AJS
29-12-10, 22:04
i have been suffering from anxiety/panic disorder for 16 months now last oct -jan i was a mess couldnt eat or sleep and had constant panic attacks and anxiety - was off work and couldnt get out of bed. eventually went onto 20mg citalopram and propananol - which took about 4 weeks to start working - went to see a stress counsellor on and off.
Have gone through the past year having times that i am 90% better - all i have to deal with is a bit of anxiety - which i can handle - then i seem to have these major setbacks - where i have a big panic attack which seems to set off my adrenaline and i am in bits again for a week or so - and start to get better again.
I had been doing well recently and have managed to cut down the citalopram from 20 to 10mg and had completely stopped the propananol, but on monday there we packed up the car to travel to my partners parents in ireland - we got about 180 miles and BOOM - panic kicks in - couldnt calm down and eventually partner had to turn the car around and head home - all wanted was to get home to a safe place. obviously i have really upset my partner and wee girl cos they cant get to see their irish family and it's been like walking on eggshells. I have been back to having recurring panic attacks and constant anxiety since.
I am now worrying that i will be like this for the rest of my life - going to call the doc tomorrow and see if i can get an appt to increase the citalopram again - just gutted that i had been doing so well and now its all wasted.
i am thinking of phoning the employee assistance helpline that our work provides to see if i can see someone.
cant sleep again and when i do waking up in panic, my tummy is constantly churning and tht horrible sense of doom keeps overtaking my whole mind and body.
i have learned a lot this year of how to try and control it - but when i get this way nothing seems to work.
i am taking 20mg of propananol every 3 hours to try and stay calm - thn i start to worry incase it does damage to my heart!
why oh why do we have to suffer like this - just want to go back to the way i was before all this started!
Have gone through the past year having times that i am 90% better - all i have to deal with is a bit of anxiety - which i can handle - then i seem to have these major setbacks - where i have a big panic attack which seems to set off my adrenaline and i am in bits again for a week or so - and start to get better again.
I had been doing well recently and have managed to cut down the citalopram from 20 to 10mg and had completely stopped the propananol, but on monday there we packed up the car to travel to my partners parents in ireland - we got about 180 miles and BOOM - panic kicks in - couldnt calm down and eventually partner had to turn the car around and head home - all wanted was to get home to a safe place. obviously i have really upset my partner and wee girl cos they cant get to see their irish family and it's been like walking on eggshells. I have been back to having recurring panic attacks and constant anxiety since.
I am now worrying that i will be like this for the rest of my life - going to call the doc tomorrow and see if i can get an appt to increase the citalopram again - just gutted that i had been doing so well and now its all wasted.
i am thinking of phoning the employee assistance helpline that our work provides to see if i can see someone.
cant sleep again and when i do waking up in panic, my tummy is constantly churning and tht horrible sense of doom keeps overtaking my whole mind and body.
i have learned a lot this year of how to try and control it - but when i get this way nothing seems to work.
i am taking 20mg of propananol every 3 hours to try and stay calm - thn i start to worry incase it does damage to my heart!
why oh why do we have to suffer like this - just want to go back to the way i was before all this started!