling bad about it at the moment [Sigh...].
<b id="quote">quote:</b id="quote"><table border="0" id="quote"><tr id="quote"><td class="quote" id="quote">Karen that sounds JUST what I need and I can't wait to get started on CBT! So just how DO you change the way you respond lol...</td id="quote"></tr id="quote"></table id="quote">
Well, since you asked... I will summarise some of my notes here but I am sure you will get to this once you start CBT.
1. Ask yourself whether you have evidence that the negative thought is not completely true at all times.
2. Consider what you would say to a friend if they had this thought. What would a friend say to you that might help cast doubt on the negative thought?
3. What has helped in the past when you have had this thought? Has anything helped to dismiss the thought or at least to allow for the possibility that the thought might not be true?
4. Think about how you have coped in similar situations/with similar thoughts in the past. Did the worst actually happen?
5. Look for any contradiction to the thought, no matter how small or seemingly insignificant. Note down the contradiction even if you do not yet believe it.
6. How do you think you will look back at the situation in 5 years from now? Would the situation/worry seem so difficult or important?
7. Consider the resources currently available to you. Are you underestimating your strengths?
8. Ask yourself whether you are taking responsibility for something you have no responsibility for or that is out of your control.
9. Keep a daily thought diary.
10. When considering the thoughts recorded ask yourself whether there is any evidence to support the thought or is the thought due to faulty thinking? ie are you catastrophising, mind reading, jumping to conclusions etc. Is this black and white thinking?
Hope that helps a bit. I have been trying to practise this for months and it is only recently that I am getting anywhere with it. It takes a lot of persistence and perseverence!
Thought you would have a laugh at the Nemo float [^]. Yes, I'd love to come to the place you go one day if you can get me a guest pass. I'm rather too self conscious about the changes in my body at the moment and definitely need a new costume as none of my clothes from last summer fit me anymore. I think I would need to wear a t-shirt over my costume or something.
<b id="quote">quote:</b id="quote"><table border="0" id="quote"><tr id="quote"><td class="quote" id="quote">Just getting there and parking was part of the challenge for me, so I'm just trying to get used to doing that regularly!!!</td id="quote"></tr id="quote"></table id="quote">
And you are doing well.
Hope you're having a good evening.
Karen xx
Hi Fee,
No that wasn't your longest post yet!
That mouthwash sounds nasty, think I was lucky with sucking one pastille a day.
I did the anti candida diet last year (actually I think it was the year before) as part of what the nutritionist I saw recommended. I didn't take the anti fungal supplements she recommended as I was not going to put my body through the die off reaction that can happen (that is the severe reaction some people have to the yeast dying not that it kills you). It did help although I don't think I had candida really, if I did it was mild. One nutritionist that has helped many ME patients told me to stop taking my asthma inhalers as steroids can cause candida - I decided on balance I'd rather have a bit of yeast in me than have a severe asthma attack. I really must get to grip with my food intolerances and allergies but there are so many things to avoid and I have no willpower right now.
Yes Professor Pinching is who I was referring to. In my magazine in the research section they seem to have recently found something else that is different in all the ME patients blood they tested for the trial, it is something to do with the immune system but can't remember what at this time of night.
I feel so lucky to have good ME advice here,they are closing alot of the services down here for ME but I'm ok as already in the system. It is amazing to think this illness can affect people so differently but then people are diffent in everything from their genetics to their attitudes. Of course once they find for sure what causes it that may change treatment radically.
I know you must be nervous about Thursday, you are coping so well. I would be a right basket case by now, in fact I wouldn't even have it done for the reason you are, I'd just cut out gluten and see if it helped as I am a wimp, so you are really brave in my eyes. I know you need the biopsy for the diagnosis though - just think it will soon be over and either way you can start cutting gluten out again.
Right I must go to bed soon as am waking up again now.
Night, sleep well.
Love and hugs,
Lisa x
P.S Piglet I am shocked [:O] I almost blushed when I read that [:I] - only almost though as being so innocent I didn't really understand ;).
Night all,
Lisa x
Hello you two!
Karen that was brilliant - it's weird it really helps to have someone put it down like that - some of it I was really aware of but there were other things there I hadn't thought of at all!
I have been trying to do some of it in my journal, and will be able to do it more now.... I misguidedly thought i would be able to stop the negative thoughts so in a way was missing the point!!
I really look forward to you coming over for a swim! That will be fab:D:D
Thanks lisa - I am brave aren't I[:O] lol!! I've had a lot of different tests in the past and am quite good at not worrying toooo much about them, but I do just get generalised anxiety just before. I have read something about the immune system in relation to ME recently but I can't find my last remaining memory cell at the moment lol!!
I'm exhausted so off to bed now - hope you are both ok,
nite nite xxxxxxxxxxxxx
Fee xxxxxx
www.like2like.com
Why live life anticipating the bad things when you could be anticipating the good?
Good and bad things WILL happen!
I am glad it helped Fee :).
We'll have to arrange something for when you've had your tests and when I know what is happening about my op.
Sounds like you had a good evening. Hope tomorrow is good for you.
Karen xx
:D:D:D:D
Love Piglet xx
"Supposing a tree fell down, Pooh, when we were underneath it?" said Piglet.
"Supposing it didn't," said Pooh after careful thought.
Hi Fee,
How are you today?
Thinking of you.
Lisa x
Just saying good morning Fee.
Karen xx
Morning all..
I'm tired and anxious today. My mouth feels awful - still using mouthwash but not convinced it's helping - feels sort of mucousy... (sorry[:I]). Really dreading tomorrow and scared I won't feel any better and I'm wasting my time....
What a ghastly grey day here too! Oh well I'm sure I'll feel better soon just because the damn test is over and done with!!
Hope you are all ok xxxxxxxxxxxx
Fee xxxxxx
www.like2like.com
Why live life anticipating the bad things when you could be anticipating the good?
Good and bad things WILL happen!
Hi Lucy!
Yes I hate the idea of getting too faddy but I've avoided it for too long - I had the 'other' thrush for 30 years nearly every month until I took Diflucan a couple of years ago and it went away.
Of course the trouble is the pharmacist said it was infected, the doctor wasn't sure and I don't feel convinced the mouthwash is working..... I wonder why the pharmacist didn't suggest anything? He's normally very good. Did you ever get that sort of mucousy thing in your mouth? (sorry!!!).
Thanks for your good wishes - I just can't wait till it's over now!!!!
Hope you are ok xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx
Fee xxxxxx
www.like2like.com
Why live life anticipating the bad things when you could be anticipating the good?
Good and bad things WILL happen!
Hi Fee,
Sorry you're having a bad day, you're right I'm sure you'll feel better when tomorrow is over with. I really hope all goes well tomorrow and that it gives you some answers. Even if you don't have CD you can cut out gluten as it obviously affects you and may be an intolerance. I will be there in spirit holding your hand tomorrow and helping you through it. Is someone going with you, I assume so if you're being sedated?
Lucy/Fee - the mouth thing sounds gross! Lol. I thought mucous from post nasal drip was bad enough.
Lucy - very brave to work in a chemist, I couldn't! Working in a vets is bad enough sometimes.
It is hard to not get faddy about food, I am allergic and intolerant to so many things, yet I can eat all the things I am allergic too without any major obvious reaction, although I've been told that it's still a strain on the body to deal with foods it's not happy with.
Fee - I was just reading another research article about ME in my newsletter, it was saying that they did a study on the spinal fluid of ME and fibromyalgia patients and they identified 16 proteins that are not in normal healthy peoples spinal fluid. Five of those proteins were only in the ME patients and they were there in every ME patient and no healthy people. They were saying this may be a diagnostic test one day - I'm sorry but I'm not having a spinal tap to get my ME diagnosed, no way!
I hope you feel better later, I know how horrible it is waiting for tests. I have had many tests in the last few years too and I didn't used to worry about tests until the time of the appt but not now. If I've had something done before and know what to expect I'm not too bad but it's still hard. I really think you're being so brave and coping so well.
Lisa x
Hi Fee
How are you this evening?
I think you will feel a lot better once tomorrow is over with. Keep going with the mouthwash even though it's horrible. Hopefully it will start helping soon.
Karen xx
Hi ya mate :D
Love Pig xx
"Supposing a tree fell down, Pooh, when we were underneath it?" said Piglet.
"Supposing it didn't," said Pooh after careful thought.
Thanks everyone.... I have had a long tedious anxious day, just doing housework, went to mum's to distract myself, itching itching itching, gargling, fretting....
Trying to keep myself occupied!
Hope you are ok xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx
Fee xxxxxx
www.like2like.com
Why live life anticipating the bad things when you could be anticipating the good?
Good and bad things WILL happen!
Hug Fee.
Well done for keeping distracted and busy. It is hard sometimes on days like this.
Karen xx
Thanks Karen - I need a hug!
I'm really struggling now - I have weird tingling sensations in my lips and chin - it so annoying - i relax through it but it just keeps coming back. I do like to get new and interesting symptoms lol!
It's all connected with my mouth - it's become the focal point for my anxiety today, it's like i something happens (this time an infection or whatever) and then that whole area goes into over-sensitised mode, as if I'm thinking about it all the time although I'm not consciously doing it.... it may be the rash, my chin does feel a bit warm and bumpy - but that's just the same, because I'm over sensitised!
It's so frustrating, I've really been trying hard not to do this today.
Oh roll on Friday.....
Fee xxxxxx
www.like2like.com
Why live life anticipating the bad things when you could be anticipating the good?
Good and bad things WILL happen!
Hi Fee,
Oh dear it must be so hard to gargle, scratch and fret all at once. I apologise for my weird humour and will sit on the naughty step for a while....
Seriously though I know it must be so hard for you, you've done well to keep busy and distract yourself. I expect you're right about your mouth and being over sensitive. Some mouthwashs can make your mouth feel a bit tingley too, as can hyperventilation.
I will be thinking of you tomorrow, I'm not sure what time your appt is but I will think of you all day. I hope you have someone going with you.
I do hope you manage to sleep tonight.
Big big (((hugs))) for my very dear and lovely Aunty Fee :)
Love Lisa x
lol lisa
headless chucks have nothing on me tonight!!!
Hope you are ok xxxxxxxxxxx
Fee xxxxxx
www.like2like.com
Why live life anticipating the bad things when you could be anticipating the good?
Good and bad things WILL happen!
Lol Fee!
Hope you're ok mate. I am thinking of you.
Lisa x
Good luck for tomorrow Fee. What time are you going in? I'll be thinking of you.
Karen xx
Thanks Lisa! (i'm a one-woman cartoon show tonight!).
Karen - I have to be there at 1.15, no food or drink for 6 hours prior:( Wish Chris was taking me but he's off to Egypt tomorrow morning (*expletive*) lol!
I am going to go and get in the bath and hope I can sleep - wish me luck!
nite nite xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx
Fee xxxxxx
www.like2like.com
Why live life anticipating the bad things when you could be anticipating the good?
Good and bad things WILL happen!
Hi Fee,
Have a nice bath and good luck tomorrow, I'll be thinking of you.
Sleep well, night Fee,
Love and hugs,
Lisa x
P.S Two woman cartoon, surely I must be in it too! Lol
Good luck for tomorrow Fee.
Will be thinking of you and sending positive vibes.
Karen xx
Good Luck Fee
Just wanted to say again that I'll be thinking of you and hope it goes well.
Karen xx
Thanks Karen!
I'm up and a bit nervous - but I've felt worse!! Can't wait to get it over with... Wish I could have a cup of tea!
I'll probably stay off here cos I don't want to catch anything lol!!!
Hope you have a good day... I don't know if I'll be on line afterwards, not sure how sedated I will be. But tomorrow.... GF, new start - I hope!!!
Thanks for all your support and I hope everyone else is ok xxxxxxxxxxxxxx
Fee xxxxxx
www.like2like.com
Why live life anticipating the bad things when you could be anticipating the good?
Good and bad things WILL happen!
Just poppng in to give you one of my best hugs for today.:D
I will be holding your hand and eyeing up the talent at the same time.[:I]
Bear in mind I have had hi-lights (cap method) that were worse, so you will be fine and it's worth it for the nice cup of tea and biscuit afterwards (not suggesting this becomes standard procedure in cafes though).
Big squeeze.
Love Piglet xxx
"Supposing a tree fell down, Pooh, when we were underneath it?" said Piglet.
"Supposing it didn't," said Pooh after careful thought.
Thanks Lucy and Piglet!!
I'm doing ok considering, but it's been a very long morning and I'm very hungry!! My mouth still feels a bit ropey so not drinking is rather unpleasant!
Piglet - to be honest I think I prefer this to the hairdressers!! I really really hate having my highlights done, have nearly run screaming with the foils in on a couple of occasions lol!! The whole leaning back over a sink is a nightmare with my vertigo - I get so dizzy and the girls who wash your hair are so.... well let's call it inexperienced!
Hope you are ok today xxxxxxxxxxxxxxx
Fee xxxxxx
www.like2like.com
Why live life anticipating the bad things when you could be anticipating the good?
Good and bad things WILL happen!
Hi Fee,
Just wanted to wish you well for this afternoon and say I'm thinking of you. I hope you get a nice hunky doctor! Lol.
I remember having my barium enema and the worst bit was not eating for 24 hours before, no actually the laxatives they give was the worst bit. Lol.
You are coping really well, clever Aunty Fee.
I definitely would prefer the hairdressers to the endo without a doubt!
Thinking of you, big ((((((Hugs)))))),
Lisa x
Thanks lisa! If they are hunky I'll have to avoid breathing on them!!!
it'll all be over in 3-4 hours hurrah!!!!
Fee xxxxxx
www.like2like.com
Why live life anticipating the bad things when you could be anticipating the good?
Good and bad things WILL happen!
Yes Fee it will soon be over!
I look forward to hearing from you when you are over the sedative.
Take care.
Lisa x
I really am contrary aren't I - I feel really positive, like once this is over and I give up gluten everything's going to be so much better, I might even get fit! I don't know where all this positivity is coming from, it's not that I'm not scared - I am - but I just feel suddenly really hopeful!
Fingers crossed! xxxxxx
Fee xxxxxx
www.like2like.com
Why live life anticipating the bad things when you could be anticipating the good?
Good and bad things WILL happen!
Go you - just the right attitude.:D:D
See ya later hun.
Piglet xxxx
"Supposing a tree fell down, Pooh, when we were underneath it?" said Piglet.
"Supposing it didn't," said Pooh after careful thought.
Still thinking of you Fee, I expect it's all over by now!
Lisa x
Welcome back lovie - you ok?????
Piglet xxx
Hi Fee,
Welcome back!
I hope you're ok - well as ok as you can be after having a long instrument down your throat [:O]! I bet you were all brave and coped really well. I expect you'll be sleepy for a while yet but just know I'm thinking of you.
Lisa x
Hi Fee
How are you? I hope all went well and you are now recovering quietly at home.
HUGS
Karen xx
Hello all
Well.....I was petrified by an incompetent nurse first (my friend was getting in a right old state!) so I definitely had the sedation. I got in a right old panic after the BP machine nearly blew up! Even sedated it still wasn't very pleasant and i do remember it all!
Then afterwards my throat was so sore and red they kept me in for an extra hour and got a doctor to look at me. No tea, no bix! I still can barely swallow - but I have a very sensitive throat anyway.
They found I had a hiatus hernia and inflammation of the duodenum but obviously I don't know about the Coeliac's yet.
I'll be glad to forget all this!!! I feel very very sorry for myself....
I hope you are all ok!
Fee xxxxxx
www.like2like.com
Why live life anticipating the bad things when you could be anticipating the good?
Good and bad things WILL happen!
Just want to give you a very large squeeze and say well done sweetheart for today.
I have to say my throat did feel sore for a day or two afterwards so perhaps a little honey (great for coating throats with a little natural lubricant) in some lemon tea.
If it's any consolation I think my pulse was over 130++ and Bp was almost off the scale too when I had mine. Funny thing is I looked so calm!!
You have done it now mate so a little spoiling wouldn't go amiss.
Biggest furriest hug ever for being such a brave soldier.:)
Piglet xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx
Welcome back Fee. I am glad it is all over now.
Just be gentle with yourself and take things easy for a couple of days. When do you find out about the coeliac's?
<b id="quote">quote:</b id="quote"><table border="0" id="quote"><tr id="quote"><td class="quote" id="quote">If it's any consolation I think my pulse was over 130++ and Bp was almost off the scale too when I had mine. Funny thing is I looked so calm!!<div align="right">Originally posted by Piglet - 09 March 2006 : 18:59:11</div id="right">
</td id="quote"></tr id="quote"></table id="quote">
Going into hospital has this effect on me too. It is a pretty stressful situation after all.
Gentle hugs Fee.
Karen xx
Hi Fee,
First I want to give you a big (((hug))) for being so brave. It sounds pretty unpleasant, hope I never need it done. It is over now though and you did so well. You can now concentrate on cutting out gluten whatever the result is.
I am also one of the blowing up bp machines gang, and I dread to think what my pulse is at the hospital sometimes.
I expect you've had a sleepy evening after the sedation and will probably sleep well tonight. Look after yourself and give yourself a bit of extra TLC. Honey is really good for the throat especially if it's manuka honey.
Thinking of you.
Lisa x
Night hun :):)
Piglet xxx
Thank you all!
I have just had some rice pud and my friend has gone home so I am going to try and get to bed... My throat is agony and I feel very traumatised - hope I feel better tomorrow!
Will catch up with you all properly then am a bit dopey!!!!
xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx
Fee xxxxxx
www.like2like.com
Why live life anticipating the bad things when you could be anticipating the good?
Good and bad things WILL happen!
Just saying goodnight Fee.
I hope you are recovering well and get a good night's sleep.
Karen xx
Lucy hun - whilst I wouldn't say it was a barrel of laughs neither is it truly dreadful either.
I have had two now, albeit 20 years apart and things have come on in leaps and bounds since then.
They do spray your throat to numb it, which actually was the worst bit for me since I didn't like the 'can't feel the back of your throat to swallow' bit.
The whole thing is over very quickly (matter of a minute) and the staff who I had were super with me - inside I let go and realised I could breathe so don't panic.
Lucy if I can do it and do it without sedation then anyone can.
Don't feel worried mate its a useful way of finding out what the problem is or even if there is one.
Love Piglet xx
"Supposing a tree fell down, Pooh, when we were underneath it?" said Piglet.
"Supposing it didn't," said Pooh after careful thought.
Morning Fee,
How are you feeling today? I hope you had a good sleep and that the throat is not as sore now.
Lucy - I did wonder if reading that would worry you more. I hope Piglets advice helped reassure you. My Dad has had it done sedated and he wasn't aware of a thing and didn't even have a sore throat afterwards, we are all different so what is bad for one person will be fine for another.
Even if it is uncomfortable for a few minutes that can be better than constant worrying about symptoms, at least you will know if there is a problem or get the reassurance that you are ok.
Lisa x
Hi Fee,
Just checking up here to see what was up with you.
I can imagine you are still feeling so yuk at the moment. The positive thing is that you have had some treatment.
I hope you can attend this planned meet-up even if you cannot co-ordinate it.
((BIG HUGS))
Ray
Hi Fee
How are you feeling today? I hope you are recovering and taking things easy at home.
I too saw your post about the meet-up. Don't worry about it. You do have a lot of things going on at the moment. I can't really commit either at present until I know what's happening about my hospital admission. I might not feel up to going if I don't have the op until the end of April.
More hugs for you Fee. Have been thinking of you today.
Karen xx
Still thinking of you Aunty Fee.
I hope you're feeling ok today.
Lisa x
Hi all
I am in a really bad way. Been to Doc and got antibiotics. Feel totally traumatised, terrified and really unwell. I can just about swallow liquids. The doctor thinks I my have had an allergic reaction to the throt spray.
I don't want to frighten Lucy, they do 60 a day in there and I was the only one this happened to!
I can't stop shaking, the anxiety has completely overwhelmed me. Sarah has also got an infection and Mark is really worried about her.
I feel so lonely - I think if I had money I would pay for a nurse to come and look after me! Chris is away and so are two of my other close friends that I rely on. I had no idea it could be as traumatic as this.
I have worked out that there are several different endoscopies - done in different ways - I had one before with no problem at all!
I just seem to be over-sensitised to everything at the moment. I am just praying I feel better tomorrow and it doesn't look so awful....
Sorry everyone - I do feel a bit of a failure in some stupid way....
Hope you are all ok xxxxxxxxx
Fee xxxxxx
www.like2like.com
Why live life anticipating the bad things when you could be anticipating the good?
Good and bad things WILL happen!
<b id="quote">quote:</b id="quote"><table border="0" id="quote"><tr id="quote"><td class="quote" id="quote">Hi all
Sorry everyone - I do feel a bit of a failure in some stupid way....
<div align="right">Originally posted by feege - 10 March 2006 : 17:29:24</div id="right">
</td id="quote"></tr id="quote"></table id="quote">
Hi Fee,
Firstly you are NOT a failure and have nothing to be sorry for ok. You are a strong lovely woman who is going through a hard time.
I'm glad you managed to get to the docs, I hope the antibiotics help, I guess they will if you have an infection somewhere.
Often procedures like yesterday heighten our anxiety and as we all know we can feel worse afterwards.
Fee I so wished I was living closer to you, I would come over and nurse you myself if I could, honest I would!
Big big hugs and lots of positive vibes are being sent to you. Hang in there, things will get better again however bad they seen right now.
I was sorry to hear about Sarah too, my thoughts are with her and Mark. I hope she gets over her infection soon - how worrying it must be for everyone.
Love and hugs,
Lisa x
Thanks lisa - i wish you were near here too!! It's good to know you guys are here xxxxxxxxxxx
Fee xxxxxx
www.like2like.com
Why live life anticipating the bad things when you could be anticipating the good?
Good and bad things WILL happen!
Fee hun the biggest hug ever. :D:D:D
You are absolutely not a failure in anyway at all - you had a horrid day yesterday and sometimes we need people around us to take the edge off it.
My mate who came with me when I had mine done said she knew I was ok cos when she came to pick me up I couldn't stop talking and taking her through the whole process, whereas she couldn't get a word out of me on the trip there.
I often think we need to talk to get it out of our systems and quantify it in our minds. You want to hear my birth stories mate [:I]:D:D.
I am here tonight if you want me to phone you - it would have to be on the big phone, not your mob, as we have a block on the phone to mobs (due to a teenage piglet losing track of all reality and running up a bill that nearly had me back on Prozac some years ago)!!!
You are going to be fine, just let your head and body catch up with each other.
Love Piglet xxx
"Supposing a tree fell down, Pooh, when we were underneath it?" said Piglet.
"Supposing it didn't," said Pooh after careful thought.
Fee, so sorry I didn't answer your text message earlier. I've only just read it as I fell asleep (have been feeling sick myself today).
Hopefully the medication from the doctor will start to take effect soon and you will feel a little better tomorrow.
This is in NO way failure Fee. You have so many things going on at the moment and feeling so ill is the final straw.
Sorry to hear about Sarah too. That's extra worry for both you and Mark.
Hope you are feeling better hon.
Hugs.
Karen xx
Powered by vBulletin® Version 4.2.5 Copyright © 2024 vBulletin Solutions Inc. All rights reserved.