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Jules31
11-03-04, 17:53
I've been trying to be really calm and rational about the way I feel but today it has just gone completely out of control.

I've had the heaviness in my left leg and arm nearly all day to varying degrees and I've had a headache on and off. I also keep going really lightheaded as though I will pass out or collapse.

I started doing some research on migraines as the dr suggested I could be having these. But in the info I read, I also read about things like strokes, TIA's and aneurysms. So guess what I've scared myself silly that I have something like this.

Meg (no offence anyone else) you are probably the person to bring me back down to earth.

I started thinking TIA cos I had these feelings come on for the first time very suddenly last June. They lasted for about an afternoon. Can't remember if I had a headache with it but at the time was worried I'd had a stroke. Then after a few months I got the odd heavy sensation in my leg but only on the odd day. In the last month or so it has got more and more until it's everyday.As you know and I'm getting more irrational.

Meg you know I had an EEG in September, would any of these complaints have shown up on that at all or even if they had would it have been too long ago now

I just keep getting really scared because of the strange feelings in my head like I'm just going to keel over. I can't even talk to anyone at work, cos I can't concentrate and need to sit down all the time.

Right enough, I know I'm wallowing, need to be more positive.
Have CBT in an hour so hopefully that will help. Though last week I felt dreadful on the way there and was in such a state by the time I saw the therapist that she had to get me deep breathing for ages. I have never been so hot in my life. It must have lasted for about forty five minutes

Sorry for being such a pain, hope you all are ok

Jules

Meg
12-03-04, 09:11
Hi Jules,

So many things can present with so many problems and symptoms.
Migraines are one of these things.

TIA's also hav eother symptoms that you hav enever mentioned having at all. I know it's easy to keep trying to find something to explain all these symptoms but in fact they do get worse when you're stressed or worried - linking them to anxiety more.

You could take Omega 3's and Vit E which wil both help keep your blood a bit thinner and see if that helps at all. Aftre all a TIA is a clot that gets temporarily stuck. Why would you hav ethick bood or narrow vessels when really you're healthy.

Th ebit I'm not hearing is a deterioration or progression , just an increase in the frequency the frequency which when yuou're dwelling on it isn't suprising.




Meg

Watch your thoughts, they become your words...
Watch your words, they become your actions... Watch your actions, they become your habits... Watch your habits, they become your character... Watch your character, it becomes your destiny...

sadie
12-03-04, 21:26
Hi Jules,

If its any consolation I too have been plagued with horrible sensations like you over the last 3/4 weeks. I have been diagnosed with migraine last year due to reoccuring headaches on one side of my head, dizziness, nausea etc although I am going for an MRI scan next week to rule all other possibilities.

Anyway, over the last few weeks I have had terrible mouth tingling, numbness in my limbs, weakness, dizziness, nausea, weird sensations in my head and a horrible taste in my mouth which makes me feel really sick. I have thought all sorts of terrible things..like a stroke, brain tumour, anuyerism, epilepsy etc...

I am terrified that there is something seriously wrong with my brain..afterall I dont think that I should be getting migraines everyday. Everything I have read on migraine says that a migraine only lasts 3/4 days at the most and that aura symptoms only preceed the migraine but mine are here all day everyday. Plus I get aura mostly and usually without the headache and apparently, so I have read, this is not a good sign and usually one when there is some other cause to your headaches!!!! But what can it be????

I am trying so hard not to worry about it as I know it just makes matter worse but its so hard. Does anyone else feel like me? Does anyone know of a migraine site similar to this one where I can chat to others who experience similar symptoms as maybe that will put my mind at rest.

My migraines/headaches or whatever are really getting me down. I am trying just to live life normally but I just feel so 'ill' all the time.

Can anyone help?

sadie

Jules31
13-03-04, 17:25
Sadie

I too get all of the symptoms that you get and all of the time. Some days I only get the aura feeling and not much of a headache. I also keep getting blurred vision in the corner of one eye. Usually it't the left but occasionally the right. This morning I must have had it six times for a few seconds within an hour. It has really worried. I feel so dizzy and off balance and even as I type my left arm aches and feels stiff. I just keep feeling like i will pass out all the time. My head is killing at the moment. I fell asleep downstairs last night and woke up with a really bad headache and then my eyes started going hazy. I went to bed and the headache eased but has come on again today.

Let me know how you get on. I'm worried now that I should have an MRI. I've had blurred vision in my left eye months ago on and off but not as much as I have now. The dr at A and E looked in my eyes in february. Surely he would have seen if there was anything to worry about, such as a swollen optic nerve.

Nothing I take touches the headaches. I hate this so much
Julie

sadie
13-03-04, 19:57
Julie,

When the doctor looked in your eye they can pick up any serious things going on in your head, so they fact they didnt spot something is good news.

I think we both suffer from migraines as well as the anxiety. When you include all the ysmptoms of both...no wonder you and I feel so crapy most of the time. I just wish I new what was causing my migraines so i could do something positive about it. I do think my 'menstural' cycle has some part to play as well as stress. I get a lot of neck tension etc which I think causes a lot of problems. Oh and I think I crunch my teeth quite a bit during my sleep too!!!! no wonder I suffer headaches/migraines.

If you are really worried about your headaches/migraines you can ask your GP to investigate it further for you. Im going because I do seem to get migraines quite a bit..and when I was refered they were ruining my life due to the constant 'aura' symptoms.

What to remember Julie is that anxiety can cause blurred vision etc. I used to suffer this symptom terrribly when I first became anxious. It is also a symptom of migraine too!! My right gets quite blurry from time to time as my left eye is lazy and the right eye does most of the work..eventually it too becomes tired. When did you last get your eyes tested?

Today I woke up with a migraine, which passed after about 1 hour, then I got tingling in my mouth about I hour later and then that passed and at the moment so far, I feel ok. Lets hope I feel ok for the rest of this day.

Take care Julie and if you ever need to talk you know Im here and I understand.



sadie

kate
13-03-04, 22:10
Hiya Sadie and Julie,

I suffered from migraines from the age of 10 up until 16.

Mine used to start with the flashing lights and I then used to get the half vision.

This would then pass to be replaced with numbness which started in the left foot and worked its way all round the left side, over the top of my head and then down the right hand side of my body.

During this time, my mouth also used to go numb and I couldn't speak at all, which was very scary.

After the numbness passed, I then got the thumping headache and nausea which lasted usually for 3 days.

I used to get a migraine once or twice a month. Mine would also sometimes be triggered by flashing lights. The flash from a camera would be enough for one to start.

Although the full blown migraine ceased when I was 16, I also had several when I was pregnant which lead me to believe that they were hormone related.

I now just get the thumping headache from time to time without all the other symptoms. But I find that the headaches almost always occur when I'm very stressed or anxious.

So, try not to worry too much, I'm sure that all the symptoms are due to migraines with the added "bonus" of anxiety!!!

Take care both

Kate x

stimpy
13-03-04, 23:09
It is only natural you are going to think the worst case senario, it is what us panic sufferers do best.
Most of the symptoms we suffer with, the chest pains, aching limbs, shortness of breath, would normally mean we are dying of something terrible, so Mr Panic gives you these symptoms just to give you something else to worry about.

I hate the whole migraine thing. Used to be convinced I was having a stroke. Flashing lights, half vision, numb hands, numb face, can't talk, and a pain that is like someone driving a six inch nail through your head, If I was lucky I wouldn't through up.



Love, light and Best wishes
Liz xxx

[:p] Panic Monster & Scatty Eccentric

PinkLady
14-03-04, 01:19
this is what I have been going through for about a week now. headaches coming and going
neck pain, tightness in my shoulders. Blurred vision that is off and on. With and without
my glasses. When i get blurred i get slightly dizzy and then panic and feel like i am going to be sick. I have taken a lorazapan and got up and walked or kept busy and it does subside.
The only thing i think about is anorisism, blood clot and stroke. Our minds run in the fast lane.

Trina

Trina

sadie
14-03-04, 11:10
Hi Trina & Stimpy

Thanks for your replies, it helps to know that your not the only one that has felt like you and have lived through it ok!!

Hope your both well.

sadie

stimpy
15-03-04, 09:56
The neck pain, shoulder tightness and dizziness are all classic symptoms of anxiety. The blurred vision, now I've never heard of that one.
But then again Mr Panic does like to find new ways of making us worry about stuff.

Love, light and Best wishes
Liz xxx

[:p] Panic Monster & Scatty Eccentric

Jules31
15-03-04, 11:19
Hi Guys

I got the blurred vision in my left eye this morning and my arm and leg are aching. Since I got into work, they have got much worse. It feels like my left side is just not working properly, though I can still move it. It just feels so heavy and dead. I hate this so much. I have to see my dr again tomorrow anyway so guess I will have to suffer until then. Didn't use to worry too much about these feelings before as they were occasional but now everyday. Feel tired but haven't got a headache yet though it will only be time before it comes. Also feel a bit dizzy/unsteady.

The odd thing is that I went out on Saturday night and Dave said after a few glasses of wine I didn't complain how I felt. Don't know whether it was because I just stopped worrying or because the feelings went.
Julie

sadie
15-03-04, 20:59
Julie,

You probably just forgot about how you felt and the symptoms would have just disappeared. I used to be so busy at work that I never thought about how I was feeling e.g if I had a tight chest or whatever, but as soon as I had nothing to occupy my mind I suddenly felt symptoms!! The mind does play tricks on us.

Im not suggesting that the symptoms aren't real...I do know how you feel but they just seem more prominent when we have more time to worry and think about them.

Good luck with your GP...let me know what he says to you about the numbness and weakness down your body.

Take care

sadie

nomorepanic
15-03-04, 21:25
Jules

If these were real life-threatening symptoms then they would not disappear when you were relaxed (e.g. after a couple of glasses of wine).

Does this tell you anything?

I used to find that if I relaxed then the symptoms went away so it may be the same with you.

Good luck at the doctors.

Nicola

Jules31
16-03-04, 13:18
Nicola

Hope you're right the problem is I did get quite drunk which made me feel awful the next day, so I can't honestly remember whether I had the feelings or not. I asked my friend if I complained at all and she said I didn't

I do have some good news though, I have just done my first Crown Court hearing and I managed to get through it without a panic attack or going faint. Oddly I feel dreadful now and did straight afterwards, faint, with the heaviness and an awful headache, but it's a big achievement for me. I've been trying to do it since August 2002

Jules

nomorepanic
16-03-04, 15:21
Jules

Well let's hope that it wasn't a one-off and that when you were relaxed the symptoms did go away.

Well done on the Court hearing. You probably felt bad afterwards as it was a release of all the build up of worry. I fell like that when I achieve something big (like a long drive). When I went to Leeds last year and I got home I just burst into tears cos of the relief of it all.

When are you going to go back again?

Nicola

Meg
16-03-04, 16:36
Well Done Jules,

I know that was a big deal for you. You must have been concentrating very hard and are only now feeling the consequences of the nervous build up.

I hope the next one is soon so you can build on the achievement.






Meg

Watch your thoughts, they become your words...
Watch your words, they become your actions... Watch your actions, they become your habits... Watch your habits, they become your character... Watch your character, it becomes your destiny...

Jules31
17-03-04, 11:32
Meg, Nicola

I think my next court hearing will be tomorrow, my boss as asked me to help out in case he isn't back from the dentist. I really could do with out it.

I saw my dr yesterday and has referred me for counselling because he thinks all the stress I went through with my Dad dying and everything that followed could have got me where I am now.

I mentionned to him about keeping getting blurred vision and he told me to go and get my eyes checked. So I'm really worried about this now. I'm going this afternoon. I'm getting it quite a lot in my left eye in the left corner. Had it about four or five times in an hour and a half on Saturday and then once in my right eye.

I also mentionned the heaviness in my leg and arm and he examined my leg and said it felt like it had equal strength to the other one. He asked me if it was just heavy and I said it was though sometimes it felt hard to move, as though a heavy weight. I've been thinking about it now and alot of the time it feels really stiff, which I didn't mention. Would this make a difference. This morning my arm is really aching and sore, though I did sleep on a rug in my bedroom and ended up on the bedroom floor on Sunday night so wonder whether this could be making things worse. It does now hurt to lift my leg but it's more of an ache/tenderness.

The left side of my face feels heavy again too today, almost as though the left side of my head has gone to sleep but I can still feel it. The dr said to go back if my headaches continue. He still thinks they could be migraines. Though of course they will continue cos I've had them for nearly two years just not as bad as lately. Guess I'm just worrying cos the dr didn't say it was all caused by anxiety but then he didn't say it wasn't. Am I just blowing this all out of proportion. Does it still sound like anxiety to you guys

As you can see I'm a bit less rational today about everything.
Hugs
Jules

blossom
17-03-04, 21:55
I have been reading the messages in the forum about the migraines, and blurring vision, also about the stiffness in the neck, and across the shoulders, I have that practically everyday, and the the headaches starts, I am forever taking Panadol, I keep putting it down to the Cipralex SSRI, as I always had that when I was on other SSRI like Seroxat, and thats the reason I came off them, but am still having them on the ones I am on now.
I buy thos Migraleve strips to go on the head, but then I dont have to work, so am able to have it on at home, without anyone seeing me. I keep cleaning my specs all the time, I always think of a tumor on the brain or something like that, One never feels really well, when they have anxiety do they, and as you say anticipatory thoughts dont help, like the move I am in the middle of, have headaches everyday, You all have my sympathy. love Blossomx

stimpy
18-03-04, 09:58
Having your eyes checked sounds like a fantastic idea.
They can tell all sorts of things.

I'm sure it is nothing to worry about, and that Mr Panic is causing symptoms just to scare you.
But to be on the safe side it is better to get your eyes checked out,
it could well be that you just need a new set of glasses.

When you go and see them, tell them the symptoms you are having and that the doctor thinks you may be having migraines.
It will help them to give you the best treatment.

Love, light and Best wishes
Liz xxx

[:p] Panic Monster & Scatty Eccentric

Jules31
18-03-04, 10:11
Went to get eyes checked and they ok, slight deteriroration but not enough to need new glasses. She said the back of my looked healthy and my visual field test was ok, so peripheral vision must be. I assume my optic nerve was ok too. So trying to stop worrying, Am I right that if there was something neurological wrong that she would have been able to tell? Meg sure you can answer this

Off to court now again, wish me luck

Jules

Jules31
18-03-04, 13:01
Just wanted to say I managed court again, even though I felt pants. So it wasn't a fluke. Felt terrible before and afterwards but the time I was in there on my feet wasn't so bad because I didn't have time to think how I felt. Hope this keeps up

Thank you all for your continuing support.

I've got CBT again tonight, though haven't done all my tasks I have to admit because have been so busy at work, I honestly haven't had time.

Hugs
Jules

Lottie32
18-03-04, 13:15
Well done Jules

Just keep these positive thoughts in your head, try and forget the negative and keep working at it!

THere are times when I havent' been able to finish everything I should have done for a CBT session. So long as you are trying, it doesn't matter - it's not like an exam where you must learn all the knowledge before the exam date. So long as you are genuinely trying, continue to work at your own pace, things will slowly start to "click"

Also, and I'm not being horrible, instead of thinking that your eyes are ok, but would they have noticed a neurological problem, turn your thoughts around. Just focus on the fact you have healthy eyes and try to stop worrying !!!!!

So glad work is getting a little easier. Keep up the hard work, it's often not easy, but the result is definitely worth it!

Charlie

What doesn't kill you makes you stronger.

Jules31
18-03-04, 14:25
Thanks Charlie, you're right, still have to turn my thoughts around. I'm battling with the worst headache at the moment. It's almost debilitating but I'm struggling on.

Just re-read my post about the incident with the rug in the bedroom, I didn't sleep on it, I meant to say slipped, duh.

Jules

Lottie32
18-03-04, 14:42
Hi Jules

So glad you didn't take offence!!! I really want to say the right thing to make you realise that you ARE going to be ok, and the all the horrible and debilitating symptoms you are suffering from are just manifestations of your anxiety. HONESTLY. I have been there and got numerous t shirts to prove it.

Keep working at it ,and one day very soon you will start to feel better and better.

You are doing so well - just keep hold of the positive and let the negative go (so much easier said than done I know!!!)

Glad you sorted the rug out - I was thinking well if I'd slept on the bedroom floor, I wouldn't be feeling too good either!!!!!!!

Charlie

What doesn't kill you makes you stronger.

Meg
18-03-04, 15:05
Well done for another successful court .. Hurrah. Good on you .

'wasn't so bad because I didn't have time to think how I felt'

Jules - does this situation amongst others demonstrate to you that these symptoms are wildly exacerbated by dwelling on them and constantly looking for a 'illness like ' source.
I fully believe that you do have bad headcahes./ migraines but if you were truly very ill you would not have time periods that were easier when you were fully occupied.

Yes the opticians would have been able to spot any distortions or growths or anatomical changes or diabetes or damage.

I do personally know how hard it is to force yourself to ignore symptoms but it does work .. I urge you to try to shift your threshold of questioning and worrying about your symptoms . If you've had XX for a while, accept that whilst its awful, you have lived with it for XX weeks and are still standing and simply will not worry about it and everytime you think of it - immediately STOP - do not allow the thoughts to continue to dwell on it, but reassure yourself that you are safe and fine- just like last time and the time before and the time before that .. It will take time and effort- but it does lead to enormous relief.

I'm so sorry you are having such a hard time of it, but you are going to feel better when you start to get used to that pattern

I hope the CBT is working on this too.





Meg

Watch your thoughts, they become your words...
Watch your words, they become your actions... Watch your actions, they become your habits... Watch your habits, they become your character... Watch your character, it becomes your destiny...

bishop
18-03-04, 20:04
hi meg, nic
had a lot of problems lately ,with headaches,blurred vision,going hot cold,been told i should hold my temper,and go back to the doctors,all i wanted was some peace and quiet.
bish

Meg
18-03-04, 20:22
Hi Bish,

Sounds like there been quite a bit going on leading up to this ?
Did you lose your temper with someone ?


Meg

nomorepanic
20-03-04, 22:37
Hi Bish - long time no see - how are you?

Jules - well done on making court again - you did it so that is great.

Try to fight off the negative thoughts and replace them with "I feel great" ones. Hard to do I know. Like a lot in here have said, you have had the aches/pains a long time and if they were life-threatening then you would not get any relief from them atall.

Keep your chin up ok?

Nicola

sadie
21-03-04, 01:33
Hi Jules,

I think that you are doing so well in coping with your headaches and the negative thoughts etc.. Well done on attending court 'panic free' again. Just goes to show you can do it!!

Take care

sadie

red
21-03-04, 23:46
Hi Jules
Just read through all of the posts here and have read some really sound advice given to you. From your first post to your last post, it seems that you have made a good deal of progression, even if it doesn't feel like it - well done!

Keep chatting!

Red
x

Jules31
22-03-04, 11:38
thanks for all the praise and help

I've had a bit of a rough weekend, with the left sided stuff and derealisation but am stuggling on.

Am really working hard at not asking for too much reassurance, CBT therapist has told Dave that when we are together he can only reassure me once an hour and if I mention how I feel more than that, then he is too ignore me. It's really hard but I can see the rationale behind it.

I managed to go and stay with some friends overnight on friday which was really tough on me cos Ihad nowhere to escape to, but I did it and hid most of my feeings.

Hope you are all well
Jules

Meg
22-03-04, 18:26
More progress.

Sounds like you're doing better than you're giving yourself credit for as you're so wound up in feeling every inch of your symptoms.

A bit of 'Just F Do It' is good for us sometimes and relying on feeling safe and secure within ourselves , rather than constantly looking outside for reassurance.

Gary always used to say I was never too far away to come and bring me home if I felt that awful, that was good enough for me that I never even rung him to say Hi and I've arrived/leaving.


Meg

Watch your thoughts, they become your words...
Watch your words, they become your actions... Watch your actions, they become your habits... Watch your habits, they become your character... Watch your character, it becomes your destiny...

Jules31
23-03-04, 14:10
thanks for that Meg I know what you mean.

I'm having a really tough day today as I've been worrying about the left sided stuff. My arm and leg feel really heavy and sort of stiff and are like it all day. My left hand is even aching as I type this. Whenever I lift either of the limbs it feels like they are made of lead. it feels like it is getting worse, though I don't know if that is just because I'm concentrating on it. Although they feel weak I can still do things though it's uncomfortable to do some of them. Yesterday I tried doing knee bends and it felt like my left leg would give out. Does everyone still think that anxiety can do this. It's been going on for weeks now. I didn't mind when it was epidsodic last year cos it was months in between the feelings, now it's everyday.

Anyway sorry to be on a bit of a downer,hope you are all well
Jules

I'm feeling really giddy and off balance too and guess what the headaches are back. I hate this so much

Meg
23-03-04, 17:11
It's really so awful Jules I know ...

You can still use them though so haven't lost all stength. How much of this today is related to court tomorrow ??





Meg

Watch your thoughts, they become your words...
Watch your words, they become your actions... Watch your actions, they become your habits... Watch your habits, they become your character... Watch your character, it becomes your destiny...

Jules31
23-03-04, 17:40
No I haven't lost all strength, it just feels like it's going, compared to my right side.

Are you psychic, how did you know I'm going to court tomorrow. Was supposed to be in office all week and now been dumped on, so have to go. Had all feelings before I knew about it but left sided stuff def feels worse now. Going to go home and have a long hot bath I think.

Dave has just called to say he's leaving for home too, so will try and weedle a big hug out of him even if I can't have the reassrance.

Guess today is just a bad day

Hugs
Jules

Meg
23-03-04, 18:00
Dear Jules,

No, nothing so thrilling . You told us in another post !!

Meg

Jules31
24-03-04, 10:07
see I really have lost it - can't even remember what I have put, oh well,off to be slaughtered by the Judge

Jules

Lottie32
25-03-04, 12:44
Jules

I really think you are being too hard on yourself!!!

Try and find the reverse side to every thought. I know you are really suffering at the minute, with your headaches and heaviness, and this must be really getting you down.

However, DESPITE everything you are experiencing at the minute, you are still functioning. You haven't given in to it. You are still going to work.

Give yourself a huge pat on the back. The fact you haven't given in is progress itself.

As Sadie so rightly said, once you start to relax a little bit more, the physical symptoms really will abate!!! My tummy is so much better since I started on the Prozac - and I thought it had improved before then!!!!

Take care

Charlie

What doesn't kill you makes you stronger.

Jules31
25-03-04, 13:45
thanks Charlie (and everyone) for the words of sanity.

I'm really p****d off at the moment, as my CBT therapist has just cancelled my appointment this afternoon. I now have to wait until next week. It was one of the things keeping me going.

You're right at least I am still at work and even though I only work full time over the last few weeks I must have done nearly full time hours at least four days a week. Guess I just want to make more progress than I am. Though thinking about it in the last week, I've been out to a new restaurant, well one where I last had a panic attack, been to court three times, stayed over at a friend's house and done some food shopping, without having to be forced by Dave. I survived them all even though some of it made me feel pants. Guess all in all that is pretty damn good!

My left arm was a lot better this morning, though now it's really aching and my hand and forearm feel sore and stiff to move. Only came on after the cancellation. Could it be that anxiety stuff. ummm!!!!!!!!!

By the way Charlie,the tape does help a little, but I usually am so shattered that I'm too tired to listen to it.

Julie

Meg
25-03-04, 16:45
Jules,

You're making progress and finally realizing that your symptoms do get worse when you're worried and stressed .

I hope you're continuing to journal so you can see your progress.

You have done lots these last few weeks- well done




Meg

Watch your thoughts, they become your words...
Watch your words, they become your actions... Watch your actions, they become your habits... Watch your habits, they become your character... Watch your character, it becomes your destiny...

stimpy
26-03-04, 10:07
Your doing just fine. Don't be so hard on yourself.
Just the fact that you are able to go out to work, I think is amazing.

Calming thoughts, hun.

Love, light and Best wishes
Liz xxx

[:p] Panic Monster & Scatty Eccentric

red
26-03-04, 11:01
Hiya Jules
Have been reading your 'history' with interest and am so pleased of your progress. It could be that you are at the stage where what you are really afraid of is the fear of going backwards - which you clearly are not doing!

Once we feel much better and are more 'mobile' thoughts still pop up for a while like 'what if it comes back again' - a little twinge (or numbness in your case) sends the message 'is this all going to start again'. And with everyone of these 'messages' we have to be careful and say - "Yeah, so what?" which will in turn kick out the subconcious thought so it won't come into our concious again. Hard work eh? Not really!

You are doing great - you will probably find a lot of people on here who could do with your help on how to get the courage to do stuff like you have been doing. Listen to everyone when they tell you that your courage and determination is enviable and maybe pass on some tips on how you did it - like going to the restaurant - it would help some sufferers very much.

Again well done Jules, take care.

Red
x

Jules31
29-03-04, 11:18
Thanks everyone for all of your support.

I guess I am too hard on myself, just because I feel as though I'm not making any progress. I have been taking steps like these for ages but have continued to feel horrible. Will just have to try and not give in I suppose and keep going.

I would be more than happy to share my tips with anyone, though not sure that I really have any. I just have to keep on plugging away and no matter how bad I feel, do things, like going to restaurants. I did feel horrible when I got there and it was even more difficult because

Jules31
29-03-04, 11:21
oops pressed the wrong key

was difficult because I couldn't complain to Dave how I feel as I'd already used up my complaining and reassurance for that hour. (all CBT therapist allows me). So I sat there all tense and fidgety and hot and dizzy for a while. The feelings didn't go, they just eased a little as I ordered my food and had a couple of beers. It really was exhausting though

Oh well guess I'd better go, got tonnes to do at work and didn't get in until late.

Hope you all are ok

Jules

stimpy
29-03-04, 23:26
Naughty CBT !
They are meant to give you an appointment with enough time as you need, not clock watch and wonder off when the hour is up.

Feeling horrible is all part of the panic condition, it is just another way Mr Panic likes to throw a spanner in the works to make you feel you are doing badly.
He makes you feel horrible, so you panic, Mr Panic gains control again. - He's a sly little devil.

I think you are doing just great.

Love, light and Best wishes
Liz xxx

[:p] Panic Monster & Scatty Eccentric

Jules31
30-03-04, 10:46
sorry Liz, therapist is lovely. I just didn't explain myself very well. My therapist has said that Dave can only reassure me once an hour about the way I feel, sounds a lot but it's really tough.

I'm in a cow of a mood this morning and have argued lots with Dave, mainly cos he wasn't reassuring me, I am horrible. So I'm going to lock myself in a room and work on my own for a couple of hours and see if I can calm down. I can't rationalise anything at the moment and I feel really yuck.

Take care
Jules

Jules31
31-03-04, 14:55
I was just going to complain about how I felt, as I've had a headache and felt giddy all morning. Then I had a conference with the police and felt like I was going to pass out and when I came out of the room, it felt like the floor was sinking beneath me, when I thought yes I might be feeling all these but no one at work knows and I got through everything. I just really want to stop feeling like this.

I've been so achey and exhausted since the weekend that things are getting to me.

Jules

kate
31-03-04, 15:44
Hiya Jules,

Sorry to hear you are feeling so bad at the moment.

BUT remember that although you felt so crappy, you still did it and came out the other side!

We're made of tough stuff us panickers!

Take care, Jules

Kate x

sadie
31-03-04, 20:05
Hi Jules,

You have been coping so great lately with the headaches and heaviness etc...always remember that it is just anxiety thats causing these horrible symptoms. They are always there because they no they can scare you!! Keep telling yourself over and over that they are not important and that they are just caused by anxiety, thats all!!!

Hang in there..and keep positive.[8D]

Take care

sadie

Meg
31-03-04, 20:45
Dear Jules,

You're doing something constructive about it now and not immediately being convinced it's some dreaded lurgy and most importantly you have reported several times now a difference between calm times and stressed times in the severity of symptoms.

You're on the right track ! Well done


Meg

"Come to the edge."
"We can't. We're afraid."
"Come to the edge."
"We can't. We will fall!"
"Come to the edge."
And they came.
And he pushed them.
And they flew.

- Guillaume Apollinaire

Jules31
01-04-04, 10:31
Thanks Guys

I guess I should be more patient. Meg I don't really feel like I'm doing anything that I haven't done before. Maybe I am

I'm just scared that I will never get better as I've been like this for so long. Can't believe the bloody moving feelings are worse than ever. Oh well

Jules