Depression for no reason

[pc19682]

I'm really getting tired of this. Dealing with mild to moderate PA's for about 8 years now. I've been doing ok, but I can't shake the depression. I have a stable family and work life, but I always feel like crap. Always tired. Very little energy to talk to anyone. I can never really have let loose and have fun. I have a fair number of friends and I am surrounded by family, but always feel very alone. Just feel like a bother to everyone. Feel totally drained.

Worst part is I can see all of it. It feels like life is passing me by, and there's nothing I can do about it. I'm kinda surviving, not living.

Anyone feel like this? Am I crazy (I know I am)? As much as I hate it when people tell me I'm crazy for feeling like this, I can accept it if I am.

[Going home]

Hi pc,

True depression doesn't need an 'outside' reason, its an internal imbalance and has no relation to what is going on in your life. Events that are happening in your life can make you fed up or really p****d off, but real depressive illness cares not a jot for what goes on in your life. You can have all the money in the world, a fabulous life etc and still be in the grip of true depression. The best thing to do is find out the difference and then see if it truly describes how you feel.

Anna xx

[moomintroll]

I can categorically tell you YOU ARE NOT CRAZY!!!! :)

This sounds typical of a low/moderate depression to me but obviously I am not a doc and not qualified to diagnose! But you definately don't sound crazy because you are able to 1) Recognise you FEEL crazy! 2) Post on here in a coherent and stable manner!

Seriously, I am not going to tell you not to worry, because you will. I am not going to tell you to cheer up because I know how hard it is! But I will say that I have experienced that EXACT feeling and by the sounds of it a bit worse too(!) and it is simply depression not madness. I felt like I was going to end up in a mental hospital/sectioned/ruined life/lost career/house/everything else, this time last year, and a trip to the docs, 20mg of Citalopram a day and I am back to realising how irrational I really was thinking back then. I am ME again. I am not saying you need meds, as that is very much a personal and situational decision/factor, but do not let anyone tell you that you are crazy for feeling like that.

Please tell your dr ALL of these feelings/thoughts - they are not going to lock you away immediately!! They see these things day in, day out!

:)

[Going home]

Has your doctor ever diagnosed depression? If so you would be on some sort of medication for this...are you?

Anna x

[Tiny]

I feel exactly the same as you I am only 19 and have been depressed since I was 15. I was diagnosed last year and put on antid and sent to a psychiatrist, this helped for a bit but I have recently come to uni and I can feel it all starting again. I dont even have anything to really be depressed about I had a great up bringing, I have a great family and friends and im always surrounded by them so why do I keep feeling like this i dont understand.

[pc19682]

Thank you for all your replies. It is good (and bad) to know that others feel the same way. I think the worst of it is I hear everything you are saying. I have life pretty well. There are certainly many, many people in this world have it worse. The problem is, as I'm sure many of you know, once the depression bear hits, it is almost as if nothing anyone (including myself) says or does matters. Nothing and no one can really help with the pain.


A little more info: I have dealt with two major episodes of panic attacks over the years. I almost lost it the 2nd time. I was very close to being trapped at home. Probably the only that saved me was that the worse attacks were at home :) Anyway, I had to do something. For better or worse, I am on 75mg Effexor and Klonopin. I've thought about increasing dose or trying something else, but I'm not sure I'm ready to deal with that nightmare just yet. I don't take the Klonopin anymore because it makes me too tired.

Thanks again everyone.