bit of everything I think

[skyblue]

Hi all

Not posted for a while but just felt I needed to get this out of my head,...
Iv suffered from panic attacks for what seems like forever,and have dealt with it best way i can,but lately my mood is so up and down....

One day i just want to sit on the sofa not talk,or deal with anyone/thing..then feel guilty

another day screwd up with panic,not always full blown but that horrid churning,cant settle,got the fidgets.

another day bring it on up for anything,even the dentist...

seems bit confusing,am i depressed,or anxious,or is it all in my head and its none of the above and im experiencing the same as most people do, who dont have panic etc everyday,and its all in my head.

why do i have to even bother with how i feel,why cant i just get on with it and not think about it,and should i just accept it.

im sorry if this makes no sense,just a bit mixed up

love to all

skyxx:flowers:

[jothenurse]

Distraction really helps for me. If I am starting to have some tachycardia from being panicky, doing a crossword puzzle, or doing some things on the computer help. When I'm at work, just trying to stay busy helps. It is hard -sometimes you feel pretty good and other times, like last night I woke up at 3:30 AM with my pulse fast and very panicky - had to watch tv for an hour to be able to keep myself from having a big panic attack. It's frustrating. I know books like Claire Weekes say to accept and float through it. Sometimes I have trouble just accepting the way I feel because I so badly want to not feel this anxiety and panic every day. I am told by my counselor that the more I challenge it (go out and do things, go to work, not be dependent on having to have people around, especially at night (I live by myself), the faster the anxiety will get better. I have been doing a lot of challenging - mowed the lawn yesterday even though I get scared when my pulse goes up because part of my panic is tachycardia, but I still feel the anxiety. If I look back though a couple of months ago, then I do have to recognize that I do feel better. It's hard when you just want the anxiety/panic to go away.