Scared of being stuck in this body

[shaz14]

Is anyone else scared to be in their own body? Every morning when I wake up I have an overwhelmimg feeling of dread that I have woken up in the same body. Sounds crazy I know but I hate being me. I hate the thought that I will always be me with this anxiety and a body that feels ill all the time.

I also have a rush of panic everytime this thought goes through my head. I guess I want to get away from me....but that's just not possible :weep:

Does anyone else feel like their mind and body are 2 separate things? Both appear to be broken and I can't seem to fix either. It's really making me hate life and I'm so anxious to make it all go away that I'm scared I will resort to something drastic.

I wonder why I have been put on this earth to lead such a terrifying life. Is any of this real? Oh help, think I'm stuck halfway between sane and mad. It's an awful place to be not one nor the other.

Please can someone reassure me that what I am feeling will go away or that just one other person has felt like this and come out the other side....please help

[ems43]

shaz, I can def relate to what you are saying. I too feel stuck in my body and when I think about it too much it really freaks me out. When people ask what is fuellign my anxiety I always tell them I'm scared of being in my own mind/ body. When you experience symtoms of depersonalisation/ derealisation you can feel the split between your body and your mind, definetly. And these are symtoms of anxiety. Have things remained the same since last time we spoke? Have you had a change in the meds, got any further with the CBT yet? xx

[shaz14]

So glad it's not just me! I have increased Citalopram to 20mg and been prescribed Buspirone (Buspar) although not taking these yet (too scared!) Was hoping the citalopram might do something on their own first before I start filling myself up with meds. I had my 1st session of counselling last week, not sure if that's gonna help but still waiting for CBT.

It really is a miserable existence sometimes and I feel like I'm doing everything I can to fight this illness yet it is still there!

[DavidJ85]

Wow Shaz completely get this!

Not only that I get scared of the world if that makes sense. Like I look at people as if they're a different species and it's so surreal how life is. I get panicy and anxious thinking about it.

Do you get that?

[mininikki]

I can relate but in a different way(I think!)
My problem is that I was born female but have always felt as though I'm in the wrong body, I have always felt I should be male but I don't want to go down the sex change route as I just can't see myself coping with it.
I have been lucky in the fact that most of the people I know have accepted me for me mainly due to the fact, I think, that I am honest about the way I feel.
I have no problems explaining my situation to people but I still don't think I have fully accepted myself!

Anywho, not sure if this is what you meant when you posted this but thought I'd tell you where I'm at!

Nikki :)

[mr badger]

here's an off confession, which might help shed a little light.

Ever since I can remember, I was surprised by my face in the mirror, I used to say that that was not my face, mine looked different.

In later life, I became a Buddhist and the idea od rebirth gave me a little insight into this.

Funnily enough, I'm quite happy with my actual face these days.

So - no you're not alone in having 'odd' views about how you fit together.