Stressed32
16-01-11, 18:19
I just want to say that I am so glad this thread is now here. I found great comfort in this site last year with a terrible fear of HIV. I have not been back in quite some time, because honestly, I have been doing pretty well. A little history......4 years ago we lost our 1st baby due to ectopic pregnancy. We have tried very hard to get pregnant ever since and had no luck. We went to the fertility clinic and got pregnant on the 1st try. Well, since then it has been just one worry after another. here how it went:
1. I'm pregnant...but is it in the right place?
2. It is in the right place, but will we hear a heartbeat?
3. We heard a heartbeat, but will my placenta work?
4. My placenta worked, but will she develop normally?
5. She developed normally, now I relaxed a bit (around week 20)
6. wait.....incompent cervix...do I have that??
7. don't have incompentent cervix....will relax a bit now
8. will I die in labor?
9. Will she die and then we have this nursery and all these things and she will not come and I will have to look at all of this??
I know that this is supposed to be such a happy time for us...and I have never been happier...and as a result...I have never been more scared! It is like I am just waiting for something bad to happen. I am really scared...so I went online and googled stillbirth stats...and that did not make me feel any better. Is there anyone else going through this kind of anxiety over your pregnancy? I keep saying if I can just make it past each milestone, then I will relax....but I am not sure I can. Help...this should be a happy time for me.
1. I'm pregnant...but is it in the right place?
2. It is in the right place, but will we hear a heartbeat?
3. We heard a heartbeat, but will my placenta work?
4. My placenta worked, but will she develop normally?
5. She developed normally, now I relaxed a bit (around week 20)
6. wait.....incompent cervix...do I have that??
7. don't have incompentent cervix....will relax a bit now
8. will I die in labor?
9. Will she die and then we have this nursery and all these things and she will not come and I will have to look at all of this??
I know that this is supposed to be such a happy time for us...and I have never been happier...and as a result...I have never been more scared! It is like I am just waiting for something bad to happen. I am really scared...so I went online and googled stillbirth stats...and that did not make me feel any better. Is there anyone else going through this kind of anxiety over your pregnancy? I keep saying if I can just make it past each milestone, then I will relax....but I am not sure I can. Help...this should be a happy time for me.