Hi. Thought I'd better introduce myself . . .

[nateonaplate]

Hello. I'm Nate - found my way here via The Observer. [^]

A little about myself, if anyone's interested. I had my first anxieties when I was about 8 or nine - consisting mainly of 'night terrors'.

In my teens I smoked a lot of pot and took halucinagens. One sunday afternoon aged 18, whilst a little high, I experienced my first panic attack. It lasted for an inordinate number of hours (coming in waves, over and over) and followed by the longest sleep I have ever had. I have always described that moment as 'opening a door that I never should have opened'.

I have had panic attacks, generalised anxiety and severely restricting agoraphopbia ever since (12 years). It has been a controlling factor in my life, and, since getting married and having children, in their lives too. The guilt is progressing more and more, and I often feel that if only I had not falen in love and had children, I could happily curl-up and let the world get on without me - but those feelings no longer exist - I want to move on, progress and start to live life to the full. I want to see places, people and things that have been utterly off-limits.

I have been on many anti-depressents/beta bl;ockers etc etc - and I think they may have helped at some point, but I have been without medication (my choice) for three years now - and I'm happy with that . . . however, I drink every evening, because itmeans I can sleep - so I'm probably an alcoholic (the thought of going to bed without having had alcohol scares me).

Last year, when already starting to feel better, I visited a hypnotherapist for the first time. That, and with the new progressive mind-set I had given myself, I managed to get out of my small town for the first time in 4 years. [^] . Since then I have pushed myself a little, taking on board the 'logic' of the panic, its hormonal/chemical base and the fact that IT WON'T KILL ME, even, sometimes, taunting a panic to come on to prove to myself that it'll hurt, but it won't do for me!

I am still, very much, an agoraphobic. I cannot travel on motorways, I cannot go further than, say 20 miles on a good day, 2 miles on a bad day. I can ONLY drive myself. I cannot travel on trains, buses, coaches, aeroplanes - nothing other than a car I am in control of. This, coupled with my dependence on alcohol (which is an anxiety-based dependence, I am sure) is why I am here. Just one or two more hurdles and maybe - just maybe I'll be over it - and hopefully I can stand as a testement to those who see there is no end to this - I felt it wwas going to be a lifetime illness - I now know it won't. [8D]

Sorry for going on[:I]

Are there many chaps on the forum? Just wondering. [:o)]

Nate

[trac67]

Hi Nate,

welcome to the form, you will get a lot of good advice here and make some new friends.

Can I ask when you saw the article in The Observer ?

And don't worry you arent alone , we have 717 registered males on the forum LOL.

Take care

Trac xx

'Live your life with arms wide open, today is where your book begins, the rest is still unwritten'

[nateonaplate]

<b id="quote">quote:</b id="quote"><table border="0" id="quote"><tr id="quote"><td class="quote" id="quote">Hi Nate,

welcome to the form, you will get a lot of good advice here and make some new friends.

Can I ask when you saw the article in The Observer ?

And don't worry you arent alone , we have 717 registered males on the forum LOL.

Take care

Trac xx

'Live your life with arms wide open, today is where your book begins, the rest is still unwritten'

<div align="right">Originally posted by trac67 - 20 February 2006 : 12:04:17</div id="right">
</td id="quote"></tr id="quote"></table id="quote">

It was in the Observer Magazine last Sunday (12/2) in the piece 'How can I overcome Panic Attacks?", but they printed the wrong website address (nopanic.com) and printed a correction this sunday in the main body of the paper. HTH[^]

Nate

[jackie]

nate, welcome. you will meet loads of people here as i have over the past few weeks. a quick question. my eyes nearly popped out of my head when you mentioned night terrors. i suffered these as a child but gradually grew out of them. now i have a bad health anxiety but never put the two together. do you feel yours are linked. never heard of anyone going through them b4. they were never explained and i never new why i took them . they were terrible things but i gradually learned to cope with them then they dissapeared.

anyway sorry to go on, just never heard of anyone else b4, so hi and welcome
jackie

[tara]

Hi nate welcome

[seh1980]

Welcome aboard!! :D

"If life were simple, word would have got around"

[Karen]

Hi Nate

Welcome to the forum.

Karen



Happiness is not a state to arrive at but a manner of travelling.

[nomorepanic]

Hi Nate

A warm welcome aboard.

You have a lot of issues the same as mine with regard to fears of public transport and too only drive myself which itself has issues.

You may like to read my story at .... Nicola's Personal Story (http://www.nomorepanic.co.uk/NMPcms.php?nmppage=mystory)

I am also having CBT for my driving issues and that post can be found at ....

CBT therapy for driving problems - my diary (http://www.nomorepanic.co.uk/showthread.php?t=7162)

Hope these help.

Ask any questions you want to and will do our best to reply.

Nicola

[sal]

Hi Nate

Welcome aboard Yeah there are loads of chaps and we are all here to help you.

Love Sal xx


Dont mess up the best things in your life, just because at present you are unsure who you are.


"Life is a distance and to travel that distance you were given the strength and guidance to do so".

[jill]

Hi Nate,

WELCOME TO THE SITE :D

There are lots of nice people here who will help and support you.

TAKE CARE

LOVE JILLXX

When you fear something,
learn as much about it as you can.
Knowledge conquers fear.

[feege]

Hi Nate

Welcome to the site - you sound like you have got your head around the issues involved and you will find loads of people here who understand and will be happy to help you progress!

Anxiety tends to manifest itself in lots of ways and I have often thought that the pressure on men not to admit to their feelings leads them to alcohol dependence more often than women (though obviously not exclusively!).

As a life long feminist I have hated admitting my anxiety and panic symptoms - loathing the menopausal, neurotic, hypochondriac image of a middle aged woman! This site has helped me to lose all of that rubbish and realise it is something that can happen to anybody, any time.... and that accepting it and really using the tools around can lead to complete recovery...

Sorry - waffling on your welcome thread - good luck!!!!

fee
xx

[Davysmum]

Hi Nate, I just joined today and carry my own guilt about how my situation affects my family.
I too had night terrors as a child - back then I just sort of assumed everyone else did :D Since really thinking about it (which is very hard, part of my brain seems to step in and block me!) I realise that mine were about the deaths of 3 people close to me and the behaviour of my severely depressed mother.

[nateonaplate]

Thanks for all the comments - greatly appreciated.

As for night-terrors, they always seemed inherently linked in my mind, mainly because the fear of some kind of death existed both in those and in the panics attacks i still occasionally have. Night terors forme were always claustrophobic, and very, very vivid. Interestingly, I never assumed that anyone else had them, and that i felt especially picked out to suffer from them (a narcissism which existed in me for many years - phsychiatrists would say a narcissistic personality disorder, but I think for many, many people it is just not realising how many people suffer from the same thing (and consequently, all power to this site which shows that MANY do).

I have always had difficulties understanding health anxiety, because I always felt that anyone with panic attacks must automatically assume something is wrong with them health wise (heart, lungs, brains, whatever it may be). I know that now to be wrong irt my mother who has been agorophobic all her adult life and has no fear of death or illness, just phobophobia and agoraphobia - but is there an issue of learned behaviour on my part?

And then the alcoholism.

Yes, it may be true to say that more men are inclined to hide their anxieties under a bushel (and, perhaps, the higher suicide rates for young men are a consequence of this) and alcohol is an invisible crutch. I really don;t know.

I feel unnerved that I am exploring all these factors in my anxieties in this privately public forum, but also liberated, and I am so pleased that offers of help exhude from you all.

Sorry if I've skirted over comments people have made in response to my introduction - i would love to address them in more detail, but need to get myhead around the many forums in here.

Thanks again!

Nate

[jackie]

yes nate, the terrors you describe are just like mine were, so young though i have never new why they ever happened so i just put then to the back of my mind. horrible things ans claustrophobic, always felt i was being swallowed. incidentally i was always afraid of being smothered as a child, does that sound like a reason.

anyway just interested to no someone who had them not wanting to take away fron our issues today

talk anytime
jackie

[clickaway]

Hi Nate, and welcome to the site.

Interesting to learn that you found us via the Observer, just as loads are tracking us down via Tuesday's Mail [8D]

My panics and anxieties have manifested themselves in all sorts of ways, including some odd night terrors. My mind is certainly very disturbed at night.

Oh, and btw, I'm male, and you're right, most of us seem to keep a low profile here - maybe this posting is part of my feminine side:D

Take Care,


Ray
http://www.anxietyrelease.org.uk/

And when you get the choice to sit it out or dance, I hope you dance.
~Mark Sanders and Tia Sillers

[Paddington]

hi nate,i am a new member too,only just understanding how this works,the site i mean.I to use the booze,in fact i was at one time drinkink so much i found myself in a stream up to my neck in freezing water!not on a night out ,i was walking the dog in the dark and as i was slewed was not scared.i donr abuse as i did in fact of late i dont drink any where near as much,not every night at ant rate,you know i have a bottle of wine in my kitchen as we speak i would have downed it by now to help me sleep,but as i am on this site i have not felt the need.i do believe that chating with others in the same boat tskes away the lonliness of the condition.you have come soo far nate,well done,i see a glittering future ahead,dont look back ever or your life has gone in pointless regret.love Mary-Rose.xx

[monkee]

HI Nate .... Just spoke with nate via the java chat thing from this site. Nice to met you bud. GL

[Alexandra]

Hi Nate

Welcome to the forum

Grr newspapers not printing the right web address for this site i dunno (least they did corrext it though) Your here now & thats all that matters you will get some really sound advice on here.

Take good care



Alexandra

[Meg]

Hi Nate and welcome

Sounds like you may have some alcohol dependence but not to alcoholic levels.

Sounds like there is lots we can offer you. You've got a great attitude which helps enormously

Do read up on previous threads and let us know where you find information gaps.

Meg
www.anxietymanagementltd.com

Your anxiety is the human representation of the pictures that you paint using your many vivid colours of revolving and reoccurring thoughts.
How big is your gallery ?