Managed to get 2 buses to work today!

[paulaf]

Today was my second day back at work after nearly a month off. I paid for a taxi yesterday but it was so expensive I was determined to get the bus today. I had a five minute walk to the first stop, waited a few minutes then took the bus about 20mins into town then got another one straight away which took another 25 mins or so, all in all took about 50 mins to get into work. I was absolutely terrified and felt like I needed to go to the toilet really bad before getting my second bus but I managed to get on the second bus and made it to work. By the time I got there I felt exhausted and I had just arrived! At least I managed it though, feeling the fear and doing it anyway! I just really need to pass my driving test as I can't keep having to go through this every day. Does anyone else feel weird about public transport and travelling far away from home / toilets?

[sharon35]

OMG!!! weldone! :D

[jellylegs]

Oh my gosh! I just sent you a message but i'm terrified of getting on the bus! Can't believe you spent all that time on one!! I can do 15 mins max! I walk as far as possible! Well done!! x

[gypsywomen]

well done:)

[JT69]

Hey Paulaf,

Well done you!!! See baby steps and then you go from strength to strength. Am pleased for you hun.:)

Jo.xx

[margaret jones]

Well done Paulef

I hate bus rides i can just manage a 10 min 1 from right outside my house i try and distract myself with looking for unusual things from the window and it seems to work try that .once again well done

Take Care Maggie xxxxxxxxxxx

[Clairalou]

Well done :) you should be really proud of yourself :) I suffer with anxiety when I'm away from home I'm not too bad with busses when I have my 2 little boys but when I'm on my own I'm a wreck!

Again well done

Love Claire xxxx

[AJS]

well done Paula - that's a huge step on your second day back at work!!!

I still haven't got on a bus since my first panic attack in October - i manage the train every day - but at least there is a toilet -not the most pleasant- but in an emergency at least it's there!

AJ x

[paulaf]

Thanks so much everyone, I totally do the whole 'planning where emergency toilets are' thing everywhere! I tried to distract myself by reading a metro newspaper and that helped a bit, I think the main motivation was thinking 'I'll be damned if I am gonna pay another fifteen quid just to get to work'! I will get to experience it all again on Monday...:ohmy:

[shore]

Well done ! Can't believe there are other people out there who when they go into different surroundings need to know where the toilet is! Thought it was just me - I sit in work constantly watching who is going to the loo just so I know there will be no one in there in case I need to go - drives me insane - at least I know I or we are not going mad. It's so good to talk to other people who are the same - friends are sympathetic but don't fully understand.

xx

[paulaf]

Shore I consider myself a toilet obsessive! always have been. If I'm in a place like my gp surgery where there is only one ladies toilet, and someone goes in I'm like 'omg hurry up and get out what if I need' (which makes me need)but if there was noone in there I wouldn't have to go, I'm like that anywhere with one toilet. At work if I have an upset stomach I will only go to a disabled toilet because I am paranoid about people hearing me. Some times in the past when I have been in a cubicle and someone has walked in I've literally held everything in until they leave. I am usually thinking 'hurry up, stop drying your damn hands and get out' lol

[shore]

omg - can't believe there are other people like me - I do the same thing at work in fact I actually had to laugh at myself the other week as I was in the toilet so long that the automatic lights went out and I couldn't even find the lock on the door - luckily I have a friend at work who I explained this too and that's why I could laugh at this in the end - albeit was really stressed at the time. Feels really good to speak to other people who are the same albeit I don't wish it upon anyone if that makes sense.

xx

[sheridan41]

Well done, those first steps are a big achievement. It seems that the on the bus/toilet is a big trigger for panic in a lot of people. So good for you! Good luck

[Micko]

are you on medication Paula?

[paulaf]

Lol shore, it is better to laugh at ourselves in these situations than cry! I know what you mean, I always thought I was the only freak on earth with my particular hang ups but it looks like I'm not, and likewise don't wish this on anyone but comforting to know I'm not alone.

Micko I am on 40mg fluoxetine daily and have been on all manner of different antidepressants over the past decade or so.

[jothenurse]

Great job! Whenever I have to go somewhere to work or out of town, I always have to take my own car. "Just in case" I want to leave or I have a panic attack.

[shore]

I just have so much comfort from reading other people's threads - I feel less of a loon and actually a weird sense of relief that I am actually feeling normal thoughts that other people feel the same.

[calm]

well done you..i have crohns disease.....so i definately know how you feel - once again, congratulations xxxx luv tracey xxxxx

[paulaf]

Thanks guys, I am learning to drive so just so want to pass my test (failed it first time but booked it again). It would be such a help for me to be able to take my own car, it would make such a difference to my life.