harasgenster
07-01-11, 13:21
Hi
Does anyone else feel worried a lot about how their problems are having knock-on effects on the people they know and work for and that that in turn makes the anxiety worse?
I feel really guilty a lot of the time about the burden I can be but also very nervous that I'll end up alone once people just can't take any more. This isn't a completely stupid fear as relationships have fallen apart in the past due to the difficulty people have with coping with me and my obsessive behaviour. Also friends have discreetly removed themselves from my life at times when I'm a bit of a handful then reappeared when I'm calmer and my best friend once even said she was just not going to talk to me until I was better! (although she did apologise a couple of weeks later).
I don't blame them for needing some space from me like that because it can get quite full on and intense and, particularly in the case of my boyfriend and best friend, I know the reason they need that space is often because they get so worried about me that they need to be able to look after themselves!
I don't want to be a worry to others and I don't want to chase people away with my fears. I can tell my boyfriend's finding it harder and harder to be patient with me. My anxiety affects him the most as he lives with me and I neither want to be such a concern nor chase him away. Of course, the more I worry about chasing him away, the more I want to tell him how much I love him, which becomes clingy, which eventually chases them away!
I'm sure a lot of people must get anxious about the way their worries and avoidances and obsessions start to affect others. How did you cope with it? I don't want to make myself worse by getting worried about it because that's hardly going to help!
Does anyone else feel worried a lot about how their problems are having knock-on effects on the people they know and work for and that that in turn makes the anxiety worse?
I feel really guilty a lot of the time about the burden I can be but also very nervous that I'll end up alone once people just can't take any more. This isn't a completely stupid fear as relationships have fallen apart in the past due to the difficulty people have with coping with me and my obsessive behaviour. Also friends have discreetly removed themselves from my life at times when I'm a bit of a handful then reappeared when I'm calmer and my best friend once even said she was just not going to talk to me until I was better! (although she did apologise a couple of weeks later).
I don't blame them for needing some space from me like that because it can get quite full on and intense and, particularly in the case of my boyfriend and best friend, I know the reason they need that space is often because they get so worried about me that they need to be able to look after themselves!
I don't want to be a worry to others and I don't want to chase people away with my fears. I can tell my boyfriend's finding it harder and harder to be patient with me. My anxiety affects him the most as he lives with me and I neither want to be such a concern nor chase him away. Of course, the more I worry about chasing him away, the more I want to tell him how much I love him, which becomes clingy, which eventually chases them away!
I'm sure a lot of people must get anxious about the way their worries and avoidances and obsessions start to affect others. How did you cope with it? I don't want to make myself worse by getting worried about it because that's hardly going to help!