I need someone to tell me I'm being silly.

[turtleonaleash]

Hi all,

I haven't spent the night away from my home in 9 years.

1 year ago I became afraid to leave my house period. I've been working really hard all year and now my boyfriend and I want to go away on a short trip. I really want to go and my psychiatrist thinks it's a great idea, but now my health anxiety is rearing it's ugly head.

I'm afraid to get on two planes (2 there and 2 back so 4 planes.) And I am also afraid that when I'm on the plane or when I get to Portland my appendix will burst and I'll have to have emergency surgery (I'm terrified of surgery, anesthesia to be exact, because I'm terrified of sleeping.)

I have IBS and every single twinge of pain I get in my stomach I immediatly think it's my appendix (even though I know appendicitis is a constant pain, not a crampy intermittent pain.)

I really want to do this, I want to prove to myself I can, I want to have a normal life. I just can't get these catastrophic thoughts out of my head.

Help!

[Geoff2301]

Doesn't sound like a very short trip to me when you need 2 planes to get there!! Wouldn't it be a lot more sensible to start off with a trip a couple of hours drive away or something like that? Remember.... build up slowly.....

[Vanilla Sky]

What are the chances that you could correctly predict that your appendix will burst ? There is no way that you can ! And why would it happen when you are away from home ? Because it is your anxiety scaring you into staying safe at home , but we are never safe from the horrible catastrophic thoughts wether we are at home or not !
You know the pains are IBS , it's such a common thing with stress and anxiety, so many people have it and so many people manage it !
Defy the anxiety , go for the trip , and i can tell you when you get home again , you will be so happy you did it and it will help you in the long run . Your psychiatrist thinks its ok and you will be with your boyfriend.
You will have a normal life if you stop listening to the bad thoughts because thats all it is ... just thoughts
Go and have a wonderful time , come back and tell us you did it !!

Paige xx

P.S Stop being silly !! :winks:

[gaaron]

Hi turtleonaleash (love the monika)

I can't help you re the fear of being away from home etc.
But I can tell you you're not silly. You're aware you have a problem and you're getting help - that's the beginnings of facing up to your fear!And sometimes that step is actually the hardest.
I'm sure they'll be plenty others on this site that will be able to offer support and guidance. I know there's stuff you can click on to the left of the post for advice.
But there's Strictly come Dancing/XFactor/Celebrity results on tv - could be some of them are watching at the moment. :hugs::flowers:

have to edit -whilst typing 2 people replied and one said stop being silly! oops

[turtleonaleash]

Doesn't sound like a very short trip to me when you need 2 planes to get there!! Wouldn't it be a lot more sensible to start off with a trip a couple of hours drive away or something like that? Remember.... build up slowly.....

The trip is actually fairly short. The first flight is only 40 minutes and the second one is only an hour. My brother is opening a restaurant and my boyfriend and I want to go for the grand opening :). I just haven't been on a plane in 5 years or more and when I've never flown without my mom (my mom is a huge crutch for me... I always depend on her to keep me safe but I know it's not good.)

Thank you for your advice :hugs:

[turtleonaleash]

Thank you everyone :). I know it's just my anxiety rearing it's ugly head. I know that there is a very good chance of me going away and being totally fine and healthy and most importantly having FUN! It's been a long time since I had fun. I know it's kind of a situation where I need to bite the bullet and just go, but I'm so afraid once I get there I'll freak out and no be able to get home fast enough. Sigh.

Thank you again everyone. I appreciate you taking the time to answer :). :hugs: