Hi im new here

[Markie28]

I just wanted to say hi to everyone here , as you can tell im new here and its comforting to know that i am not alone , i have very recently just been dignosed with ocd ( to be honest since i was a child i knew something was not right as i was always had a very obssesive childhood ) up untill december i started having bouts of servere depression for no reason as i have everything to look forward i have a beautiful woman who i want to spend the rest of my life and everything was going perfect i felt like me < then i started getting fears and obssesions of turning gay even though i am a 100% hetro sexual male who gets turned by the female race , but my thoughts and fears felt so real , i was getting mild panic attacks and butterflys in my stomach like nervous tension , i know heart to heart i am straight but it has scared so much i find myself out of habit looking at other males even though i am not sexualy atracted to them in anyway or form i do not or ever intend to act on this as it is not me , i want to marry my beautiful girlfriend and start a family with here but its driving me crazy these unwanted thoughts are in my head constantly that i have grown used to it but in my heart its destroying me as i know what i am , i explained this to my therapist and it led to ocd. another example was during the summer i was suffering servere constipation and and was bleading when i went a toilet , straight i was convinced it was bowl cancer and became ossesed with finding symptoms , am i alone with this condition ??

[diane07]

Hi Markie28

We just wanted to welcome you aboard to NMP. We hope you enjoy your stay here and get all the support and advice you need.

Please take some time to read the website articles on the left as well for loads of advice and tips.

[Vanilla Sky]

Hi and welcome to NMP :welcome:
Paige x

[paula lynne]

Hi Markie, welcome to the forum. Youll find lots of help and support here, youre not alone. We all look forward to getting to know you x

[Captain Caveman]

then i started getting fears and obssesions of turning gay even though i am a 100% hetro sexual male who gets turned by the female race , but my thoughts and fears felt so real

Hi Markie. I used to have the fears of being gay. You'll find people on forums referring to it as HOCD. Here are 2 articles relating specifically to homosexual fears:

http://www.ocdonline.com/articlephillipson7.php

http://westsuffolkpsych.homestead.com/Am_I_Gay.html

I'm not sure exactly of your compulsions, but I'm guessing the following article will relate to you. It's a general overview of how to treat obsessions with compulsions that are non-observable (known on forums/websites as "Pure O" (Purely Obsessional (though things aren't purely obsessional really as there are still compulsions, it's just they are non-observable)) http://www.ocdonline.com/Rethinkingtheunthinkable.php

I've seen on the OCD section of this NMP website that they encourage people to check out more specific forums relating to obsessive and compulisve behaviour. So hopefully it's cool for me to suggest you try the "Stuck In A Doorway" Forum. You'll find plenty of HOCD threads. Many will be on the "Sexual Issues" board. You'll need to become a member to view that board: http://www.stuckinadoorway.org/

[Captain Caveman]

You'll find plenty of HOCD threads.

I should point out that you don't necessarily need to look for only HOCD threads. Obsessive and compulisve behaviour is treated basically the same whether the theme is related to pedophillia (POCD), relationships (ROCD), schitzophrenia (SOCD), harming (HARM-O) or any other theme. Most people experience more than just one theme, so yeah have a read of that ocdonline.com article and others on that website to learn about how to treat obsessive and compulsive behaviour so you'll can handle any type of theme thought.