Don't want to be like this anymore :(

[Jamie C]

Hey guys (and girls)

My first post on here be kind (this might be wrong section but its a bit of everything so i'll dump it here):)

Right anyway, past few weeks i have noticed my anxiety take a turn for the worse, i've had it for a few years and its been under control in the sence that the only effect i've had from it was the sence of derealisation and the odd chest pain but anyway couple of weeks ago i noticed the pains in my chest getting worse and as you could imagen i was pretty concerned by it, making things worse, i then got a viral infection in my glands and sinus's anyway, i done the worst think ever, i consulted the big "G" on the amazing invention called the internet at 4am one morning, and i litteral freaked out at the results of doom (i'm sposed to be a tough guy?! well sort of ha) anyway i saw a Dr (not my normal one tho) and she comfirmed it was a viral infection, anyway later that day i noticed a lump in the back of my throat, and after another visit with Dr "G" i was mentally broken again, altho some good came of it, i found this forum and reading some of the threads it feels comforting to not be alone in this problem, however... i then find myself getting a tight throat, and i break out Dr "G" for a third time that week and yes more shock and horror, after digging a little deeper into this forum i decided the best thing for me was to stop searching "G" and i haven't searched it in 4 days, noticed a big change in my behavoir, its been alot more positive.

But i still get all these aches, pains, bad thoughts and thinking i'm dying etc, and i want it to stop cos i'm at the end of my rag with it all (and i want a full decent live with no worries) is this really normal for an 18 year old? I mean the recent goings on within my family (including a terminally ill Nan with the dreaded C :weep:) and the unemployment (jobless scum!) i guess have taken its toll but i thought i could deal with it.

I just want it to stop, when i feel like this with all the pains etc , i loose all motivation etc, i dont go out and my mind makes me think everyone hates me or is taking piss out of me (i am overweight) and i can't shift that weight off cos i have no get up and go, i feel tired all the time and i'm short on breath (and i've never had that before even with the all the "lard" lol) only time i go out is to sign on and to go Banger racing (my intrest for the weekends:D) and i used to be estatic about it, now recently the anxiety seems to just put me off of going cos that where my mates are and they think i'm just a miserable boring old bum (and i only have a few of them and they live miles away so racing is the time when we can meet up) i want to live a good life, a normal life, but i just can't seem to get myself away from the nasty thoughts and inpending doom that goes on in my head, i simply worry to much and things keep getting worse, i dont want to be miserable over Xmas cos its most likely the last Xmas my Nan is going to get so i want it to be a good one for her.

Of course the inpending doom thoughts haven't been helped one bit by the Googling i have done in the past, but now thats stopped i hope it gets better, but i aint so sure. I only have a few goals in life, and one of the big ones is to race a banger for myself, but i don't feel i could do that at the moment, and the chest pains worry me too when regarding racing myself.

So any advice, tips, stories, rants, essays and pointers that could help me escape the pains and doom? And anyone else in a similar state as me? Be nice hearing from people the same as me.

Cheers Jamie C!

P.S: it also feels better to get that out of my head aswell to stop it driving me mad, cos i haven't really told anyone!

P.P.S: Woah!!! Mega essay lol! :yahoo:

[shaggyowen]

hello bud its real common for teens to have anxiety im 19 so dw about it i lost all motavation a the doc said i was mildly depressed speak to him and he/she will know the best way to go about things how this helps dude

[Mogwog]

Hi Jamie

Welcome to to the forum. You'll get loads of advice and support on here, its always conforting to read that someone has the same symptoms as you.

Hugs

Laura.x

[haziefantasie]

Hi jamie

Just to let you know you are not alone in how you are feeling, your symptoms sound very familiar to me especially loss of motivation and feeling as tho you should be able to cope but cant. Did you discuss these feelings with your doctor? It is normal to feel like this to a degree at your age but when it stops you enjoying things you normally do it may time to get some help. In relation to you being overweight and having no motivation to do anything about it, a few of us have agreed to help eachother get healthy in the new year. If this sounds like something you want to get involved in have a look at my posts or send me a private message and we can help eachother out x

[Jamie C]

Hey guys

Todays been an up and down day, was feeling abit better this morning, but now feeling pretty bad again, lots of bad thoughts about bad illnesses and dying and pains etc, starting to freak out abit and cue the chest pains :(
Must get myself a dr's appointment for this week. However, there has been no appointments with Dr Google today, even tho theres a strong urge to get googling! :wacko:

@shaggyowen
Alright mate, its nice to know i'm not the only teen suffering, i will get a Dr's appointment for sometime this week, just hope he don't think i'm waffling on when i start telling him whats up lol, hope your feeling somewhat better now mate.:smile:

@Mogwog
Hey Laura, Thanks! look forward to discovering how to beat this anxiety, it really is comforting to know that people are in the same boat as you, don't feel so alone then, thanks for the virtual hug! (i'll give you one back :laugh: never done it before) *Hugs* :hugs::smile: x

@haziefantasie
Hey, its really nice to know we're (we're = sufferers) not alone, i will be sorting a Dr's appointment this week to have a chat with him and to try and sort things out, i do feel i have left it abit late tho (my fault) but i spose i got abit to big for my boots thinking i could handle it, but we all make mistakes in life, yes! lossing weight would be a good thing, i will check out your posts, thanks :smile: x

Anyone else in the same boat, or any more tips and pointers, all ideas are appreciated :smile:

Cheers Jamie C!

[Skin'eadWesty]

I've been getting ticked off at my weight an all, It seems I'm not excercising nearly enough or even allowing myself to get pumped up for some back of the mind fear of setting me heart racing. Daft I know, exercise being good for ye olde ticker and all, but its the 'doom thoughts' that get me too. The motivation thing sounds just like me, I hardly have the will to live, and I was scrapping in pubs and screaming bloody nora in me punk band 3 months ago! My mates think I've 'grown up' and I dont have the patience to explain to em half the time. Luckily me bird is pretty understanding, she sticks by me even if it does seem to me like I've become a complete bore. The day I yell another anti political load of trash to the sound of distorted guitars and drumming tin cans I'll know im back on form! ;]

[Jamie C]

Alright!

Another up and down day again i spose, pains in my neck and lower jaw have been doing my nut all day, and i'm still getting the tightness and lump in my throat which is starting to worry me, been having some pains just randomly dotted around all over my head and it feels kinda tender to touch aswell, been feeling pretty tired aswell, but i didn't get much sleep so thats the cause even so, cue the mind running wild as to what it could be.
On the plus side i've made a Dr's appointment but its for next monday, which was the only slot available, and no googling either :) altho theres been a strong urge to get searching i've managed to stop myself from doing so, didn't relise how hard it would be to just stop searching, bit like giving up smoking i spose, sometime i feel like my mind is making pains up just so i start searching, find it sad how we crave more of the shock from the results to be honest even tho we can't help it.

@Skin'eadWesty
I'm the same, hardly any exercise and its a big blow for self confidence aswell, the doom thoughts really do scare me and i find it hard to concentrate on what i was doing before i had the doom thoughts, been a better day for me today with the chest pains tho so thats good, i have mates the same, some of them understand, the rest just think i'm being a pathetic attention seeker, but they won't know the pain and fear of it till they've experianced it tho.

Cheers Jamie C

P.S what you guys and girls think of the daily update? is it ok or a bit annoying haha! perhaps i should start a blog :sign20:

[sweet juicy]

Xmas is coming soon!

[Jamie C]

Hey guys

Another lil update for you all, been feeling somewhat better over the past couple of days mentally, less worrying about things , altho i still worry from time to time, it appers we're (my family) are going to be spending Christmas split up because nan needs looking after over the xmas period, so me and bro will be staying at home with our uncle and auntie while mum and dad go up to nans, which seems to have lowered everyones morale because we were hoping she would be well enough to come down for the holidays.

Been coughing up lots of phlegm over past few weeks from the virus infection i had, but strangely never had a sore throat, it has been tickling abit but thats it, but it feels like there something in my throat that i can't cough up and i havent a clue what it is? (any ideas) I accidentally smacked myself in the nose today (don't ask how!) and it caused a nose bleed, obviously i had some of the blood run down the back of my throat and since then i've had this soreness there, well i say soreness, its more of stinging when i swallow (any ideas on this too?) apart from that a fair few of my symptoms have gone away, apart from the shivers and sickness feel i had earlier which i presume was caused by said virus infection or intigestion, other than that, just the usual aches and pains, nothing to much to worry about really, had a fun day playing (i'm 18 but i will never grow up mentally :P) out in the snow, its not that common down in devon lol!

I'll be seeing the Dr on monday and hopefully everything can be sorted so i can enjoy the most out of christmas, i will most likely post when i get back (or sometime that evening) about what happened, hope your all keeping well and keep those comments, suggestions, tips and stories (and any troubles you may have similar to mine) coming, always good to read about fellow sufferers meaning we can help eachother out :)

Cheers Jamie C

[looking4answers]

Wouldn't it be nice if we could all just say to hell with it.. and stop worrying about any of it and say "whatever" lol.. Merry Christmas to you .Michael

[Jamie C]

Hey

Well i'm worried and proper ticked off! mega snow storms meant my dr couldn't get into the surgery today and after going on a mega mission to clear the driveway of 2 ft of snow i was less than pleased to be phoned up and told, fair enough he can't help it but the problem is hes a popular doctor so hes usually very busy, i'm unlikely to get another appointment untill after xmas, if not new year now! i dont want to see another doctor cos they don't usually understand you aswell as your normal one, and i feel more comfortable telling him stuff etc etc, so anyway i'm really worried and all the nasty thoughts have kicked in again its really bad and i found myself on google for 5 mins earlier... damn it :frown: ahh i wish live could be simple!

@looking4answers (http://www.nomorepanic.co.uk/member.php?u=3037)
Yes it would! i used to be like that, used to be able to brush problems off without even giving a second thought, i have a really bad cold at the moment and back then it used to be just a "cold" now it seems like torture.

Hope you all have a good christmas and a happy new year.

Hopefully i can get a docotrs appointment sorted for this week but i highly doubt it.

Cheers Jamie C

[Jamie C]

Hey guys

Been a while since i updated

Finally seen my dr and he said that my anxiety was causing most of my problems and that i have a chesty infection so hes prescribed some medicene. Other than that tho he said i'm fine! He also told me off for looking up rubbish on google, this is the first time in weeks i've felt pretty good (appart from the chest infection) which is great. I mean the ongoing problems are still happening etc but i've also noticed now the new racing season is upon us (bangers) i've been taking a massive boost in intrest into it and now i'm as keen to go and watch as ever which is also great:D. Only problem i have now is i can't swallow tablets easily!:doh:

Hope everyones keeping ok

Cheers Jamie C