View Full Version : The feeling of dread when something good happens!!
Does anyone else get this? i didnt know where else to post it. but at the moment anything good or fun or exciting scares me!!
like for example, i am excited about christmas but sometimes when i think about christmas i get that feeling of dread and then a fear of dying and missing it! and this is even more silly, this morning my friend sent me an expansion pack to the sims 3, i have wanted to play it for ages and so i opened my post and saw the game and got excited about playing it later today and suddenly bam, im hit with the dread feeling of omg im going to die or something bad will happen before i get a chance to play it!!!
why do i get this? how do i get rid of it? its starting to ruin things that should be fun!!
its driving me mad!!
.Hi Jen,
I also get that feeling, it's like i cant look forward to anything because i thing something might happen to me. I know its all part of my GAD and hopefully once the meds kick in i will start to look forward with confidence.
Play your sims and enjoy:Dx
Yep I get it a lot and it's stupid. Then I'll dwell on it and everything around me becomes scary if that makes sense.
When we have significant events in our life, we create certain belief structures.
For example - when something bad happens, we may internalise a belief that it's "important for me to avoid XXXX" .... or "if X happens then it means Y to me" ... regardless of how likely that event is to happen again, or whether we have even truly understood what happened, or why. We create these beliefs totally unconsciously, so are usually not even aware what the specific internally held belief is.
You filter the world around you through many things - to then create your own perception of the world around you - and a major part of your filter mechanism is your beliefs - so any unsupportive (limiting) beliefs will get in your way and make you view things in a way that can worry you and create conflict/concerns etc.
When this crops up you can make notes on what you feel about the circumstances at the time. Maybe in a diary or notebook - and ask yourself what you believe about what's going on. This will likely highlight a pattern of thinking that you can then deal with, with the right help.
The fortunate thing is that beliefs are pretty simple to change - once you have established the relevant one(s) to let go. Time Line Therapy(R) takes you to the moment before you created the belief .... so by definition you have not decided it's true for you yet .... hence it disappears. The method will enable you to dramatically change how you view the events that used to bother you, since your filtering method has changed.
A bit like changing the lens on a projector - or giving a different colour filter, so it goes from blue to red ..... everything appears differently!
Nig
I see what you mean Nigel but it feels like sometimes we don't have control over what we feel or think and it's often negative or frightening
gettingfedupnow
29-10-10, 19:46
not sure if this is what you mean but i for example will feel good and maybe booka holiday or something but then once i done it get anxious feelings because i think what if im anxious before i go and it ends up rubbish
That's not really what happens with me but it may be to others
Hi! I can totally relate to you. I posted something similiar not long ago about I feel like it's tempting fate if I felt anxious free and like myself again. I think that about birthdays and Christmas and what if something happens to me. Its so annoying to think this way but I don't know how to change it! x
Yep. Right there with you.
I have a Ski holiday booked in January, i love skiing. I cant wait.
BUT
I dread it. I think :
'what if im ill'
'What if i panic on the plane'
'i'm going to be so far from home'
'i am going to get altitude sickness'
'What if i break my leg'
'What if i find i hate skiing when i get there'
'I have made my family get into skiing and then i am going to pack it in'
I get myself into such a state.....
Im right there with you.
Thank you all for your replies,
In a way it is nice to know i dont suffer with this alone, obviously im not glad you all have to go through this but it is nice to know im not alone!
thats exactly it jonny, sometimes i can stop the dreaded thoughts but still the feeling is there and it is so hard to get rid of, its not too bad if its about something that is not too far away but christmas is still a couple of months away so im goiong to be feeling like this until xmas is over!
i painted my living room yesterday which ive wanted to do for ages but when i put that first bit of paint on the dread feeling popped up and i was scared that i wouldnt get to finish it or i would die straight after finishing it so i wouldnt enjoy it! its all finished now and im ok again now, the feeling has gone about that now. it just drives me round the bend!!
i manage to distract myself from all other anxiety symptoms but this is so difficult to ignore. and i hate the fact that im feeling something that i know i shouldnt be. i should be able to control how i feel. if that makes sense.
xx
Yep I can totally totally relate it to that. It's like when you're in that feeling of dread it's hard to break the cycle of thought. I even find when trying to distract myself it still doesn't work sometimes
Exactly David, then i get stuck in a vicious cycle of feeling dread and trying to ignore it by doing somehting to distract yourself and then the feeling seems to get stronger until you cant ignore it.
I like your signature David.:)
It's a song from the black eyed peas! Youtube it, it's good!
Jen do you ever find that you just want to fit in and be the same as everyone else yet feel alien because of all the intrusive things you think and feel?
I feel like something bad's gonna happen to me, like I'll go mad or something or if this thought pattern persists will I ever fit into reality again or is this just me lol!
Hi Jen,
I think there could be several reasons for it. Sometimes a person doesn’t feel they deserve good things to happen or to be happy, so when that threatens to happen they subconsciously look for ways for it not to happen. Bringing things back in line with their beliefs about what they deserve.
Other people always seem to dwell on the negatives, hence feel that everything in their life always goes wrong. Again, things going well and being happy clash with that belief, so they look for reasons why it could all go wrong.
Another thing is that a person can sometimes feel comfortable feeling uncomfortable. It may sound bizarre but when a person is anxious they get used to feeling all doom and gloom about everything. It becomes the norm. Then when something breaks that pattern, it doesn’t feel right. And what does an anxious person do when something doesn’t feel right? They worry!
And there’s one last reason that most people don’t realise. The physical feelings of panic and the physical feelings of excitement are almost identical. What they initially experience is ‘excitement’, but they interpret it as ‘panic’ because that’s what they’re used to.
Take care :)
Nigel
It's a song from the black eyed peas! Youtube it, it's good!
Jen do you ever find that you just want to fit in and be the same as everyone else yet feel alien because of all the intrusive things you think and feel?
I feel like something bad's gonna happen to me, like I'll go mad or something or if this thought pattern persists will I ever fit into reality again or is this just me lol!
Can anyone relate to this? It's awful and I think it's all relative
happycamper
01-11-10, 11:35
Hey Jen,
Oh I can so relate to your feeling of dread when you think about Christmas, the last 2 or 3 Christmases putting the decorations back in their box afterwards I've seriously thought I'd never see them come out again because something terrible happening was just around the corner. It hasn't made sense until I'm now trying to understand this anxiety malarky.
Fully understand where yo're coming from chuck. It's rubbish isn't it...
Let's all try and have a good one this year? XXX
It's a song from the black eyed peas! Youtube it, it's good!
Jen do you ever find that you just want to fit in and be the same as everyone else yet feel alien because of all the intrusive things you think and feel?
I feel like something bad's gonna happen to me, like I'll go mad or something or if this thought pattern persists will I ever fit into reality again or is this just me lol !
Yes i do, your not alone on feeling like that at all. :bighug1:
Hi Jen,
I think there could be several reasons for it. Sometimes a person doesn’t feel they deserve good things to happen or to be happy, so when that threatens to happen they subconsciously look for ways for it not to happen. Bringing things back in line with their beliefs about what they deserve.
Other people always seem to dwell on the negatives, hence feel that everything in their life always goes wrong. Again, things going well and being happy clash with that belief, so they look for reasons why it could all go wrong.
Another thing is that a person can sometimes feel comfortable feeling uncomfortable. It may sound bizarre but when a person is anxious they get used to feeling all doom and gloom about everything. It becomes the norm. Then when something breaks that pattern, it doesn’t feel right. And what does an anxious person do when something doesn’t feel right? They worry!
And there’s one last reason that most people don’t realise. The physical feelings of panic and the physical feelings of excitement are almost identical. What they initially experience is ‘excitement’, but they interpret it as ‘panic’ because that’s what they’re used to.
Take care :)
Nigel
Thank you Nigel, your whole post made an awful lot of sense but that last bit (in bold) makes so much sense, that could be exactly what it is. im excited yet i think its panic so i panic some more for good measure lol
thank you :D
Hey Jen,
Oh I can so relate to your feeling of dread when you think about Christmas, the last 2 or 3 Christmases putting the decorations back in their box afterwards I've seriously thought I'd never see them come out again because something terrible happening was just around the corner. It hasn't made sense until I'm now trying to understand this anxiety malarky.
Fully understand where yo're coming from chuck. It's rubbish isn't it...
Let's all try and have a good one this year? XXX
Thank you, im glad you understand. its so nice to see so many people get what im going on about because anyone else (that doesnt suffer with anxiety) thinks im mad lol
and yes we are gonna have a good christmas this year xxx
Hi Jen,
“that could be exactly what it is. im excited yet i think its panic so i panic some more for good measure lol”
Perhaps not so much ‘for good measure’, but rather ‘for good reason’. When a person panics it’s meant to happen because they face some kind of threat, and the panic response is automatically getting them ready to face that threat.
So I suppose the trick is not to take those initial feelings at face value, but to ‘consciously’ re-evaluate them and decide whether it really is panic, or whether it’s excitement.
Take care :)
Nigel
Mudskipper
04-11-10, 13:56
I get these feelings a lot too and I believe it's largely down to my superstitious nature. You could sum it up with the old saying: "Don't count your chickens before they're hatched." The implication is that if you make plans, there's always something out there waiting to wreck them for you, call it fate, chance, malevolent influence or whatever. I'm not sure which one I blame it on, but I'm never happy making plans even for something that may only be a week or so away. That nasty little demon who sits on my shoulder is always just waiting to whisper something in my ear: "Next year? You'll be lucky if you're still here next week!" I know I'm subject to all the same risks and dangers as everyone else but not everyone else allows them to rule their life like this. It's a pretty miserable existence.
i put my xmas decs up on the 1st november in the hoe that it would ease me into xmas and not make me so anxious! seems to be working. people think im mad for putting them up early but it has actually helped me, now when i think of xmas i dont feel dread, i feel happy!!
I feel like I could of written the original post! (apart from the sims lol, I wouldnt know how!)
I look forward to christmas then come the thoughts of dread. I'm going to die, my whole family will be devastated and I'm going to ruin it for them all.
Me and hubby were looking for a holiday next year and I was trying to persuade him to book last minute because when I commit myself to something so far ahead I start to convince myself that I wont be here to see it happen. Hubby has no idea thats why I want to book last min, he thinks I just want a good deal!:whistles:
I don't feel like me anymore. I don't get excited for nights out. If I go out for a meal I choose something thats not so likely to give me food poisioning. I try not to make plans with people incase I can't make it because I get flu or a stomach bug. I feel crazy
Sarah x
xmas eve is tomorrow and my fear is back! im trying to turn the panic into excitememnt and i am excited about xmas but we are all ill with the flu and my kids being poorky makes me anxious anyway so that and the fact its nearly xmas has made me fear the worst again.i know boxing day i will feel fine, its just xmas day, i dont know why but i fear that i will die xmas day! how can i get rid of this? i dont want to ruin xmas for my family!
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