Is this apart of my anxiety?

[Ambers]

I wasn't sure where to put this and whether it is apart of me or my anxiety and wondered whether CBT can help?

I am having CBT for PA and anxiety...mainly for Agoraphobic feeling when out and about, usually to do with feeling enclosed and being alone.

I have slight OCD.

But I have realised that I worry about everything I say to other people. For example I spoke to another mum in the park, she is really lovely, nice person. We chatted about our children, her problems and days out.. I didn't say anything out of the ordinary. Now I am worried she will dislike me or think I was mad after speaking to me. I am like this all the time and is proably why I have so little new friends..because I worry about every detail of what I have said. I analyse every details and wished I just kept my mouth shut. I worry about my grammar, my accent and if I said soemthing to upset someone else.

Yet I think I am quietly confident person, and like myself my views and I like that I am a liberal giving person...so I cant be that bad, can I?

I wish I was like every other mum...feel so bogged down with worry.

[Kell]

Hi Ambers,

I'm sure that everyone on this website can relate to you feeling like you want to be like everyone else. I know that I have this thought often.

However, my boyfriend pointed out that everyone has their problems & that you never know what is going on in others peoples lives & therefore you shouldn't summise. For all you know the lady that you spoke to could have her own issues & feel exactly the same way that you do.


Try to look at the positives:

that you were able to have a conversation with her. Other people may have felt too self conscious to do the same
that you get yourself out & about to the park
Try not to dwell on the negative thoughts - let them wash over you. Things will improve.

Look after yourself

Kel
x

[JaneC]

Hi Ambers,

Yes, I'm sure it is part of your anxiety and I do think you might find CBT helpful, in that it would help you to see you have no reason for thinking that the other mum thought any of these negative things about you. I had CBT quite a long time ago and one of the ways I still find it most useful is in stopping these very kind of thoughts, involving what's going on in other people's minds.

Like Kell, I think it's good that you could actually start a conversation with somebody, and many people would be grateful for you doing so because they couldn't do it themselves. Maybe you actually made this woman's day by speaking to her! xx

[Ambers]

Thank you, and yes both are right, I just worry all the time about the most silly things x

[Nigel]

Hi Ambers,

Well done for striking up a conversation with that other mum in the park. Be proud of yourself and stop worrying :winks:

How you describe it sounds sort of like ‘social anxiety’ where a person gets anxious around other people – fearing they’ve said or done something wrong or silly, or afraid of being negatively judged by that other person.

If the truth be know, the other person could well be having similar thoughts... :unsure:

Take care,
Nigel

[ljd]

Hi,

You should be proud that you chatted to the other mother its a positive thing.

Im sure a lot people wish we could be like someone else, i certainly do, but everyone has ups and downs and their own problems to deal with.

I also worry about saying the wrong tings to people and stuff but i just see it if they dont like it its down to them not me. im being me as long as im friendly and not rude to them.

tc