breast cancer worries again

[constantworrier418]

I've been on here alot over the last few weeks, I really feel my concerns over lumps in my breasts are getting worse. I've got to the stage were I know I just cannot avoid all contact with my boobs - I have to check them and amongst other things trying to avoid touching your boobs when dressing is so difficult.

I had a panicky moment earlier and I did my usual and pestered my Mum to check for me but as is getting more and more the case I am convincing myself she is not checking thoroughly enough so I ended up having a feel, except now I just can't believe myself - I'm sure I felt something yet when I went to the same area again I couldn't feel it - I'm so stressed about it I just don't know what to do with myself. I'm on the waiting list for CBT but mny reliance on other family members to reassure me getting out of hand and I'm feeling so fed up - If my worst fears don't come true (that I'll die of cancer within a year) I could have another 30 years or so of fearing this and I don't want to wake up every morning thinking what was I worrying about before I went to bed :weep:

[joannap]

i do know that the recommended treatment for overcoming fear like this is for your family members to refuse to check you/reassure you all the time - that you need to deal with the feelings of anxiety because after all - it is not your fear of lumps that it is the problem - it is the anxiety that is causing you to fixate on this (for others it is fear of germs/bad things happening etc) and so this is how your anxiety is particuarly affecting you.

why not say to your mum - check me once a day and then for the rest of the day - if i try to talk about it - remind me that i am allowed one period a day to check/worry and then for the rest of the day i have to work on accepting the fear and seeing it through to the other side. anxiety only gets out of control when we do not deal with it in the right way - think of it this way - of the checking/reassuring was working - you would not be stuck in this cycle.

this is how i overcame my ocd thoughts - i would let them be there but i would not interact with them and when the fear rose - i focused on accepting the fear and then when the fear died down i could see the thoughts for what they were - not worth spending my time on!

would it also help for you to have a mammogram to put your mind at rest?

the thing is - none of us can 100% guarantee that we will be here in 12 months time (although it is extremely likely we will be!) and so part of accepting and overcoming health anxiety is learning to deal with the fact that we can never be 100% reassured/certain. my mum always says its the things we don't worry about that happen so do not avoid touching your boobs when dressing etc - this is just reinforcing your fear and it is the fear you need to work on because when you get the fear under control - your worries about lumps will naturally recede. x

[amandy1979]

i too have this exact same problem, so i can understand,

[Mogwog]

Hi

I have this problem too. I have naturally lumpy breasts and get myself into a flap when checking - I am under the care of a consultant as I suffer from breast cysts etc and am going back in 6 months just for a check up - I cant even feel the cysts they are so small!

My consultant couldn't stress enough that random checking is the worst thing you can possibly do because from day to day your breasts change. I would check mine every 5 mins and even sneak off to do so and was always finding new things. My Dr said the best time to check is around 3-5 days after your period has finished - breasts are less lumpy then. Also to put your hand of the side you are checking behind your head as this streches out the breast tissue making it easier to feel for things. He also said that you are looking for anything that stands out as different from the rest of the tissue. I got in a panic and asked him if I would know whether I was feeling a lump or normal breast tissue and he said you would definatley know.

I broke the cycle by coming on here eveytime I felt I needed to check and I haven't checked for about 3 weeks so far - I will need to check next week though as it is coming u to that time of the month:yesyes:

PM if you like - I ahve so much experience with breast lumps and worrying and checking its unbelievable!

:bighug1:

L.xxxx