View Full Version : Scared of people?
I've had a few great days now I'm on sertraline but last night and now I feel terrible again.
Basically I feel scared of the world and how big it is and how small we are, scared of people because they can be so uncontrollable and random and as if everyone around me is a stranger. Even my family and loved ones. I look at everyone asking myself why do people do what they do, why are we here etc.
Then I start questioning why words are words and what is the world all about and now I keep having anxiety attacks. I have diazepam too but afraid to take them in case they don't work.
Feel like I'm falling apart big time!
Is this anxiety? Can anyone relate?
Hi David
This is definitely anxiety, and you're probably feeling depersonalisation as well, which is what is making close people feel like strangers.
What tends to happen when you start taking medication is that you get a mix of good and bad days. You'll feel OK for a while, then another bad day pops up. The diazepam will definitely work if you really feel you need to take them, but they might make you feel a bit spaced-out, which you might not like.
I've been on sertraline 11 days now and really thought they had kicked in but obviously not quite yet.
I hate this feeling of fear over irrational things and especially now with this new symptom of fearing friends, family and people. As soon as a little thought pops in my head I fear it and I don't want to fear it.
It's so terrifying and crippling it makes you not want to live.
Really need to get some more response to this as it's freaking me out
Hi David,
Sorry to hear that you're feeling so bad. Anxiety can play cruel tricks on us and it can be overwhelming. I know that I when I feel bad it's hard to stop the spriral out of control.
Try to keep your mind occupied by reading or watching a film / tv etc. I know that might sound lame but it might allow you some a break & therefore some relief from your anxiety.
There's plenty of stories on this forum aswell so you might find some comfort from other peoples stories with regards to what you're going through.
Have you got someone that you can talk to about how you're feeling?
Take care
Kel
x
My gf is very supportive but it's hard when my anxious brain thinks shes a stranger.
It's really hard to deal with.
Anymore support or is this a weird one?
Still no replies? I find myself attaching fear to anything
I use to feel the same but without being n meds, are yo able to think back to before the time when these things didn't scare you? That may help in how your feeling now may help set your mind at ease and have it believe which is the truth that you've been and seen ppl and strangers before even ppp you know and you were fine, so maybe think to yourself that nothing has changed from then to now, that's how I over came fear/shyness And thought ppl are just like me, they may not have the same characteristics as myself but they eat sleep and breath just as I do and have there own fears as well, most of all they are just as human as I
best wishes, I've been there and you will overcome it
Hi again
I see you're offline now, but the best temporary way to deal with these sorts of feelings is to do something that occupies your mind, or get some exercise as the endorphins you produce helps block things out. When things go round and round in our heads, it's often known as rumination (like the way cows chew the same bit of grass for hours). Anxiety makes us do that in our heads and the only way out of that trap is to do something that makes your mind think of something else.
Hi David
Your post is so exactly spot on how I have felt in the past 2 years and still do to an extent. A lot of the other posts have given good advice.
I have only been like it since I had a breakdown and had all the anxiety and the rest. I cannot remember feeling like it before all that,
Taking citalopram has helped a lot to ease the feelings, but I can still feel sometimes like I am on the wrong planet and in the wrong time at times, as mad and odd as it sounds. If I see a person I have to analyse them in a way, by thinking what do they do, what are they like, to why are we all here! Do you feel overwhelmed by how big the world is and then see yourself as being small, like we are all ants? I get that a lot.
I have read quite a bit about it on the internet and there are some good posts on this site, about people feeling similar things.
I think it is all due to anxiety personally and how it affects our brains/way of thinking and seeing things - like derealisation and depersonalisation. Hopefully as your anxiety fades then so will the way you see other people.
I used to feel like I was the only one feeling that way and/or that I was going mad. Please be reassured that you are not alone in how you feel.:hugs:
Thanks for the replies thus far guys.
Today I just feel like I'm having a losing battle. It feels like I'm not properly part of this world, like I can't think straight and suicidal fears keep popping in to my head. I feel lost and like I'm having real trouble coping. I don't want to have to fight this forever. I just want to get on with my life.
It's making me feel awful and I sweat so much. Does anyone else sweat?
I hate it I hate it!!!!
Hi David,
Sorry that you're having a really bad day. Some days can be alot worse than others but that doesn't mean that you will feel like this tomorrow. There are bound to be ups & downs along the way. Try not to lose hope.
If you're feeling that bad then maybe you need to go back to the doctors.
I can relate to the sweating! It's a perfectly normal symptom of anxiety & is nothing to worry about. Try to keep cool where you can as your worry about feeling hot might be escalating things.
Anxiety is a terrible thing & I completely sympathise.
Things that help me are:
trying to keep busy (reading, walking, watching tv)
writing a journal each day (a general summary of how the day has gone & then highlighting the positives (an example of which for me would be that I hadn't been sick or had managed to eat something). I then follow this with some self talk - reminding myself that this is a temporary glitch & that things will get better
trying to relax: I know this is easier said than done & when I'm at my worst I find it hard to do this but there is so much to be said for relaxing the body. I often find that my shoulders are almost up to my ears & I'm holding myself tense without realising.
breathing: making sure that I breath correctly & am not breathing too shallow
There is plenty of information on this website about things like this.
Please try not to lose hope & lean on your girlfriend. I'm sure that you would expect her to do the same if the roles were reversed.
You will get through this & you will be ok. Just keep telling yourself this.
Take care
Kel
x
Thanks for the replies thus far guys.
Today I just feel like I'm having a losing battle. It feels like I'm not properly part of this world, like I can't think straight and suicidal fears keep popping in to my head. I feel lost and like I'm having real trouble coping. I don't want to have to fight this forever. I just want to get on with my life.
It's making me feel awful and I sweat so much. Does anyone else sweat?
I hate it I hate it!!!!
Hi David, I'm am better now not fully recovers of course but it's only been a few weeks, I say better now because when I went through my Noncturnal ones I was waking up every 3 hrs pouring sweat and chest and arms on fire
so yup I've been there n sure many others have, it's normal but will end when you are ok to cope with it better, just think it may feel like it's never going to go but it will, believe me
Thanks guys that is helpful.
It's just so weird when I lose interest in life as I normally love life, I also hate the sweating and the uncontrollable stupid thoughts.
It's crazy as I was feeling great!
Hi David,
I too was feeling great at one time as I'm sure most in this forum were, you will start feeling that again but you need to allow yourself to feel that way, it will happen, I've gone from feeling great to how your feeling back to close yo being myself again
I'm at a point in my life where I would NEVER thought I would get to, like I mentioned,
that won't happen until your able to accept and deal with, as you will, it just happens where your going to say enough of this I'm not going to let it control my life nvr has before so why now
It's so surreal as one moment I'll wake up and the day will go fine then I'll find myself thinking and obsessing over anxiety even if I'm having a good day which then makes it kick in and then I feel awful.
I'll start thinking weird things and then everything goes funny. Eg. Earlier I was at the office at work and my boss was chatting to me and I just thought oooh can I trust her and then I got paranoid people were evil again. It's so bloody weird!
Once this train of thought starts anything can seem negative from watching TV to driving my car. But then the next day/hour/minute I'll love the things I felt negative about.
I've also got this constant thought in the back of my mind that soon I might kill myself, go mad or die in some strange way. I can even picture my family coming to visit me in the mental home or at my funeral.
It's horrible as I don't want to feel like this.
Then I get symptoms of sweating, intense heat around my shoulders, and adrenaline like mad and then I can't seem to shake it. Tonight I feel like the world isn't real or quite right and we're trapped in this body.
I assume this is all part and parcel of my very anxious mind?
I appreciate all replies as they really help me!
I have been on Sertraline for 4 months now. I was warned that my symptoms would get worse for the first 3 to 4 weeks and they did. It was very hard to get through and I drove my kids and husband mad.
I am now improving and I am so glad I stuck with the sertraline. It is a slow process but I am gradually feeling like my old self.
Hang on in there! Anything good takes time.
(daughter got to get on coach at 5am which is why I'm up at 4.49am! so tired)
So everything I mentioned in my last post are normal anxiety traits others experience and the sertraline is making it harder for me at the mo?
hello again!
The Sertraline definitely worsened my symptoms for the first few weeks of taking it. I was warned by my gp that this would happen and was given diazepam to help me through.
Very gradually my anxiety and panicking has eased off although I still have bad patches. I believe it is worth persevering with sertraline although after about ten days I nearly stopped taking it. I don't have too many side effects apart from tiredness.
That is my experience and speaking to others, they have been through similar.
Good luck!:)
Yeah I must admit things are hard at the mo.
Today I feel really odd and very anxious. The same feeling of being trapped in my body and making myself scared of everything. It's so stupid yet no matter what I tell myself I can't seem to fight it.
Hi David,
Sorry that you're having a bad day.
The way that you feel is not stupid. You can't help it.
Although I often am not able to follow my own advice....what you need to do is not to "fight" the way that you feel but try to accept it & let it wash over you. This method is used by Dr Claire Weekes. I would recommend that you read her book. If you are constantly fighting the way that you feel then you will not be able to relax. I think that the key is to distract yourself & try to immerse yourself in something so as not to dwell on how you're feeling.
I'm not sure if this will help you but I wanted to reply to you post to try to offer you some comfort.
Keep your chin up
Kel
x
sb001f8994
07-10-10, 12:59
Hi,
I think we sometimes alienate ourselves when feeling particularly bad. We dont want others to enter our world, ask us about anything we want to be alone but not want to be alone, if that makes sense? I often question my life, meanings of things, my husband says I over analise everything but most great people have done this for centuries and quite alot of them suffered depression and dark times. I think this is just part of this anxiety and we shouldnt go too deeply into why we think these thoughts we just do!
I must admit I think into things far too much and it drives me to anxiety.
Today I'm at my worst ever. Been in bed all day, got up to try and take my mind off things then just suddenly freaked myself out somehow and down went a diazepam. Sadly it hasn't done much and that was over an hour ago.
I feel awful. Totally paranoid I'm going to end up in a mental home, can't stop thinking stupid things, can't eat, everything feels wrong and surreal.
Feel like I'm going manic!!
Hi David,
You won't end up in a "mental home". You're just going through a rough time. You will come through this & things will improve. You just have to keep telling yourself this.
Staying in bed all day will not help you feel any better. I don't know what your situation is with regards to work but when I was signed off work a few years ago I used to try to have a routine each day. It will help. I used to walk to the shop to get a paper so that I would get some fresh air & exercise & then have something to read. I think that it's important to get out of the house if you can manage it. If not then at least stand at the door or open a window so that you can get some fresh air. I used to do plenty of reading aswell. I also used to write in a journal each day (which I am doing again at the moment due to going through a bit of a dip).
By staying out of bed during the day, it will help to regulate your sleeping during the evening.
I know what it's like to not be able to eat but try to eat what you can. I always try to drink plenty of fluids. Nibble on biscuits & cereal - anything that you can. I find that I feel more like eating in the evening so I try to make the most of that as I know that I won't each much the following day.
I know that it's difficult when you're feeling so overwhelmed but try to do what you can.
Take care
Kel
x
sb001f8994
07-10-10, 16:32
Hi again,
On a lighter note, my psychiatrist once told me those who think they are mad or affraid of going mad are completely sane and those who think they are totally sane are most definately mad as hatters!
These feelings will pass, it seems an eternity but they will pass. For me having a good clear out (cupboards, drawers, shelves) always works as a good distraction but I have had times when all I want to do is hide away from the world and let it pass.
Hope you are feeling brighter soon.
Take care
Hello again,
I felt exactly as you do at the moment about 8 weeks ago. I couldn't eat and just wanted to escape from myself. I thought I would never come out the other end and horrible thoughts do go through your head. The worst thing was that I couldn't read a book or magazine because I just couldn't concentrate for long enough. I am still not well but am coping much better.
I joined a health club and started swimming up and down,up and down!
The sauna definitely helps you to relax -for a short while. When I got really anxious I took the dog for long walks to try and escape.
I am self employed - a small hotel-and was therefore unable to take a break and when I did go away I had to take my very demanding 16yr old-maybe that was a good thing.
I have had anxiety on and off for years, the worst attack 25 years ago when pregnant with my first child. At 8 months we suffered a family tragedy and this triggered off extreme panic attacks and anxiety.
You think you will be locked up but you won't. You will get through it even though it doesn't seem like it. Try to eat sweet stuff, it goes down easily!
I have seen my brother like this as well. He went through a nasty, expensive divorce but I think he has come through the other side a much nicer and compassionate person. He is also much more laid back.
I am a Northerner and say things as they are - just think of the good things in your life and how much they mean to you. You will start feeling better soon.
Good luck:D
Hi
Sorry to hear you still feel bad - I know that saying that how you feel will eventually ease, may not help right now, but hopefully it will give some comfort in a small way.
Have you been to see your gp? Did you say that you have just started medication? if so, then for a while it can often make you feel worse before you start to feel better.
Staying in bed all day is what I used to do when I was at my worst, and I started to feel better when I made myself get up and do things, no mattter how small - just getting some routine helped. Could you try and keep out of bed during the day? It will help.
I was not able to watch tv or do anything apart from the basics but it did help doing the basic stuff.
Are you managing to eat anything? Keep your diet as healthy as possible and get plenty of water, which will help.Try and stay off anything with caffeine in, as that was and still is one of my triggers.
Can you get out for a walk, somewhere peaceful ? Exercise does help. I can still feel as you do sometimes if I am not being active.
Carol - What your husband says is exactly what my partner says! that I think too much! :wacko:I just think people who suffer with anxiety tend to that, even though it doesn't mean its a bad thing.
David - I was out on Sertraline and came of (not suggesting that you do) because (nearly) of all the reasons you have outlined. Although I knew I loved my son & husband, I didn't feel it at all. I didn't feel alive anymore like a shell to scare to leave my bedroom. I knew that if I kept using S Sertraline it would eventually work, but this was my second lot of meds and I was getting too scare to continue there use.
So what I am trying to say is hang in there, it appears to be a normal response.
Good luck
Thank you so much for your support guys.
I find it hard to distract myself when even when doing things it's still on my mind. Anything can make me have an anxious thought. From looking at people on tv to getting comfortable in my bed. It's hard to believe this is all anxiety. It's crippling me and I hate it :(
wigglywoo12
07-10-10, 22:03
hi david
so sorry to hear your still suffering i have spoken to you a few times on pm i have been on escitalopram 10mg for 2 weeks and now on 20mg im touching every peice of wood as i type this but wow and i mean wow its like nothing was ever wrong they have kicked in big style i still feel a little bit of anxiety but its managable i am even going to return to work soon thats how good im am i know its not the end i realise that but im taking cbt now its subsided and am able to focus on it it felt very strange when i was with my cbt councilor the other day and i did the questionaire and scoring 1 was very good and 8 was very severe anxiety and i was hitting scores of between 1 and 3 she told me i have mild anxiety and depression because meds had kicked in if i had done the qusetionaire 4 weeks ago i would have scored either 7 or 8 for almost every question i hope this has given you hope david as i was just as bad as you i really recommend that you mention escitalopram to your gp they may not work for everyone i hope they work for you as good as they have me.stay strong and keep the faith :) ps pm me if you need me
Thanks wiggly that certainly helps. I'm on 50mg sertraline at the mo. 2 weeks in and today's been awful but I'm doing my best to think positively it's just so hard as I'm still so concerned about losing the plot
I just did a bad thing. I googled insanity and it said prolonged periods of stress/anxiety can permanently damage the brain and you can snap and end up totally insane.
I fear this so much which then makes me worse as I think I'm fuelling my brain to snap.
This is horrific i just want to love life!
I can see you're very anxious over this, I've experienced it myself however I wasn't as vocal about it as you (so probably not as bad).
The only thing I can really suggest that helped me is to LET your girlfriend support you, I still have moments even now where she feels like a stranger and she has accepted that she has to "warm me up" to her.
I really don't know if you can relate to this, but when the entire world terrifies you and you feel like crying your eyes out, just having somone there for you who understands you if you allow them to can help you find your way again. Its not gonna make you any less of a man to let her see you like that, It just sounds like its great you have a girlfriend in your life right now and developing trust with her when you're feeling at your worst could give you a lot of comfort when you need it most.
Can prolonged anxiety/stress end up with me eventually cracking and going insane?
I'm starting to doubt it's anxiety now and thinking I have a deteriorating mental illness
David,
You're not going mad. You're just having a rough time.
Please try not scare yourself by searching the internet. I have a rule now that I only look at this website with regards to my anxiety. The internet is so huge nowadays that you could spend a lifetime looking at it. This could be one of your steps to getting better that: you impose this restriction on yourself. Sometimes you can have too much information.
I can relate to random things triggering anxious thoughts. That's the cruel thing about anxiety - it can be so unpredictable.
I used to (and still do) find reading information helped me - almost like coaching myself. There are some good articles on this website which may help you.
Keep your chin up David. You will come through this. Lean on your girlfriend for support & try to look after yourself.
Kel
x
Update: a few good days, anxiety lingering in the background but I won't let it take hold.
Couple of tips I've introduced to myself: Remind myself it is only anxiety, people are all the same, I'm on sertraline so that effects my mental state, I'm not alone and to keep thinking of good things if I can.
I'm still suffering a little thinking I'm going to crack one day I must admit and I'm obsessed with looking into life too closely and over analysing everything.
Still I hope in time I can beat this.
David,
I am so glad you are slightly better. For some reason I'd been thinking of you.
Probably because you descriptions of anxiety are similar to mine. I am also on Sertraline.
Take care and look after yourself. Do things you enjoy when you can and eat chocolate! :yesyes:
Hi David,
I just wondered how you were feeling?
Kel
x
11 days is not long. They take a few weeks to kick in fully...give it another week or so.
This kind of deep thinking is hard to control, but possible. Have you considered asking your GP for a referral for CBT. Maybe you have already done this? The trick is to control your thoughts...not easy, but possible.
Read Claire Weeks. At least while reading you'll have your mind occupied and pulled back to more earthy feelings
Feeling better now but not perfect though at lot of the physical symptoms have subsided it's just the thoughts I want gone now.
I accept them but am still convinced they shouldn't be there and I'm going mad.
I still feel alien to other people and over think everything. When that's gone I'll feel much much better!!
It's changed now.
I still feel like people are strange and alien and I over analyse everything. However I'm not getting any physical symptoms so much now.
I'm always out, been feeling fine but still don't feel like I think normally it's weird...
Hi David,
I just read you're post and can really relate to what you are saying. I too often feel that i don't know or recognise my friends and family, that people look odd or different and i am somehow better being on my own. I toI o also worry that I am going mad due to the very very odd thoughts I am having... for example, sometimes I will be talking to someone and think, are you really real or just in my imaginition and I get very scared thinking how are we different?? sometimes peoples heads just don't look right on their bodies, as if they don't fit together.... its so hard to expalin and i think this makes this symptom all the more scary. it is very terrifying to be in a room with your love ones and feel terrified as you cannot get reassurance from them as looking at them is the thing that is causing you the anxiety. The rationale part of my brain realises that this is depersonalsiation/ derealisation but when it is happening I definetly feel as if it is real.... that I am either mad or that things are not real. It is a terrifying symptoms and I really do feel for you. I have been on mitrazapine for a little over two weeks now and am def having times when these feelings aren;t there, which gives me hope that it is just anxiety and that everything around me is ok really. what i have found has helped me over the last few weeks is getting a routine into my day, to try not to avoid being around people and to have some positive thoughts you can say ot self when these feeligns come on, such as this is just dp/ dr.. its not real, or what i use often now is that i tell myself i am strong and can cope and these feelings will pass. Have your read much on dp/ dr. There is a good self help booking called overcoming depersoanlisation and feelings of unreality... i have found some bits quite helpful. x
Wow Ems. Good to hear someone else feels like this. It's like I don't feel connected with the world and people just are weird. I'll always over think things. Some days a lot worse than others.
Yesterday I saw a building that looked like a mental asylum and my brain went into overdrive with negative thoughts again. Sound familiar?
Do u get any physical symptoms when it gets bad? I get sweating big time, adrenaline surge and hot around my shoulders etc.
I'm interested in hearing others responses and coping mechanisms. I must admit though even sometimes when I do tell myself it's dp it doesn't help. Do u find this too? It's so weird.
I also find if I think about things I can find fear in anything but when I'm cracking on with a busy day it doesn't effect me.
god yes, I have the most random nonsensical thouhts and also over think things. i do get physical symptoms a lot when gets really bad, i get heart surges ( or adrenalin rushes), a fuzzy pressure feeling in my head and feel like i just want to scream. are you on any meds at the moment. my psychiatrist prescribed me mitrzapine a few weeks ago and things are still tough but def better than the black hole i was in a few week ago. He also suggested prescribing me pregbalin which i declined at the time but think may ask for when i see him on friday. Its actually an anti-eplilepsy medication but found to be good for people with generalised anxiety disorder, and looking at the posts on here people seem to find it quite helpful. Have also been doing a bit of research into dp/ dr and looks at the derealisation research unit in london where they do mention prescribing an anti epilespy medication called lamotragine for people with dp/ dr so i guess this pregbalin may work in the same way. i just feel if these damm odd sensations/ thouhgts would go i could get better! i will keep you posted on the effects of the pregbalin if i start next week xx
ps. - yes i kept trying to say this is just dp/ dr and it was having no effect... i guess we are just so anxious that our minds cannot accept it. now i just tell myself constantly that i am strong and can cope and use this to try and block other negative thoughts taking over or to start over analysing things. i think what i quite common with people who suffer these feelings of unreality is to ruminate on them/ try and explain them in there own minds. i read a quote on another website about the futility of doing this- basically even if we could describe these feelings perfectly it would not make them go away. instead it keeps us stuck in our own minds and introspecting so we become more aware of the thoughts/ feeligns and even trigger them. but it is a damm fight !xx
It most certainly is a fight. Do you sometimes find you get anxiety and odd thoughts for no reason whatsoever it seems?
Meds wise I'm on my 4th week of sertraline on the lowest dose and have diazepam if things get really bad. They're doing something I must admit. I just need to sort my thoughts out now.
It's amazing to hear someone else is going through the same thing. It helps both of us!
Do you also find thoughts just go through your mind all the time even sometimes without physical symptoms? This goes out to anyone too
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