worry and feeling guilty

[Humly]

Just as I was starting to feel a bit better about my health issues I start worrying about something else. Its as if I need to be worrying about something. I tend to expect the worst of every situation and in the past I have worried about some silly things -

Went through a red light at a roundabout by mistake and thought I would be banned from driving or arrested or something.

Opened my car door onto another car in a car park causing a very slight amount of damage and worried about being caught and arrested (how many thousands of times has this happened to someone but because it was me I panicked about it)

I've worried about something I have said that might have upset somebody etc etc and the list could go on and on.

I want to just shrug things off and forget about them but don't know how. Is anybody else like this? How can I get things into perspective and less sensitive?

[heths]

Hi LT,

I've been like this. I've worried about so many things. I do a bit now but not as bad as before.

What has helped me is something my therapist has taught me, which is thought challenging. How this works is by asking yourself questions such as how likely is this to happen, what evidence have I got to support this worry. and what evidence is there that this won't happen. Also what is the worst that can happen and thinking of what you'd do if the worst did happen.

I found it helped aswell to write these questions and answers down. It helps me to put my worries into perspective.

Hope this helps,
Take Care,


Heather

[henri]

Hi there,
I am TOTALLY like this.
My CBT therapist gave me two tricks to deal with this:

1) An exercise called 'worry time'. Firstly, designate a time of day when you will allow yourself to do nothing but worry - let's say 7.30- 8pm. Then, whenever you start worrying about something, think about whether or not you can do anything to fix it right that minute. If there's nothing you can do to solve it immediately, you mustn't allow yourself to worry about it any more. Instead, make a note of it and only allow yourself to think about it during 'worry time'.

2) Take a sheet of paper. At the top of it, write out your problem and why it's bothering you. Then, write a list of reasons explaining why this problem is ridiculous and why you shouldn't be worrying about it. Repeat with all your other problems.

I hope all that made sense. Ultimately it's about rewiring your brain so that it thinks in a more positive way, which is easier said than done.

Take care,

Henri

[Humly]

Thanks for the replies. I am going to try out your suggestions and try and get myself out of this negative state of mind.

Cheers.

[Spice]

Hi

I was also told the same techniques as Henri from my therapist. But she added that if I found myself dwelling on a specfic matter outwith the "worry time" then I should wear an elastic band on my wrist and ping it so that it hurt everytime that I had this thought so that the brain can make a connection not to dwell on this particular thing as that means pain.

Spice

[delta]

Hi LT
I can relate to what you have said 100% I worry constantly, when I have finished with one worry another one comes along immediately to take its place.

I did the red light thing, there are cameras on this particular junction and I was stuck in the middle, for days I was waiting or the knock at the door and to be carted off to the police station. I found £5 in the street and went out of my way to find the owner of it for fear that someone saw me pick it up and accused me of stealing the money, I worry constantly that I will get arrested for things or end up ont he front page of the newspaper and become a hate figure, I am so sick of this vicious worry cycle I have got into........ all these things sound irrational and there are hundreds more I could tell you about but at the time they take over my life. My dh tells me to stop worrying but it's not that simple is it? Should I tell my GP I feel like this, I seem to suffer from so many anxiety related problems I wouldn't know where to start.

I will be interested to read the replies you have received :)
D

[delta]

henri

Have these things worked for you? I would be interested to try the 'worry time', my problem is that my worries happen throughout the day, I'm adding to them constantly.

D

[Humly]

Delta

My husband tells me not to worry too but I cant seem to stop. I am too ashamed to go to my GP as I feel so stupid so want to try some self help stuff. I just wonder why I worry about all the stupid things I do. I just seem to see the worst in every situation. When I think back to all the things that I have worried about in the past I could laugh - they seem so silly now but at the time they were serious to me.

ttfn