let down again by our systems now thinking why do i bother

[mcclan]

im paying the price for something that was done to me. thats why i know why should i lived through what happened to me :mad:

[gypsywomen]

dont understand

[Lynnann]

Hi Dave,

Life isn't fair, I pay the price for things that were done to me, you are not alone in that, most PTSD sufferers are in a similar situation. You seem to be having a bad day today and for that I am sorry. Are you seeing the doctor tomorrow again?

Things will improve in time, you had some good days in the last week I read your posts and was glad to see it. Try to concentrate on the good things and the good days. However small they may be and however fleeting that day may be.

By doing this you will have more happy and contented moments and more good days that follow them. What you went through was horrific and it takes time and a lot of effort to get over it but I believe you can do it.
You bother because you want to get better I know it is hard and I know it is discouraging at times but you will get there.

Thinking of you

Lynnann:flowers:

[mcclan]

thanks but this has knocked me back to the start but with no help from our systems as they say cant deal with it anymore because no one will speak up for what happened to me so hes still there and now im stuck in here forever. like to say thanks for your support but think its time for not to be around anymore as i cant go out anywhere ever again many thanks tho and hope who ever else is in this situation they can get the help

[nomorepanic]

I thought you were getting help - you said you were in your last post?

Don't let the bullies win - stand up to them. You have a life to live so why should they rule it?

[Lynnann]

Hi Dave,

I understand your frustration, I really do, there were many years where I never left the house unaccompanied, to be honest I still don't very often.
I am still a work in progress.

Can you move? is that a possibility? if you are in the vicinity of your attacker it must be impossible for you to move forward. I can at least think mine are hundreds of miles away I really don't think I could cope with them being nearby.

I am here if you want to talk, pm me or whatever ok

Lynnann:flowers:

[Chem]

mcclan I too suffer from PTSD. I did nothing to provoke the attack I suffered. There is help out there, but it can take time on waiting lists to get it.

Do you keep a diary? It helps to write down even small good things about each day. As you look back you can see that they didn't take away your happiness completely and you can start to rebuild.

[mcclan]

hi chem yeh iv been seeing so many people for 3 and half years now. i do have a new i got see next wednesday. yes i do have to keep a diary for day to day feelings so they can analyse it to see what they can do next for me. to me tho it seems like it will never end. some days iv felt like i shuold not be in this world anymore because of it all.

[StoneMonkey]

Hi Mcclan,
I was attacked a long time ago (nearly 30 years) and as a young man the world changed for me on that day.
It was very public and nobody stepped in. There were security guards around and they didn't step in. I lost some confidence in the world, myself and people that day.
I got a bit stuck on the whys afterwards. For me it was why would someone want to hurt somebody else. Why me? It took me a while to realise that if it wasn't me that day it was going to be someone else.

There are people out there that base their selfworth on being able to take somebody elses by violence. For others it is little more than for kicks.
My attackers suffered no consequences, nobody was interested and that is unfortunately the same for many types of injustice that happen. Mine was random violence by unknowns so I dont how much harder it is knowing that they are still around you.

I have never spoken about this before and cant honestly say how much it has affected who I am today and I cant really offer you anything other than
someone else has come out the other side of something similar.

Simon.

[mcclan]

hi siram. not sure what to say about what happened as every time i speak about it i get more angry with how it was dealt with and the ones that was there that day that changed my life. my own family are to scared to speak to me now incase i lose it. even tho im seeing so many people all the time as soon as there gone iv got my barriers up again.

[JaneC]

Can't offer much Dave, but just a thought - have you ever spoken to victim support?

[StoneMonkey]

Hey Mcclan,
No need to say anything about what happened. Its tough on family. They want to help the most and are often scared of saying the wrong thing. Those barriers might be quite usefull later on if they start working for you.
Simon.

[Chem]

mcclan I also find that the hardest thing to deal with is the anger at the injustice of what happened to me. I'm powerless to change it and have no-one to release the anger on. I hope your new therapist can help you to deal with this.