JB63
18-08-10, 17:55
Hi everyone
I have been reading posts on here for a week or so now and finally braved it to introduce myself. I have been a sufferer of depression, health anxiety, social anxiety, claustrophobia, panic atttacks .....the list goes on since I was a small child. It all stems from my painful childhood and has grown with me making my life a living nightmare most days. I have learnt how to hide my illnesses in some situations and learnt to adapt my life in some areas. If you met me on a good day (yes I do have them) you would never know how I suffer. Hiding myself away and pretending has led me to the dilema I am in now. I have brought up 3 beautiful well grounded children on my own as I can't hold a relationship down (would you want to be with someone carrying as much baggae as I do everyday) Anyway...it was decided that I have to start back into work Great stuff! I would love to be able to go to work, have a social life, earn my own money and live in the real world, but I tried that and ended up being put on the sick which was quickly changed over to Income support as I had a young child. New laws have changed it all around and now I have been switched back to Sickness benefit (ESA) I am waiting to be assessed. My Doctor put on my certificate migraine and vertigo which I do suffer with on a very regular basis but this is all connected to my mental state. My Doctor is very aware that I suffer with my phobias and anxieties but this hasn't been put on my certificate. I am so scared that I will be forced into work when I can barely leave the house most days, I can't use any form of public transport, I can't visit buildings if I don't know the lay out and where the exits are, I can't enter buildings with automatic doors , Oh My I am so very limited . How will I manage if I don't get past the assessment phase of my claim?
PHEW!!! needed to get that off my chest, I haven't slept longer than 2 hours per evening in just over a week, I can't eat, I am a wreck and for the first time it is affecting my Youngest child. He is 16 so not a baby but although he knows how I suffer, he has rarely seen me in meltdown. I can't stand this. I have a fear of ALL medication and have been prescribed them all over the years, I am working up the confidence to take the citalopram I have just been given after freaking out from beta blockers. I know I have to go through this and it will all be over one day but the stress of form filling and waiting for a result is putting me out of action big time! Thank you for reading. Here seemed like a good place to start as I see many people with signs and symptoms and suffering the same as mine. It is good to know we are not alone.
I have been reading posts on here for a week or so now and finally braved it to introduce myself. I have been a sufferer of depression, health anxiety, social anxiety, claustrophobia, panic atttacks .....the list goes on since I was a small child. It all stems from my painful childhood and has grown with me making my life a living nightmare most days. I have learnt how to hide my illnesses in some situations and learnt to adapt my life in some areas. If you met me on a good day (yes I do have them) you would never know how I suffer. Hiding myself away and pretending has led me to the dilema I am in now. I have brought up 3 beautiful well grounded children on my own as I can't hold a relationship down (would you want to be with someone carrying as much baggae as I do everyday) Anyway...it was decided that I have to start back into work Great stuff! I would love to be able to go to work, have a social life, earn my own money and live in the real world, but I tried that and ended up being put on the sick which was quickly changed over to Income support as I had a young child. New laws have changed it all around and now I have been switched back to Sickness benefit (ESA) I am waiting to be assessed. My Doctor put on my certificate migraine and vertigo which I do suffer with on a very regular basis but this is all connected to my mental state. My Doctor is very aware that I suffer with my phobias and anxieties but this hasn't been put on my certificate. I am so scared that I will be forced into work when I can barely leave the house most days, I can't use any form of public transport, I can't visit buildings if I don't know the lay out and where the exits are, I can't enter buildings with automatic doors , Oh My I am so very limited . How will I manage if I don't get past the assessment phase of my claim?
PHEW!!! needed to get that off my chest, I haven't slept longer than 2 hours per evening in just over a week, I can't eat, I am a wreck and for the first time it is affecting my Youngest child. He is 16 so not a baby but although he knows how I suffer, he has rarely seen me in meltdown. I can't stand this. I have a fear of ALL medication and have been prescribed them all over the years, I am working up the confidence to take the citalopram I have just been given after freaking out from beta blockers. I know I have to go through this and it will all be over one day but the stress of form filling and waiting for a result is putting me out of action big time! Thank you for reading. Here seemed like a good place to start as I see many people with signs and symptoms and suffering the same as mine. It is good to know we are not alone.