Just been screamed at by a practise nurse. So embarrassed!

[harasgenster]

I've had a hell of a morning. I woke up feeling fine, went to make my breakfast and started feeling faint and sick. That happens to me all the time so I just carried on as usual until I realised if I didn't lie down there'd be a chance I'd fall so I got down to the floor and then I couldn't get back up!

I usually just wait til the blood gets back to my head then carry on but everytime I tried to do that I felt like I was going to black out so I went to the bathroom and tried to sort myself out. But then I started to get these cramping pains in my stomach. They just felt like period pain and I came on this morning so I just thought "Oh, it's that, I'll wait for it to pass" but then it just kept getting worse and I was finding it more difficult to sit up and had to get on the bathroom floor.

Then it occurred to me I was locked in a bathroom feeling like I was on the verge of blacking out. I got pretty worried about that so I managed to reach up and unlock the door then dragged myself into the hall and made as much noise as I could to wake my friends up. When they came through I explained I just needed sugar and painkillers and I should be fine. I'm a very fainty person so I'm used to this. But then it just kept getting worse. I was sweating a lot and shaking and the pain in my abdomen increased until it was the worst pain I'd ever felt. I've had a coil in before and this was 100 times worse than getting metal shoved in my womb! My friends really started to worry because I was in too much pain to speak and I've had loads of problems around my pelvis/bladder recently (since my coil went wrong!) so they called NHS direct, who told them to call the GP, who told them to call this emergency number, who told them to call an ambulance.

By the time the paramedics came I was feeling just like I had normal period pain so I told them I was fine and thank you for their help, but they told me my BP was low and because the pain had been so bad they had to take me in. I said that was fine and went in with them. When we got there my BP was still low but I didn't feel too bad and the pain had nearly gone. Then I had to see this practice nurse. I told her the story and as soon as I got to "ambulance" she just blew up. She kept telling me I had wasted hospital resources and they're overstretched as it is. I felt cpmpletely humiliated and really, really guilty. I tried to tell her that I had never asked for an ambulance and my friends had only followed instructions, so she said I should have turned the ambulance away. When I told her that I had told the paramedics I was fine and they said I had to go to hospital anyway she refused to believe me!

I just burst into tears and ran out of the hospital. Everybody keeps saying I need to see a doc to get checked out but I'm really worried about going now. I've never had pain that bad but that doesn't mean it wasn't just very, very bad period pain and I don't want to waste anyone else's time. At the same time, my friends are really adament that I go to a GP and if I refuse I feel like they're going to frog march me down there!

I feel like a complete idiot! I really don't want to see any more docs. It was probably just a bit of period pain and I've been a total wimp and I think I freaked out because I've had problems with my bladder all year and the pain I get from that often feels like period pain so when it got severe I started to get scared there was something wrong with my bladder.

I just don't know how to feel about this. I feel really bad about wasting hospital resources in the ice and snow and I'm really embarrassed. I can't decide if I've got a case here at all to feel angry! Is she allowed to say that without first checking me over? No one's checked me yet apart from the paramedics.

[JaneC]

Am I allowed to use the word b!tch on here? because that's what she was! get checked out by your GP as your friends suggest and try to forget about her - although I'd mention to your GP what happened. Totally out of order. Try not to let it cause you lasting upset, however :hugs:

[PoppyC]

I am really shocked, you received such awful treatment off the excuse for a nurse.:mad: Poor You!!! You should not have to be spoken to like she did. Seriously you need to make a complaint about how you have been treated. No way should you have been made to feel like you do. You had every right to be seen to and an ambulance to be called. Its tough if resources are stretched, thats not your fault, and you deserve to be taken in by ambulance if the ambulance crew suggested it.
If the nurse was having a bad day, then it is not you who should have to deal with that, nor be made to listen to her stupid opinions.
I would make a complaint immediately to the hospital.
I hope you soon feel better.:flowers: Its bad enough feeling ill, without being made to feel bad about it.

[gypsywomen]

no nurse or doctor should shout at anyone its disgusting you should report her ,,and also go to see your gp to get checked out :)

[Joexgee]

thats terrible :ohmy: is that not their job? i hope you feel a little better now but i would go and explain to your gp like eveyone said :hugs:xx

[Ambers]

I am so sorry to hear that. I had a similar thing happen to me years ago and it really knocks your confidence. Everyone is different and feels pain differently, I am like you as I faint very easily (low blood pressure) so I can completely understand how you felt - passing out is really scary even without pain. Please go see your GP and ignore this woman - she was probably having a bad day herself. Hope you feel better soon xx

[harasgenster]

Thank you everybody. I'm not sure about going to the docs yet. I thought I might wait and see what happens. At the moment I just feel woozy and a little sore but there's nothing terrible happening so I'll see if it gets worse and go to a doc if it does. It could be a one off, in which case there's not much they can do.

I'm glad everybody else thinks the nurse was in the wrong, though. I thought she might be but I kept thinking about it and then the situation just seemed to get less and less clear!

I think I might have low blood pressure, anyway. Like Ambers I get faint a lot. If I don't eat on time I get faint and that's not my blood sugar apparently, it's a vegal nerve reaction which has something to do with my blood pressure. I've also gone into shock everytime my cervix has had to be stretched for any reason. :/ I was told to never get a coil or anything again because of the vegal nerve reaction, so I guess I'm prone to this stuff. :(

[LucyR]

Hi, No, thats awful treatment to have to endure and its not as if you yourself demanded the ambulance. These people are a disgrace to their profession and a help to none!

[sb001f8994]

How awful for you. Im with the others here, you must see your gp and Id really think about reporting that nurse. Who has the right to say whether you do or dont need an amubulance, you clearly did as the ambulance staff would not have taken you to hospital if you didnt need to be checked out.
Take care

[debs71]

I would make an official written complaint to the hospital Chief Executive directly hun. This nurse's behaviour was BANG OUT OF ORDER and completely unprofessional, but sadly I will tell you this is VERY COMMON IN A&E which is the exact reason I resigned from that department last year.

The nurses/staff there are a law unto themselves. They are up to their eyes in heavy workload most of the time, and they end up taking it out on the patients, when it is nothing to do with the patient, but more to do with their own frustration at lack of staff and lack of resources. They also have to work to strict deadlines (patients seen, treated and moved on within 4 hours) and so the amount of TLC they actually give people is seriously lacking. I actually had arguments with my manager about this and when I resigned left a strongly worded letter for her as I had been bullied by other senior staff there for being 'slow' when working and 'spending too much time' on patients. Well I would not compromise on that if people needed whatever time they did from me, and I had seen slapdash care from other nurses, so I decided I wanted nothing more to do with A&E.

Don't let this COW upset you. So much for the caring profession eh? But again, I would complain to the hospital executive or even better PALS which is the Patient Advocate Liason Service who take complaints about services and follow them up. They are VERY GOOD too.

Lots of Love.xxxx:hugs:

[Del1970]

What a terrible experience for you, you should have taken the nurses name and got her reported, allthough at the time I bet you was too distraught, just because she has had a bad/busy day does'nt mean its to be taken out on you if thats how she gets she is obviously in the wrong job!, like you say - your friends where only following instructions from medical people, they did the right thing, I'd go and see your GP if it was them that suggested the ambulance and explain what happened.

Hope your feeling well soon and please don't let that b!tch of a nurse get to you!

Del
x

[harasgenster]

Thanks. I had a feeling it could have been to do with the stress on the hospitals at the moment. It's going to be worse for them in the current weather conditions. It's just really difficult to know, I think, if you've got a friend in pain, who you should call.

I think my friends did exactly right. They called NHS Direct first then tried to get hold of my GP. All of us thought my GP would have been the best person to see me but when they realised they weren't going to be able to get anyone out at 07:30 am they just went for the only option that would mean I'd get seen.

I don't think we did anything out of order. I do still feel like it's a bit my fault. There's a part of me saying maybe the pain wasn't bad enough and I'm just so rubbish with pain I was making a fuss that would only be warranted by much more severe pain. I don't know, I just feel like I've made everyone worry and maybe there's actually no reason. Maybe I just have such a low pain threshold that I couldn't take it. I suppose it's so subjective there's no way of comparing. I am quite bad with pain in that area. I've had all sorts pierced and tattooed and I'm fine with that but as soon as it's my womb/bladder I can't stand it! I'm terrible in gyny examinations!

[pd]

I think you and your friends did exactly the right thing. The hospitals may be under a lot of stress at the moment but that's absolutely no excuse to treat a patient like that.

I'd try and track down the name of the nurse who 'treated' you (the A&E department should have a record of it somewhere) and make an official complaint. She shouldn't be allowed to get away with that.

[harasgenster]

As a side note, I was just thinking about this and wondered if anybody else thought docs can be more sceptical when it's a "woman's problem"? Part of the reason I'm so wimpy with gyny examinations is because of all the problems I've had in the past. I've had docs be incredibly insensitive when my blood pressure fell so low I went into shock and others that made fun of me for flinching during swabs when there actually was something wrong with me and it felt like they were touching an organ or something it was so sensitive! One of my friends who is extremely angry about all of this has had the same thing when she was in agony FOR A YEAR with a gyny problem and was fobbed off until she became so exhausted and depressed with it all she ended up having a minor breakdown and having to leave her job.

Oh, it's not fair! Not everything women get is stupid!

(Thanks for reading my rant, haha).

[debs71]

I think that is very true harasgenster....

Despite the seemingly modern times we live in, there are still - IMO - some times it is far preferable to see a female doctor than an insensitive idiot of a male doctor.

I had a transvaginal scan earlier this year and found the female radiologist very sensitive to my period problems and history of bleeding, and I don't doubt for a second it would have been different with a male doctor.....how can they grasp that after all?

Also, DON'T FEEL GUILTY ABOUT YOUR PAIN AT ALL!!!!!

Pain is purely subjective, and we all feel it in different ways, to different degrees and have different tolerances to it, and it is not for anyone else to say that the pain you are feeling is not bad enough or valid....the fact is, that is how YOU view it, so they should bloody help you, not have a go at you!

Put this bad experience out of your mind hun and forget the insensitive troll you saw!xxxx

[harasgenster]

Thank you Debs,
That really makes me feel better. Under pressure from my friends I've called my GP's office and they're going to decide if I should be seen today. They're really good and very sensitive there so I trust them with the decision. I've just read a bit about period pain and feel a bit better having read similar stories to mine where low blood pressure and extreme pain combine and can be debilitating so I don't feel so guilty now. I've had various problems with my period for the last year that have ended with me falling on stairs/being unable to stand etc. so I'm going to ask my doc to suggest a contraceptive that will stop my periods anyway. That should do the trick!

Thanks :) :) :)

[pd]

I agree with you about the way some doctors view 'women's problems' - for two years before I changed doctors and was diagnosed with endometriosis, I had a doctor telling me it was all in my mind and there was nothing wrong with me.

[harasgenster]

I agree with you about the way some doctors view 'women's problems' - for two years before I changed doctors and was diagnosed with endometriosis, I had a doctor telling me it was all in my mind and there was nothing wrong with me.

That's ridiculous! You'd think they'd check for things like endometriosis/fibroids etc before they told you it was in your mind!

[Anxious_gal]

Don't take it personally.
The nurse obviously was over stretched, over worked and tired and grumpy and she took it out on some one that wasn't feeling well.
I've met some nasty nurses and doctors in my time, Always wish after wards I stood for my self, but we do have a habit of assuming people in the medical profession are always right lol.
you had such an awful day :-( sorry about what happened x

[LyndaB]

You go and see your GP about yourself, and complain about this nurse to her line manager. I don't normally go in for grassing people up but her attitude was soooooo unprofessional. If she has problems she needs to sort them out, maybe working in A&E is not the right job for her but that is not your problem. You were a patient in need, she let you down.

[magic girl]

i think this nurse should be reported if you had spoken to a member of staff like that you would have been thrown out,they have posters up saying they wont tollerate abuse towards staff its a shame they don't practice what they preach and i think most people have come accross stroppy nurses and doctors i did when i was in labour with my son and you don't need it when your in pain and worried and them using the excuse that they are stressed and short staffed isnt a good enough excuse and i can say that as my mum is a nurse and she hates hearing about stroppy nurses she says they should'nt be in the job if they treat ill people like that its not on.
magic girl xxx

[debs71]

my mum is a nurse and she hates hearing about stroppy nurses she says they should'nt be in the job if they treat ill people like that its not on.

I completely agree with her.

I was appalled by the way some nurses I worked with in A&E spoke to patients and other members of the public. They lacked any form of patience and took it out on people just because they were stressed which isn't acceptable.

After all, if you can't stand the heat, get out of the kitchen, which is exactly what I did.

Some of them need to go back to Uni to learn communication skills.:curse:

[shorty1969]

Had a similar experience when paramedics where called to me once , when the words anxiety and panic where mentioned , he shook his head and raised his eyes to the ceiling :mad: , I didnt even call them out , it was the doctor . Some people could benefit from a wee taste of what we go through sometimes , that would change there attitude ..

[LyndaB]

Too right!

[WillyB]

This is very shocking, what a cruel woman. Try not to feel bad about it, i know how down and embarrassed you can feel after a telling off, but in your case for a reason that you pretty much had no control over.

Take care :)

[JJ76]

Please please report her. If the ambulance staff didnt think you warranted an ambulance then THEY can turn you away ok so they rarely do- but they can do hope your better soon!

[debs71]

Please please report her. If the ambulance staff didnt think you warranted an ambulance then THEY can turn you away ok so they rarely do- but they can do hope your better soon!

JJ76, They can't actually turn you away I'm afraid.

What they CAN do is check you over there and then in your home/the ambulance depending on your medical complaint, and if they do not see a need for you to go to hospital strongly ADVISE you of that fact, but at the end of the day, they have to give you the option of being checked out at the hospital.

This is why they get their knickers in a knot about what they view as trivialities, because - not including harasgenster of course - THERE ARE a hell of a lot of people who very needlessly call for ambulances instead of thinking rationally whether or not it is a real emergency.