A tearful afternoon

[Ambers]

I have deleted top part of post... slightly embarressed about posting now.



Why is life so bloody upsetting, why cant people just be honest and nice...why do I feel so lonely. Maybe it is all my fault and I simply do not fit in

Sorry, had no one to talk to and have left the house in tears

[ladybird64]

Hey there :hugs:

I don't know why life can be so upsetting hun, maybe others have thicker skins than us or maybe we are oversensitive..who knows?

I think that anyone outside of the perceived "norm" (and note the word perceived) tends to be treated differently.

I was deperately lonely too as a kid, only child raised by loving grandparents but always in and out of hospital with illness. Missed a lot of school, had to take loads of meds hence was treated like a freak.

I didn't get the party invites either and it is something that still can get to me today if I dig down deep enough to let it.

When it is our kids that seem to be shunned, it hits the rawest nerves.

BUT...is it your son who is bothered or you? To tell the truth I would be spitting blood at what seems to be an obvious rebuttal but it's not about the adults..it's about the kids. Don't let your boy see that this has got to you..it's all too easy for our defensive mechanism to come into play and to want to prevent our kids from feeling the hurt that we felt.

I'm sure your son will be just fine. If your relative is shunning him and you, then that's her lookout. Never mind blood is thicker than water..relatives that cause you upset like that are best avoided IMO.

Re trying to fit in..look on it this way. Do you really want to fit in with someone who behaves like this? You would invite her lad to your lads party, which do you think is the more "normal" thing to do?

You sound just fine to me. There are thousands of people who use this website from all differing backgrounds and with all different anxieties..we are just a drop in the ocean there are probably thousands more.

You don't have to change yourself to try and fit in anywhere, we are who we are.
Mostly sensitive human beings who care for others. That puts us right at the top of the humanity scale in my book. :hugs:

[Ambers]

Ladybird - thank you, i read and re-read your reply and you are right.. I needed those words. I will still send the invite and give them options if they cant make the day (the same thing happened last year). I think maybe I am over sensitive because of my background - but my son is happy and knows no less - I am slightly embarressed by it all now and wished I were more hardy. I don't shout, argue or ever question back when I disagree with someone - I just bottle it up and eventually cry (alone). Thank you again your reply was great and mucho appreciated.

PS.. going to delete the orginal post has I am now embarressed.

[ladybird64]

It's up to you but can I ask you to reconsider deleting your post?

Please trust me when I say you have nothing to be embarrassed about, I promise.

Caring for your son in the way you do makes you a wonderful mum because you will pass on your kind qualities to him as he grows.

My five are all grown now and I have 8 grandkids..they tell me I did ok.

So will you :hugs:

[KK77]

I don't have much to add to LB's wise words but just wanted to say that being sensitive is a virtue. You may get hurt because sensitive people unfortunately do and the world is indeed a cruel place at times, but there is certainly nothing wrong with you. Hold your head up high and say, "OK, I feel hurt right now but I will get through this".

You can't grow a thick skin overnight and why would you want to? Accept who you are and you'll see that life will become much easier.