notsogood99
11-09-10, 18:08
Just joined up today, it has really helped reading others stories.
I have suffered with depression on and off for the last 14 yrs. Problems stem from 2 alcoholic parents. I have always been open about my problems and spoken with my GP.
Had really bad periods after a marriage break up, dad dying, post natal.
This time it has been triggered by my mum being diagnosed with lung cancer, at the same time my boyfriend split up with me.
I was really gutted when my man dumped me, it had been nearly a year, we were happy, he loved my 3 kids to bits and one day out of the blue he just said he didn't love me anymore and that he couldn't see a future with me and the kids. There was no way he could be a stepdad to my 3, it was just too much!
I spent the next 4 weeks an absolute mess. I was so upset by him and what he'd done. I couldn't work it out, i felt so useless!
Then out of the blue he got in touch with me and said he'd made a mistake, and the time we'd had apart made him realise that he did love me and the kids. He wanted me back. I held back for a few days and told him my concerns and that I didn't know whether i could trust him.
I eventually came round and we're back together. :)
Only thing is now I am obsessing he is going to end it again! It has been 5 weeks since we got back together, these feelings have been here for last 2 weeks! He hasn't done anything to make me think he is going to end it. I need constant reassurance from him! I know it will drive him mad eventually! I think if i was feelig myself i wouldn't be thinking like this. I am so paranoid, if he doesn't answer his phone straight away i'm convinced it's over!!
It was a bit of a delayed reaction with my mum, I hadn't seen her for 2 yrs as her drinking got too much and she caused the family so many problems. Anyway I was told she was sick and she'd stopped drinking, went to see her and honestly felt nothing. I didn't see her for a month or so and when i popped into see her she looked so ill it knocked me for 6.
So I guess a combination of these 2 things have started it all over again!
This time seems worse though. On top of feeling depressed, I am waking up with the fear of god in me. My heart feels like it is gonna pop out of my chest, I am constantly worried!
Was on trazadone 300mg a day. They made me feel so very tired. I asked doc to change them. So he reduced me, then this week put me on duloxetine.
So, glad got that off my chest..... did anyone make it to the end???
I have suffered with depression on and off for the last 14 yrs. Problems stem from 2 alcoholic parents. I have always been open about my problems and spoken with my GP.
Had really bad periods after a marriage break up, dad dying, post natal.
This time it has been triggered by my mum being diagnosed with lung cancer, at the same time my boyfriend split up with me.
I was really gutted when my man dumped me, it had been nearly a year, we were happy, he loved my 3 kids to bits and one day out of the blue he just said he didn't love me anymore and that he couldn't see a future with me and the kids. There was no way he could be a stepdad to my 3, it was just too much!
I spent the next 4 weeks an absolute mess. I was so upset by him and what he'd done. I couldn't work it out, i felt so useless!
Then out of the blue he got in touch with me and said he'd made a mistake, and the time we'd had apart made him realise that he did love me and the kids. He wanted me back. I held back for a few days and told him my concerns and that I didn't know whether i could trust him.
I eventually came round and we're back together. :)
Only thing is now I am obsessing he is going to end it again! It has been 5 weeks since we got back together, these feelings have been here for last 2 weeks! He hasn't done anything to make me think he is going to end it. I need constant reassurance from him! I know it will drive him mad eventually! I think if i was feelig myself i wouldn't be thinking like this. I am so paranoid, if he doesn't answer his phone straight away i'm convinced it's over!!
It was a bit of a delayed reaction with my mum, I hadn't seen her for 2 yrs as her drinking got too much and she caused the family so many problems. Anyway I was told she was sick and she'd stopped drinking, went to see her and honestly felt nothing. I didn't see her for a month or so and when i popped into see her she looked so ill it knocked me for 6.
So I guess a combination of these 2 things have started it all over again!
This time seems worse though. On top of feeling depressed, I am waking up with the fear of god in me. My heart feels like it is gonna pop out of my chest, I am constantly worried!
Was on trazadone 300mg a day. They made me feel so very tired. I asked doc to change them. So he reduced me, then this week put me on duloxetine.
So, glad got that off my chest..... did anyone make it to the end???