View Full Version : Fed up!
Anxiety/Stress creeping in, I feel absolutely fed up!
Waiting to see if I'm getting the sack from work is not my idea of fun, I've worked for a bunch of two faced liars that I put my trust in and had a right kick in the teeth. I've been pulled up for not following procedure, but the work I have done is how I have been trained and advised, when I was questioned no bosses backed me up (Fantastic!). Now its me versus the company, what chance do I stand!
The problem I have his I worked my nuts off and ended up potentially losing my job, my house, my self esteem and to a certain degree my family. I'm busy job hunting but getting absolutely nowhere, I've had 2 interviews in 3 months and I've applied for at least 50 jobs, the result is I'm either over qualified or under-experienced but in feedback I come across as confident, which is a plus but I guess I will have to bounce around until I find the right job. I'm trying my best to combat my stress but I know its always lurking round the corner and this could debilitate me from even going to an interview.
I must keep positive but negativity is starting to outweigh this, I need a boost but I'm struggling to motivate myself without having waves of feeling down.
Thanks ifyou have taken time to read this.
Lion King :wall:
have you thought about signing on with a few temp agencies? I used to do temp work a lot before I worked for the NHS, and was never short of work. Also, it gave you the chance to see what a company were like to work for, and often there are opportunities to get a permanent or longer-term job out of a temporary one.
As for your current job, I presume that you don't work anywhere that has a trade union? If you do, then go and have a chat with a rep about what's been going on. If you have to argue it out with them yourself, do you have any records of the training you received? Or of their written procedures? If you've been employed for more than 12 months, then you could look at the possibility of putting in a claim for unfair dismissal if you are sacked. Drop me a PM if you need any more advice - I'm a union rep where I work and I might be able to help out a bit more.
Im so sorry you are feeling like this Lion king :hugs:.Ive followed your progress since you have been here .I think you have been given some excellent advice by the previous poster ,not much I can add to that im afraid .Im sure you will find something eventually be it temp or permanent .Its difficult to find a decent job nowadays but persistence does pay off .Good luck with everything and try to remain positive as nothing stays the same for ever .What you experience does make you stronger in the end .All the best thinking of you ..sue x
Hi Blueangel, suzy sue,
Thanks for your support!
I keep telling myself that this will make me stronger in the end, I know there are bigger issues in the world and I have my health. I went for an interview for a crap job yesterday, I went half hearted and I couldn't find the place, in the end I turned the car around and went home. On the way home I could feel waves of pressure going up the back of my head and over the top, it felt weird!, I can only imagine it could be high blood pressure. I got home and I had to lie down to de-stress and calm down, eventually I felt better. I haven't taken my Citalopram since Tuesday when I ran out so I assume these feelings are side effects?
Today I'm going to the gym and I'm going to thrash some stress out, I've put loads of applications forward this week so I'm sure some positive responses should come back I just need to stay strong and keep re-assuring myself.
Thanks again
LK
Hi again
You could well be getting side-effects from running out of Citalopram - have you got another prescription sorted out? Going cold turkey from anti-depressants can be rather unpleasant. The gym sounds like a good idea - I usually find a bit of exercise helps me as well. Keep us posted with your progress!
Hi Lion King, yes it is really hard to stay positive in such circumstances (I was made redundant nearly two years ago and a lot of nasty and personal stuff went on so I totally sympathise) but you just have to try somehow to keep plugging away.
I'm sure the gym will do you good but also get your meds sorted out - you have enough going on without having to deal with withdrawal symptom as well.
Wishing you lots of luck with the jobhunting xx
Thanks for your replies,
I went to the doctors and picked up my prescription on Friday after I went to the gym, the side effects felt really weird, it felt like I was having waves of high and low blood pressure.
That was friday, now sunday I feel alot better!
I've put my mindset into 'its just a job, if you want to work you will find work mode'. This does make the whole situation easier to digest, I just need to reassure myself on a regular basis.
Thanks again, I will keep posted on the latest.
LK
Greenman50
23-01-11, 15:03
Good luck with it mate , just when you think theres nothing out there , something will come up trumps :D
mtatum4496
23-01-11, 16:41
Lion King, one mistake I think many of us guys make is investing way too much of our self image in our work. Part of that is a cultural thing of course, but something we need to shed for our own good.
Part of the reason I'm in my current situation is that I made my job my life (although at the time I would have laughed at that assessment and pointed out all the rationalizations why that was not true). Work affected my eating, my sleep, and my relationships,. Even when I was away from work, it was on my mind constantly.
I also remember that dreaded phrase - over qualified - as I made the rounds looking for another position when I finally decided something needed to be done. Frustrating is the kindest word that comes to mind.
Today, I am self-employed doing something I always wanted to do when I was younger, but allowed myself to be talked out of, since it was not considered stable. Well, this month celebrates four years since I made that move and while I am not making the money I did at the time I resigned from my last job, I expect to generate roughly the same amount I did in 2003 this year - so it is coming along.
Don't give up, keeping looking for a position that will provide the right balance of peace of mind and allow you to make use of your talents in a way that leaves time for all the other parts of your life. Once you do, you'll find that your emotional healing will move in the right direction and life will be much better.
Thanks for the support, I really appreciate the comments.
I twigged today, all my life I have suffered from an inferiority complex and work and promotions was my fight to prove that I am not weaker or lesser than everybody else. As I was doing well my self esteem and pride in myself would self generate, I think what I am trying to say is that I have not done enough of self acceptance and seen my acceptance in how I am judged from people around me. I think this is another step in battle against anxiety, I think the job situation has had to happen to make me realise this, otherwise I may have kept on going and still carried on suffering. Positiveness and self assurance is my new armour for this next battle.
Bring it on, LK
I got the boot, why do I feel so happy (weird!):D
Sorry you lost your job Lionking :hugs:But you probably feel happy because its the end of all the stress its been causing you ..I hope you got what your were owed ?and you find something with regards to a new job soon ..Try to keep positive and your head up .They didnt deserve you :mad:. T/c and good luck with the job hunting ..sue x:bighug1:
Hi Lionking
I am sorry that you lost your job, but maybe much later on, you will look back and see that it was a good thing to happen, when you find another job which you are much happier in.
Sending you hugs.
Thanks for your support!
I've put an appeal letter forward for what it is worth so see how that goes, if that doesn't work then I guess an industrial tribunal is called for.
I'm happy to move on but the reference is going to be pretty crap unless I can use a previous bosses reference? and one from the call centre job. Maybe its not that bad, I had an interview today, got one Monday and one Tuesday and I've just sent off for more. You never know, I'm positive and thats the best way to be.
Keeping the faith
LK x
Current situation is causing major stress and tension with me and the missis.
We had a big argument today where we both got nasty, now we have calmed down we are ok but the atmosphere is not the best. Has anybody got any advice for both of us to get through this?
LK
It's tough LK, but you really have to try to understand that you're both feeling the pressure and things may be said that neither of you mean. Try not to blame each other for the situation you are in or take it out on each and to stick together. I know that sounds naff but it really is the best way to try to get through this and I'm speaking from experience. Don't let things fester either - if you have a blowout get back on speaking terms or whatever as quickly as possible. I really do understand and wish you both well x
Thanks JaneC,
I think my missis is suffering from anxiety/stress that she did before, its hard to be supportive when you are under attack for least little thing. I will stay positive but it is proper walking on egg shells.
Job interview at 10 in morning so hopefully that will go well!
LK
Had an interview on Tuesday, they asked if I had been dismissed, I said I had (being honest!), they terminated the interview as they have a strict policy on dismissed applicants. How degrading was that!!!!!!
I asked if I could work on a probationary period where I could prove myself but it was black and white.
Not a good experience at all, felt proper down!
Today is a better day, I'm keeping positive so at least that is half the battle towards making my situation better. I've booked myself on a two day course for Fork Lift Truck training and I have a start with an agency at a bacon factory and I have a potential job driving 7.5 tonne wagon so not ideal but not that bad. I'm waiting on a FLT job with another company so plenty to be positive about!
My old work contacted me to put a statement together about a situation at work, rightfully or wrongfully I said 'I had enough to deal with!' instead of aiding there investigations. I have an appeal being processed at the minute with the company and I asked if I wasn't to co-operate would this affect the appeal, the manager said he couldn't comment on that so I chose to say what I had said.
Balls to them I need to look after me and my family not them!
LK
Feel really really low low low:weep:!
I went to an appeal for my old job, I had to rake up all the shit times I had at work last year. I was in 2 minds before going in, now I wish I never and just moved on with life. I can't believe I wanted to be a manager, if you are patronising, condescending and arrogant I guess this is what this company was looking for.
I need to find my place in life I'm just starting to feel a little lost.
Help!
Oh sod it, gave myself a good talking to and a good shake and now I'm feeling much better.
Crap will only get you down if you let it, c'mon lion king enjoy life!
:yesyes:
Aww lion king.
What a nightmare you've had lately have a great big :hugs:from me, i know it won't help, but just letting you know that i'm thinking about you.
di xx
Hi again LK, sorry to hear that the appeal was an unpleasant experience (unfortunately, they're often like this). At least you can file the tribunal paperwork and truthfully say that all avenues with your employer have been exhausted. Drop me a PM if you need any advice.
Had an interview on Tuesday, they asked if I had been dismissed, I said I had (being honest!), they terminated the interview as they have a strict policy on dismissed applicants. How degrading was that!!!!!!
I'm shocked to hear that LK - how discriminatory. I had a whole lot of lies told about me to help ensure I could be made redundant and then other employers basically assume everything is true? :mad:
FWIW I wasted the best part of two months going through the "appeal" nonsense, causing myself a whole lot more extra upset and stress and prolonging the misery. In hindsight wish I hadn't bothered. Best of luck in getting on with your life :hugs: and we're always here when/if you need us xx
Thanks for your support!
I'm feeling much better, the good talking I gave to myself has really worked!
I now tell employers that I wasn't happy in my job so I left, which is half true! I found that my company will not give references so that is good. Its a bit dodgy but if I am honest I am put to the back of the queue in a very tough job market and I need to earn money for my family.
In an ideal world I'm sure honesty would get me everywhere but not in this one.
LK
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