need advice, questioning the anxiety all over again

[becks xxx]

Me again! Just something really quick.. The past few months i think i finally accepted that what i had was anxiety and wasn't nothing else like a mental illness etc.. Every month the week before my period, i thought i noticed an increase in my anxiety. I seemed to be more anxious in general, had a dull feeling in my head, constant thoughts like "i can't do this anymore" "its too hard" .. And it was always the week i never really left home as it just seemed not manageable. Anyway this month i never got it the week before so thought 'the week before thing' had gone (i put that bit down to pms by the way) .. But now, the week im on my period , i seem to have the feeling where everythings increased and im not able to push myself. How can this be normal? Around the same time every month i get a bad week?? It doesn't make sense.. Now im beginning to question all over again if it is anxiety :( anyone know if this is normal?

[ems43]

Hi becs, I'm in the same boat, i struggle/ struggled to accept it was all anxiety and instead was early signs of schizophrenia. I also feel worse before/ during my period. Sometimes it will be a few days before, other times it will be whilst on my period. My GP told me this is very common, which makes sense really as even people without anxiety/ depression can feel bad with PMT ( I have a friend that can do nothign by cry for 3 days a mont) but i guess with us it just makes us feel even worse. What are you afraid it could be if not anxiety, and what would lead you to think that due to it being on a different week? xx

[becks xxx]

Ah i've been there with the whole 'early signs of schitzophrenia' thing too!! It's horrible, you feel so sure that you have got it and so alone that noone seems to feel what u do and can still tell u it's just anxiety! The situation is horrible!! Well this is my 3rd bad day this week, and yesterday i was just thinking about everything and i did think that lately from what i can remember i haven't really thought "what if it's something else", like i finally accepted it was anxiety? But as soon as i realised i had accepted i got all the thoughts again of "oh what if i have a brain tumour" "something serious?" Bla bla bla... And because i just feel so blank/foggy and really see no way out at the moment, im not even fighting the thoughts back like ive been trying to do.

I think a lot of my problem at the mo is pressure to attend school. And pressure when im there to be able to stay in the lessons, im in my last year thangod and struggle with getting myself to school, fighting myself every morning so im not sick .. Some days i don't attend. And when i do, i am allowed out of lessons if need be, but the whole having to ask the teacher if im allowed out, i find so embarassing and having to just walk out. When i do go out i feel like im being such a nuisance to the teachers i have to go to, im sure they've gotta better things to do than listen to me every few hours saying i can't do nomore. And i also feel pushed back at the mo, from 2 comments a teacher has recently made to me.

I couldn't bring myself to attend all of my exams a few weeks back, i only done a few, so the other week my teacher goes "so why did u do the second maths paper but not the first?" So i said i couldn't make it.. And his response was "yeah i bet, more like you just couldn't be bothered" .. It's really playing on my mind, as im trying my hardest but he can't even appreciate it? So i think why should i bother.. Then the other day, i sat out of his lesson as i just couldn't face a few lessons that day, he saw me later on and said "bunk my lesson did ya?" I said, no i was busy..do u have our test results back? He said, well if you ever decide to turn up to my lesson you might find out. I don't know if im just being silly and making something out of nothing? But his comments are bugging me.. Sorry for talking loads ha!xx

[ems43]

oh Bec, what an arse he sounds! Some people just do not get it, they are too small minded to even imagine how it feels to be anyone but them. And particularly bad as he is a teacher and should be supporting you. Could you report him to anyone, like your form tutor. It really isn't acceptable to treat you like that when like you said you are clearly fighting to get through the day. Well it sounds like you have been doing well, and a small blip is only that, i think the trap we all often get caught in is beginning to question why do i feel bad today and not yesterday etc? Then we start to become more introcpetive and notice changes in our mood/ anxiety more easily. The thing that I am tryig to do now is go with the flow, accept I'm anxious and am overcomign an illness, and I'm going to have some good days/ bad days without the need to question why. I just read a book called at last a life by a guy who overcame his anxiety and it has really shifted the way I am thinking, so rather than trying not to be anxious, I'm trying ot accept I'm anxious for the time being and it won't last forever. God I'm startign to sound like a sales woman! Anyway, take care of yourself, remember that you are doing fantastic still going ot school whilst coping with all this anxiety, and try to ignore the stupid teacher!!x

[becks xxx]

Yeah i could! Suppose i will just see how he goes.. If he comes out with anymore nasty comments! Oh my god, at last a life is amazing!!!!! I got it some time last year and really does help you, when im feeling a bit down i always turn back to Paul's book. I'm glad it's helping you too :) it's true what he says! We have to give up the fight and go about our day however we feel.. Easier said than done but if he can, we can! Good luck. X x