Does it EVER End ?

[Ruby Tuesday]

I have numerous MH problems and PTSD is part of them. I have tried in all ways possible to 'get better' but I always fail. Since a dreadful experience with 'therapy' 6 years ago I have literally been just existing day-to-day in almost complete isolation.

In the past things have become very 'unsafe' for me and I have been hospitalised. I really thought I would not get that bad again but I have. Only this time the thought of being in hospital just exacerbates my terror as my horrific experience 6 years ago still has a profound effect on me. It was a serious event and it involved me being sexually assaulted. Then the consequent legal proceedings dragged on for TWO YEARS !!

I really feel I cant cope and I am absolutely terrified :sad:

[Ruby Tuesday]

I guess no-one knows.................

[calm]

i do hope so....with the help of people around you and this most wonderful site...we will overcome xxxxx

[MidnightCalm]

We can only hope. x

[calm]

i forgot to say i had very major surgery four years ago which affected my whole life....and my little girls life....they think that i am suffering from P.T.S.D. and you know wot i think they are right.....when we go through such a horrific time it can only come back to haunt us xxxx you are not alone xxxx we are all here for you xxxx

[Thumbelina]

Hi Ruby and the other guys,

Emotional and physical trauma can follow us for a long time and one of the first steps is aknowledging within ourselves at least the impact it has on us. If we keep denying to ourselves that it doesnt bother us, that what bothers us is something else - then its just postpones the resolution moment.

You must have had your hands full with difficulties Ruby, it can also make you stronger THOUGH if you turn it around.

I hope the worrying will end for you sooner than you think.

[calm]

Thank you thumbalina for your words xxxx

[annette1]

Hi Ruby

I'm sorry to say there is no actual end to PTSD as there is no cure, but there is a road to recover.

I'm sorry you had a bad experience with therapy going into it is a very difficult decision to make but please be reasurred that not all therapists are the same & maybe you weren't ready to recover.

I have been in therapy for the past 18mth with a trauma psychologist, we've used a mix of EMDR, focusing & talk therapies & a little CBT. I feel so different to the person who sat terrified in my first meeting with her, unable to speak, sit still or work. I'd already had 6mths counselling & was feeling like I would never feel any different.

Therapy (together with meds) has been life changing for me & I will always be grateful to my psych for pushing me through the barriers that I thought were impossible but were holding me back from reprocessing my traumas. During therapy she advised me to find something that gave me comfort & to carry it with me then, during times of distress to hold it & take comfort from it, for me it was a toy my father bought me, its still in my bag, i dont need to hold it anymore just knowing its there is enough to get me through.
I now consider myself well into recovery, ok I still have some symptoms but I have learnt to manage them & know that I have to work hard to keep myself well through relaxation, challenging my negative thoughts & managing my symptoms. I have been warned that I will have setbacks, but for now I'm enjoying the freedom I've worked so hard to gain & the friendships & support I have found along the way.

I hope you and others too will find a way to recover, it takes time & patience but is very rewarding.

In the meantime be kind to yourself, find a little time each day just to be you, don't beat yourself up because of your symptoms, they are a normal reaction to abnormal events.

Take care & stay strong, you will get through this.
Annette x