oh no oh no oh no please help

[BunnyMazonas]

Not good.

I'm here in the office and I can't cope. Every fibre of my self is saying I can't be here, I don't want to be here, I cannot stay here. I've gone back and forth to the toilets somany times just to not be in all the noise and activity and the office. I can feel a lump of panic welling up inside me and I can't work out why it is there or where it came from. I can't stop doing the thing I did on Friday. I'm playing with the safety pin and the stapler remover and I'm all urge-filled.

I did the same thing on Friday and there are loads of marks left over. I thought I would feel better after the weekend but I just slept through most of it and today I am back in and feeling it all over again. http://www.recoveryourlife.com/forum/images/smilies/sad.gif

I cannot go home although I really want to because I amalready in trouble for having so much time off sick due to side effects of my meds and my anxiety problem - I'm supposed to have a HR disciplinary at some point soon over it so I cannot absolutely CANNOT go home but I feel just awful and I can't calm down. The grounding techniques I was taught aren't helping.

I've called the at-work counselling service but all the cousnellors are busy so I have to wait for a call back and that might not be until after I've gon ehome this evening and I am going crazy again

[cornwall dan]

Can you take a break in the fresh air.This helps me sometimes because seeing the world moving around you can focus your mind that everythings ok nobodies panicking and everythings fine.

[Jaco45er]

My absolute sympathy goes out to you bunny, because I know exactly what you are going through as I have been in that very same situation.

Try getting some water and sip, it helps flush those horrible anxiety causing chemicals around your body.

Breathing, think about your breathing, breath slowly through your nose, and out from your mouth, hold your breath for 7 seconds, and breath out for 8 seconds, and keep your back straight and upright.

Try and mentally visualise that you are breathing out the tension.

Think in NOW, not in the future, concentrate on what you are doing or the breathing, do not let your thoughts wander to "what if's" and those pesky HR bunch.

Are you getting help for your anxiety in the form of therapy or have you tried any self help reading?

Some positive news, I have been exactly where you are now, and it's all a distant memory, I sat there like you did, thinking I would be like it forever. That's false, you won't be like this forever, get today over with, then start putting a plan together for your road to recovery.

Hang in there, you can do it, not long now.

TC

Jaco

[boppers]

You can do this! Could you go out at lunch and take a short walk? Like cornwall dan suggested, that can really help!

Is there a project that needs doing that won't take too long? I find sometimes that once I get working on a project, it gets easier to get through the day because I focus on the project and not on my racing thoughts.

[heavenly]

How are you now? Can you go out for a walk whilst waiting for the call back from the counselling people? I am so sorry you are feeling like this but it will pass, I promise you. xxx

[BunnyMazonas]

Thank you all for your support. I went outside for fresh air for a 10min break,. but I just ended up doing something silly :weep:. I came back in but now I'm feeling bad still and emotonsl andbrain running too fast

thank you I know you are all trying so much to help and I am grateful but I am going crazy and I don't know why.

[allergyphobia]

you must really try to slow down and breathe. i know when we feel like we are going crazy we feel so hectic and are brains whizz and we can't slow down to process what is going on.

i used to be terrified of being trapped at work and i ended up taking a lot of time off. like jaco says this doesn't last forever, i am now back at work full time and don't think anything of it.

the key is keeping busy - what job do you do? you need to start doing something you can get really engrossed in

x

[Jaco45er]

Bunny

Your adrenaline is just running riot making you feel like you need to bolt. Honest, if you can just slow the breathing down, well it won't make you cooler than the Fonz, but it will start to help you cope better.

Your body is in fight or flight mode, you are not going crazy, that's why you are feeling overwhelmed, and it is just your mind telling your body to get ready, and your breathing will be shallow and tense.

I know it's hard, but if you can just try and slow things down.

I sometimes took a paper bag to the loo, and breathed in and out of it slowly, that used to help my anxiety subside a little.

[Nigel]

Hi BunnyMazonas,

Sorry you’re having another difficult day. Can you put the safety pin and stapler remover out of sight and out of reach somewhere. Did you read that self harm link (http://www.nomorepanic.co.uk/articles/selfharm/) for other ideas? Like the elastic band one? Would something like that work?

And try some of Jaco’s suggestions – about breathing and taking sips of water.

Take care :hugs:
Nigel

[DavidJ85]

Dude think of something you like, something nice or think of your comfort zone wherever it is. Also chat to your doc, see if he'll put you on diazepam it can help calm you in these situations.

Remember you've been fine and you will be fine!!

[blueangel]

Hi Bunny

I know it's tough (wish I'd checked on here a bit earlier and seen your message), but try and find youself something to do that will occupy you - I presume you do some sort of clerical work? Something I've always found therapeutic is getting rid of stuff that you don't need any more, like old files or paperwork. I suspect this is because I like throwing things away! It does help - or see whether someone wants you to tiday out some cupboards or something like that,a s you can stick your head in there and ignore everyone.

Like Jaco, I have been there as well. Just after I started working in the NHS 20 years ago (literally, about 2 weeks after I started), I thought that my marriage was going down the pan and I wanted to run round the car park screaming. I threw away loads of old files instead and it did actually make me feel better.

If you can't manage a day at a time at first, try an hour at a time. It does get easier, honestly.

[BunnyMazonas]

Okay.

Thank you, I am a little better now. The counsellor called me back and we had a long talk. I am back on ground level now!

Thank you all so much for your support. Iamgoing to speak to my GP soon about this - I'd been better for agres and then changed meds and now I'm all crazy-brained again

:hugs: