Feeling physically sick

[caz1625]

Morning guys

Sorry to moan but I am having such a bad day. Got an appointment today to start divorce proceedings and I don't know if I can do it.
I've been awake most of the night and now have pains in my chest and am having major panic attacks.
This is just so hard.

Carol x

[verity]

Awww Hun, sorry to hear how bad your feeling. What helps your body to calm down? I find that going for a walk helps to burn off the adrenalin.
Can someone go with you to the appointment for support?

[diane07]

Aww Carol,

I know how horrible it feels, but i went through this myself not that long ago and it wasn't as bad as i thought, just wanted to send you a :hugs:and let you know that we will help you through.

di x

[caz1625]

Thanks guys I know I will be ok once I get the ball rolling it's just that initial step.
Can't go for a walk as I'm agoraphobic. The lawyer is coming to see me at the house so that makes it a bit easier.
I have just got myself into such a state..............stupid woman!!!

Carol x

[verity]

Awww hun if you can't go for a walk then try putting some of your favorite music on a singing your heart out! Anything to distract you for a while xx

[caz1625]

How did you know? I've got Diana Ross blaring right now. Mind you it maybe wasn't the best choice.............Stop in the Name of Love maybe isn't the best song to be listening to :D but it has made me smile.

Carol xx

[verity]

Hahaha Music is a great healer! Put I will survive on girl!!!

[caz1625]

Oh I will survive............I'm a tough cookie. If I can survive panic attacks for 25yrs I can do this.
I'm just so frightened of the back lash that is going to come. He has no idea I am filing for divorce! I need to do it for me and the kids but he is going to flip his lid.

Carol xx

[verity]

Yes you can do it! living and coping with panic does make us stronger than most would think.
When he flips his lid keep calm and don't bite back, let him throw a tantrum but keep yourself surrounded by loved ones. If he gets abusive just ignore him and don't have any contact until he promises to calm down.

[caz1625]

Thanks Verity I know what you are saying is right. I have no contact with him as you can not talk to him reasonably. To say that he acts like a 2yr old is an understatement!!!
I have been ignoring his abusive texts and emails for months now and have managed not to answer any of them. Quite proud of myself really as it is so tempting to tell him exactly what I think of him :D
We were together for 32yrs and married for 25 so it's quite hard to call an end to it but I know its what I want and know it's what's best for me. It doesn't make it any easier to do though.

Carol x