View Full Version : Binge eating
Hi Karen,
I did wonder if that was the clinic you went to, thanks for confirming it as I wasn't sure. Now I know it is the right clinic I realise that the account from that patient is not what is currently happening, in fact the whole website seems misleading and not just slightly! Basically they are not providing any of what they claim to offer are they! Even prior to reading that I understood why you are disappointed with the treatment though or lack of it should I say.
Anyway I hope you're feeling a bit better this evening, still thinking of you sis.
Night night, sleep well.
Love and (((((hugs))))),
Lisa x
Thank you Piglet and Lisa.
Lisa: It is rather misleading. There is now a DVD too which is just as bad, if not worse.
There are some good people working there who try their best, but most are not trained and organisation as a whole is non existent. Getting appropriate therapy is like asking for the moon, when this is what they are being paid to provide.
Well, on Thursday we were asked to write an account of triggers, emotions etc of a crisis period - moment, day, weekend as in my case. I can certainly say this has been a crisis weekend.
As for how I've been today - :([Sigh...].
Night sis and Piglet.
Karen xx
Hi Karen,
Sorry you've had a bad day, tomorrow is a new day and I hope it's better. Hope you have a good day at the clinic too.
Night sis,
Love and hugs,
Lisa x
Morning Karen
(((((HUGS)))))
Hope today goes a little better for you hun:D
Loads of love n hugs
Aunty Fee xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx
Fee xxxxxx
www.like2like.com
Why live life anticipating the bad things when you could be anticipating the good?
Good and bad things WILL happen!
Hope you have a nice day :)
Love Piglet x
"Supposing a tree fell down, Pooh, when we were underneath it?" said Piglet.
"Supposing it didn't," said Pooh after careful thought.
Hi Karen,
I hope you have a good day too. The sun is out here, it's really nice. I hope it's like that where you are.
Take Care,
Heather
Hi Karen,
I hope you're feeling better today and that your day at the clinic went well.
Thinking of you.
Lisa x
Hi Karen...
How you doing today?
Thinking of you.
Loads of love
Aunty Fee xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx
Fee xxxxxx
www.like2like.com
Why live life anticipating the bad things when you could be anticipating the good?
Good and bad things WILL happen!
Thank you all for the messages. It has not been a very good day. I am feeling so low and depressed, and didn't have a chance to talk to anyone about it properly. We had a group support session but I didn't feel able to discuss what I have been going through these past few days. In fact, I am too scared to tell anyone really.
I know I said I wouldn't do this but I've had those stomach pains back again today, although nowhere near as severe as before. However, all I wanted to do was come home to bed with a hot water bottle.
I took a token half a sandwich for lunch but didn't eat it. I have had some rice cakes and fruit tonight but really want to avoid eating altogether.
Missing K already.
Karen xx
(((((KAREN)))))
Wish there was more I could do to help but I have no energy or brain cells tonight.
I am thinking of you still though - please take care of yourself hun.
Loads and loads of love
Aunty Fee xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx
Fee xxxxxx
www.like2like.com
Why live life anticipating the bad things when you could be anticipating the good?
Good and bad things WILL happen!
Just saying night night and nice to hear from you today :)
Love Piglet xx
Hi Karen,
Sorry you are still struggling and haven't had a great day. I can understand you being scared to talk at the clinic now, but I also wonder how anyone can help you if you now can't tell anyone what is happening. I wish I knew what the answer was or what to say or do to help.
I hope your tummy settles, please look after it and yourself, if you're still taking xenical please take no more, it's probably that making your tummy bad again.
I hope you manage to sleep well sis and have a better day tomorrow.
Lisa x
hey Karen,
sorry to here yesterday was crappy for u!!! hows your tummy today??
Ammegxxxx
((((((KAREN))))))
Thinking of you xxxxxxxxxxxxx
Fee xxxxxx
www.like2like.com
Why live life anticipating the bad things when you could be anticipating the good?
Good and bad things WILL happen!
Hi Karen,
Still thinking about you and hope you're ok.
Take Care,
Heather
Hi Karen,
I hope you're feeling better today and also have a better day at the clinic.
Thinking of you,
(((((hugs)))))
Lisa x
Hope your ok mate :)
Love Piglet xx
Hi all
Thanks for the best wishes and kind messages. I am very grateful for all the support despite the fact I do things which are harmful for myself and cause concern.
My stomach has not been so bad today after taking a couple of the Mebeverine anti-spasmodic pills my doctor prescribed last time. I wish I could say I have completely stopped taking the Xenical but I can't lie about it. But I haven't taken so many as I am back in restricting mode again now in an attempt to make up for the weekend.
I managed not to take any laxatives yesterdays but have taken them today. I can't handle the bloated feelings I get when I don't use them.
This morning I did manage to have a quick catch up with Julia and I did admit to the events of the weekend, even though I was really scared about it. I even told her I was in pain yesterday and that I skipped lunch but did eat a little in the evening.
One of the reasons I trust her is because she doesn't go into panic mode and cause a huge scene about what I am doing. We talked about the events leading up to the crisis, how I got caught in the spiral and with no one to actually speak to about it, she understands how difficult it is to pull back once I've hit that crisis point.
She also said it is good that I managed to eat something yesterday and didn't make a big song and dance about the fact I'd skipped lunch, or that what I did eat was not very much.
We talked about a group exercise we did yesterday which she said very well demonstrated my current struggles and my fears, ie my core belief that I am bad and deserve punishment, either from others and even more so from myself, and also that because I don't have any self worth I expect to be rejected and abandoned. She said that I have good insight into why things go wrong and need help to start to change and turn things around.
Although I mentioned CBT again, she just said that changing core beliefs is something that could be covered in a group CBT session and she also gave me some photocopied pages from a CBT self help book. Not quite the response I was hoping for [Sigh...]. I still think I need individual CBT help because it is difficult to stay motivated doing self help book exercises and I wouldn't feel comfortable sharing a lot of stuff in the group.
We had a group session on assertiveness but to be honest it is stuff we've done before and I feel so tired today that I was having trouble staying awake, let alone staying focused. I crashed out on the sofa in the lounge at lunchtime - after eating some of a sandwich - listening to some music. I didn't sleep but I feel worn out all the time. I have another migraine too which doesn't help.
I was going to come home early and Julia said she would put today down as half a session because there was no formal group work this afternoon but as I was about to go I found out we had to go to the hospital for the weekly blood tests. So I didn't get home much earlier than normal. I am shattered now.
Thank you to Lisa, Fee, Piglet, Ammeg and Heather for your messages.
Karen xx
Hi Karen
Well done - what a star you are for sticking with it and being so pro-active, something I don't think you could have done a few months ago? You may not believe it but I think you are on the right road even though you feel like you are falling into pot-holes and are getting so little in the way of support.... Julia obviously sees what we see, that your ability to understand the issues is what will get you through eventually....
I agree one to one cbt would be hugely beneficial and I still think that if you could find someone privately it would be brilliant - I have heard a lot of stories of NHS cbt being unreliable, with people leaving and cancelling appts and stuff since I started it so if there is any way you could pay for it I think it would be worth every penny.. did you look at the Rock Clinic site?
I may be a little evangelical about it (I've just had my session lol!!) but I am so hugely impressed with the sessions I have had...
Try and stay with it if you possibly can, get out your book of inspirations and try to be kind to yourself today - you have done so well!!!!!
((((((KAREN))))))
Loads of love n hugs
Aunty Fee xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx
Fee xxxxxx
www.like2like.com
Why live life anticipating the bad things when you could be anticipating the good?
Good and bad things WILL happen!
Hannahlou84
09-05-06, 18:21
Sounds like a positive day in all, even if you are feeling grotty.
You will find a lot of the CBT stuff you can do on your own, in fact most of it is "homework", perhaps Julia could work on this with you? Or anybody else there would could discuss it with you.
Well done for all of that today- I know it's hard when you really don't feel like it.
Hannah x
"I just wanna live my life sedated, cos I love driving myself away"
Thanks for the replies:
Fee: I could find the money for CBT from what I have left from my house sale but I am a bit frustrated that there are CBT therapists at the clinic and I can't seem to be referred to one no matter how many times I ask.
I did look at the clinic you recommend and although I could make it to Brighton, I'd prefer to see someone a bit closer to home really. I'm shattered with my 3 days at the clinic and another regular drive to Brighton would add to that. I haven't ruled it out but need to see if I can find a recommendation for someone a bit closer.
Hannah: I agree that a lot of the CBT is homework but I still think it helps with motivation and progress to actually be seeing someone and being steered in the right direction.
Not feeling so good now. Those laxatives have certainly started to have a quick effect on me [xx(]. Just got up to make a hot water bottle but know I am likely to spend the rest of the evening in and out of the toilet. My own fault of course [Sigh...].
Karen xx
Good to hear from you Karen.:)
Just wanted to say I agree with Fee, you have achieved some good things even if it has been hard. Sometimes we need to take a step backwards before continuing forwards, don't push too hard. Give yourself some time. You have a lot going on and need to be nicer to yourself. I hope you can do this.
And I really hope you can find somewhere local for CBT.
Tammy x
Hi Tammy
Thanks for your reply. I do feel like I have taken a major step backwards and am now worse than I've been for a long time,
<b id="quote">quote:</b id="quote"><table border="0" id="quote"><tr id="quote"><td class="quote" id="quote">You have a lot going on and need to be nicer to yourself.<div align="right">Originally posted by tammyg - 09 May 2006 : 21:20:10</div id="right">
</td id="quote"></tr id="quote"></table id="quote">
This is what is so difficult. I continue treating myself badly because that's how I believe I deserve to be treated. This is what Julia was talking about this morning with core beliefs - mine being that I am bad and worthless - and therefore I will continue to find ways to punish myself until gradually that belief can start to be challenged. She said it doesn't really matter how many people tell me this isn't true because to me it is still 100% the truth about me.
She has given me a whole bunch of photocopies of stuff from a CBT book but I suspect it is like information and suggestions I've read before and I really need some individual help with this.
I'm worried about coping tomorrow alone. At first I planned to knock myself out to prevent myself bingeing again, but I have to get up fairly early for an appointment with my dietician. I doubt she is going to be able to help because my thought processes have spiralled further into irrational and self-destructive territory since my last appointment with her. I suppose I could spend the rest of the day asleep as long as I make it home without going in any supermarkets [:I].
Karen xx
Phew, finally managed to get on this thread, kept timing out badly earlier.
Hi Karen.
Well done for having such a good day, so may positives there sis. A big well done for talking to Julia and admitting how things have been, can't have been easy. Julia sounds very sensible about things and it's good you can confide in her.
I too agree individual CBT would be good for you and if you can't get it at the clinic I hope you can find someone privately.
I hope you're ok tonight and sleep well. Sorry this is short, not meant to be on here after seeing the chiropractor.
Night sis,
Love and hugs,
Lisa x
Hi Lisa
<b id="quote">quote:</b id="quote"><table border="0" id="quote"><tr id="quote"><td class="quote" id="quote">Phew, finally managed to get on this thread, kept timing out badly earlier.
<div align="right">Originally posted by LJ - 09 May 2006 : 22:35:26</div id="right">
</td id="quote"></tr id="quote"></table id="quote">
I think it was the whole forum. It froze for ages when I was trying to read a thread and then said service unavailable. It probably is time to start a new thread but I wish it could be on a positive note.
It doesn't feel like a very positive day for me. Apart from my chat with Julia - and again the issue of individual CBT being skirted around - I was so tired I wasn't able to take anything in.
Going to bed earlier doesn't work because I just wake earlier in the morning [|)].
I have so much tidying up and sorting out to do here but feel too tired to do any of it. I feel like I am being so lazy but I am just feeling so lethargic.
Karen xx
Just take it easy and have a rest sis, you're not being lazy.
Hope you sleep well.
Night,
Lisa x
PS Today definitely sounded more positive to me :)
Aw Karen it's so hard to hear you be so hard on yourself... I know there's no point in telling you you don't deserve to be punished but... ooops I just did it again:D
I hope you manage to sleep tonight hun.
Loads and loads of love n hugs
Aunty Fee xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx
Fee xxxxxx
www.like2like.com
Why live life anticipating the bad things when you could be anticipating the good?
Good and bad things WILL happen!
I have now started a new post - due to this one being so long.
All new messages are now on Eating Disorder - Warning - possibly triggering (http://www.nomorepanic.co.uk/showthread.php?t=9997).
Blueeey2shoes..
24-02-08, 01:44
ooh wow Karen..
im new here and you sound just like me - even have the same name too!lol
Yeah im going thru high anxiety and deppression - long story short- 10 yr social phobic-housebound girl in her mid 20s until lst yr finding a male friend on the net and pushed thru the fears to fly over and meet .. first time to ever do anything like that .. didnt turn out like a girl wouldve wanted to put it mildly but madea friend and experiences any how..
Anyway have bad memories id rather forget - ones a girl would not like to remember - ones that severly lower her self esteem and worth..
I was living in a place far from the old me of social phobic until i had to move back and here i am now..
Been 3 months now since ive been back and like living in a nightmare.
I have body dysmorphic disorder and my wieght issues ( im not large) get to me - i lost so much before - too much but i was for once not using food to fill my voids.. it took me years to getto a stage of eliminating and mastering my diet - restricing to smaller meals high in nutrients and grazing on natural fruits and veges ..
until things happened with me - now once again im stuck in a binging low self esteem rutt..
'We' ll start tommorrow eating better and exercizing..' everyday..
What i do which has worked for me is to go for long intense walks around a nice type of country less distracting setting - up and down hills and so forth..
and listening to your fav music -this makes your anxiety lessen and also-
you should drink lots of water, chewing on gum can distract, make sure you have all your vitamins and mineral and your that you have an apple or piece of fruit when you feel really hungry as your blood sugar needs to be filled..
also i take slimist - a specail mouth spray that stops you feeling like eating - comes with sniffers too..
What you need to do is take a few days to really go all out and resist the urges - sleep or do something distracting .. by a few days of not eating as much your body clock will get used to it and so on..
also think before you want to eat something- bingingly..look at the food for what it is rather than waht you can obtain and take etc..
BEat thing is to detox and eat/binge and get used to healthy fruit and veges esp raw .. your body in high times of stress need more nutrients and by eliminating all the convienience packet foods and eating from the garden so to speak your body will attune to what it needs by giving you signals of what you feel like having - like broccoli and stuff..!lol
Get exercise in too - music is a big motivator..
Also the voids in your life you need to have a good dreaming session and think of what you want out of life.. and turn them into goals..
write affirmations too.. : )
nuture yourself -
ive been in a big deppression and trying to get over things at the same time trying to find my way back on my feet and face my big phobic fears.. imve been lowered and now its time for me to try and get back up again..
hope i could help x
Hi Bleeey2shoes (or can I call you Karen?) :welcome: to
the forum.
I was saddened to hear of your experiences. Are you receiving some help to come to terms with it until you feel strong enought it to eat normally.
Sounds like you have been having a hard time of it recently but there is always hope.
Thanks for your suggestions. I have tried most of them in my time. My diagnosis is anorexia and I spend most of my time restricting and have these binge eating episodes following release from Eating Disorder Units. I just returned home after discharging myself from the latest 3 month admission which was a 3 month spell.
I hope we can help support each other. I'm posting on my latest thread now entitled Home (http://www.nomorepanic.co.uk/showthread.php?t=27140)I hope you feel able to join in if you would like :flowers:
Karen xx
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