View Full Version : Anxiety is normal
Hi Guys,
Reading through some posts I have often wanted to say this, but I thought i would write one posts rather than repeat myself.
People often talk about being able to stop anxiety, or depression etc, the fact is, you can never stop it, nor would you want to, it is part of being a human.
Anxiety, fear, even depression are normal human emotions, on the other end of the scale from joy, happiness, excitement etc. They serve a purpose, like all our emotions they have evolutionised over centuries to help us survive.
Depression and mourning for example are a natural part of the healing process of dealing with upsets, from loosing a loved one, splitting up with a partner, loosing a job or any number of upsetting things, it is normal to feel depressed and or sad for a time.
Anxiety is really part of the fight or flight mechanism, back when we were cave men it was designed to help you run away or fight a threat like an attack from a predator. It was fundamental to our survival, as with any animal, they are alert to threat.
The problem occurs when you get stuck in any of these emotions for a long period of time. That is not healthy and it needs some action from you to heal.
If you are worried about an exam, new job, money problems or any number of challenges it is completely normal and acceptable to feel anxiety, stress and even fear. If however it has gone on for months, or even years, then it is not healthy.
We are not designed to be under constant fear, anxiety, panic and alert or indeed depressed. Its emotionally and mentally unpleasant and actually puts stress on your body too, it is exhausting and you don't need to suffer it in silence, there is help for you.
No one likes labels like 'disorders' etc, but if you have had severe depression or anxiety for any length of time, you are experiencing some sort of emotional and mental condition, which needs treatment.
There are many forms of treatment that you can find, from holistic, therapy through to pharmaceutical or a combination of the above.
If you're unsure of whether your anxiety or depression is at a level that needs some support, there are lots of tests online. These are not conclusive, but they do help indicate where you are:
http://www.gm.tv/lifestyle/health/health-tests-and-quizzes/34165-anxiety-test.html
http://www.gm.tv/lifestyle/health/health-tests-and-quizzes/28639-dr-hilary-instant-depression-test.html
If you score high in these, I would advice that you seek out help, starting with your GP and then looking at other kinds of help that are available to you. There is a wealth of information and support on this website to help you choose what is right for you.
If you have already done this and are on the healing process like me, well done. But just rememnber blips, anxious days and depressed days might well be normal human reactions to the things going on in your life.
Part of healing is to learn to love yourself, worts and all. And that means loving the anxious depressed parts too, not wishing they didn't exist. You need them, they serve a purpose, you just don't want them to hog all the limelight and let some of the other emotions get a look in.
However awful you feel, you like all humans are perfectly capable to heal yourself and get better, it may take some time and some commitment, but you're worth it. ;)
evil monkey
27-09-10, 21:38
agree with what you said, if i can reply to part of it with some of my experiences. all of what you posted with this additionally
for some research ive done, i think that anxiety and depression are two different things. here's theories
depression is actual chemicals, which is where i think the anti-d's come in, to rebalance, and probably works in terms of weeks
anxiety i think is caused by cortisol and/or adrenaline released (by the pituitory gland?), and works in terms of seconds or minutes
glad you said about fight or flight. when the body gets stressed, it basically thinks there's a lion after it, which releases adrenaline/cortisol (cortisol is one of the things that wakes you up in the morning?), which basically makes you act 'fast' for a second. but if there's no physical threat, the adrenaline is still there.
Hmmm.....well in the end trooper your post is quite positive which is great, but I find the title of your post a bit conflicting with the ideas in the post itself. To be honest when I read your posts title 'anxiety is normal' my first thought was, well actually, no it isn't at the levels that many people are suffering with it here.
I know what you are saying - as you eventually say in your post - that anxiety at reasonable levels and with something valid to be anxious about is normal, but normal anxiety is not what we are talking about here, that is why we are all struggling with it as it is inflicting on daily life for most of us.
You also say 'no one would want to stop depression/anxiety'!!!!!
Umm......is that a serious comment? I for one when I was depressed SERIOUSLY AND DESPERATELY wanted to get rid of it. It is an absolute living nightmare and I wouldn't wish it on my worst enemy, let alone learn to live with it. To say you can 'never stop it' frankly is claptrap. I find that a broadsweeping statement to make and a little discouraging. The same with anxiety. I would rather break both legs than suffer it frankly.
In the end I couldn't honestly decide what point you were making really.
i have to say i really agree with Debs here. when i read the post i almost felt like you were saying that what im going through is normal, and that it will never go away, which quite frankly is quite hurtful because the way i've been feeling recently is not at all normal, it's excruciating. i think it's quite obvious that a certain amount of anxiety/sadness is normal for a human, as is the fight or flight response in appropriate circumstances, but living with it on a daily basis and having no tangible trigger is extremely distressing.
i appreciate the advice you're giving and the fact that you're trying to be positive and helpful, but please be mindful that anxiety and depression is an extremely sensitive subject and something that is a daily struggle, not something that is "normal" and run of the mill. people may be upset by you saying this.
The point is that all the emotions are natural, if for example you step out in front of a car then if you couldn't feel anxiety or fear, you'd just carry on wondering out and get knocked over. You cannot irradicate your emotional circirity and you wouldn't want to, its there for a reason.
But to suffer from it all the time is not and that is what needs treatment.
I guess what I was trying to say was that some people feel that any kind of sense of anxiety and depression is a relapse, when it could be a normal reaction to a normal thing.
I guess perhaps I could have preframed my points, looking at it from a point of view of recovery.
I can see why it could be seen in a negative way if you're bogged down in it.
Veronica H
28-09-10, 09:15
:yesyes:thanks Trooper. I agree with what you say because I am pretty much recovered these days. When I arrived at this site over 2yrs ago though, I thought my life was over and that this 'thing' was so powerful that there was no point fighting it. It is difficult to imagine such a recovery when our nerves are so sensitised. For those who have just arrived at the site I want to reassure you that this can and will get better. Take small steps each day while your nerves recover, and try not to add fear to the mix as this keeps the cycle going.:bighug1:
Veronicax
I think there are natural responses to danger, which make a lot of sense. However, anxiety and panic are generally distorted responses, and as such tend to be overreactions.
There is a difference between the two, in that the former makes sense in terms of self-protection, whereas the latter doesn't make sense in terms of blowing real threats out of all proportion.
Having said that, I do agree with the opening post, in that I believe the worst suffering appears as a result of non-acceptance. I've been there myself, and I've encountered so many people who are fighting their symptoms and trying to pull themselves together in order to appear 'normal', they are making their condition much, much worse by desperately wanting it to disappear and not accepting it. It's like a fish on a hook that wriggles and wriggles in an attempt to come loose, thus only driving the hook in deeper and deeper....
It's easier said than done, I know, but the answer would be to come to some kind of acceptance of the condition, learning to feel and go with the horrible feelings involved, as opposed to simply wanting to be rid of them, and thus giving oneself the chance to realise that the monster one is running away from actually doesn't have any teeth, and that the worst will not happen.
depression is actual chemicals, which is where i think the anti-d's come in, to rebalance.
There is so far no scientific evidence for the "chemical imbalance" myth whatsoever, and it's probably not surprising that this whole story emanated from the research laboratories of all kinds of pharmaceutical companies, who are making a lot of money selling these kind of pills.
Anti-depressants, and medication in general are a billion dollar business, after all - which begs the question in who's interest it might be most. I think it is important to bear this in mind!
The chemicals that are often mentioned in regard to things such as depression are neurotransmitters. The human nervous system is electro-chemical in nature and what starts as an electrical signal passing down our nerve has to become a chemical to travel across the synaptic-gap where nerves join.
The chemicals taken to address the 'depressed' state are to counter the levels measured in this situation and unfortunately do not go to the root of the problem ..... i.e. the mental processes that someone is going through to create the electrical signal that is sent down the nerve in the first place.
By dealing with the mental aspects, we can physically change chemicals that are produced - at cause - rather than trying to balance them after the effect.
It all comes down to the mind-body / body-mind and there are a number of different views held on which is true. Which controls which. As time passes though, the ties between the two appear to be getting more closely linked.
A good book on this subject is Quantum Healing by Deepak Chopra.
Anxiety is an emotion based in time - in that it is a fear of the future. Something happened in the past, which created fear, then we become fearful of something like it happening again - which creates a fear of a future event/outcome.
It is a signal to us to realise that we are not focussing on what we want - and rather we are focussing on the outcome being negative and/or detrimental to us.
Anxiety is normal in regard to the fact that it is a natural emotion, much like any other human emotion - though it is not beneficial to us and can be counter productive, rather than allowing a healthy fight-or-flight response ... it can prevent people doing the very thing they need to do, from taking the relevant action.
I recommend you read this website on Time Line Therapy: [by the originator, Tad James]
http://www.timelinetherapy.net/
It explains a lot about negative emotions and how they can affect us. Also, what can be done to deal with them.
i was quite aware that anxiety and panic are normal human emotions, it's not like i had never experienced them in my life before i began suffering with anxiety and panic. i understand what ur saying trooper in that we wouldnt want these emotions or sensations to disappear from our lives altogether, that would make us numb to the world around us. i guess i felt hurt by what u said because the way i feel now is not something im experiencing as a response to a lion chasing me, it has struck me down and i dont know how to make it go away. i have no reason to be anxious afraid every moment of the day, yet i feel sick with anxiety for the majotity of the day, with no tangible stimuli. that's the difficult part. by no means do i dwell on it, i stil get up n go 2 work everyday n try to carry on as normal. and i have accepted that this is happening to me. im really pleased for u guys who can look back and say u beat it, and i hope to one day be where you are, but i think u have to ackowledge that it isnt easy to control it or beat it, it takes time.
Sarah - the thing that is happening to you, is fairly common (as evidenced by this site).
So, whilst there are no 'tangible' stimuli - the fact remains that the stimuli are there regardless and are held within the unconscious part of your mind. By that, all I mean is that it is within the part of your brain functioning that is outside of your conscious awareness. If you were aware of the issue creating the anxiety then you would likely have already had it dealt with......
The fact is that problem behaviours such as this usually are held at the unconscious level - this is why you need to deal with it at that level to experience the problem going.
All human behaviour has a higher positive intention for the individual. In that even a seemingly negative behaviour is achieving some benefit for you - even if you are not aware consciously of what that benefit is. The anxiety you are dealing with, for example, may be your brain's way of protecting you from a perceived threat, in an external situation - so preventing you doing the thing it perceives as a threat.
So, as you see in that example - the negative behaviour is TRYING to achieve a higher level positive outcome for you.
The problem is, that sometimes our mechanisms get it wrong and keep trying to protect us from a perceived threat that no longer exists, or that we have created a belief internally that leads us to undertake problem coping strategies.
There are ways to deal with the emotional responses, both in regard to the past fear and the future based anxiety.
Some say that time is a great healer - I believe it is more to do with what you DO in that time, that makes the difference...... doing the right thing, will enable you to move beyond that old problem, now.
well i hope im doing the right things. seeing a therapist, trying to change my lifestyle but cutting out alcoholl caffeine and late nights where possible. seeing my GP regularly. it seems to work but every now and again i will have a set back, but as i understand it that is quite common. i didnt mean to sound like i disagreed with what was said at the beginning of this thread. i am a healthcare professional myself and have a degree of experience within mental health so i am quite well informed really. funnily enough though it all seems to go out the window, whatever you know and however rational you are when your life is turned upside down by something you thought would never be a problem for you. everything you say makes sense though.
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