gnome
02-08-10, 23:47
Hello All,
I am new to this forum and wanted to say hello. I hope that by joining you all it helps me find ways to cope and hopefully some of you might find my story helpful in some way by knowing that you are not alone.
I am a 27 year old female. I guess I suffer from 'typical' health anxiety and have done for a about 10 years or so, it having got worse with knowledge! Too much knowledge is a bad thing sometimes.....
I believe my problem was originally triggered from what has now been diagnosed as IBS. I kept the pain secret for many years, petrified of what may be causing it, thinking it was the worst of course! Even once it was diagnosed I found it hard to believe that such pain could be caused by not much at all. To this day I can hardly run as it causes pain, yet this started when I was about 17. So that was many years of wasted time worrying about it and feeling that it was something far more serious.
But this is the behavioural cycle that I find hard to break. I have a wonderful family, job, boyfriend and a generally happy person. So much so that no one would ever know the level of my fears and obsession. But my mind is almost obsessed with the possibility of ill health. I am not always thinking I have particular symptoms which go with an illness (although I do this as well!). It is this 'waiting for something serious' which now occupies most of my time and is quite frankly soul destroying.
I find it hard when I see people so carefree. I wish I could be like that too and just accept that ill health and death comes to us all and we should just be thankful for what we have. But I cannot do this. There is always the background fear of the inevitable which I cannot seem to cope with. At the moment I am preoccupied with asbestos and the fact that I have in no doubt inhaled a fair amount. This along with regretting having smoked and causing possible damage. Plus strange pain in my ribs and thinking it is lung cancer. Along with the pains in my abdomen. I shall stop there!
I truly could go on but I think that is enough of an intro for now. If anyone suffers from similar or have ever found a self-help book for this sort of problem which they thought was helpful, then please let me know.
I just want to enjoy life accepting that sometimes things cannot be feared and controlled. I am always told by those trying to help that you can't worry over things like this. But it isn't always that simple....
I am new to this forum and wanted to say hello. I hope that by joining you all it helps me find ways to cope and hopefully some of you might find my story helpful in some way by knowing that you are not alone.
I am a 27 year old female. I guess I suffer from 'typical' health anxiety and have done for a about 10 years or so, it having got worse with knowledge! Too much knowledge is a bad thing sometimes.....
I believe my problem was originally triggered from what has now been diagnosed as IBS. I kept the pain secret for many years, petrified of what may be causing it, thinking it was the worst of course! Even once it was diagnosed I found it hard to believe that such pain could be caused by not much at all. To this day I can hardly run as it causes pain, yet this started when I was about 17. So that was many years of wasted time worrying about it and feeling that it was something far more serious.
But this is the behavioural cycle that I find hard to break. I have a wonderful family, job, boyfriend and a generally happy person. So much so that no one would ever know the level of my fears and obsession. But my mind is almost obsessed with the possibility of ill health. I am not always thinking I have particular symptoms which go with an illness (although I do this as well!). It is this 'waiting for something serious' which now occupies most of my time and is quite frankly soul destroying.
I find it hard when I see people so carefree. I wish I could be like that too and just accept that ill health and death comes to us all and we should just be thankful for what we have. But I cannot do this. There is always the background fear of the inevitable which I cannot seem to cope with. At the moment I am preoccupied with asbestos and the fact that I have in no doubt inhaled a fair amount. This along with regretting having smoked and causing possible damage. Plus strange pain in my ribs and thinking it is lung cancer. Along with the pains in my abdomen. I shall stop there!
I truly could go on but I think that is enough of an intro for now. If anyone suffers from similar or have ever found a self-help book for this sort of problem which they thought was helpful, then please let me know.
I just want to enjoy life accepting that sometimes things cannot be feared and controlled. I am always told by those trying to help that you can't worry over things like this. But it isn't always that simple....