Why do we worry about our health?

[Bill]

Basically, it's a fear of dying but why can't we just accept and enjoy life?

Just some thoughts because this is something I've often suffered from myself.

I've always been sensitive so anything "bad" I hear about always seems to affect me. I've also always felt insecure and I'm sure this then creates fear which then makes us worry because we then also lack confidence in ourselves. When we lack confidence, we tend to get more stressed because we then doubt our own abilities. When we feel more stressed, we then tend to worry more because stress triggers our fears....and the one thing we fear most because it's most important, is our life which I think is why we then keep worryig about our health.

However, when we feel relaxed and are enjoying doing things, we tend not to worry so much because we don't feel stressed and so we then forget about health worries.

So in other words, I think in alot of cases our personalities make us vulnerable to feeling stressed, however there are exceptions because we don't all have the same personality traits but anxiety can still affect us in different ways.

I think stress can surface in different forms...

Hectic stress when we feel we have to much to do.
Boredom stress when we feel we have too little to do.
Post traumatic stress when something really bad happens.
Emotional stress when we suffer emotional pain through hurt.

Whatever the form of stress, I think it can create the parrot in the cage syndrome as I call it.

When a parrot is in a cage, it feels trapped and it can get stressed so it turns in on itself by pulling its feathers out. We do much the same. When we feel stressed, we feel trapped which makes us anxious so we seem to look for something health related to worry about because we can't find an escape.

Of course, stress also produces anxiety symptoms such as palpitations, a funny tummy, shaking, weakness giddiness etc etc. All these symptoms then make us feel more stressed so we end up worrying even more about our health.

We often end up at the doctors asking for a "cure" so they give out meds but these often have side-effects such as nausea etc so we end up worrying even more about our health which then keeps the anxiety alive.

Even when we're reassured about one health worry, we'll often find another health worry to worry about because we're suffering too much underlying stress and of course, since we often doubt ourselves, we can't find reassurance within ourselves.

What I've found is if you can reduce stress and find more enjoyment in life, you feel happier in yourself so you worry less and feel less afraid and therefore you stop analysing your body and natural symptoms so much so you then stop worrying about health so much too.

Anyway, just some thoughts.:hugs:

[ihatediets]

Hi Bill,

I so totally agree with what you wrote. It is what most of us here are about and to accept the anxiety is to my opinion the first step to recovery. I do wonder tho, is there a way of ever being free from it? Or do we just learn to ignore the anxiety as we learn to recognise it?

Tami x

[cattia]

Thanks for this Bill, I love the parrot in the cage analogy. I sometimes wonder about the relationship between stress and anxiety. I feel personally that for me, anxiety actually can produce stress rather than the other way round. If I am very anxious, any little stress will be too much for me and make me feel very unstable and more anxious. If I am feeling mentally well balanced, I can cope with really quite a large amount of stress without becoming overly anxious, so I think for me it is all about somehow maintaining mental and emotional balance. I think that my anxiety really kicks in when I feel threatened, so when I have a lot of responsibility (which weirdly, can be the 'responsibility' of being happy and maintaining that state of happiness) then my anxiety will start up. For example, since I had my daughter, the happiness and enjoyent of being a mum also makes me feel threatened in a way because I am always aware of how scared I am of that being taken away from me, so that has meant my anxiety has actually been much worse since I had her.I have experienced this on a lesser scale with holidays, new jobs, anything that I really want, almost like I am bracing myself for disappointment, if that makes sense?

[Ella_Jayne]

Great post! :)

[Bill]

Tami:hugs:

is there a way of ever being free from it? Or do we just learn to ignore the anxiety as we learn to recognise it?

There are certainly ways to reduce it so that we can lead happier lives but attempting to be totally free of it would I feel be like saying can we ever be free of sneezing?

Anxiety is natural. It's just that it takes over our lives because we give it too much attention. Stress though certainly aggrovates it by making us focus on it more than we should.

For instance, if you open the front door and are confronted by a lion, the feelings you experience will be exactly the same as you feel in a stressful environment at work. The difference being we can run or fight a lion but we can't do either when we feel "trapped" in an office. This trapped feeling is what overstresses us into feeling anxious and inducing panics. However, it also means we start worrying more which triggers our worst fears so we focus on our health like a parrot pulling his feathers out in a cage.

If though we can find ways to reduce our stresses by easing our workloads, taking time out for respite, finding things to look forward to etc, we then also ease our worries because we feel more positive about living. Enjoying life means not worrying about it.

All health anxieties are really "health Worries". We look for things to worry about and our worst fear is our own health. If you can stop the worries, you stop feeling anxious. Too much stress is the fuel that keeps anxiety and worries, the fires, burning.

However, we are also very sensitive which also makes us worry. If we hear things on the News or read things in the papers who love to sensationalise anyway, the subjects we hear/read will often trigger us to worry. I've always found that we can't stop ourselves from worrying but we can train our minds away from worrying so that evry time a little worry starts to nag, don't dwell on it. Move your thoughts immediately onto something else, especially enjoyable things. Nipping it in the bud stop the worrying cycle in its tracks.

The more we sit and dwell on a worry, the more anxious we feel, the more stress we build up, the more the worry takes over.

Cattia:hugs:

since I had my daughter, the happiness and enjoyent of being a mum also makes me feel threatened in a way because I am always aware of how scared I am of that being taken away from me, so that has meant my anxiety has actually been much worse since I had her.

This is "responsibility" which triggers the fear of losing. The more we have, the more stress we feel because the more we feel we have to lose. This is what I was saying about different types of stresses. I think you would call this emotional stress as it's stress we create for ourselves internally and not due to a hectic daily ritual etc.

When this happens, I feel it's a case of learning that we can't control everything. We like to feel in control so we can keep ourselves, everything and everyone around us "safe" but life isn't like that. We need to learn a more relaxed approach to life because by attempting to keep in control, we're walking down a narrow safe path which creates tension because as you say, we're on the constant watch for threats. It means that every time we're forced off our safe path we become anxious because we feel we're losing control of keeping things and people "safe".

I think in some ways anxiety and stress are like a circle. Anxiety (worry, fear) produces stress but stress (such as in our daily jobs etc) can also produce anxiety. That's why there are different types of stresses and different worries. Too much stress at work could trigger worries but hearing something on the news could trigger a worry that will cause stress. Either way, the cycle begins unless we learn how to contain it or by nipping it in the bud.

Hope that helps a little.:hugs:

[blue moon]

A Wonderfull Wonderfull post Bill,we could use you at World Vision.
Petra x:yesyes:

[Bill]

Not sure about that Petra but if it's been of some help then it was worth posting it.:hugs:

[marie1974]

Hi Bill, great post, i find when my anxiety is bad, that i have to keep very busy all day, any quiet time i get, is too much thinking time, which leads to me feelin anxious and panicky, its awful and night times r the worst, but luckily i am busy alot so, it saves me from alot of worrry.

[Pandagirl]

Really great & informative post Bill. My HA has really kicked in since the death of my mother-in-law 3 weeks ago. You are right about occupying our minds. Had a great day with my son & friends on Tuesday & didn't have one stressful thought about my health. I am at home today packing for holiday & have just turned a cancer research advert over on the TV, how crazy is that! You are also right about the meds, they do work but the side effects make you worry more. Just hoping for more days where my parrot cage door is open :-) xx

[Bill]

I wrote the original post a few years ago but health anxiety seems to be such a common anxiety I thought I would bump this up in the hope it makes some sense and helps anyone as I know how it feels when anxiety makes us feel so low and frustrated.

[Blonde123]

Very true Bill. I'm a nurse and the worse thing I fear is dying but it is a natural part of life that no one can escape. However, my fear is how I die. I don't want any pain or long term suffering like I've seen many of my patients go through. Every little twitch or twinge makes me fear the worst and when I feel calm and rational, I know I'm being silly. In the moment though, the anxiety takes over and my mind races to conclusions which ordinarily wouldn't make sense. When this happens its a vicious circle because the physical symptoms of anxiety manifest as some sort of self perceived illness. Anxiety sucks!

[flipp]

What a wonderful post,my sister often spoke of your Beautiful posts.

Karina x.

[ServerError]

I've never been afraid of death, even during the worst of my anxiety. And I'm certainly not scared of being dead. Frankly, I could use the sleep!

What I fear is suffering. Whether it's pain or incapacity, I fear some sort of major reduction in my ability to function while alive. After that, I imagine death would be nothing in comparison.

In any case, I don't spend much time thinking about it. Life is good right now, and I'll take that.

[Thelegend27]

For me its not the fear of dying. I fear the unknown, meaning if i think about a health condition long enough ill start making myself think i may have it. Also i fear of dealing with a health condition, take cancer for example, thinking about getting cancer is tougher to think about than actually dying from it. Everyone dies some day, there's no exceptions, even the healthiest, wealthiest human will die eventually. You can't spend your time on earth fearing what you have no control over, you'd be fighting a losing battle. Death used to scare me, but after watching family members go peacefully i realized everyone had their time. Death may not be as bad as people think it is anyway, like i said, the deaths ive seen looked really peaceful.

[Bill]

Blonde123,
I just wanted to say how very much I admire nurses for all they do to help others.
Both my parents spent time in hospital and hospices and when I observed the nurses I felt there's no way I could ever do their jobs because I'd go home feeling too depressed every night. They told me they found it a pleasure but I would never have their ability to switch off.
I know you have your anxiety issues but I really wish I could take them away for you in return for all the care you give to others in need.
I will always have the highest regard and respect for people in your profession.

Karina,
Thank you So much for your message. Knowing your sister through her posts was such a great pleasure. I will always remember her with much fondness. She was such a lovely lady. :hugs:

[KristieHollins]

I've had a really crappy day today so I just wanted to say thank you for sharing these wise words...just what I needed :hugs:

[hbug2416]

Great post! Thanks for sharing! You've given me a lot to think about - and I mean that in a good way :)

[Blonde123]

Bill that's a lovely comment. I do think it is a privilege to care for people in their final hours and be a part of moment where your dignity respect and caring all comes together for that person. Fortunately my health anxieties have never stopped me from being able to care for others but it has made me dwell on certain illnesses that pre anxiety wouldn't have bothered me. However I have seen things I can never unsee and all I can do is make sure my patients don't suffer. Sometimes it's a sad world we live in, made worse by our fears and anxieties.