Does anyone else have this?

[linworth]

Hi
its me again, i am needing a lot of reassurance at the moment ! as i have said previously i had an increase in meds a few weeks ago, and sent my anxiety through the roof, actually terrified, of losing my mind, a deep dark impending doom etc.. Anyway i reduced back down last saturday and iam still making the decision if i am going to change meds or stay on my normal dose, Had a better day today, woke with the impending doom , but fought it off and took kids to school, i have not felt the overwhelming depression today, just been very agigtated waiting for it to come back, so have not been able to relax, although at some points it all seems like a bad dream. But just before the awful feeling washed over me, its horrible, makes me want to cry, run away etcc.. its a fear of... i dont quite know what, it like the fear i had at the weekend when i was bad, impending doom, self loathing, i dont exist??? i am losing my mind?? its awful its like the worst thing in the world is happening, but obviously it isnt. Can anyone please explain? i have only been having these intense fears since i upped the meds and since i have decreased, they are getting a bit less! what i would give and i suppose everyone on here would give just to wake in the morning and not have to think about what they are feeling !! take care lynne x

[JT69]

Hi Lynne,

I think the feelings you describe are symtoms of anxiety and fear, something triggers them off and then cos you are aware of them they escilate (if that makes sense)?? I have felt similiar feelings and know that dwelling on them (and I know that cant be helped) seems to then feed them...so difficult to explain but I do know what you mean. The feeling of losing your mind is horrible....along with the intense fear of what??? We just dont know ....it just happens.

Are you able to distract yourself and keep busy? I know sometimes this is so much easier said than done and the last thing you feel like doing but it does help. I find I have to force myself sometimes and then later on do feel better for it.

I think that these feelings will become less and less now you hae reduced your meds...but will just take time.

I am suffering again myself with anxiety in the mornings which is particularly a pain (today it lasted into the afternoon) I felt spaced out and a sense of doom...it scared the hell out of me...just had to shake it off!!

Are you still working at the moment hun?

I do wish you better soon...you certainly have been through the mill lately.

Take care
Jo.xx

[linworth]

HI jo

No been off work for two weeks, i am so desperate to get my life back, I have never ever felt fear like this, it literally paralyzes me, then i question my sanity, so yes it goes round in circles, but i am trying to distract myself, hoovering !!! i think it has shocked me to the core what has happened over the last few weeks, and fingers crossed this will all become a distant nightmare! I am sorry your anxiety has reared again, but you know it will just be a blip and will pass. It is the fear of what??? that is mind boggling, if it was just the fear of what if i cant do this or that, i could handle it, but this black black feeling is awful, it then leads to despair, but iam determind to get better, when i have it i feel so alone, which is a strange feeling, because i cant put it into words and i just want someone to take it away, finger crossed it will go . take care xxxx

[daydreamer]

Hi.

I know how you are feeling, I had it today actually after I'd had a panic attack. It is hard to describe but I think many people on here have felt the same at some point, I think we all fear that feeling.

I also had this when I increased my meds the first time I took them and it went after a month of so. This second time around it also happened again when I tried to increase, however I found it so disturbing that I stuck with the lower dose, which is doing nothing for me!

I am pretty sure that if you persevere with them the feeling will pass, but thats never a guarantee. I didnt manage to stick with the increased dose this time for the very reason you stated, kinda wish I had though, if only to see whether it would have made me any better. Im still tempted to try again but like you, I feel Ive reached a level of tolerability, to feel worse again would really make me feel despair too.

Its just so annoying though, take them and feel worse, dont take them and still feel bad - catch 22. I feel for you I really do, hopefully you'll start to see an improvement soon and having a positive attitude like you do is definitely going to help too. Good Luck