Pure O OCD or something more?

[Sonny Moonlight]

Hello.

In the past, I've suffered from severe panic attacks and it left me unable to eat and live a normal life, and eventually I was hospitalized due to my weight loss. Since then I've been progressing, but am still on bedrest.

It seems as if my panic disorder has developed into Pure 'O' OCD. I was panicking one night having the bizarre thought of being somewhere I wasn't and I reassured myself that I wasn't crazy and I'm obviously where I know I am, and that I'd be 'crazy' if I was thinking about aliens or something.

So I began thinking about aliens (irrational, I know.) a couple days later and I suddenly began to panic thinking I was going insane or crazy or developing delusions. I kept having this irrational thought that people around me were aliens, that they've planted my memory, etc. etc. and I knew these thoughts are really far out there but I couldn't disprove them, which made me panic even more. I dwelled on it for nearly a week and it feels like it's becoming true (I know it isn't), the thoughts are so persistent and I just cannot disprove them because my imagination always finds a way to throw me back into uncertainty, which makes me scared that I may actually believe this one day.

I'm also mildly depressed from being on bed rest for 7 weeks, constantly shaking due to anxiety.

The psychiatrist assured me it's Purely Obsessional OCD, but I really feel as if something more is wrong here.

[Rachel W]

I have OCD, and when someone with it is left with nothing to do but think about things, those things seem real. For example, most people on here have health anxiety and they think they have some illness. It is very unlikely that they have the illness but their fear makes it seems very likely, and they can't disprove it immediately without tests (which are scary because the person thinks it will prove it not disprove it because they have already convinced themselves that is is VERY likely that they have it).

Your fear is similar. The idea has been planted and you can't disprove it, but it is irrational to think this. The thing is, you know how irrational it is but can't let it go because your mind has made it feel real. It is part of OCD. Having irrational ideas or fears and knowing that it is stupid, but not able to let it go. The more you worry about the thoughts the more they will hold onto you. What you need to do is just relax (I know VERY difficult) and for perhaps 30 minutes a day, try to listen to music and think about other things (perhaps say to yourself, even if it was true it hasn't hurt me so far and so I can take this time away from the thoughts to enjoy something).

I hope you feel better soon.

Rachel