montyforever
25-10-10, 02:00
Hi im new :blush:
Ive had anxitey for years now but its all come to a head now! Ill try my best to explain fully :)
It started when i was 11 (16 now) I had a panic attack while picking up my nan from the train station. But soon got through it and no problems for a while after that!
Then i started secondary school, was fine i was never bullied but i had a small group of friends that had very bad attendance so i was often on my own at lunch times/breaks and gradually this got worse until i had to drop out of school at 14 due to anxiety (not panic attacks) :unsure:
At that time i had just got a horse on loan and he made my life worth living again, he was my everything and the reason i got up everyday!
So for about 8 months life was fab, i was seeing my friends, spending time with my horse then i got the worst phone call of my life, my ponys owners wanted him back. After i heard the news it wasnt a panic attack, but i was in shock. I really thought whats the point anymore? But a friend managed to get me back on my feet again, and i bought another horse.
For a while i was ok, but then i started to stop doing other things, i wouldnt go out with my friends ect and the anxiety set in.
I then got another horse who has a tendancy to injure her self :huh:
So i was getting stressed out alot!
Things slowly got worse without me noticing, i was only going to the stables to see my horses and then after a while i was getting the same "feelings" at the stables, sick, dizzy, panicy ect.
So i stopped going to the stables, and then when i tried to go again i couldnt.
I havent been to see my horses in months, and it has now turned into agoraphobia, the furthest i can go is across the road to my nans and even thats a struggle!
Im in a hole now, and i cant see a way out. My horses are my life and without them i dont feel like a whole person without them ..
Help! :weep:
Ive had anxitey for years now but its all come to a head now! Ill try my best to explain fully :)
It started when i was 11 (16 now) I had a panic attack while picking up my nan from the train station. But soon got through it and no problems for a while after that!
Then i started secondary school, was fine i was never bullied but i had a small group of friends that had very bad attendance so i was often on my own at lunch times/breaks and gradually this got worse until i had to drop out of school at 14 due to anxiety (not panic attacks) :unsure:
At that time i had just got a horse on loan and he made my life worth living again, he was my everything and the reason i got up everyday!
So for about 8 months life was fab, i was seeing my friends, spending time with my horse then i got the worst phone call of my life, my ponys owners wanted him back. After i heard the news it wasnt a panic attack, but i was in shock. I really thought whats the point anymore? But a friend managed to get me back on my feet again, and i bought another horse.
For a while i was ok, but then i started to stop doing other things, i wouldnt go out with my friends ect and the anxiety set in.
I then got another horse who has a tendancy to injure her self :huh:
So i was getting stressed out alot!
Things slowly got worse without me noticing, i was only going to the stables to see my horses and then after a while i was getting the same "feelings" at the stables, sick, dizzy, panicy ect.
So i stopped going to the stables, and then when i tried to go again i couldnt.
I havent been to see my horses in months, and it has now turned into agoraphobia, the furthest i can go is across the road to my nans and even thats a struggle!
Im in a hole now, and i cant see a way out. My horses are my life and without them i dont feel like a whole person without them ..
Help! :weep: