New Member

[vicki1001]

Hi everyone,

My name is Vicki, i'm 34 & I am new to this forum having found it in my relentless internet search for help for my anxiety.

I just wanted to say what a relief it is to find a place where there are people who suffer all the same problems/symptoms as me. I have felt very alone with my problems as i find it really embarassing to talk to anyone about my anixety for the fear that people will think i am a little loopy. Even going to the doctor makes me feel like an idiot as i go there really knowing that there is nothing wrong with me other than worry- but still i go! Luckily my doctor is really kind and understands completely that sometimes i just need reassurance and someone to talk to.

I have suffered with anxiety over my health and life in general for about 6 years now on and off and often get very bad physical symptoms that freak me out and make me sure that i am going to die. Although i can go for months feeling great the minute i get any stress in my life it starts again.

At the moment i am suffering very badly due to the breakdown of a long term relationship that i messed up with all my worry. I now have horrible chest and back pains, am having difficultly beathing because i panic over the pains and i have generally convinced myself that i have cancer. I notice that a lot of you here worry over your hearts but for me the pains just mean cancer and a horrible death.

Even though i can control my emotions over the health fears to a certain extent i find it harder to control the anxiety over my future. Having lost a person that was very special to me because i was constantly worrying about the relationship going bad i am frightened that i will do this with every guy i meet and they will all leave and i will be alone. Of course all this ridiculous worrying makes every muscle in my body tense and then the health anxiety starts. What a dammed vicious cirlce this anxiety is!!

Anyway, sorry to go on and on [Oops!] but i guess if i can put down all my problems anywhere it is here :)

This is a great forum and has been a great comfort to me already so thanks everyone for that. I'm already feeling a lot more relaxed after reading a few posts and seeing that i am not 1) alone and 2) crazy.

Thanks guys!![:X]

Vickixxx

[Alexandra]

Hi Vicki

Welcome to the forum.

You will find plenty of support & people in the same boat as yourself.

Take Care

Alex

Many People Will Walk
In & Out Of Your Life
But Only True Friends
Will Leave Footprints
In Your Heart

[nomorepanic]

Vicki

A warm welcome aboard and I hope we can be of some help to you on here.

Nicola

[vicki1001]

Hi Alex & Nicola,

Thank you both for your welcome messages

Vicki :D

[Karen]

Hi Vicki

Welcome to the forum.

You might find the following information helpful:

First Steps (http://www.nomorepanic.co.uk/default.asp?t=cms&c=firststeps)

Symptoms (http://www.nomorepanic.co.uk/default.asp?t=cms&c=symptoms)

Health Anxiety (http://www.nomorepanic.co.uk/default.asp?t=cms&c=healthanxiety)

You will find a lot of help and support here.


Karen



Happiness is not a state to arrive at but a manner of travelling.

You only live once, but if you do it right, once is enough ~ Christine Cagney, Cagney & Lacey

[Piglet]

A big welcome to you :D

Piglet xx

"Supposing a tree fell down, Pooh, when we were underneath it?" said Piglet.
"Supposing it didn't," said Pooh after careful thought.

[Robertc160882]

Hi Vicki,

Welcome to the forum, i only find this forum a few days ago and it has helped me already.

Robert

[trac67]

Hi Vicki,

Welcome to the forum, you will get a lot of good advice here and make some new friends.

Take care

Trac xx

'Live your life with arms wide open, today is where your book begins, the rest is still unwritten'

[vicki1001]

Hi Piglet and Karen,

Thanks to you two as well for the welcome!
Karen, thanks for the information links - reading the list of symptoms was like reading my doctors history - i have experienced them all at sometime!

It's funny reading them because it makes me realise that i although i do have real physical symptoms they are not life threatening and i laugh at myself for imagining they are. But no doubt by tomorrow they will be a sure sign of impending doom! Such is life [Sigh...]

Well, this evening will be a relaxed & good one i think because of this site and your kind replies

Thanks a lot
Vickixx

[vicki1001]

Hi Trac & Robert too!

Nice to hear from you:D

Vickixx

[floatlikeabutterfly]

Vicki

If it helps you at all I thought I was going mad too.

The ONLY things that held my attention for any length of time when I was at my worst were fags, arrow word puzzles (odd since I never did that before or since) and my preoccupation with trying to get the doctors to check me into a mental hospital.

It was only when I got as far as the Mental Health Team they said 'you know that a mental hospital isn't a hospital in the countryside with blue rinse old ladies having a bit of quiet time' that my quest came to an end.

I hadn't considered what it was only that i thought I had lost it and more importantly they would give me a chemical cosh and I could get some sleep.

[Karen]

Hi Vicki

Glad it helped.


<b id="quote">quote:</b id="quote"><table border="0" id="quote"><tr id="quote"><td class="quote" id="quote">It's funny reading them because it makes me realise that i although i do have real physical symptoms they are not life threatening and i laugh at myself for imagining they are. But no doubt by tomorrow they will be a sure sign of impending doom! Such is life [Sigh...]
<div align="right">Originally posted by vicki1001 - 26 February 2006 : 19:41:19</div id="right">
</td id="quote"></tr id="quote"></table id="quote">
Perhaps you could print the information and then whenever you are starting to doubt that the symptoms are anything other than anxiety you could look at the list. This could help you start to challenge your thoughts.

Pleased you are feeling calmer this evening.

Karen



Happiness is not a state to arrive at but a manner of travelling.

You only live once, but if you do it right, once is enough ~ Christine Cagney, Cagney & Lacey

[Lozzie]

Hi Vicki,

Welcome to the forums x
You will find alot of useful information on this site and make new friends too [^]

Laurax

[clickaway]

Hi Vicki,

A warm welcome to you.

I'm sorry your relationship has broken up as a result of the anxiety. This is not your fault, rather a consequence of your disorder which he could not deal with, so please don't feel guilty in that way.

There are others here have suffered similarly, and we are all here to support each other.

Take Care,


Ray
http://www.anxietyrelease.org.uk/

And when you get the choice to sit it out or dance, I hope you dance.
~Mark Sanders and Tia Sillers

[vicki1001]

Hi floatlikeabutterfly :D for me it's fags and suduko! - seriously addicted to both. fags not really a good idea as they start the cancer anxiety (must give up soon!) but the suduko helps as i end up completely absorbed by it. I can recommend it for whiling away the small hours when sleep won't come.

Hi Ray & Laura too [:P][:P]

Ray, i know you are right in a way that the breakdown of my relationship was not nessecarily all about my anxiety. Sometimes i think maybe he was a big cause of my anxiety as he wasn't very supportive/understanding and often told me i was mad - not very helpful! i know really that a man like that would never make me happy long term so even though it's seriously difficult to deal with now it will be the best thing in the long run. With love comes understanding and kindness and if i can't get that i am probably better off on my own. And who knows who's round the corner!

Thanks all of you for being so kind and welcoming me into the forums - phew what a relief, was dead nervous when i did my post!

Vickixxx

[floatlikeabutterfly]

Hi floatlikeabutterfly for me it's fags and suduko! - seriously addicted to both. fags not really a good idea as they start the cancer anxiety (must give up soon!) but the suduko helps as i end up completely absorbed by it. I can recommend it for whiling away the small hours when sleep won't come.

:D Whatever floats yer boat. :-)

I am pleased to report I have now managed to kick the Arrow Word Habit. In fact I haven't done an Arrow Word for over 2 years.

Go on, clap me. You know I deserve it.






Still working on the fags. Ahem ;)

[sal]

Hi Vicki so pleased you have found the site. We are all here for you and understand how you feel. Will help you all i can.

Love Sal xx


Dont mess up the best things in your life, just because at present you are unsure who you are.


"Life is a distance and to travel that distance you were given the strength and guidance to do so".

[vicki1001]

Hi Sal,

I'm pleased i found this site too!
Have had a really relaxed evening tonight, the first in ages, due to finding this site and realising i'm not alone now. Hope i can keep up the positive feeling i ahve now.

Thanks for your message.

take care
Vickixx

[Sue K with 5]

Hi Vicki


Welcome to NMP! you have certainly come to the right place. I too have health Anxieties which have been a part of my life for a long time now. Well Tomorrow I am giving up smoking so I am hoping it will help reduce the worry although knowing me I will just find something else to worry about.

Glad you have found us and keep posting you will find so much support on here


Sue with 5

scknight

[lildutt]

hi vicki and welcome
hope you will get all the support you need
bellxx

[wendy]

Hi Vicki
Welcome to the site
Sorry to hear you not feeling too good, Hope the site helps you as much as it is me in getting better
Wendy x

[wobily_lin]

Hi Vicki,

Welcome to the site,

Take care.

Lin,
xxx

[Meg]

Hello Vicki

Correct - you are not crazy- just anxious

I can understand your feras about future and the uncertainty of it all. Are you takling steps to build yourself a new future where you can have the vision of what you are aiming for ...



Meg
www.anxietymanagementltd.com

Your anxiety is the human representation of the pictures that you paint using your many vivid colours of revolving and reoccurring thoughts.
How big is your gallery ?

[keepemlaughing]

And a warm welcome from me, too.
Sheryl

[kellie]

Hiya :welcome: to NMP its lovely to have you here

[Lindalou64]

Hello Vicki And Welcome To The Site , I Wish Ya Well, Linda