Timbo
29-10-10, 00:31
Just registered and first post. Have to accept that I do get panic attacks and GAD even though my social persona is 'cool and assured'! That's taken a battering when I burst into tears in the Dr's waiting room this morning. Couple of weeks back I was on cloud 9 - and now I'm scared to go to sleep!
Sounds stupid maybe but our cat is seriously ill and we know he's nearly at the end - we've done all the tests and even got a 2nd opinion today. Seems most likely now that it's a brain tumour. Vet's given him a steroid injection which has perked him up a bit, but we know it's temporary - how the he'll do you weigh up giving him some more life (and not playing god) against what he might be going through and the stress and pain it's causing me and my girlfriend to see our once lively cat withering before us?! I can't stand the thought of making the decision to put him to sleep - one moment he's with us, the next he's dead! That sends me into panic. To some people who maybe a bit harder than I am might think 'it's just a cat' but I get like an emotional claustrophobia when I think I won't be able to see someone or something again. Last night I tried to sleep and immediately dreamt he was already dead and I couldn't stand it - I woke in a panic like I was suffocating and had to get out of the house in the air. This only works so far as it's like no-one or nothing can change the situation and then this escalates the panic. Hence I'm afraid to sleep tonight. Anyone else get this kind of 'emotional claustrophobia' as I call it that you can't ever see someone again and you have to get out but even then no one can actually change the situation and so you panic more - or is it just me?
I've also had an annoying whistling in my ear for the last week which has also sent me into anxiety, fearing it will be permanent, even though the Dr on Monday said it was caused my congestion and there was nothing he could do and it would go of it's own accord. This didn't do anything to reassure me and it's only when I went back to see a different Dr this morning in a real state that she reassured me it was just catarrh and gave me steroid spray to clear it . She spent some time with me and asked if there was anything else going on - at which point I blurted out about the situation with our cat and which I confessed sounded lame but it was as it was - she then gave me a few days supply of diazepam to help with breaking the cycle of anxiety. Maybe I should take one yet I'm afraid it might 'numb my consciousness' and I feel I want to be fully alert in case I 'lose something' and then can't get it back while I'm 'comatose'. Stupid I know but that's how the panic feels - like this emotional claustrophobia which I now realise is a sort of panic attack.
Don't know if this is a usual type of forum post but it's helped to write it.
Sounds stupid maybe but our cat is seriously ill and we know he's nearly at the end - we've done all the tests and even got a 2nd opinion today. Seems most likely now that it's a brain tumour. Vet's given him a steroid injection which has perked him up a bit, but we know it's temporary - how the he'll do you weigh up giving him some more life (and not playing god) against what he might be going through and the stress and pain it's causing me and my girlfriend to see our once lively cat withering before us?! I can't stand the thought of making the decision to put him to sleep - one moment he's with us, the next he's dead! That sends me into panic. To some people who maybe a bit harder than I am might think 'it's just a cat' but I get like an emotional claustrophobia when I think I won't be able to see someone or something again. Last night I tried to sleep and immediately dreamt he was already dead and I couldn't stand it - I woke in a panic like I was suffocating and had to get out of the house in the air. This only works so far as it's like no-one or nothing can change the situation and then this escalates the panic. Hence I'm afraid to sleep tonight. Anyone else get this kind of 'emotional claustrophobia' as I call it that you can't ever see someone again and you have to get out but even then no one can actually change the situation and so you panic more - or is it just me?
I've also had an annoying whistling in my ear for the last week which has also sent me into anxiety, fearing it will be permanent, even though the Dr on Monday said it was caused my congestion and there was nothing he could do and it would go of it's own accord. This didn't do anything to reassure me and it's only when I went back to see a different Dr this morning in a real state that she reassured me it was just catarrh and gave me steroid spray to clear it . She spent some time with me and asked if there was anything else going on - at which point I blurted out about the situation with our cat and which I confessed sounded lame but it was as it was - she then gave me a few days supply of diazepam to help with breaking the cycle of anxiety. Maybe I should take one yet I'm afraid it might 'numb my consciousness' and I feel I want to be fully alert in case I 'lose something' and then can't get it back while I'm 'comatose'. Stupid I know but that's how the panic feels - like this emotional claustrophobia which I now realise is a sort of panic attack.
Don't know if this is a usual type of forum post but it's helped to write it.