I can't cope anymore

[daisycake]

I can't do this anymore. I feel totally and utterly alone and I can't see a way out of it , there is nothing good anymore and I don't see anything good ever happening. I don't know what to do I live my life in fear of dying and the same for everyone else but I can't keep living here either. Please can someone please help. I told my doctor I was struggling and she said doing soemthing drastic is not the answer but what can I do? I'm really frightened and I don't know what to do. My mum has told me to keep my problems to myself and not to talk to her anymore so I'm posting it here.

[cherbear32]

Daisycake

I'm sorry to hear about what your mum said. Unfortunately, people do not understand how we feel. My family/friends and boyfriend really do not understand and this leaves me feeling really isolated. But you need to know you really are not alone. Try and accept people don't understand rather than feel frustrated by it or let it bother you. People can only understand these things when they have been through it. I've often thought i can't continue like this anymore - but you need to know you won't always feel like this. With medication and other therapy you will be fine. Take care

[Baggs]

I believe that talking helps. I would be lost without the chatroom. Maybe give it a try. All the best. Baggs.

[Thumbelina]

Dear daisycakes, it fells like that only but it's not like that in reality, you can cope you have a lot of strength wihin you, you should talk about it as much as you need, my mam is also like your mam oldschool, bless them, but therefore you can talk to people who have been through he same.

[blueangel]

I do know how you're feeling; I know I'm struggling dreadfully at the moment. My partner is wonderful, but I don't want to constantly burden him with my whinging as it doesn't seem fair.

My anxiety is always worse when I'm having to deal with things that are out of my control. At the moment I have problems at work, mega-problems with trying to get a divorce (my soon-to-be ex-husband won't pay the solicitor!) and I'm trying to help bring up two kids that aren't mine; I know nothing about children and am totally un-maternal, which really doesn't help.

I always assume that when things go wrong, that somehow it's my fault, which I realise is completely irrational. But hardwiring is so hard to break, and I was brought up to feel guilty for everything. I've managed to break away from a lot of the bad conditioning I had as a child, but some of it just seems impossible to get past, and that distresses me too as it makes me feel inadequate.

[dodo]

My husband is very tollerant but I am using the word tollerant as he gets quite frustrated when I go on about what disease I might have today. He's more of a laid back kind of person who really can't understand how somelike like us think. He cannot understand that I don't choose to be like this, it is out of my control. Sometimes I get the feeling he thinks I do it for attention, and on one occassion didn't deny such when I asked him.

It is so hard to get a handle on and I know how you feel. You cannot imagine going through the rest of your life 'waiting to die'. But it is my fear of death that keeps this going. I have a wonderful husband a baby daughter and I get so upset just thinking about not being here with them that I think it makes me worse.

[blueangel]

I think this is it entirely dodo; it's the feeling that life is all about just waiting for something to go wrong. I can't remember when I didn't feel that way; it's been with me for most of my life.

[dodo]

I've certainly been like it for about 5-6 years now. Sometimes it improves and goes away and then comes back to bite me on the bum and remind me it's still there. Right now it's getting pretty silly. It's gone from worrying about my heart to worrying about everythign again. It's exactly what the Dr said to me - 'when we tell you finally there's nothing wrong with your heart, will you then start worrying about other diseases again' I said no no of course not and what do I find myself doing???

[blueangel]

I think this is the horrible cycle we all get ourselves into; you get rid of one set of symptoms and then something else will appear to take its place, and until you break it, you get no peace at all from your own mind.

[daisycake]

thanks everyone for the support things are a bit happier tonight although my right arm feels all weird and numb but i can type with it and lift it above my head so i presume it's ok. away on holiday tommorow, hopefully that will help things,.. going to try see doctor when i get home as well and see what she says x

[davelee]

ít's whєn thíngs sєєm wσrst thαt чσu must nσt quít